Okay, as the title says, do you think hitting your child is ever justified?

Honestly, I've come to realise, it's more a black culture thing, in this day and age. However, that's not me saying it's only black people that do it, it's just black parents tend not to take the stuff some white kids do. 

SO, in the instance that the child is being spoiled as all hell. Like all those kids that are given a brand new car for their birthday and then complain about the colour and try hitting people; yeah, those kids. I think hitting them is okay, because they are used to getting what they want and have never been told no, so they think they can get away with anything. 

Basically, all those kids that have been coddled their whole lives, and their parents just bow to their whim. THOSE kids I think deserve it, IF they do attempt to hurt someone else. 

Please note: I'm not saying just randomly hit your child. I'm saying is there anytime they deserve it. 

TL;DR: Hitting a child that tries to hit others, because they're spoiled is okay, in my opinion.

You should not physically injure a child. Moreover, this isn't how you raise them.

The key to keeping a child in line is raising him from the start to react to various unenjoyable things, such as a belt. Not too hard, because what you're trying to get across is the shock factor of the feeling. It only stings. Eventually they will get the picture and learn how to act, and you will no longer have to do it.

That being said, self defense is always justified, assuming you run into that unlikely of a situation.

tl;dr don't hit them, train them from the start. It's about the thought and the feeling, not the actual damage done.

In some instances, I'd say it's justified.

There are some things that kids shouldn't do no matter what, and if they don't listen to words then a slap will make the work. Beyond that, I don't see any other justification to hit a child.

In some cases, just the menace of hitting will be enough, like yushee has said before me. The emotional impact of getting hit because of misbehavior is also quite heavy, and sometimes heavier than the physical hit itself. However, this doesn't justify the menace of hitting a child just because the parents are mad, there must be a good reason behind it or else the menace will do more damage than good.

I'll agree with Palen about it being ok in some cases but in most it's not. I learned a lot about this in my psych class and we had a big debate and all. Hitting never will change anything, it will just get some kids scared of doing certain things, instead of changing how they do it or realizing something was wrong, so it never fixes anything.

Physical and emotional abuse is not okay. now, kids do need a spanking when they start becoming disrespectful or throwing a tantrum everywhere you go. As they get to the teenage years, it is difficult to spank them since they are stronger and also tend to hold anger towards you so in such cases there are better ways to discipline them such as taking away privileges and having to do community service to learn to be humble and grateful what they have.

Well I can say something to this. I was one of the few or most out of the children in the world along with my siblings got beaten when we were young. Now. This didn't happen to the extent that it was abuse. Nope that wasn't it. It was how palen and zander explained it. When a time a child needs to be justified for beating when it is only NECESSARY. This wasn't something that happened everyday or sometimes it happened rarely. From this I didn't hate my parents it actually helped to build, and be the great kids that we are now today. The most thing we feared from our parents was a look they always give to us for when we were crossing the line. Me? I made sure I would never get beats again.

Only when words or other punishments are not working. Even then,you have to be careful on how you do it. Take for example this video:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iZHVfNATxwk

Warning: This is a little hard to watch for some of us. I personally agree with it. The boy and his father were wearing boxing gloves. The boy was not restrained in any way,the blows were soft blows. The father did not swing with full punches. I will guarantee that boy will not screw up again. It is a hard lesson to administer and receive,but I think he will be a better person for it.

Hitting your child is just plain wrong in my opinion. There are other safer methods of disciplining your child that doesn't involve hitting them such as having a talk with them etc. While hitting your child isn't really abuse it can turn into abuse if it causes bodily harm or you do it unnecessarily. I am against the practice of hitting your kid and think it should only be done "IF" the other options have been exhausted.

m0ssb3rg935 :
Eirinn :
Furret : Would this be better off in the debate forum or here? Looking at the replies and the topic itself makes it a debate topic and think it would be better off in that forum than here but it's your call.

Is your child old enough to understand why you're hitting them?
If yes, then talk to them, and stop hitting your child.
If no, then stop hitting your child.
It's not too complicated. Respect your children, and respect the fact that they are a human being who shouldn't feel a need to act a certain way out of fear that they will be physically assaulted, in any way, by their own parent.

Sounds like something Casey Anthony would do. I don't recommend hitting your child. If you must, then hand them over to someone who is experienced with assaulting children. I'm talking about nuns

PK Axis : I don't think its right to abuse your child but a good spanking or slap should be enough to snap them back into reality the way i see it they never realize how good they have it ,other people are getting raped killed,starved,enslaved,and their here complaining about the internet speed being too slow,dont get me wrong you should'nt downright strangle them or beat them but a slap or a spanking would do,even if their older,it dosnt matter the humiliation will teach them a lesson,that they are blessed with consoles tv ac food water shelter and a nice safe neighborhood to live in with wonderfull parents,they shouldnt be taking advantage of that.

If you feel that the only way to control your child is to resort to violence and abuse, then you're the one who's in the wrong, not the child.

Children do not understand reason or long term consequences. However, as a child gets older, punishments should reflect that. Hitting a child for misbehavior is not wrong. It is usually does not teach them very much, so it is good to discourage.

You should only resort to physical punishments if other methods have failed. Like time out,grounding,taking away a privilege or an item,extra duties,etc. Now I have posted a video in the thread,and I personally agree with the father. The son was constantly skipping school and thinking he can get away with being bad. Now he tried the other things,but they were not working. They were both wearing boxing gloves,and they were going at it. Now,the father was throwing slow,half-hearted punches and the son was not doing well at first. Then he got in a few shots and the father caught him in the face.

Now,this was good for several reasons.

1. Other methods have failed,you have to get physical to get the point across. The point is NOT to beat them,but to show you are serious about the rules of the house.
2. This was a chance for the son to get out some frustration and to get things out in the open.
3. The father was also trying to teach his son about basic self defense and what he should be doing.

Now,I will guarantee that the son will think twice about screwing up.

I will post the video again,because I know people are lazy.

Update: The video was taken down.

Maguc : You are 100% accurate.

If you have to hit or use physical violence as a way to change a behavior or correct a child, you're wrong. And you're a bad parent.

We have one thread complaining about bullying and violence and now we have a thread where most everyone is agreeing that violence is indeed a solution to a problem.

If you hit your kid, you teach them to (a) avoid getting caught and (b) Mom and Dad are mean and they can't trust you as a parent.

"Mom, I'm really sorry because I did so-and-so."

Mom hits kid.

Do you think that kid will come back and be honest or tell the truth the next time they make a mistake? Do you think they'll want help from their mom or do you think they'll just be reinforced that their parents are terrible and won't support them.

I have two kids. I have hit them a total of zero times because it solves nothing. It simply continues acknowledging violence as being the supreme authority. And everyone wonders why bullies are out there.

Ghostbear1111 : But I do think violence solves problems. When someone is not open to reason, you must use force. Your child does not want to be grounded? Lock them in their room. That's force. We draw a line at psychology healthy adult people. Even then, I would argue some psychologically healthy adults often operate on feelings and are not open to reason. In rare instances, violence needs to be used against adults too. Officers sometimes need to use physical force, tasers, or even bullets to stop adults.

As far as hitting specifically goes, it is likely totally counter-productive. The obvious examples are when the child is hurting others or themselves and there are no prudent alternatives. I do think it is entirely appropriate to spank a child if they bite another child to force some empathy into their system.

Depends on scenario
A. Hitting for no reason or for something small or to get them to listen in public.
No this all the wrong areas to just hit a child it may get them to listen in public sense since it may make them embarrassed but still not appropriate timing. This is something where if you can take what they are focused on to get them to pay attention to you or leave since it is usually somewhere they like.

B. In private for something like say breaking something, repeatedly disobeying, just outright being mean.
Yes to an extent. You can "hit" them but don't do it hard more somewhat light to medium and do it somewhere where it wouldn't cause problems later on like their butt.

C. If it is just a problem they made and they don't know why that was a problem
No that is when you act like a responsible parent and explain to them why it was a problem and why they shouldn't do that. Get them to think about it and try visualizing problems they may face when they are older and it isn't their parents they have to go against. Could help solve the problem and potential future ones by getting them to think.

Txgangsta : I think there's an example of irony when you 'force some empathy into system."

The only thing they're understanding is how much getting hit hurts.

And if you're really going to compare spanking a four year for something and a police officer drawing a gun on a bank robber.... c'mon, now. Violence is the supreme authority from which all other authority is derived. Robert Heinlein said that. And it's true. But your solution teaches kids that if they can't compromise their way out, they can't find an agreement, go ahead and just hit the other person if they don't do what you say.

My 3 year old has never been hit by me or my wife. Amazingly, we have taught her how to be polite, how to say thank you, and we allow her to make decisions. Sure, she doesn't do what we want all the time but she faces repercussions and consequences outside physical abuse. You can guide and direct desired behavior without the threat of hitting.

And if you develop a relationship with your kid, it won't come to locking them in their room if they don't accept grounding. You haven't done a good job as a parent building the groundwork for being a family. Parents and kids have to find teamwork to help each other get through life. I run my house like a team and everyone has a good relationship with each other. We don't need to hit each other.

Ghostbear1111 : I don't believe that all children are as well mannered as your daughter. Often a child needs to be taught how much being hit hurts, especially if they have a knack for hitting others. My gf is also very anti-spanking, but she works at a liberal jewish private school where most parents don't spank their child. She sees that those children love to misbehave for everyone because there is no punishment they fear.

Txgangsta : Wouldn't it be interesting if we all parented, your gf's school parents included, where kids are rewarded for good behavior instead of punished for bad behavior? We give attention, positive reinforcement, and encouragement to the good stuff. We ostracize for the bad stuff. Don't get me wrong, my kid learned to not walk in the street by me picking her up and holding her still whenever she walked in the street. She learned she would get an instant response, not fun, with a forceful back-up since I'm physically restraining her from doing what she wants. And then I don't respond and she has to wait until she is put back down.

It is a very physical response and violent, if you want to call it that. That's fair.

It's not striking. That's the difference.

Fun fact: My daughter hasn't walked into any street anywhere in the past two years. She figured out quickly that she got to do what she wanted as long as she didn't go in the street and we've applied that lesson to other behaviors as well. Consistent response to negative activity works when positive reinforce of good behavior fails.

It's called the "Video Game Death" way of teaching kids right and wrong. Again, restraint is forceful but it's not hitting.