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Would you marry a non-believer?
10-14-14 12:31 PM
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how important is it for you that your life partner shares your religious views. if they didn't would you want them to eventually start believing? if they were a different religion would you want them to convert to your religion? |
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10-14-14 01:21 PM
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a-sassy-black-lady : I am a Christian, and I.would marry someone who didn't, but I would try to make them convert, in til I drove them so crazy they did. |
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10-14-14 01:40 PM
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This is a really tricky subject because (for conservative Christians) there is a lot to consider in such a situation. Paul even advised that we not marry at all so that our full focus can be on God and not on an earthly spouse. That being said, when we do marry.... it is dangerous spiritually to marry someone and be unequally yoked. There are so many things to worry about. What are you bringing into your home and your life? How will your spouse's views affect your own? Will it draw you away from God, or cause you to be less close to God? There are also different rules of marriage for someone who is Christian and someone who is not, because one spouse is bound by God and the other isn't. Then again, the bible speaks about how one saved person in a household can be an umbrella for the others. It's tricky ground because we are so easily moved by our emotions and tend to keep our eyes on the things that bring us most happiness here on earth. However, if you truly love someone... and they aren't saved... I guess your decision to wed would be based on your convictions in Christ. If we pretend I was single and you were to ask me that question, I think my answer would be no. It'd be difficult for me to share my life (time, interests, activities, etc) with someone who didn't partake in my biggest passion. There are also different rules of marriage for someone who is Christian and someone who is not, because one spouse is bound by God and the other isn't. Then again, the bible speaks about how one saved person in a household can be an umbrella for the others. It's tricky ground because we are so easily moved by our emotions and tend to keep our eyes on the things that bring us most happiness here on earth. However, if you truly love someone... and they aren't saved... I guess your decision to wed would be based on your convictions in Christ. If we pretend I was single and you were to ask me that question, I think my answer would be no. It'd be difficult for me to share my life (time, interests, activities, etc) with someone who didn't partake in my biggest passion. |
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(edited by Singelli on 10-14-14 01:40 PM) Post Rating: 2 Liked By: drivethemfromourlands, RS_Chrisseh,
10-14-14 02:32 PM
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No offense to anyone. But based on the Bible and my faith and relationship with Christ. I could not do it. The Bible tells us not to marry non believers for they will turn your heart away from me. I value my relationship with Christ so I only date believers. As for having a significant other. Well If I could not convert them or win them to the Lord. I would end the relationship before it got to that point. I have had to do that in the past. I still kept the girl as a friend though. As for having a significant other. Well If I could not convert them or win them to the Lord. I would end the relationship before it got to that point. I have had to do that in the past. I still kept the girl as a friend though. |
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10-14-14 05:26 PM
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This is a no brainer. The answer is no, I wouldn't marry a non-believer. Bible indicates how marriage between a Man and a Woman is a relationship that goes both ways. Marriage is set as a small example of how Christ's relationship is to His Bride (the Church). Christ is the head of the church, so in the same way, the husband is the head of the family, both spiritually and responsibility, which is why wives are to submit to their husbands (Ephesians 5:22-33), just like how the Church submits to Christ. But in the same way, just as Christ loves the Church, the husband is commanded to love the wife. Even in the beginning in Genesis, the reason that God made Woman is because... “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” (Genesis 2:18) So the wife is also meant as a helper for the husband. Ultimately, when talking about spirituality and religious views, we are talking about worldview and truth. If you the two disagree on the basics of truth, there is no reason for the two to be together because 1. it's making the family on shaky ground. 2. It says that truth is not as important to them as their affection for one another, and 3. They can't help each other in a strong relationship. The husband can't be the head of the house spiritually and responsibility and the wife can't help the husband in forming a strong family. In the Bible, there is a specific descr So which one is more important to you? Truth or who you marry? Truth does help lead to the right person that you marry, but if you put more focus on what you think is the right person for you to marry, you are not putting focus on truth. Singelli : What verse is that? (The last one I mean.) “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” (Genesis 2:18) So the wife is also meant as a helper for the husband. Ultimately, when talking about spirituality and religious views, we are talking about worldview and truth. If you the two disagree on the basics of truth, there is no reason for the two to be together because 1. it's making the family on shaky ground. 2. It says that truth is not as important to them as their affection for one another, and 3. They can't help each other in a strong relationship. The husband can't be the head of the house spiritually and responsibility and the wife can't help the husband in forming a strong family. In the Bible, there is a specific descr So which one is more important to you? Truth or who you marry? Truth does help lead to the right person that you marry, but if you put more focus on what you think is the right person for you to marry, you are not putting focus on truth. Singelli : What verse is that? (The last one I mean.) |
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10-14-14 06:02 PM
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Singelli : Good reply, Singelli. Not many people remember to bring up the fact that Paul advised not marrying at all. It certainly would give a person more time and freedom to do absolutely anything God wished for them to do. Then again, he also thought that the second coming would be in their lifetimes and that the world would be ending soon anyway, so that could've had something to do with it also.
Interestingly, in Bible study we read through all of I Corinthians, including that "Do not be yoked together with unbelievers." part and surprisingly the context was not even about marriage; it was about teachers in the church. That said, I agree just from common sense that it'd be better for a Christian to marry another Christian. It just seems like there would be too many differences in opinion when your fundamental views of the universe aren't even the same. For me, that logic would hold true for followers of any religion honestly. Interestingly, in Bible study we read through all of I Corinthians, including that "Do not be yoked together with unbelievers." part and surprisingly the context was not even about marriage; it was about teachers in the church. That said, I agree just from common sense that it'd be better for a Christian to marry another Christian. It just seems like there would be too many differences in opinion when your fundamental views of the universe aren't even the same. For me, that logic would hold true for followers of any religion honestly. |
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10-16-14 10:29 PM
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a-sassy-black-lady : The question for me is not how important it is to me that my spouse be a believer as well. The real question is. How important is it to GOD? He warns us that we should not be unequally yoked. I cannot remember the verse now, as I am very tired and cannot seem to look it up in my concordance. But I will try to get back to you with all the specifics. |
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10-16-14 11:04 PM
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I'm Christian, and I can say that I would marry someone who doesn't share my beliefs. People are entitled to believe what they want to, and as long as they don't worship Satan or some crazy ish like that, I'd be completely fine with it. People can only change your views if you allow them |
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10-17-14 04:45 AM
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noahs_brother : You would be more likely to drive them so crazy that they want a divorce before you drove them so crazy they decide to convert. Driving people crazy is the worst way to bring someone into your religious view, as it just tends to drive the wedge even further. |
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12-08-14 05:23 PM
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Like marry a catholic? Or some ungodly babtist? Well maybe... If she was nice. |
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Honestly, yeah I would. One of the girls I liked (in 4th-6th grade) was Jewish, and I really didn't think of it. I am a Christan (pretty serious one at that) but I won't let that get in the way of me and my at the time significant other. However, I do understand the people in this thread (such as Tornadocam) who wouldn't. There are parts of the Christan faith that don't really favor other religions for partners. But honestly, as long as they don't get in your way with your relationship with God, I really wouldn't care. Also, to go against what Noah's brother said, it is never right to try and force a religion on someone. Just because be believe in a different (sometimes completely different faith) that doesn't mean you should take that away from them. To me that goes off as selfish, and I wouldn't be able to stand it if someone were to try and force it on me, so why do it to them. However, I do understand the people in this thread (such as Tornadocam) who wouldn't. There are parts of the Christan faith that don't really favor other religions for partners. But honestly, as long as they don't get in your way with your relationship with God, I really wouldn't care. Also, to go against what Noah's brother said, it is never right to try and force a religion on someone. Just because be believe in a different (sometimes completely different faith) that doesn't mean you should take that away from them. To me that goes off as selfish, and I wouldn't be able to stand it if someone were to try and force it on me, so why do it to them. |
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12-08-14 05:28 PM
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I can't really answer that, so I'll answer a similar question:
I am an atheist, well honestly, I literally do not care about religion. So, Would I marry someone who has religion as a big priority? I would, if I liked them. Just because their religion is different does that mean I won't marry the person I love? Of course not, that's the dumbest thing you can do. As long as my lack of religion doesn't anger, annoy or anything else, I don't see a problem. I am an atheist, well honestly, I literally do not care about religion. So, Would I marry someone who has religion as a big priority? I would, if I liked them. Just because their religion is different does that mean I won't marry the person I love? Of course not, that's the dumbest thing you can do. As long as my lack of religion doesn't anger, annoy or anything else, I don't see a problem. |
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I've always thought about what would happen if the situation arose. I think I could certainly date a non-believer, though it's never come up, but she would have to know how important my church life is to me. I just thing the line I couldn't draw (despite the scr |
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01-13-15 12:06 PM
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I really wouldn't, for so many reasons. . . . 1 Divided Children. If you were going to marry someone, and you really did believe the Bible is the truth, would you want your marriage partner to influence them in the other direction? The direction you have found to be false? It doesn't make sense to me, I mean, if you really did believe this stuff is the truth. . . . Then there are those who like religion because it's a tradition. They don't care so much whether it's correct or not. Or even believe that their religion is just that. Only a tradition. Vaguely close to the truth, which may not even be important to them. 2 Divided Parents. Ethical beliefs being different can cause stress between the two in a relationship, and keep them apart. Parents who are emotionally bound together in a loving way, as well as a mental manner will be much happier than those who are divided. The stress and division between the parents, which is already bad enough, then trickles down to the children. Affecting them in diverse ways. -- Even though I only listed two reasons, these are at the core of many problems children have growing up and can be linked to several. I know that there would be those who argue that they could make it work. And yes, sometimes it does. However, I would not deem it wise. Your emotions are something you can control. Even though it may seem hard. I would encourage people to think with their head regarding many topics as important as this. And even though Disney and a few movies seem to make it out as if there is only one person in the whole world who is compatible for you, that simply isn't true. It's a matter of compatibility, not finding your soul mate. Make the wiser decision, and you'll be a lot happier. I really wouldn't, for so many reasons. . . . 1 Divided Children. If you were going to marry someone, and you really did believe the Bible is the truth, would you want your marriage partner to influence them in the other direction? The direction you have found to be false? It doesn't make sense to me, I mean, if you really did believe this stuff is the truth. . . . Then there are those who like religion because it's a tradition. They don't care so much whether it's correct or not. Or even believe that their religion is just that. Only a tradition. Vaguely close to the truth, which may not even be important to them. 2 Divided Parents. Ethical beliefs being different can cause stress between the two in a relationship, and keep them apart. Parents who are emotionally bound together in a loving way, as well as a mental manner will be much happier than those who are divided. The stress and division between the parents, which is already bad enough, then trickles down to the children. Affecting them in diverse ways. -- Even though I only listed two reasons, these are at the core of many problems children have growing up and can be linked to several. I know that there would be those who argue that they could make it work. And yes, sometimes it does. However, I would not deem it wise. Your emotions are something you can control. Even though it may seem hard. I would encourage people to think with their head regarding many topics as important as this. And even though Disney and a few movies seem to make it out as if there is only one person in the whole world who is compatible for you, that simply isn't true. It's a matter of compatibility, not finding your soul mate. Make the wiser decision, and you'll be a lot happier. |
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Not going to lie, I've been trying to figure out how to respond to this question for awhile, and still I don't have an answer. In one way, I've dated guys who were non-believers in the past, and we almost always split because of that divide where I wanted to go deeper in my relationship with Christ, and they couldn't understand. I, personally, have never dated a man who believed in God, but I also have been in the dating circle since 2011. ;P(I really started following God again in 2012). In another way, which is something I've had to sit on for a long while, I can't see myself being in a relationship with a non-believer ever again, and not just because of my past relationships. There are a couple reasons. The first,was when I was at a Discipleship school the last year. I met these amazing guys who were chasing after God with all there being and it was one of the most beautiful things I had ever seen. To watch someone chase after God's heart with such passion...yeah let's just say that was the absolute for me in that I could never date or marry a non-believer. Especially with how those guy at my school treated all of us ladies in the school with such respect and like we were Queens. The second, was that I looked at my own parents relationship. My parents married after I was born, both believed in Christ, but my dad carried(and still does carry) a lot of hurt in his heart, and because of that he didn't follow Christ and made a lot of poor decisions. My mom carrying hurt too, but at least she had a relationship with Christ. My parents divorced when I was six, because my dad was cheating on my mom yet again. The strain it put on my brother and I was really hard, and I mean really hard. The reason for the divorce was because my dad didn't know how to be faithful to my mom. The bigger reason though, one that neither will talk about, but I know, is because of their difference in opinions in regards to Christ. The third, was because after I looked at my parents relationship, I looked to the relationships that I look up to. My Aunt and Uncle, the Discipleship school heads, my spiritual mother and her husband. They each had something that made their relationship work, and that was that Christ was at the center of that relationship. And fourth, and the most important is that it says not to in the Bible. ;P In one way, I've dated guys who were non-believers in the past, and we almost always split because of that divide where I wanted to go deeper in my relationship with Christ, and they couldn't understand. I, personally, have never dated a man who believed in God, but I also have been in the dating circle since 2011. ;P(I really started following God again in 2012). In another way, which is something I've had to sit on for a long while, I can't see myself being in a relationship with a non-believer ever again, and not just because of my past relationships. There are a couple reasons. The first,was when I was at a Discipleship school the last year. I met these amazing guys who were chasing after God with all there being and it was one of the most beautiful things I had ever seen. To watch someone chase after God's heart with such passion...yeah let's just say that was the absolute for me in that I could never date or marry a non-believer. Especially with how those guy at my school treated all of us ladies in the school with such respect and like we were Queens. The second, was that I looked at my own parents relationship. My parents married after I was born, both believed in Christ, but my dad carried(and still does carry) a lot of hurt in his heart, and because of that he didn't follow Christ and made a lot of poor decisions. My mom carrying hurt too, but at least she had a relationship with Christ. My parents divorced when I was six, because my dad was cheating on my mom yet again. The strain it put on my brother and I was really hard, and I mean really hard. The reason for the divorce was because my dad didn't know how to be faithful to my mom. The bigger reason though, one that neither will talk about, but I know, is because of their difference in opinions in regards to Christ. The third, was because after I looked at my parents relationship, I looked to the relationships that I look up to. My Aunt and Uncle, the Discipleship school heads, my spiritual mother and her husband. They each had something that made their relationship work, and that was that Christ was at the center of that relationship. And fourth, and the most important is that it says not to in the Bible. ;P |
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01-18-15 05:22 AM
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(edited by play4fun on 01-18-15 07:19 AM)
01-18-15 06:59 AM
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stankp****2 : Now while I disagree with the actual statement, I fall in line with the ideology behind the big body parts quote. I'm not exceptionally religious and I don't believe one thing is more correct than any other. People can believe what they want and their realities are different from mine. Who am I to criticize another person's believes? If they're marrying me and I believe in what I believe in, and they don't try to change that, why should I change their believe system for me? Anyway, if a girl has nice attributes and I love her, I'd marry her. My wife is Lutheran, I don't know which synod, and I consider myself Catholic. Amazingly, things work perfectly because religion doesn't really come into the picture. We have a 1 year old daughter and we're going to give her the option to figure out what she likes. I'll say, "This is what my people do," my wife will say, "This is what we do," and we'll both say, "This is what other people do. What do you like?" And we go from there. I'm not exceptionally religious and I don't believe one thing is more correct than any other. People can believe what they want and their realities are different from mine. Who am I to criticize another person's believes? If they're marrying me and I believe in what I believe in, and they don't try to change that, why should I change their believe system for me? Anyway, if a girl has nice attributes and I love her, I'd marry her. My wife is Lutheran, I don't know which synod, and I consider myself Catholic. Amazingly, things work perfectly because religion doesn't really come into the picture. We have a 1 year old daughter and we're going to give her the option to figure out what she likes. I'll say, "This is what my people do," my wife will say, "This is what we do," and we'll both say, "This is what other people do. What do you like?" And we go from there. |
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01-18-15 10:29 AM
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(edited by play4fun on 01-18-15 11:38 AM)
01-23-15 09:55 AM
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Absolutely. I'm not just talking about non-Christians - I'm talking about people who don't believe in my religion, too. I would not want or try to change my lover's beliefs for me; I love people for their dedication to others, not their view on life. I am not that religious, but I believe that God is love, and if God is love, then I will love anyone, regardless of their beliefs, as long as they love me back and are good-hearted people who try to make others happy. The willingness to spread joy and put smiles on other people's faces is the attribute I find the most attractive and promising in other people. If their beliefs differ from mine, it is not my position to judge or try to change them to fit mine. As long they are kind and loving, I would have no problem with them whatsoever. Kindness and love in another person is all I need another person to have in common with me for me to at least consider marriage. I don't care whether their God has a different name from mine. I don't care whether they think certain things I'm fine with are bad or immoral. As for the children? The religion I find the most in line with my views on life, despite not being my official one, is Christianity, so I'd probably be most eager to raise them as Christians, but if they choose otherwise, I would gladly let them believe in whatever they want to believe. Just like my partner, all I need them to do is love for me to love them back. Now, back to the marriage. My conclusion? All I care about is their ability to love. That's enough for me. That's what defines a person for me. I'm not just talking about non-Christians - I'm talking about people who don't believe in my religion, too. I would not want or try to change my lover's beliefs for me; I love people for their dedication to others, not their view on life. I am not that religious, but I believe that God is love, and if God is love, then I will love anyone, regardless of their beliefs, as long as they love me back and are good-hearted people who try to make others happy. The willingness to spread joy and put smiles on other people's faces is the attribute I find the most attractive and promising in other people. If their beliefs differ from mine, it is not my position to judge or try to change them to fit mine. As long they are kind and loving, I would have no problem with them whatsoever. Kindness and love in another person is all I need another person to have in common with me for me to at least consider marriage. I don't care whether their God has a different name from mine. I don't care whether they think certain things I'm fine with are bad or immoral. As for the children? The religion I find the most in line with my views on life, despite not being my official one, is Christianity, so I'd probably be most eager to raise them as Christians, but if they choose otherwise, I would gladly let them believe in whatever they want to believe. Just like my partner, all I need them to do is love for me to love them back. Now, back to the marriage. My conclusion? All I care about is their ability to love. That's enough for me. That's what defines a person for me. |
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(edited by NintendoFanKimmy on 01-23-15 10:00 AM)
01-25-15 03:47 AM
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I would, if she lets me, and I love her, I would.
Now, if she wouldn't let me believe, then I would not. Now, children? I would like them to have my religion, but other then that I would. Now, if she wouldn't let me believe, then I would not. Now, children? I would like them to have my religion, but other then that I would. |
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