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01-19-14 11:26 PM
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The Awakening of a New Soldier (Chapter 7)

 

01-19-14 11:26 PM
Mohammedroxx3 is Offline
| ID: 964460 | 2026 Words

Mohammedroxx3
mohammedroxx3
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CP: 37422.8
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Likes: 1  Dislikes: 0
Alright. Hey guys, so the time of the day once again has come for me to continue typing a bit more of my story. Also, one thing I would like to say is that I have gotten some constructive advice so I will (try my best) to implement it. So this time, I'll try not to forget to turn off my layout and put some spacing in the chapters. Hopefully I don't mess up because if I do, I won't be able to edit it because the question mark diamonds stuff will pop up everywhere and ruin the post. Sadly, especially for big posts. Anyways, please remember to read the previous chapters first in order before moving on:

The Prologue of this story can be found here: https://www.vizzed.com/boards/thread.php?id=71309
Chapters 1-3 of this story can be found here: https://www.vizzed.com/boards/thread.php?id=71409
Chapters 4-5 of this story can be found here: https://www.vizzed.com/boards/thread.php?id=71449
And last but not least, Chapter 6 can be found found here: https://www.vizzed.com/boards/thread.php?id=71489

And that is all you need to read. Afterwards, feel free to move on. Anyways, let us continue on the with story!

Chapter 7: Entering The Vent

Tom and Bob got out of the stalls. They now went under the vent. They both stood there and started staring at the vent for quite a few minutes. It was as if the vent was talking to them. The Vent was encouraging and yet discouraging Tom and Bob to attempt their plans. They did not know or understand this strange sightings. It was as if they almost fell in another trance just like how Tom fell in a trance when he was staring at his mirror at home once in a midnight. The Vent whispered in their ears in a man's voice, "Tom and Bob, come in already. You must know what can be awaiting you before it is too late." Then the Vent whispered again but in a girl's voice, "Tom and Bob. Please don't do your plans. Just leave this bathroom. You do not want to risk ruining your life early. You do not want to end your happiness too fast. Please, enjoy your last few happy days as best friends with their own happy family before it is too late. Just go. Go!!!" Then the Vent whispered yet again in the same man voice, "No. You 2 must go in and enter me. Now! You must turn things around and know what is awaiting you before you are too late for your own happiness. For your own family and friends. For your own current happy life. For the sake of your best friends and your happy everyday life with them. You must... Not let everything in your life... Separate." Tom and Bob then looked at each other for a moment, then they looked right back at the vent. The Vent continued in it's man voice, "Enter! Now! Nowww!!!!" Then the voice slowly faded away and it got quite again.

Tom then said to Bob, "I fell back into another trance like that happened to me once before. How about you Bob?" Bob then said, "Yea. I am pretty sure that this vent is really trying to let us know something. In fact, I fell in a trance while I was staring at the mirror in my own bathroom at home once at midnight." Tom then looked at Bob insanely for a few moments and he was in shock. Tom then said while trembling, "Dang... Same exact thing happened to me... No joke man. That is insane. I thought it was just a dream but their is something that is really trying to let us do... something. Especially if it specifically happens to the both of us at the same exact time. Now we must start our plan!" Bob then said, "Alright. Lets do this thing man!"

Tom went and stood right under the vent and said to Bob, "Okay Bob, now, I need a little boost up right into the vent somehow. Is it possible and you can carry me and push me up to the vent? Or somehow just toss me up there? I will try to climb up while you push me up to the vent. Alright?" Bob said in an unsure voice, "Uhh... I don't know. I'm not sure if I am actually strong enough to do this man... However, I will try my best Tom. We can not fail." Bob then grabs Tom by his shoulders and says, "Okay Tom. Try climbing up the corner and enter the vent. I will attempt to push you up that vent with all of my strength. I hope this works out well." Tom said, "Okay. Start pushing me up." Tom then grabs on the wall and attempts to climb. Bob then pushes Tom upward to the vent. Tom then suddenly slips off the wall and falls on Bob. Bob catches Tom and Tom said, "Holy... Oh boy. That was a close one. I could have smashed my head on the ground. This is a lot harder than expected. The walls are way too smooth and wet. It is almost impossible to climb. But we have no other choice. Lets try this again and again until we get to the vent." Bob then said, "There must be another way man." Tom then said, "Come on. It's our only way. Now, give me a little boost up." Bob then grabs Tom the shoulders again and starts pushing him up. Tom attempts to climb. Tom is getting very close to the vent. He is only 4 feet away for the vent. He is 3 feet, 2 feet away, he is almost there! Then Tom's left arm that is usually weaker than his right arms slips, thus Tom falling back down onto Bob. Bob catches him again but he almost slipped on the floor this time and Bob yelled but recovered himself before he slipped on the floor. Tom then said, "Oh boy... This is a lot harder than I thought man. How is this thing gonna work out man? Is there any other possibly option we can do?" 

Bob stood silent and started to think. Tom ran around the bathroom looking for any possibly thing to get up to the vent. Tom was beginning to lose hope and he started playing with his fingers with a big frown on his face. Bob then said, "Hmm... Maybe there can be something we can stand on and then it can boost us up to climb up to the vent?" Tom then said, "Thats a good idea but... Where can we find something to stand on?" Bob then said, "Instead of me carrying you, you can grab onto the wall and climb up on me and then stand on my shoulders as a small boost up and then climb into the vent." Tom then said, "Okay. Though I am a little afraid of actually losing balance and falling down." Bob then said, "Well, as you have kept on telling me, it is our only choice. Uhh right?" Tom then said, "Alright, I'll try." Tom then jumped onto Bob like a piggy back ride and then he slowly climbed up on Bob and eventually reached for his shoulders. Tom put his right foot and Bob's right shoulder and stood up then put his left foot on Bob's left shoulder. Now Tom was standing on Bob's shoulder and he was leaning against the wall in extreme fear. He was trembling. Bob then said, "Come on. Almost there man. Grab onto the edge of the vent and pull yourself up!" Tom said, "Okay, I'm trying. Not as easy as you think. Ehh..." Tom grabbed and put both of his hands onto the edge of the vent. Tom now had a very strong grip on the edge of the vent and he was preparing himself to do a very hard pull-up to the vent. He now was trying to pull himself up. He pulled himself up very hard and his face has turned completely red from how hard he was pulling himself up. He then realized that he finally made it. He just realized that he was actually sitting on the edge of the vent. Bob was looking up at him and smiling and he said, "Well, looks like you made it!"

Tom then said, "Whoaa.. phew." He continued to breath fast and hard then after about 2 minutes, he said, "Ugh. That was hard. Now, how are we gonna bring you up Bob?" Bob then said, "Uhh... I guess you can put out your arms so I can grab onto your hands. And maybe you will try to pull me up while I climb with my 2 feet up the wall and hopefully I end up in the vent with you." Tom said, "Oh... my... What if I fall down and out of the vent if you were to pull me down too hard?" Bob then paused for a moment and then he said, "Wait... Are you kidding?" Tom said, "What?" Bob then pointed to the left corner of the bathroom. And there was a small plastic chair on the floor. Tom then put both of his hands on his face and said, "Or... I could have just used that chair to get up to the vent. I wish I saw that chair earlier. Oh well. Anyways, get the chair Bob and that should help you climb up into the vent." Bob then went to get the chair, he then carried it and put it right under the vent, then he stood on top of the chair and he got a grip on the edge of the vent. Bob then attempted to pull himself up. Bob's face went red at the first 3 seconds of the pull-up already. Tom then grabbed Bob and continued to try to help pull him up. Within a few minutes, Bob has finally made it up on to the vent with Tom. They both looked at each then smiled and  laughed. They were both relieved and extremely surprised that they were even able to make it on to the vent.

Bob then said while breathing fast and heavily, "ugh... ugh.. Phew. Finally. Now, here is a question that just came into mind. How are we supposed to know which direction are we gonna go in the vent?" Tom then looked at Bob for a few moments then he looked down. He stood silent for a few moments again. He then said, "Hmm... I wish I thought of that... Well, I guess we must keep going at any direction until we happen to find a classroom full to teachers having a meeting. Afterwards, you will turn on your Iphone and start recording what they say and we will listen. I honestly don't know how the navigation through the vent will work out or if it will even work out at all but we have no other choice but to try or else we may be stuck here for quite a while." Bob then said, "Sheesh. and are we really gonna keep doing this everyday? I mean, this is way too hardcore man. You expect me to keep on doing this?" Tom then said, "heh. Hush up man. No reason to complain. Trust me Bob, once we do it correctly the first time, we will eventually be able to do this everyday until we really find out what they are planning. And what if they are planning something life risking for us students?" Bob said, "Ehh... Err. Fine. Lets get moving through the vent."

Will they manage to navigate through the vent to the correct room? Will they be able to hear the teachers' plans? What can they actually be possibly planning? Is it indeed life risking for the students? Stay tuned in the next chapter of this story!

That is about it for the chapter. I hope I was able to make it better than the last one. I tried dividing it into some paragraphs instead of having one gigantic paragraph. Any feedback will be appreciated. Thank you for reading if you actually bothered to read it! XD
Alright. Hey guys, so the time of the day once again has come for me to continue typing a bit more of my story. Also, one thing I would like to say is that I have gotten some constructive advice so I will (try my best) to implement it. So this time, I'll try not to forget to turn off my layout and put some spacing in the chapters. Hopefully I don't mess up because if I do, I won't be able to edit it because the question mark diamonds stuff will pop up everywhere and ruin the post. Sadly, especially for big posts. Anyways, please remember to read the previous chapters first in order before moving on:

The Prologue of this story can be found here: https://www.vizzed.com/boards/thread.php?id=71309
Chapters 1-3 of this story can be found here: https://www.vizzed.com/boards/thread.php?id=71409
Chapters 4-5 of this story can be found here: https://www.vizzed.com/boards/thread.php?id=71449
And last but not least, Chapter 6 can be found found here: https://www.vizzed.com/boards/thread.php?id=71489

And that is all you need to read. Afterwards, feel free to move on. Anyways, let us continue on the with story!

Chapter 7: Entering The Vent

Tom and Bob got out of the stalls. They now went under the vent. They both stood there and started staring at the vent for quite a few minutes. It was as if the vent was talking to them. The Vent was encouraging and yet discouraging Tom and Bob to attempt their plans. They did not know or understand this strange sightings. It was as if they almost fell in another trance just like how Tom fell in a trance when he was staring at his mirror at home once in a midnight. The Vent whispered in their ears in a man's voice, "Tom and Bob, come in already. You must know what can be awaiting you before it is too late." Then the Vent whispered again but in a girl's voice, "Tom and Bob. Please don't do your plans. Just leave this bathroom. You do not want to risk ruining your life early. You do not want to end your happiness too fast. Please, enjoy your last few happy days as best friends with their own happy family before it is too late. Just go. Go!!!" Then the Vent whispered yet again in the same man voice, "No. You 2 must go in and enter me. Now! You must turn things around and know what is awaiting you before you are too late for your own happiness. For your own family and friends. For your own current happy life. For the sake of your best friends and your happy everyday life with them. You must... Not let everything in your life... Separate." Tom and Bob then looked at each other for a moment, then they looked right back at the vent. The Vent continued in it's man voice, "Enter! Now! Nowww!!!!" Then the voice slowly faded away and it got quite again.

Tom then said to Bob, "I fell back into another trance like that happened to me once before. How about you Bob?" Bob then said, "Yea. I am pretty sure that this vent is really trying to let us know something. In fact, I fell in a trance while I was staring at the mirror in my own bathroom at home once at midnight." Tom then looked at Bob insanely for a few moments and he was in shock. Tom then said while trembling, "Dang... Same exact thing happened to me... No joke man. That is insane. I thought it was just a dream but their is something that is really trying to let us do... something. Especially if it specifically happens to the both of us at the same exact time. Now we must start our plan!" Bob then said, "Alright. Lets do this thing man!"

Tom went and stood right under the vent and said to Bob, "Okay Bob, now, I need a little boost up right into the vent somehow. Is it possible and you can carry me and push me up to the vent? Or somehow just toss me up there? I will try to climb up while you push me up to the vent. Alright?" Bob said in an unsure voice, "Uhh... I don't know. I'm not sure if I am actually strong enough to do this man... However, I will try my best Tom. We can not fail." Bob then grabs Tom by his shoulders and says, "Okay Tom. Try climbing up the corner and enter the vent. I will attempt to push you up that vent with all of my strength. I hope this works out well." Tom said, "Okay. Start pushing me up." Tom then grabs on the wall and attempts to climb. Bob then pushes Tom upward to the vent. Tom then suddenly slips off the wall and falls on Bob. Bob catches Tom and Tom said, "Holy... Oh boy. That was a close one. I could have smashed my head on the ground. This is a lot harder than expected. The walls are way too smooth and wet. It is almost impossible to climb. But we have no other choice. Lets try this again and again until we get to the vent." Bob then said, "There must be another way man." Tom then said, "Come on. It's our only way. Now, give me a little boost up." Bob then grabs Tom the shoulders again and starts pushing him up. Tom attempts to climb. Tom is getting very close to the vent. He is only 4 feet away for the vent. He is 3 feet, 2 feet away, he is almost there! Then Tom's left arm that is usually weaker than his right arms slips, thus Tom falling back down onto Bob. Bob catches him again but he almost slipped on the floor this time and Bob yelled but recovered himself before he slipped on the floor. Tom then said, "Oh boy... This is a lot harder than I thought man. How is this thing gonna work out man? Is there any other possibly option we can do?" 

Bob stood silent and started to think. Tom ran around the bathroom looking for any possibly thing to get up to the vent. Tom was beginning to lose hope and he started playing with his fingers with a big frown on his face. Bob then said, "Hmm... Maybe there can be something we can stand on and then it can boost us up to climb up to the vent?" Tom then said, "Thats a good idea but... Where can we find something to stand on?" Bob then said, "Instead of me carrying you, you can grab onto the wall and climb up on me and then stand on my shoulders as a small boost up and then climb into the vent." Tom then said, "Okay. Though I am a little afraid of actually losing balance and falling down." Bob then said, "Well, as you have kept on telling me, it is our only choice. Uhh right?" Tom then said, "Alright, I'll try." Tom then jumped onto Bob like a piggy back ride and then he slowly climbed up on Bob and eventually reached for his shoulders. Tom put his right foot and Bob's right shoulder and stood up then put his left foot on Bob's left shoulder. Now Tom was standing on Bob's shoulder and he was leaning against the wall in extreme fear. He was trembling. Bob then said, "Come on. Almost there man. Grab onto the edge of the vent and pull yourself up!" Tom said, "Okay, I'm trying. Not as easy as you think. Ehh..." Tom grabbed and put both of his hands onto the edge of the vent. Tom now had a very strong grip on the edge of the vent and he was preparing himself to do a very hard pull-up to the vent. He now was trying to pull himself up. He pulled himself up very hard and his face has turned completely red from how hard he was pulling himself up. He then realized that he finally made it. He just realized that he was actually sitting on the edge of the vent. Bob was looking up at him and smiling and he said, "Well, looks like you made it!"

Tom then said, "Whoaa.. phew." He continued to breath fast and hard then after about 2 minutes, he said, "Ugh. That was hard. Now, how are we gonna bring you up Bob?" Bob then said, "Uhh... I guess you can put out your arms so I can grab onto your hands. And maybe you will try to pull me up while I climb with my 2 feet up the wall and hopefully I end up in the vent with you." Tom said, "Oh... my... What if I fall down and out of the vent if you were to pull me down too hard?" Bob then paused for a moment and then he said, "Wait... Are you kidding?" Tom said, "What?" Bob then pointed to the left corner of the bathroom. And there was a small plastic chair on the floor. Tom then put both of his hands on his face and said, "Or... I could have just used that chair to get up to the vent. I wish I saw that chair earlier. Oh well. Anyways, get the chair Bob and that should help you climb up into the vent." Bob then went to get the chair, he then carried it and put it right under the vent, then he stood on top of the chair and he got a grip on the edge of the vent. Bob then attempted to pull himself up. Bob's face went red at the first 3 seconds of the pull-up already. Tom then grabbed Bob and continued to try to help pull him up. Within a few minutes, Bob has finally made it up on to the vent with Tom. They both looked at each then smiled and  laughed. They were both relieved and extremely surprised that they were even able to make it on to the vent.

Bob then said while breathing fast and heavily, "ugh... ugh.. Phew. Finally. Now, here is a question that just came into mind. How are we supposed to know which direction are we gonna go in the vent?" Tom then looked at Bob for a few moments then he looked down. He stood silent for a few moments again. He then said, "Hmm... I wish I thought of that... Well, I guess we must keep going at any direction until we happen to find a classroom full to teachers having a meeting. Afterwards, you will turn on your Iphone and start recording what they say and we will listen. I honestly don't know how the navigation through the vent will work out or if it will even work out at all but we have no other choice but to try or else we may be stuck here for quite a while." Bob then said, "Sheesh. and are we really gonna keep doing this everyday? I mean, this is way too hardcore man. You expect me to keep on doing this?" Tom then said, "heh. Hush up man. No reason to complain. Trust me Bob, once we do it correctly the first time, we will eventually be able to do this everyday until we really find out what they are planning. And what if they are planning something life risking for us students?" Bob said, "Ehh... Err. Fine. Lets get moving through the vent."

Will they manage to navigate through the vent to the correct room? Will they be able to hear the teachers' plans? What can they actually be possibly planning? Is it indeed life risking for the students? Stay tuned in the next chapter of this story!

That is about it for the chapter. I hope I was able to make it better than the last one. I tried dividing it into some paragraphs instead of having one gigantic paragraph. Any feedback will be appreciated. Thank you for reading if you actually bothered to read it! XD
Vizzed Elite

Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'

Registered: 03-03-13
Location: Earth?
Last Post: 1132 days
Last Active: 1021 days

Post Rating: 1   Liked By: SacredShadow,

01-20-14 10:30 AM
Frodlex is Offline
| ID: 964644 | 126 Words

Frodlex
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POSTS: 753/1680
POST EXP: 161649
LVL EXP: 4861249
CP: 10857.4
VIZ: 2738

Likes: 0  Dislikes: 0
This is much better than the last one. It could still use some work and improvement towards proper spacing, it's honestly a pretty complex concept if you are jumping into it head on. Your dialog is still being done wrong to mostly pinpoint where it is. and if you want some help I would gladly offer it. But I would recommend trying Google for a place to teach you proper spacing or again, PM me and I can do what I can to point you in the best direction but still, improvement is improvement and that is potentially enough to satisfy you and your readers for the most part. You can never be too sure though based on who is reading it and who is not.
This is much better than the last one. It could still use some work and improvement towards proper spacing, it's honestly a pretty complex concept if you are jumping into it head on. Your dialog is still being done wrong to mostly pinpoint where it is. and if you want some help I would gladly offer it. But I would recommend trying Google for a place to teach you proper spacing or again, PM me and I can do what I can to point you in the best direction but still, improvement is improvement and that is potentially enough to satisfy you and your readers for the most part. You can never be too sure though based on who is reading it and who is not.
Vizzed Elite
<img src=http://i.imgur.com/1nAsCWD.gif> <font color=


Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'

Registered: 09-14-10
Last Post: 506 days
Last Active: 419 days

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