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11-19-13 05:04 PM
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The Incredibly Bad Joke Thread

 

11-19-13 05:04 PM
Surgiac is Offline
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Here it is, ladies & gentlemen! It's The Incredibly Bad Joke Thread! I'll start by telling the first bad joke. Your answer should be posted with spoiler tags. 


What do you call a fish with no eyes? 

Spoiler:
A fsh.
 
Here it is, ladies & gentlemen! It's The Incredibly Bad Joke Thread! I'll start by telling the first bad joke. Your answer should be posted with spoiler tags. 


What do you call a fish with no eyes? 

Spoiler:
A fsh.
 
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11-19-13 05:09 PM
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What do you get when you put root beer in a square cup?

Spoiler:
Beer.


This is a math joke, for those that don't quite get it yet.
What do you get when you put root beer in a square cup?

Spoiler:
Beer.


This is a math joke, for those that don't quite get it yet.
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11-19-13 05:18 PM
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Do you know that happens when you throw a red rock into the blue sea?

Spoiler:
It gets wet
Do you know that happens when you throw a red rock into the blue sea?

Spoiler:
It gets wet
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11-19-13 05:34 PM
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What do you call a member on vizzed with sprinkles?  
Spoiler:
A trusted member.
What do you call a member on vizzed with sprinkles?  
Spoiler:
A trusted member.
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11-20-13 07:53 PM
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mohammedroxx3 :   Dissapointing.
What do you call a drunk monkey?
Spoiler:
A dead monkey
mohammedroxx3 :   Dissapointing.
What do you call a drunk monkey?
Spoiler:
A dead monkey
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11-20-13 08:09 PM
Surgiac is Offline
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Barathemos : It is an incredibly bad joke thread after all....



Why did Miss Issippi want to wear Ms Ouri's New Jersey?

Spoiler:
I don't know. Alaska.
Barathemos : It is an incredibly bad joke thread after all....



Why did Miss Issippi want to wear Ms Ouri's New Jersey?

Spoiler:
I don't know. Alaska.
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(edited by Surgiac on 05-01-14 06:19 PM)     Post Rating: 5   Liked By: Barathemos, Chindogu, Mohammedroxx3, sloanstar1000, supernerd117,

11-21-13 06:53 PM
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Why are unfunny jokes so funny?

What is orange and sounds like a parrot?

Spoiler:
a carrot
Why are unfunny jokes so funny?

What is orange and sounds like a parrot?

Spoiler:
a carrot
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(edited by sloanstar1000 on 11-21-13 06:58 PM)     Post Rating: 3   Liked By: patar4097, sillysoul, supernerd117,

11-21-13 07:01 PM
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sloanstar1000 : That's probably the worst joke I've ever seen....and I laughed a lot.....


What's brown and sticky?



Spoiler:
A stick
sloanstar1000 : That's probably the worst joke I've ever seen....and I laughed a lot.....


What's brown and sticky?



Spoiler:
A stick
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(edited by patar4097 on 11-21-13 07:02 PM)     Post Rating: 2   Liked By: sloanstar1000, supernerd117,

11-22-13 04:07 PM
DrakPokeMaster is Offline
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Sticks can be gray too  

What is what is hard and sounds like a cherry?

Spoiler:
A chair
Sticks can be gray too  

What is what is hard and sounds like a cherry?

Spoiler:
A chair
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11-22-13 05:26 PM
Surgiac is Offline
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Wow. Just wow. All of these jokes exceed my expectations of being bad. 


What is a witch's favorite food?
Spoiler:
A Halloweenie
Wow. Just wow. All of these jokes exceed my expectations of being bad. 


What is a witch's favorite food?
Spoiler:
A Halloweenie
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11-22-13 10:14 PM
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Surgiac : Oh I have loads of horrible jokes,

***FACEPALM DISCLAIMER***

What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Spoiler:
at tooth hurty


How do you know it's a pirate movie?

Spoiler:
If it's rated AAARRRR


Why did the coffee taste like mud?

Spoiler:
well, it was ground just a minute ago


How did they find the run away dalmation?

Spoiler:
it was spotted only two blocks away




Surgiac : Oh I have loads of horrible jokes,

***FACEPALM DISCLAIMER***

What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Spoiler:
at tooth hurty


How do you know it's a pirate movie?

Spoiler:
If it's rated AAARRRR


Why did the coffee taste like mud?

Spoiler:
well, it was ground just a minute ago


How did they find the run away dalmation?

Spoiler:
it was spotted only two blocks away




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(edited by sloanstar1000 on 11-22-13 10:15 PM)     Post Rating: 1   Liked By: Surgiac,

11-22-13 10:21 PM
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Alright, just imagine a "Ba-Dum-Tsh" after all of theses, alright?

What did one cow say to another?
Spoiler:
Do you want to go to the moooooooooovies?


Why did the turkey crossed the road?
Spoiler:
To prove he was not chicken


What do you call a guy with no left arm or leg?
Spoiler:
All right now!


Not sure if those count as bad jokes, but they actually make me groan a bit after reading them.
Alright, just imagine a "Ba-Dum-Tsh" after all of theses, alright?

What did one cow say to another?
Spoiler:
Do you want to go to the moooooooooovies?


Why did the turkey crossed the road?
Spoiler:
To prove he was not chicken


What do you call a guy with no left arm or leg?
Spoiler:
All right now!


Not sure if those count as bad jokes, but they actually make me groan a bit after reading them.
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11-22-13 10:28 PM
Surgiac is Offline
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I may actually use some of these jokes. 


What do you call an alligator in a vest? 

Spoiler:
An investigator
I may actually use some of these jokes. 


What do you call an alligator in a vest? 

Spoiler:
An investigator
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11-25-13 06:24 PM
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What do you call an Alligator covered in chocolate (you probably already guessed it...)

Spoiler:
A chocodile

What do you call an Alligator covered in chocolate (you probably already guessed it...)

Spoiler:
A chocodile

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12-14-13 03:48 AM
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why did the elephant cross the road?

Spoiler:
because the jokes so old the chicken retired.
why did the elephant cross the road?

Spoiler:
because the jokes so old the chicken retired.
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01-03-14 09:46 PM
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How old is the world?
Spoiler:
old
How old is the world?
Spoiler:
old
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01-30-14 12:43 PM
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I have 3 jokes I wish to share.

How do you get Pikachu on a bus?
Spoiler:
You Poke-him-On


Can a match box?
Spoiler:
No, but a tin can!


Waiter! Waiter! there's a shoe in my soup!
Spoiler:
Yes, it gives the flavours an extra kick


I know how rubbish they are but hey, this is a bad joke thread, they're supposed to be rubbish! Hope you liked them anyway!
I have 3 jokes I wish to share.

How do you get Pikachu on a bus?
Spoiler:
You Poke-him-On


Can a match box?
Spoiler:
No, but a tin can!


Waiter! Waiter! there's a shoe in my soup!
Spoiler:
Yes, it gives the flavours an extra kick


I know how rubbish they are but hey, this is a bad joke thread, they're supposed to be rubbish! Hope you liked them anyway!
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01-30-14 06:47 PM
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Why did the sheep get grounded?
Spoiler:
Because he was being baaaaaaaaaad.
Why did the sheep get grounded?
Spoiler:
Because he was being baaaaaaaaaad.
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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?
Spoiler:
"Where's my tractor?"
What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?
Spoiler:
"Where's my tractor?"
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tgags123 : That was definitely the one I laughed at the most. lololol!!!!!

Hmm, I should share a few.

Who can shave 25 times a day and still have a beard?
Spoiler:
A barber


What's stucco?
Spoiler:
What happens when you step in bubblegummo.


A man was waiting for his wife to give birth. The doctor came and informed the dad that his son was born without a torso, arms, or legs. The son was just a head!

But the dad loved his son and raised him as well as he could. Eighteen years later, the son was old enough for his first drink. The dad took him to a bar, tearfully told him he was proud of him, and ordered the biggest, strongest drink for his boy. With all the bar patrons looking on curiously, the boy took his first sip of alcohol.

Swoooop! A torso popped out!

The bar was dead silent, then burst into a whoop of joy. The father, shocked, begged his son to drink again. The patrons chanted, "Take another drink! Take another drink!" The bartender shook his head in dismay.

Swoooop! Two arms popped out!

The bar went wild. The father, crying and wailing, begged his son to drink again. The patrons chanted, "Take another drink! Take another drink!" But the bartender ignored the whole affair.

By this time, the boy was getting tipsy. With his new hands, he reached down, grabbed the drink, and guzzled the last of it.

Swoooop! Two legs popped out.

The bar was in chaos. The father wept with joy. The boy stood up on his new legs. He stumbled to the left. He stumbled to the right. Then he stumbled through the front door and into the street, where a truck ran him over.

The bar fell silent. The father moaned with grief. The bartender merely sighed and said, "He should have quit while he was a head."

Local Mods : Please ignore word count for this post. It's copy/paste.
tgags123 : That was definitely the one I laughed at the most. lololol!!!!!

Hmm, I should share a few.

Who can shave 25 times a day and still have a beard?
Spoiler:
A barber


What's stucco?
Spoiler:
What happens when you step in bubblegummo.


A man was waiting for his wife to give birth. The doctor came and informed the dad that his son was born without a torso, arms, or legs. The son was just a head!

But the dad loved his son and raised him as well as he could. Eighteen years later, the son was old enough for his first drink. The dad took him to a bar, tearfully told him he was proud of him, and ordered the biggest, strongest drink for his boy. With all the bar patrons looking on curiously, the boy took his first sip of alcohol.

Swoooop! A torso popped out!

The bar was dead silent, then burst into a whoop of joy. The father, shocked, begged his son to drink again. The patrons chanted, "Take another drink! Take another drink!" The bartender shook his head in dismay.

Swoooop! Two arms popped out!

The bar went wild. The father, crying and wailing, begged his son to drink again. The patrons chanted, "Take another drink! Take another drink!" But the bartender ignored the whole affair.

By this time, the boy was getting tipsy. With his new hands, he reached down, grabbed the drink, and guzzled the last of it.

Swoooop! Two legs popped out.

The bar was in chaos. The father wept with joy. The boy stood up on his new legs. He stumbled to the left. He stumbled to the right. Then he stumbled through the front door and into the street, where a truck ran him over.

The bar fell silent. The father moaned with grief. The bartender merely sighed and said, "He should have quit while he was a head."

Local Mods : Please ignore word count for this post. It's copy/paste.
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