Anyone who's been on the discord chat or I PM'ed the past two days know I've been going through conflict. Anyone who has seen my past threads know that I have my fair share of issues with my family, especially my mother. 

I looked back at my first few posts, and I just saw this part (reposting cuz the post was originally in a private forum):

"I asked for help. I cried over my suffering in school. What do I get in return? "Just listen and obey your mother." "Talk it out with her." "No one is hitting you, so it's nothing to worry about." "You can wait til you're 18. Not like she can be worse." Thanks guys. Exactly what I needed "

I just looked at the "wait til you're 18. Not like she can be worse" part ... and sighed so deeply.

I'm 19 years old, and I'm still not allowed to make my own choices. Until very recently, my mom still had full control of my life. I was still forced to see my psychiatrist and therapist against my will, and even after I told her I wanted to move out and stay with relatives for college, I was told that I will never move out of her home and her care until I can take full responsibility of myself and not have anyone with me.

... ha ha .... considering she never teaches me how to even cook or drive or even get a job, we all know that's never going to happen.

Even better, I talked to my aunt, and all she said was "listen to your mom." That did it. I just went to my room and didn't want to talk to anyone ... haha .... my mom wanted to see me. I told her I wanted to be alone ... so she started throwing accusations on how I hate her, and she threatened to cancel my college friends if I didn't open the door for her. A huge argument broke out, so I left the house, and I started venting on social media.

Including Facebook.

Yeah, I found something online that said children, upon reaching a certain age, can choose which parent they want to live with since their parents are separated. I posted it while circling that part, on facebook. 

My mom hasn't spoken to me since, and currently, my grandma is threatening to cancel paying for my phone if I don't delete my facebook posts.

Yeah... I'm done. I'm sick of this family. It amazes me that even though I'm NINETEEN YEARS OLD, I am still forbidden from moving out of my mother's home, not even with another relative. I never said she couldn't pay for my college fees or anything of that sort. I just said I wanted to be with another relative because they live closer to the college I will be attending. Now that I've began to post about it on facebook, I'm being threatened by my grandma to delete MY posts, under the excuse that everyone is pissed ... everyone being nosy friends / relatives who feel the need to complain about my posts to everyone else except me. I'm sorry, but I'm done staying with my family, especially with a mother who wants to control my life, and everyone else in the house knowing full well what's going on, but refusing to do anything about it.

Today, my dad got me. Right now, I'm in his house. As of today, we're making progress to sort everything out. He's welcomed me to live with him, as he always has done, and I'm happy being with him. Even having to share a room with my sisters doesn't bother me at all, since I love spending time with them. My dad is aware now of what has happened in that house, and isn't happy to know that my requests to live with him were ignored completely.

This is only the beginning of regaining control of my life. Hopefully, I won't ever have to return to that house, and I can commute to college with my dad's aid. I'm also hoping to get a job for myself too.

Also, while talking about college, my SAT scores saved me. I'm skipping the pre-college classes and starting community college with college level courses. Assuming things go smoothly (which I don't think will happen, since my mom may possibly try to get me back, despite the fact that I'm a legal adult), I should be able to live peacefully.

Eirinn :
Pacman+Mariofan :
Eniitan :

I've been talking to you three about it, so I want you guys to know I'm out of my mom's house for now. Hopefully, I'll be able to just stay out, but we'll see.

So you're at your dad's now? Awesome. I was actually afraid that she would fight you on leaving to begin with, but it sounds as though there were no altercations or other forms of resistance. It also sounds like your current living arrangements are much better and much healthier, which is also wonderful news.


Don't be too hard on the people that say things like "wait a few more years. At least she doesn't hit you" and such. There are kids out there that just hate their parents because they're parents, and some people just become jaded because they see those things. You did need to get out of there and into a healthy environment, so it's great to see that you finally managed to. I'll be praying that getting the other things straightened out will go smoothly for you. Thanks for letting me know about this.

This is great to hear since it's been so long that these problems have been going on. I'm praying that you'll be able to stay with your dad and sisters, and that your mom won't be able to take you back.

Keep having fun and I hope you are able to find work!

Courage and perseverance have a magical talisman, before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish into air. - John Quincy Adams.


Nothing really changes unless you see to it that it does. Be considerate, be a team player, be empathetic, but don't be a slave and don't be a door mat. I hope you find your new quarters comfortable.

I am so happy for you right now. I apologize for not replying as soon as you summoned me. As I told you before got busy with cake doing...anyways. I've been waiting for a long time for this for you to finally move out from your mothers house. What was happening there wasn't healthy for you at all. And this blew your self esteem really low because of how she controlled your life. I'm not saying shes all bad. But once she realizes what she has done I am sure in time she'll fix her mistakes.

Well good riddance, your mother is as I said an idiot. I do hope you stay with your dad and are able to get control of your life because your mother seems to have completely not allowed that. Your best bet is to get her as much out of your life as possible, because at this point she is more hurting you than raising you.

I think we all tend to think the worst of each other. Those we are closest to are most privy to our faults. While I don't know how serious your family situation is, I believe your personal situation is of the utmost importance. That means changing your outlook and behavior. I went through a long period of time of faultfinding with my family. I tend to struggle with it still. Perhaps we all do. But I have learned to change my outlook. I still see their faults, yes. But I have my own to deal with! And I sure don't want them to focus on mine, so why should I focus on theirs? I plead with you to take time to see the good in them. If you will do so, you will see more and more the good in yourself.

supernerd117 :
Boured :
Eniitan :
m0ssb3rg935 : (pls let this summon work)
Pacman+Mariofan :
Eirinn :

I just thought I'd update you guys, if anyone was wondering what was up.

I'm officially living with my dad now. So yay, and even better, my mom hasn't really done anything about it. She just accepted it and went on with her life. Of course, I am going to spend a weekend at her home due to an event occurring in town and my grandfather really, really, really misses me.

I'm actually doing a lot better with my dad and his family. I'm going to school twice a week, so I have the remaining 5 days to do my homework and chill. I've also taken responsibility in picking up my siblings from school, and I'm slowly learning to cook.

I also haven't seen my case manager since. I'm not 100% sure if they closed my case after I left, and honestly, I don't want to deal with them anymore. I've mentioned elsewhere, but I was getting really tired of them. I was with them for not even a year yet, and they've placed me with four case managers, as well as threatening to close my case if all this paper work that was never discussed with me or my mom  wasn't filled out by a certain day (and on the day we learned this, we only had 4 days to take care of it all). Yeah, I really don't want to stay with a company that can't keep me up to date and has to constantly change my case managers. Then there's my therapist and psychiatrist, both I don't like at all.

And on an unrelated note but still part of my life... college! I love college so far, tho maybe it's cuz I started with community college, but I already am making friends and getting along well with others, so I have nothing to worry about.

And that's it. I'm just finally getting a grip on life, so I'm fine right now. I'm much happier now, and my mom and grandma have ceased causing trouble.

YES!!! This is really great news that I needed to hear today. (Maybe I'll post what's going on with me later or make a poem relating to it) Your mom probably figured there was nothing she could do that would convince you to move back in with her.

Going to college 2 days a week is a crazy good bonus! At this point I feel like I'd need to do that in order for my situations not to be so bad. Picking up your siblings sounds fun. I've really wanted to begin driving home from school with my mom but every day, something comes up (mostly weather or traffic) that prevents it :/ Today I would have been able to do that if I didn't stay for drama club.

Wow, that seems tough. Congrats for holding out so long. You have my support. I can't wait to see how this commences. Good luck with life.