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02-25-20 01:10 PM

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Admitting my horrible deeds.
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Boured
07-12-16 03:37 PM
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07-13-16 03:18 PM

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07-12-16 03:37 PM
Boured is Offline
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Boured
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I'm here today to tell you something I did, and to tell you that I'm a horrible person. But first I need to reveal to you that I am bisexual. I've been bisexual for a while now and yesterday I started dating a guy, but I did it for the wrong reasons and I ended up telling him that the only reason I started dating him was to make him happy. He was angry obviously and I tried to tell him I was sorry but he thought I was lying......not a bad assumption. He has had a very hard love life and I only made it worse. I then did something even worse, I tried to tell him it was a prank even though it was not as a last resort to get him back. He obviously didn't believe it I mean who the heck would? He is now going to share it with my full name as well as a link to every social media site he knows of including here. I will be hated and harassed for my actions, something I'm totally fine with as I deserve it for being such a horrible person. I'm probably going to be hated by people on Vizzed as well but I don't care as I deserve to be hated. I don't care if I lose so much TP that I reach the negative hundreds, I don't care if I lose my staff position, because I know it is all my fault. For being a horrible person who doesn't deserve people or friends as nice as I have.

I'll leave you with this, I'm sorry to him, I'm sorry to my friends, I'm sorry to Vizzed for even registering to this site. I'm sorry.
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(edited by 18mlivingston on 07-12-16 11:34 PM)    

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07-12-16 04:12 PM
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Just because of one mistake does not make you a horrible person overall. Everyone makes mistakes. This is coming from a former perma banned user. We just have to forgive ourselves and apologize to those who were affected, and hopefully they will forgive you. We learn from mistakes. From this mistake, I hope you learned not to lie about whether you want to be in a relationship with that person or not. If that was me, and you did that to me, even though I'm straight, I would still be fuming. But, I would not spread all this stuff as much as I could. That's just cruel. I have slight trust issues with some friends in real life, thinking about if they're really my friend or not. So this situation reminds me of me and my trust issues. He may still be angry now, but hopefully as time passes he will forgive you. He may not, but that's his problem if he doesn't. I don't know how to help with the issue about him spreading it to other social media, but if he does that on Vizzed, hopefully the staff or mods can report it and delete it, but I'd rather not speak for them and tell you that they will. I would, but that's for them to discuss. I still trust you, don't get so beat up about it. Just make sure to try not to tell someone something to make them happy. I mean, you can sometimes, but, on an issue such as this, I'd rather not. I'd rather be truthful with everything I say unless I'm being sarcastic. Just to be clear, this post is not sarcasm. We're here for you, buddy.
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07-12-16 04:28 PM
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PM me if you want to talk.

you aren't a horrible person - if you were, you wouldn't be feeling this much remorse. it's true that dating someone solely to make them happy is not sufficient for a relationship, and hopefully you will learn from this experience not to do it again, but the fact that your reason for doing it was to make him happy really says enough about how "horrible" of a person you are, which is, suffice to say, not at all. we all make mistakes, especially when we're young.

also, i apologize for sounding rude, but if i were dating the type of guy who would publicly humiliate me as well as send people to harass me online for making him angry, then i would not feel bad about breaking up with him at all. 

in conclusion, please don't beat yourself up about it. you wanted to make him feel happy, and now he wants to make you feel miserable. i think you're misunderstanding who the real horrible person is.
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07-12-16 05:17 PM
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Everyone makes mistakes while they're dating. It's not like you'll be an expert on dating or well really anything when you're only 16. And as for the guy deciding to show everyone what an awful person you are, he should really put everything in perspective. I'm assuming that he's around the same age as you, and obviously at your age the chance for a lasting relationship is rather low.

Admitting your mistakes is the first step in redeeming yourself. It sounds like you truly care about this, and feel a lot of remorse for what you've done, which means that you are a decent person. Remember that everyone makes mistakes, and that we're all human.

And as for possibly losing your staff position... there was no actual rule breaking on the site and we can only really punish people for what they've done on-site so that isn't something you should worry about ^^'.
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07-12-16 06:09 PM
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You're not a horrible person at all. If anything, the dude you were with is way worse off than you are. If you truly love or care for someone, even if they break your heart, you don't go out of your way to publicly shame and humiliate them, or even disclose private information such as this.

You don't deserve any of what he's trying to dish out either. If anything, he should be humbled you cared enough to go with him in the first place, even if it wasn't for the best reasons. To be honest, the guy sounds like he's more trouble than he's worth, and you should probably avoid him from this point forward. Someone who's so quick to be judge and jury, as well as doing something to spite you like this isn't exactly the kind of person who you want to surround yourself with. 

You don't need to be so hard on yourself. Even if you made some serious mistakes in your personal life (and I'm not even saying this is that serious. people break up all the time. it hurts now, but down the road it will be just another memory), that doesn't effect how you should, or will be viewed by everyone you know, or even by everyone here on Vizzed. Even if you met the person through the site, your personal life is meant to be private, and completely separate from your Staff position or TP status. Not only that, but your friends won't, or at least shouldn't think any less of you over this happening. The people worth having in your life, as well as most of the site, will be understanding that life has it's ups and downs, and will stick with you through them.

The only way this scenario portrays you as a horrible person is IF you had only went with them to manipulate them, simply for your own amusement, or to get something you wanted. And even then, showing as much regret over it that you are shows you're not horrible by any means. You had good intentions, and despite the saying about them, they are what matters almost more than anything else.
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07-12-16 06:20 PM
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18mlivingston : Let me ask a few questions:

1. Does being bisexual have anything to do with anything? You started a relationship with someone. Gay, straight, whatever, it doesn't matter. There's nothing here that has any bearing on your identification.

2. Why are you responsible for someone else's feelings? If you did play with him just to get him upset, okay, you're not nice but just because he had 'a rough love life' doesn't mean you owe him anything. And let's be honest, no one in high school can have a real rough love life. There's not enough time and experience to feel pain the way other folks do. Have a relationship with someone you think loves you for ten years and then have them pull the rug out. That sucks.

But yes, I agree the only experiences are the ones you have so at 16 or whatever, it's the toughest he's ever faced.

So, the point is this: Are people going to join Vizzed.com to bad mouth you? I think that's awesome because you're driving website usage. And in a week, they'll all be playing Pokémon Go or yelling at some other person so no one will really care.

Just take this experience with you into the future and learn from it. Don't date people unless you're genuinely interested in developing something strong with them or if it's purely physical, be upfront and just say they're hot and that's that.

Also take away lying and trying to get someone back. Don't let yourself do it again and you're not a bad person. You made a mistake because you're learning. You now have the experience to not do it again. You're only a bad person if you do it again on purpose.

Make sense?
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07-12-16 06:32 PM
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18mlivingston : "I'm a horrible person". That's not how things work. We have a constant, infinite value, and while we may not always live up to that value, the value remains what it is no matter what we do. Yes, you did a horrible thing, but doing a horrible thing doesn't make you a horrible person. We are not defined by our poor choices unless we choose to be. Don't you dare rub your mistakes in your own face. I did more than my share of that when I was younger, and I still have a hard time with some of my choices, some of which are just plain terrible. It's what we choose today, tomorrow, and the next day that matter. Choosing to try to be better is what matters, not whether or not we are perfect today or tomorrow. No matter what people do to you, you can choose to be happy.

I think you should do your best to apologize to that guy and ask for his forgiveness, then try to do better. That way, if he refuses to forgive you, that's only on HIM. You'll walk away from this circumstance with a scot-free conscience, and greater self-esteem. He'll be the one that's unhappy, not you. You've got this. Now go out there and live!
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07-12-16 06:43 PM
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Slow down. It's good to recognize and feel remorse when you've made a mistake and hurt someones feelings but you shouldn't treat it like it's the end of the world. You're making it sound like what you did was murder a guy. We all make mistakes in our life sometimes big sometimes small but constantly beating  yourself up about it isn't going to help anything.

The best you can do is try to do right by that person and if that doesn't work at least you tried. Honestly even if what you did was bad, someone who would subject you to that kind of harassment to make you pay doesn't seem like an entirely morally just person either. In the end in stead of delving on it try to move on and learn from your mistakes.
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07-12-16 07:13 PM
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That person is actually me, and I'm here to apologize about threatening to frame you, Max. I have been dumped, forgotten, and so on and so forth. I don't know if I'm worth being a friend either, but I try my best to be a good friend. My first ex-girlfriend was actually killed, which has still affected me. I don't know anymore... But I have lost hope. I'm sorry.

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07-12-16 08:12 PM
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It is normal to make mistakes, unfortunately.

However, I would like to urge you to pick yourself up and see it as a learning experience. Do not beat yourself to the ground, it is not the end yet. While yes, what you did was bad, but you are not at all fault here. Your ex-boyfriend carries half the fault, because to do such a thing is very immature and irresponsible of him. I will not hate and I will not harass you. Actually, I have faith that the people who posted before me would/will do the same! You have people on here who care, and you can count me as one of them. This current predicament, that feels like an impasse, is only for a season. With time, it will come and it will go. All there is too it is to hang on. It's very difficult, I understand, but I believe you can do it. I can bet my college money that all these users before me believe so too! So, don't give up-- even if it's over!

Hopefully, this post and the many others before and after me fills you with DETERMINATION. And I mean it, too.


Hope you have a blessed, most splendid, wonderful week!


**EDIT: I apologize for keeping it short, but I think others have told you valid points in different words, already.
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(edited by Poka Mocha on 07-12-16 08:14 PM)     Post Rating: 2   Liked By: Boured, Uzar,

07-12-16 08:20 PM
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So.... why are we supposed to hate you?

You can't blame yourself for him having a hard love life...
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07-12-16 08:59 PM
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Well, it seems like no one else is going to say it so I will...

I hate you for this! How could you be so inconsiderate? I think I'll ban you now!




[obvious sarcasm should be obvious]
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07-12-16 09:15 PM
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I thank you all for cheering me up, especially geogree's sarcasm which made me chuckle quite a bit. The person in question has come apologized to me for trying to threaten me with humiliation, and said he was sorry. We are also dating again, we will will make it work. I will try my hardest to make it work.

geeogree : That sarcasm was amazing.
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(edited by 18mlivingston on 07-12-16 09:29 PM)     Post Rating: 1   Liked By: Poka Mocha,

07-12-16 09:15 PM
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Message was posted twice.
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(edited by 18mlivingston on 07-12-16 09:16 PM)    

07-12-16 09:24 PM
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Double post and summon? Unacceptable! I hope you like your perma ban!!  
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07-12-16 10:14 PM
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18mlivingston: Wow now, hey! Calm down, think about the situation. I'm sure that you're stressed out and everything because of all this, and you have every right to be upset and stressed and worried and all of that stuff, but this is not the end of the world. Everyone makes mistakes, and you certainly made one, but that's okay, you can get through this. 

And hey, according to your last post here, you're back together now, so it looks like everything is going alright now, right? You're fine, he's fine, and I hope that everyone's happy. Good luck and all.
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07-12-16 10:19 PM
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Everyone makes mistakes, and it's best to move on and forget about it, but in this case, you can't forget about it.
Now that you're back together, it's something you can forget now. It's in the past, and all of it's over.
As I said earlier, learn from your mistakes.
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07-12-16 10:27 PM
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Nah man you will be fine. Every one messes up. That's what Lifes about. Any one can make the same mistake you did because at the end of the day we are all human. Just try too not worry about it. Life is about living. We cant all be thinking about our mistakes. We only live once so try to be as happy as you can be. Good luck with every thing Livingston
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07-13-16 01:24 AM
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Maybe I see this a little bit different because I'm weird, but I think that your assessment that you are a horrible person can be thrown out the window after the first few sentences. While having a successful relationship requires more than just making the other person happy, the fact that you dated someone just for tehir happiness is pretty unselfish to me. You threw your own wants and needs out of the window to make another person feel better. Now it didn't necessarily end well, but I think your intentions weren't bad at all. I agree that telling him that it was a prank wasn't in your best interest, but as long as you learn from it, you'll be fine. And you won't be harassed on Vizzed, because it's an overall nice place. Good luck dude and if you ever need to talk, you know where to find me.
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07-13-16 11:29 AM
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I think now that everything is good now there is no reason for this to remain open.

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