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01-30-15 10:54 PM
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Losing a Family Member

 

01-30-15 10:54 PM
geeogree is Offline
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So this past weekend my sister-in-law (my wife's older brothers wife) died suddenly. I still don't know what happened to cause this but we're all in a bit of shock. My wife went out to Connecticut (which is really far away from Western Canada) for the funeral.

This is the closest person to me to ever die out of nowhere. It has been especially hard on my wife since they were fairly close.

I'm not really sure why I'm making this thread. I guess I just want to talk about it and get it off my chest since I haven't had anyone to talk about it to since my wife left to go out there.
So this past weekend my sister-in-law (my wife's older brothers wife) died suddenly. I still don't know what happened to cause this but we're all in a bit of shock. My wife went out to Connecticut (which is really far away from Western Canada) for the funeral.

This is the closest person to me to ever die out of nowhere. It has been especially hard on my wife since they were fairly close.

I'm not really sure why I'm making this thread. I guess I just want to talk about it and get it off my chest since I haven't had anyone to talk about it to since my wife left to go out there.
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01-30-15 11:08 PM
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geeogree : Wow, I'm terribly sorry about what happened, I know this experience all too well and its both terrible and painful, but you'll pull through, but it will take a while. This happens all the time and is beyond our control, but its still something that nobody wants to go through, even if the experience is being had by somebody you know, so I wish you all the best through this.
geeogree : Wow, I'm terribly sorry about what happened, I know this experience all too well and its both terrible and painful, but you'll pull through, but it will take a while. This happens all the time and is beyond our control, but its still something that nobody wants to go through, even if the experience is being had by somebody you know, so I wish you all the best through this.
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01-30-15 11:11 PM
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geeogree : Man, that is terrible to hear about what happened to your love one, I want to say that loosing someone you love in your family can be quite tough, I know those experience and going though those experience is an emotional pain. I hope you can be able to pull it together. We're here for you.
geeogree : Man, that is terrible to hear about what happened to your love one, I want to say that loosing someone you love in your family can be quite tough, I know those experience and going though those experience is an emotional pain. I hope you can be able to pull it together. We're here for you.
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01-31-15 08:17 AM
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I've never had anyone very close to me die. The closest person I've had die on me is my cousin Josh, and I barely knew him. As difficult as it may be, I hope one day I will understand how it feels to go through such grief, and the comfort that can come afterwards.

I hope you'll overcome this as soon as you can!
I've never had anyone very close to me die. The closest person I've had die on me is my cousin Josh, and I barely knew him. As difficult as it may be, I hope one day I will understand how it feels to go through such grief, and the comfort that can come afterwards.

I hope you'll overcome this as soon as you can!
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01-31-15 10:46 AM
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Geez Geo, I'm sorry you had to go through that.

My grandfather died last week. The first death I've ever experienced in my life that was around me. I never even met the man, but what everybody on that side of the family was feeling was just overwhelming. Everybody was in tears and the crowd was lined to the streets.

From what I saw at that funeral, grief is a good feeling to have. Not in the sense of happiness, but it really shows that it's okay to go through things sadly, and the biggest thing to pull from it is that the reason these people were so sad were because they had such happiness with this one person to begin with.

If they were so miserable over this one persons death, surely they must have had great joy when he was around, and the fact that people can be sad at all means that they had great times before.
Geez Geo, I'm sorry you had to go through that.

My grandfather died last week. The first death I've ever experienced in my life that was around me. I never even met the man, but what everybody on that side of the family was feeling was just overwhelming. Everybody was in tears and the crowd was lined to the streets.

From what I saw at that funeral, grief is a good feeling to have. Not in the sense of happiness, but it really shows that it's okay to go through things sadly, and the biggest thing to pull from it is that the reason these people were so sad were because they had such happiness with this one person to begin with.

If they were so miserable over this one persons death, surely they must have had great joy when he was around, and the fact that people can be sad at all means that they had great times before.
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01-31-15 10:06 PM
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geeogree: Hey there. Sorry to hear about the unexpected death you recently suffered. Now I could sit here and throw all kinds of things I myself have heard quite often ( because I lost a lot of family over the last 15 years ), like " When god calls you answer. " or " When it is your time then it is your time. " and so on . I'm not going to do that to you because if you are feeling anything like I was at the time that is the last thing you want to hear. I will say the loss may be unexpected but don't dwell on it. Take some time with your family, wife or whoever you choose to share it with, kick back and remember the good things ( good times as well ) about your sister-in-law. Celebrate her life because from the way you were speaking she was obviously loved and well thought of. I went through this many times myself and it never gets any easier. I lost my mother, father, grandmother, aunt, and more family. All of them were unexpected except for one. It's gonna take time to adjust to the loss but it will dull down a bit over time. You'll always feel some pain and morn for them but it will get better. Take it from a veteran of this so to speak. I wish you well and just gotta say I feel for you. Take care. 
geeogree: Hey there. Sorry to hear about the unexpected death you recently suffered. Now I could sit here and throw all kinds of things I myself have heard quite often ( because I lost a lot of family over the last 15 years ), like " When god calls you answer. " or " When it is your time then it is your time. " and so on . I'm not going to do that to you because if you are feeling anything like I was at the time that is the last thing you want to hear. I will say the loss may be unexpected but don't dwell on it. Take some time with your family, wife or whoever you choose to share it with, kick back and remember the good things ( good times as well ) about your sister-in-law. Celebrate her life because from the way you were speaking she was obviously loved and well thought of. I went through this many times myself and it never gets any easier. I lost my mother, father, grandmother, aunt, and more family. All of them were unexpected except for one. It's gonna take time to adjust to the loss but it will dull down a bit over time. You'll always feel some pain and morn for them but it will get better. Take it from a veteran of this so to speak. I wish you well and just gotta say I feel for you. Take care. 
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02-01-15 01:32 AM
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You are not alone man... I have dealt with 3 family member losses so far in my life. I wasn't really close with any of them but yet others were close with them. It was quite sad to see some of my family members cry and they aren't the type to cry. I even cried as well because the atmosphere of the funerals were just so depressing and heart breaking.

Death happens out of nowhere when you at least expect it and that is what happens in life. Surprises like this are not the best but we need to prepare for the unexpected. It is okay to let out your emotions and talk to someone that you are comfortable with. You are not alone so share your thoughts with someone who is in the same spot as you.

Time heals all wounds! Take your time, step forward, and move on whenever you are ready. 
You are not alone man... I have dealt with 3 family member losses so far in my life. I wasn't really close with any of them but yet others were close with them. It was quite sad to see some of my family members cry and they aren't the type to cry. I even cried as well because the atmosphere of the funerals were just so depressing and heart breaking.

Death happens out of nowhere when you at least expect it and that is what happens in life. Surprises like this are not the best but we need to prepare for the unexpected. It is okay to let out your emotions and talk to someone that you are comfortable with. You are not alone so share your thoughts with someone who is in the same spot as you.

Time heals all wounds! Take your time, step forward, and move on whenever you are ready. 
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02-01-15 03:57 AM
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Geeo, I can't begin to say I know how you're feeling: only you know that. What I can and will say is that I'm sorry for your loss, and I'll be praying for you and your family. If I can somehow be of any service, please don't hesitate to ask.
Geeo, I can't begin to say I know how you're feeling: only you know that. What I can and will say is that I'm sorry for your loss, and I'll be praying for you and your family. If I can somehow be of any service, please don't hesitate to ask.
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02-03-15 09:35 PM
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I appreciate all the comments here. This whole situation has made it tough for me to post and taken a lot of my free time away because my wife has been gone for the last week to be with her family.

Hopefully once she comes back and things go back to normal soon. Stuff like this is hard and I know it's been tough on her. It sucks that she is there and I'm not so I can't even help her through it.

Still, it's nice to have Vizzed to post at when I don't feel like I have anyone else to turn to.
I appreciate all the comments here. This whole situation has made it tough for me to post and taken a lot of my free time away because my wife has been gone for the last week to be with her family.

Hopefully once she comes back and things go back to normal soon. Stuff like this is hard and I know it's been tough on her. It sucks that she is there and I'm not so I can't even help her through it.

Still, it's nice to have Vizzed to post at when I don't feel like I have anyone else to turn to.
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02-03-15 09:54 PM
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geeogree : that's one of the reasons why I stayed here really after most sites I've been to I got bored of within a month, there will always be someone to help you out, even people you don't know or don't even like. If something gets you down, the support is incredible and its true here too, we'll all try our best to keep your spirits up.
geeogree : that's one of the reasons why I stayed here really after most sites I've been to I got bored of within a month, there will always be someone to help you out, even people you don't know or don't even like. If something gets you down, the support is incredible and its true here too, we'll all try our best to keep your spirits up.
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02-03-15 09:59 PM
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zanderlex : that's why I've been here for 10 years now. It's not because I'm big into retro gaming, or current gaming. It is because this is a place that is safe. Not just for me but for a lot of people. I've been at my highest and my lowest while posting on this site and I've been able to share that and get through things because of the support I got.

That's why no matter how good or bad things have been here I've always ended up coming back. This is like a 2nd home to me.
zanderlex : that's why I've been here for 10 years now. It's not because I'm big into retro gaming, or current gaming. It is because this is a place that is safe. Not just for me but for a lot of people. I've been at my highest and my lowest while posting on this site and I've been able to share that and get through things because of the support I got.

That's why no matter how good or bad things have been here I've always ended up coming back. This is like a 2nd home to me.
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02-03-15 10:10 PM
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That's very true, I joined to play a specific game, but since I joined, I doubt I played more than 5 hours total of any rgr games combined. I met so many nice people when I first joined and pretty much every single one of them is still here with me. For me this is more of a 1st home really which is why I try to spend as much time as I can and interact.
That's very true, I joined to play a specific game, but since I joined, I doubt I played more than 5 hours total of any rgr games combined. I met so many nice people when I first joined and pretty much every single one of them is still here with me. For me this is more of a 1st home really which is why I try to spend as much time as I can and interact.
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02-11-15 08:00 PM
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Sorry to hear it gg. I truly am.

It made me think I have yet to loose a relative my age. Or even anyone my moms age. Just the usual grandpas, grandmas and the like. And the usual people my own age who died in car accidents, got murdered, od`d or killed themselves but it is not the same as losing a brother or a sister. I guess when that will actually happen, I will think of death in a different way.

All the best to you and your wife, dude. And my condolences, ofcource.
Sorry to hear it gg. I truly am.

It made me think I have yet to loose a relative my age. Or even anyone my moms age. Just the usual grandpas, grandmas and the like. And the usual people my own age who died in car accidents, got murdered, od`d or killed themselves but it is not the same as losing a brother or a sister. I guess when that will actually happen, I will think of death in a different way.

All the best to you and your wife, dude. And my condolences, ofcource.
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