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About Me This Time I'm letting Out What I Am Hiding....
Its important you see this my friends and people I know.....
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About Me This Time I'm letting Out What I Am Hiding....
09-05-13 05:10 PM
Eniitan is Offline
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Hi everyone, my friends and people I know.....I have a confession to make. Yes I have told people about myself but this specific one I kept locked away..... until I couldn't take it any longer this happened a few days ago... but, today I was reading a book sent by Frod to help me improve of being a good author. Little did I know when I got to a chapter.....I broke down, the words made me think, other wise of how I feel about myself.... Ok.....From the time I was young I know not all girls say this but. I hated myself because of how I was mistreated. I did very so hate myself in a way of....appealing I don't bother try to look nice but, my mother told me so. I did it for the sake of not getting told off......I don't think I'm pretty I never did. I wasn't strong enough to defend for myself....So since I finished college I locked myself in my house.....I didn't want to suffer anymore as it was..... I am still at home I just don't want to go out but....seeing what Frod gave to me has changed my mind a little you see....I care for everyone, my friends on here and my family too but never myself.....If I try to I get emotional, and just start to get angry with myself for being such a weakling... but reading some if that book has opened my eyes to see what I have done.....I....Have been caught up in the past since then even till now I was struggling the fight.....Not only that I took myself for granted as well. Seeing what I saw made me cry.....and now my heart still feels *Hollow* an empty feeling of only to think and not sure of what to do next....I feel bad for what I have done since I came to this site I will say this again. I have truly met amazing people who like me for who I am as a disabled person, who say I am pretty or cute, to say I am the coolest.....still don't think I am cool but many people think I do and I am sure they are right..... So.....what am I going to do now? I am please to say....I don't hate myself so much anymore and owe a lot to my friends and to the people who know me.....its because they kept saying those things to me but I remember I said I'm not pretty...are you sure I am cool? I don't think I am....for my age I think I may be too mature but.....I have come to see what I have told everyone but myself.... which is... Live your life to the fullest don't always stay in the past But I do know this I have a very strong heart for people that will never ever change because that's where my determination comes from to help people.....So now in the future I will take myself into consideration and always say the positive things to me, myself and I.....I'm really happy that Sensei gave me that book to read but....I wasn't about to go on because of how the words hit me hard.... So again I want to thank you guys for giving me the support I need. And I mean it from the bottom of my heart. ^-^ I'm happy I have finally got this off my chest. I will summon the few who knows this already.... Frodlex SunflowerGaming YourMajestyKen TornadoMudkip Ok.....From the time I was young I know not all girls say this but. I hated myself because of how I was mistreated. I did very so hate myself in a way of....appealing I don't bother try to look nice but, my mother told me so. I did it for the sake of not getting told off......I don't think I'm pretty I never did. I wasn't strong enough to defend for myself....So since I finished college I locked myself in my house.....I didn't want to suffer anymore as it was..... I am still at home I just don't want to go out but....seeing what Frod gave to me has changed my mind a little you see....I care for everyone, my friends on here and my family too but never myself.....If I try to I get emotional, and just start to get angry with myself for being such a weakling... but reading some if that book has opened my eyes to see what I have done.....I....Have been caught up in the past since then even till now I was struggling the fight.....Not only that I took myself for granted as well. Seeing what I saw made me cry.....and now my heart still feels *Hollow* an empty feeling of only to think and not sure of what to do next....I feel bad for what I have done since I came to this site I will say this again. I have truly met amazing people who like me for who I am as a disabled person, who say I am pretty or cute, to say I am the coolest.....still don't think I am cool but many people think I do and I am sure they are right..... So.....what am I going to do now? I am please to say....I don't hate myself so much anymore and owe a lot to my friends and to the people who know me.....its because they kept saying those things to me but I remember I said I'm not pretty...are you sure I am cool? I don't think I am....for my age I think I may be too mature but.....I have come to see what I have told everyone but myself.... which is... Live your life to the fullest don't always stay in the past But I do know this I have a very strong heart for people that will never ever change because that's where my determination comes from to help people.....So now in the future I will take myself into consideration and always say the positive things to me, myself and I.....I'm really happy that Sensei gave me that book to read but....I wasn't about to go on because of how the words hit me hard.... So again I want to thank you guys for giving me the support I need. And I mean it from the bottom of my heart. ^-^ I'm happy I have finally got this off my chest. I will summon the few who knows this already.... Frodlex SunflowerGaming YourMajestyKen TornadoMudkip |
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09-05-13 05:16 PM
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Don't hate yourself, Enii. Bullies are just jerks who are, most of the time, just jealous of you. You are a really good person, and you're not weak. You're not afraid to write poems, and make confessions. Just look! You confessed a secret! I almost tell no one about my secrets. You're really strong, Enii. And you're really cool. Ignore bullies, they don't get it. You rock. Don't hate yourself, Enii. Bullies are just jerks who are, most of the time, just jealous of you. You are a really good person, and you're not weak. You're not afraid to write poems, and make confessions. Just look! You confessed a secret! I almost tell no one about my secrets. You're really strong, Enii. And you're really cool. Ignore bullies, they don't get it. You rock. |
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09-05-13 05:16 PM
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Eniitan : Aww... Well this is sad. I have a little of this experience and I understand. So people kept saying mean things to you? Well, that's not nice! Well, it is good that you have got it out of your mind. I am currently speechless now.. so yeah. Well this is sad. I have a little of this experience and I understand. So people kept saying mean things to you? Well, that's not nice! Well, it is good that you have got it out of your mind. I am currently speechless now.. so yeah. |
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09-05-13 05:35 PM
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Good to see you are becoming more um... better . Meh. I can't really sum it up in words but I am happy that you feel about yourself . I also think you are cool .  . I do not actually know how you look but I bet you are peety and or cute . Way to go and keep it up more motivational phrase . I bet with your emotion and skill you will be a breat author . Have A Nice Day ENII . I do not actually know how you look but I bet you are peety and or cute . Way to go and keep it up more motivational phrase . I bet with your emotion and skill you will be a breat author . Have A Nice Day ENII |
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09-05-13 06:26 PM
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Hey don't hate yourself. I got bullied too because I looked weird. But we all try to stay positive. YOU MUST SURVIVE IN THIS WORLD ENII!! Also you are more cooler than Coppercab.  |
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09-05-13 06:56 PM
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Next step: don't hate yourself at all. Hating yourself can lead to dissatisfaction with life, and with other people. You certainly aren't the coolest, and you shouldn't want to be. Being too cool can place you very much on your own. I've seen what you can do. You have brought joy into my own life as well as many others. Keep being you, while trying to be a bit better every day. Growth comes from trying to push slightly beyond our limitations. Push too hard, and we can break down. Push too little, and we become lazy and weak. You can do it! Maybe you can't do it today, maybe not tomorrow, but someday, you can accomplish all reasonable goals you have in mind, when you have a plan. I am recovering from a pornography addiction. It really took over my life and made me unhappy. I will never fully recover from the addiction in this lifetime, and that's ok. But I have decided not to look at the stuff, or even think about it in an inappropriate manner. Doing so will just make my life miserable. We all have our problems and disabilities. It's what we do despite them that matters, not whether or not we have them. Next step: don't hate yourself at all. Hating yourself can lead to dissatisfaction with life, and with other people. You certainly aren't the coolest, and you shouldn't want to be. Being too cool can place you very much on your own. I've seen what you can do. You have brought joy into my own life as well as many others. Keep being you, while trying to be a bit better every day. Growth comes from trying to push slightly beyond our limitations. Push too hard, and we can break down. Push too little, and we become lazy and weak. You can do it! Maybe you can't do it today, maybe not tomorrow, but someday, you can accomplish all reasonable goals you have in mind, when you have a plan. I am recovering from a pornography addiction. It really took over my life and made me unhappy. I will never fully recover from the addiction in this lifetime, and that's ok. But I have decided not to look at the stuff, or even think about it in an inappropriate manner. Doing so will just make my life miserable. We all have our problems and disabilities. It's what we do despite them that matters, not whether or not we have them. |
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09-06-13 02:44 AM
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Wow... Reading this, I think you might be an angel. I'm not understating, you're the kindest, nicest person I've ever met on a forum. Let me tell you, being cool isn't everything. Someone with your compassion shouldn't need to worry about stuff like that. |
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09-06-13 05:59 AM
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Enii, you are amazing. You are nicer than me, you are most likely stronger than me, you are one of a kind. Bullies are just jealous of you being so nice. But if I went to school or something with you, I would most likely kick any bully straight in his face, make him land in the trash can. I am always there for you, believe it or not. |
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09-06-13 09:40 AM
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We love you Enii  I admire your bravery to open yourself up to everyone here on vizzed. I'm still trying to do that myself. I understand what you mean, because I have experienced some of that too. People not accepting me. You are a strong person, don't let anyone tell you otherwise, people are afraid of different which makes them weak. I'm sorry I'm not really good at this emotional stuff but I'm here if you ever need to talk privately about something that you don't want anyone else to know about I hope you have a good rest of the day Madam Enii.We love you Enii I admire your bravery to open yourself up to everyone here on vizzed. I'm still trying to do that myself. I understand what you mean, because I have experienced some of that too. People not accepting me. You are a strong person, don't let anyone tell you otherwise, people are afraid of different which makes them weak. I'm sorry I'm not really good at this emotional stuff but I'm here if you ever need to talk privately about something that you don't want anyone else to know about I hope you have a good rest of the day Madam Enii. |
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09-06-13 11:17 AM
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I know how you feel enii...
the same happened to me. you're strong because you have the guts to tell us everything that happened so far. maybe i am a stranger to you but i think not. the same happened to me. you're strong because you have the guts to tell us everything that happened so far. maybe i am a stranger to you but i think not. |
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09-06-13 03:28 PM
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Well....its good that you don't hate yourself...and sorry to hear what happened to you in the past....but its best not to think about it.. (don't forget you have friends that care about you....*cough* mostly me) |
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09-06-13 06:45 PM
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I like you because you aren't afraid to be real. I hope it all works out for you. You already know my story and you know that I hid from the world at one point too. Let me know if I can ever help you in anyway... |
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09-06-13 10:17 PM
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Eniitan : good job at coming and telling everyone. so here is something I do best find something mlp related to this thread. Be who you are, you are one of a kind and special in your own way. Remember, love who you are. ~BronyDanceParty Eniitan : good job at coming and telling everyone. so here is something I do best find something mlp related to this thread. Be who you are, you are one of a kind and special in your own way. Remember, love who you are. ~BronyDanceParty |
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(edited by hunter31626 on 09-06-13 11:54 PM)
09-06-13 10:35 PM
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Eniitan : Eniitan don't sweat it. I know what you went through. I went through the same thing before, and I'm younger than you are. You are a great person, and I know it. A bunch of your friends know it. I would like to say TornadoMudkip understands you more than anyone on this site, I wish I could be a little more passionate towards you, and talk to you a little more. I don't think there is anything stopping me, but I want to tell you from now on I will be there to help you through everything you need. If there is something you want ask it. If you want to chat then lets chat. I can't let great friends go to waste because I am a real dushbag. Eniitan have a great life  . I hope you enjoy it to the fullest. Don't you worry about what people think. You are you and humans are humans no matter how they are on the outside or in. Also I must say in my opinion you are a beautiful women, and you must stay that way. Don't let anyone change you for anything. See you later friend .. I hope you enjoy it to the fullest. Don't you worry about what people think. You are you and humans are humans no matter how they are on the outside or in. Also I must say in my opinion you are a beautiful women, and you must stay that way. Don't let anyone change you for anything. See you later friend . |
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09-07-13 03:00 AM
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09-07-13 01:30 PM
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Good job Eniitan! I've only recently come to learn this as well. I've been in almost the same position as you, but I'm a little younger so it wasn't for as long. I've never had the guts to come up and say stuff like this to everyone. So I respect you a lot more for that. Don't let anyone make you doubt yourself. You're actually one of the coolest, nicest people I know. You're also really nice looking. Always be sure to stay strong. I hope you enjoy your life. Remember, if things get too hard, you always have friends on Vizzed to talk to. We care about you! Good job Eniitan! I've only recently come to learn this as well. I've been in almost the same position as you, but I'm a little younger so it wasn't for as long. I've never had the guts to come up and say stuff like this to everyone. So I respect you a lot more for that. Don't let anyone make you doubt yourself. You're actually one of the coolest, nicest people I know. You're also really nice looking. Always be sure to stay strong. I hope you enjoy your life. Remember, if things get too hard, you always have friends on Vizzed to talk to. We care about you! |
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09-07-13 01:46 PM
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Eniitan : Hi Eniitan, I rarely have spoken to you In chat but you seem like a pretty cool person to me. I can relate to some stuff that you wrote, I myself am a wall flower, I hardly go out to the movies and dred wallmart LOL. My past wasnt to kind to me either and I have also relized that people should live their life to the fullest even though their are very stupid people In the world and It makes It tough to always have a good time. I my self am always thinking of what people think about me but Im getting better at just focusing on myself and how I want to spend my time on this earth. : ) Eniitan : Hi Eniitan, I rarely have spoken to you In chat but you seem like a pretty cool person to me. I can relate to some stuff that you wrote, I myself am a wall flower, I hardly go out to the movies and dred wallmart LOL. My past wasnt to kind to me either and I have also relized that people should live their life to the fullest even though their are very stupid people In the world and It makes It tough to always have a good time. I my self am always thinking of what people think about me but Im getting better at just focusing on myself and how I want to spend my time on this earth. : ) |
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| Video gamer/ Athlete / Over all nice person. Mistakes to me are a learning expierience and shouldn't be forgotten |
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09-20-13 10:22 AM
RupeeFreak is Offline
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RupeeFreak
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We Love you Enii-chan~<3 |
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Location: Germany,Hannover,Niedersachsen,Bothfeld
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| Since when were you the one in control? |
Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'
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10-26-13 08:29 AM
Eniitan is Offline
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Local Mods : Please close this thread and thank you. ^-^ |
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| Number 1 Sailor Moon, Final Fantasy And Freedom Planet Fan On Vizzed! |
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