User Notice Forum Links
Related Threads
Coming Soon
Thread Information
Views
1,385
Replies
7
Rating
0
Status
CLOSED
Thread
Creator
Creator
supernerd117
11-01-10 11:21 AM
11-01-10 11:21 AM
Last
Post
Post
alexanyways
11-13-10 04:58 PM
11-13-10 04:58 PM
Views: 384
Today: 0
Users: 0 unique
Today: 0
Users: 0 unique
Thread Actions
Order
Chuck Norris jokes
11-01-10 11:21 AM
supernerd117 is Offline
| ID: 268696 | 163 Words
| ID: 268696 | 163 Words
supernerd117
Level: 145
POSTS: 1051/6187
POST EXP: 404633
LVL EXP: 37445847
CP: 17982.0
VIZ: 16125
POSTS: 1051/6187
POST EXP: 404633
LVL EXP: 37445847
CP: 17982.0
VIZ: 16125
Likes: 0 Dislikes: 0
Here's a place to post your favorite Chuck Norris jokes. Just make sure to keep 'em clean and have fun.
Here's one I made up: A chemist was feeling depressed. His wife had left him recently, he had lost his grant, and he was living out on the streets. Out of desperation, he decided to commit suicide, but was afraid to do the job. He asked his friend, also a chemist, to mix him up a bottle of Cyanide, known for its chemical abbreviation CN. So his friend mixed up a bottle of CN, and as soon as he put the bottle to his lips, a guy comes out of nowhere and delivers an instant roundhouse kick to his face. 3 weeks later, he wakes up in the hospital and asks his friend, "What happened?" His friend responded, "What I gave you wasn't a bottle of cyanide. It was a high-dose bottle of Chuck Norris!" Needless to say, he never tried suicide again. Here's one I made up: A chemist was feeling depressed. His wife had left him recently, he had lost his grant, and he was living out on the streets. Out of desperation, he decided to commit suicide, but was afraid to do the job. He asked his friend, also a chemist, to mix him up a bottle of Cyanide, known for its chemical abbreviation CN. So his friend mixed up a bottle of CN, and as soon as he put the bottle to his lips, a guy comes out of nowhere and delivers an instant roundhouse kick to his face. 3 weeks later, he wakes up in the hospital and asks his friend, "What happened?" His friend responded, "What I gave you wasn't a bottle of cyanide. It was a high-dose bottle of Chuck Norris!" Needless to say, he never tried suicide again. -------------------- |
Vizzed Elite
Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'
Registered: 03-21-10
Location: Location
Last Post: 2380 days
Last Active: 858 days
| WOOOOOOOO |
Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'
Registered: 03-21-10
Location: Location
Last Post: 2380 days
Last Active: 858 days
11-01-10 02:10 PM
8bitgamer is Offline
| ID: 268746 | 96 Words
8bitgamer is Offline
| ID: 268746 | 96 Words
8bitgamer
Level: 42
POSTS: 150/352
POST EXP: 8263
LVL EXP: 504114
CP: 194.9
VIZ: 20068
POSTS: 150/352
POST EXP: 8263
LVL EXP: 504114
CP: 194.9
VIZ: 20068
Likes: 0 Dislikes: 0
Here are a couple:
The Big Bang began when Chuck Norris sneezed. Kids check under their bed for the Boogeyman. The Boogeyman checks under his bed for Chuck Norris. Chuck be nimble, Chuck be quick, you can't dodge a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick. Chuck Norris can gargle peanut butter. Their is no "Ctrl" button on Chuck Norris's keyboard. Chuck Norris is always in control. Dinosaurs were extinct because of the Chuck Norrisaur. Chuck Norris can tastes lies. Chuck Norris knows the last digit of pi. If at first you don't succeed, you are not Chuck Norris.
|
Member
Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'
Registered: 06-23-10
Last Post: 5045 days
Last Active: 2853 days
| TheBlindDoctor |
Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'
Registered: 06-23-10
Last Post: 5045 days
Last Active: 2853 days
11-02-10 07:14 PM
gameface138 is Offline
| ID: 269485 | 16 Words
gameface138 is Offline
| ID: 269485 | 16 Words
gameface138
Level: 70
POSTS: 536/1135
POST EXP: 31119
LVL EXP: 2926388
CP: 197.5
VIZ: 67210
POSTS: 536/1135
POST EXP: 31119
LVL EXP: 2926388
CP: 197.5
VIZ: 67210
Likes: 0 Dislikes: 0
The dark is afraid of chuck norris.
Chuck norris' mom had a tattoo that says Chuck.
|
Trusted Member
Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'
Registered: 05-24-10
Location: Illinois
Last Post: 387 days
Last Active: 309 days
Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'
Registered: 05-24-10
Location: Illinois
Last Post: 387 days
Last Active: 309 days
11-02-10 07:32 PM
housechef1.5 is Offline
| ID: 269504 | 171 Words
housechef1.5 is Offline
| ID: 269504 | 171 Words
housechef1.5
Level: 38
POSTS: 45/280
POST EXP: 7876
LVL EXP: 354932
CP: 38.0
VIZ: 2036
POSTS: 45/280
POST EXP: 7876
LVL EXP: 354932
CP: 38.0
VIZ: 2036
Likes: 0 Dislikes: 0
Chuck Norris puts the FUN in FUNeral.
Chuck Norris doesn't get wet; wet gets chuck norris. Chuck Norris sleeps with a nightlight not because he is afraid of the dark, but because the dark is afraid of him. Black Holes are places where parallel universes are hiding from Chuck Norris. The saying "you never know" is only true if you aren't Chuck Norris. Earth was originally the first planet in the solar system, but Chuck Norris broke a sweat, so it is now the third. Giraffes did not exist........until Chuck Norris upper-cutted a horse. There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live. Chuck Norris does not sleep...He waits... Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs. I've got hundreds of these and could keep going so I'll just stop now if any of wants me to post some more just reply to this post asking for me to post more jokes.
|
Member
Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'
Registered: 09-19-10
Location: New Jersey
Last Post: 5673 days
Last Active: 5585 days
Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'
Registered: 09-19-10
Location: New Jersey
Last Post: 5673 days
Last Active: 5585 days
11-02-10 08:04 PM
JohnThePanpire is Offline
| ID: 269521 | 33 Words
JohnThePanpire is Offline
| ID: 269521 | 33 Words
JohnThePanpire
Level: 11
POSTS: 7/18
POST EXP: 289
LVL EXP: 5774
CP: 0.0
VIZ: 273
POSTS: 7/18
POST EXP: 289
LVL EXP: 5774
CP: 0.0
VIZ: 273
Likes: 0 Dislikes: 0
Chuck Norris doesn't do push ups, he pushes the world down.
Chuck Norris doesn't tea bag, he potato sacks. 
Behind Chuck Norris' beard in not a chin, but yet another fist. 
 Chuck Norris doesn't tea bag, he potato sacks.
Behind Chuck Norris' beard in not a chin, but yet another fist.
____________________ |
Member
Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'
Registered: 10-10-10
Last Post: 5692 days
Last Active: 5667 days
Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'
Registered: 10-10-10
Last Post: 5692 days
Last Active: 5667 days
11-02-10 10:55 PM
vizwiz123 is Offline
| ID: 269645 | 51 Words
vizwiz123 is Offline
| ID: 269645 | 51 Words
vizwiz123
Level: 169
POSTS: 3838/8818
POST EXP: 270846
LVL EXP: 63714224
CP: 2957.6
VIZ: 53934
POSTS: 3838/8818
POST EXP: 270846
LVL EXP: 63714224
CP: 2957.6
VIZ: 53934
Likes: 0 Dislikes: 0
The reason Chuck Norris doesn't take pictures of himself is because the camera is afraid of him.
Chuck Norris once kicked a dodo bird so hard that he killed the entire species. In Soviet Russia, Chuck Norris still kicks your ass. I have more, but I'll save them for later  Let the words of the Contra fan sink into your destructive mind....... Chuck Norris once kicked a dodo bird so hard that he killed the entire species. In Soviet Russia, Chuck Norris still kicks your ass. I have more, but I'll save them for later  >FACE OFF |
Vizzed Elite
Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'
Registered: 03-22-10
Location: The year 20XX.
Last Post: 1544 days
Last Active: 698 days
| <font color=yellow> mer Legendary Walrus of Vizzed, Former Underpants Gnome. Placed 1st in the October 2010 VCS! Hit O.P.S. Syndrome on 10/2/10! |
Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'
Registered: 03-22-10
Location: The year 20XX.
Last Post: 1544 days
Last Active: 698 days
11-03-10 03:12 AM
Zamiel is Offline
| ID: 269667 | 12 Words
Zamiel is Offline
| ID: 269667 | 12 Words
Zamiel
Level: 107
POSTS: 1927/3029
POST EXP: 119784
LVL EXP: 12880141
CP: 144.4
VIZ: 163750
POSTS: 1927/3029
POST EXP: 119784
LVL EXP: 12880141
CP: 144.4
VIZ: 163750
Likes: 0 Dislikes: 0
I think this belongs more in crazy house.
-moved to Crazy House-
|
Vizzed Elite
Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'
Registered: 01-31-10
Location: under your bed....
Last Post: 4638 days
Last Active: 4124 days
| Vizzed's Plague Doctor YOU EVIL LIBERAL NERDS...AND COMMIES |
Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'
Registered: 01-31-10
Location: under your bed....
Last Post: 4638 days
Last Active: 4124 days
11-13-10 04:58 PM
alexanyways is Offline
| ID: 274339 | 15 Words
alexanyways is Offline
| ID: 274339 | 15 Words
alexanyways
Level: 197
POSTS: 3838/12497
POST EXP: 610509
LVL EXP: 107725631
CP: 14766.0
VIZ: 155332
POSTS: 3838/12497
POST EXP: 610509
LVL EXP: 107725631
CP: 14766.0
VIZ: 155332
Likes: 0 Dislikes: 0
Sorry, but there's already one of these threads here.
https://www.vizzed.com/vizzedboard/thread.php?id=3202 I'm going to close this.
Vizzed Elite
Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome' Registered: 02-24-10 Last Post: 506 days Last Active: 501 days Links
Page Comments
Dove4JS - 12-12-20 05:26 AM
no image
joldboy70 - 07-10-20 11:13 AM
test
joldboy70 - 07-10-20 11:12 AM
test
savage23157 - 04-08-20 01:33 PM
Hi im new vizzed
zokuza - 11-18-19 09:08 AM
final got playstaion games unlock yes baby digimon world here i com
yoshirulez! - 02-10-17 08:45 PM
MAY MAYS
yoshirulez! - 02-10-17 08:45 PM
maymays
yoshirulez! - 02-07-17 11:13 PM
OwO what's this?
yoshirulez! - 02-07-17 11:13 PM
OwO what's this?
yoshirulez! - 02-07-17 11:13 PM
OwO what's this?
Footer
Vizzed.com © was created, designed, coded by & is property of: David Auchampach. All Rights Reserved 2002 - 2018.
728x90:Adsense,970x250:Adsense,300x250:Adsense,300x250:Adsense,120x600:Adsense,120x600Left:Adsense,120x600Right:Adsense,160x600:Adsense,160x600Left:Adsense,160x600Right:Adsense,300x600:Adsense,300x600Left:Adsense,300x600Right:Adsense, Page rendered in 0.025 seconds. Total queries executed: 56 Adblocker detected!Vizzed.com is very expensive to keep alive! The Ads pay for the servers. Vizzed has 3 TB worth of games and 1 TB worth of music. This site is free to use but the ads barely pay for the monthly server fees. If too many more people use ad block, the site cannot survive. We prioritize the community over the site profits. This is why we avoid using annoying (but high paying) ads like most other sites which include popups, obnoxious sounds and animations, malware, and other forms of intrusiveness. We'll do our part to never resort to these types of ads, please do your part by helping support this site by adding Vizzed.com to your ad blocking whitelist. | |||||||||||||
}
