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Changing or accepting your flaws?
Do you try changing the bad traits, or do you just accept them?
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Changing or accepting your flaws?

 

06-02-17 09:25 PM
Momo Aria is Offline
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Simple question I asked the discord server.

Everyone has a flaw, one way or another.

Do you try to change your own flaws to be a better person, or do you just accept those flaws because in the end, no one is perfect?

For most flaws I have, I only really try to work on my impatience. I'm patient sometimes, but in many circumstances, I really don't have patience. My other flaws... eh, I don't really bother. I just accept it as is, cuz I already know that no one can possibly be perfect. Also, through years of being forced to act a certain way that's deemed "perfect and acceptable" by my own relatives, I just flat out stopped and accepted the traits I have that people don't like about me, even to the point where I don't care anymore that my relatives have grown to disapprove of my behavior and interests. 

So, do you change your own flaws or just don't bother as is?
Simple question I asked the discord server.

Everyone has a flaw, one way or another.

Do you try to change your own flaws to be a better person, or do you just accept those flaws because in the end, no one is perfect?

For most flaws I have, I only really try to work on my impatience. I'm patient sometimes, but in many circumstances, I really don't have patience. My other flaws... eh, I don't really bother. I just accept it as is, cuz I already know that no one can possibly be perfect. Also, through years of being forced to act a certain way that's deemed "perfect and acceptable" by my own relatives, I just flat out stopped and accepted the traits I have that people don't like about me, even to the point where I don't care anymore that my relatives have grown to disapprove of my behavior and interests. 

So, do you change your own flaws or just don't bother as is?

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06-02-17 10:05 PM
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It depends on if you're referring to physical flaws or character flaws.

Mentally I think it's healthy to reflect on yourself in terms of how you act towards other people and keeping an open mind. If someone has criticisms of me I do try to think about and consider them. I'm a firm believer of self improvement and try to improve my discipline and health by eating healthily and keeping certain study habits. However I wouldn't change something fundamental about how I act just to please someone. If someone does not like the opinions I hold, then that's too bad for them. Everyone has flaws and just what is considered a flaw depends on which person you ask, something one person loves about you could be just what another person hates. I take into consideration what the people I care about say and try to make them happy if I can but I do not hinge on their constant approval. From experience I feel it is better to act based on what you personally think and feel happy rather than just conforming to the viewpoints of everyone else from fear of exclusion.

Physically I've come to terms with the things that bother me (as far as innate physical characteristics go). For example I have an overbite so for a long time I considered getting braces to change that. Rather than going through a complicated and long 3 year process just to have it corrected (which would be somewhat risky for me as well as I've had to parts of my front teeth replaced due to chipping them in the past) I decided against it. I would only be getting them to fit the mould of what is considered nice looking, not because I personally want to or because it's what is most physically healthy for me. Another thing that has often bothered me (and still does to some extent) is my curly hair. Any attempts I would make at styling it using hair spray and whatnot would still easily be messed up by even a light breeze. Eventually I gave up and decided just to work around it and it's actually working out quite well. While it may still bother me I could never imagine having a different look as it's part of what makes me unique as an individual. Looks in general are to a very large degree about perception.

It depends on if you're referring to physical flaws or character flaws.

Mentally I think it's healthy to reflect on yourself in terms of how you act towards other people and keeping an open mind. If someone has criticisms of me I do try to think about and consider them. I'm a firm believer of self improvement and try to improve my discipline and health by eating healthily and keeping certain study habits. However I wouldn't change something fundamental about how I act just to please someone. If someone does not like the opinions I hold, then that's too bad for them. Everyone has flaws and just what is considered a flaw depends on which person you ask, something one person loves about you could be just what another person hates. I take into consideration what the people I care about say and try to make them happy if I can but I do not hinge on their constant approval. From experience I feel it is better to act based on what you personally think and feel happy rather than just conforming to the viewpoints of everyone else from fear of exclusion.

Physically I've come to terms with the things that bother me (as far as innate physical characteristics go). For example I have an overbite so for a long time I considered getting braces to change that. Rather than going through a complicated and long 3 year process just to have it corrected (which would be somewhat risky for me as well as I've had to parts of my front teeth replaced due to chipping them in the past) I decided against it. I would only be getting them to fit the mould of what is considered nice looking, not because I personally want to or because it's what is most physically healthy for me. Another thing that has often bothered me (and still does to some extent) is my curly hair. Any attempts I would make at styling it using hair spray and whatnot would still easily be messed up by even a light breeze. Eventually I gave up and decided just to work around it and it's actually working out quite well. While it may still bother me I could never imagine having a different look as it's part of what makes me unique as an individual. Looks in general are to a very large degree about perception.

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06-02-17 10:11 PM
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No one can really be expected to be perfect, but there's nothing wrong with trying to work on flaws that you've recognized as such yourself. There's also a huge difference between trying to better yourself and being pressured to conform to whatever social standards there are in place. Some of them are there for a reason, others are silly. Don't tell yourself that you can't improve and don't let people turn you into what they want you to be.

No one can really be expected to be perfect, but there's nothing wrong with trying to work on flaws that you've recognized as such yourself. There's also a huge difference between trying to better yourself and being pressured to conform to whatever social standards there are in place. Some of them are there for a reason, others are silly. Don't tell yourself that you can't improve and don't let people turn you into what they want you to be.



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06-02-17 11:04 PM
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I've learned that when it comes to changing my flaws, it's best to focus on a few at a time instead of all of them. There are some flaws I don't bother with because I don't think they're a big concern compared to the others.

The flaws I do strive to change are often personality flaws. I don't like how sarcastic I've become in many instances so it's become a priority for me to take care of that before my sarcasm ends up hurting someone's feelings without me meaning to do that.

When it comes to flaws dealing with my appearance, I typically don't care near as much about them because they don't make up who I am as a person. Some days, especially when I'm running around outside a lot with my basketball, I'm unmotivated to keep combing my hair to fix it. It feels like entirely unnecessary effort that won't benefit me unless I need to dress fancy the next hour or get a picture with family or friends.

Finally, there are some flaws I've come to just accept because I know I can't change them no matter how well I try to hide them. For example, I almost always have awkwardness or simplicity in conversations with people and I struggle to keep them going for long periods of time with most subjects. No matter how much I learn about socializing, that happens because it's part of who I am. This has to do with why I really like participating in discussions on vizzed! It's so much easier in a forum setting where there are threads sticking to a certain topic I'm interested in. If I have nothing to say, I can just hit the "Like" button and leave instead of dealing with an awkward pause XD
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I've learned that when it comes to changing my flaws, it's best to focus on a few at a time instead of all of them. There are some flaws I don't bother with because I don't think they're a big concern compared to the others.

The flaws I do strive to change are often personality flaws. I don't like how sarcastic I've become in many instances so it's become a priority for me to take care of that before my sarcasm ends up hurting someone's feelings without me meaning to do that.

When it comes to flaws dealing with my appearance, I typically don't care near as much about them because they don't make up who I am as a person. Some days, especially when I'm running around outside a lot with my basketball, I'm unmotivated to keep combing my hair to fix it. It feels like entirely unnecessary effort that won't benefit me unless I need to dress fancy the next hour or get a picture with family or friends.

Finally, there are some flaws I've come to just accept because I know I can't change them no matter how well I try to hide them. For example, I almost always have awkwardness or simplicity in conversations with people and I struggle to keep them going for long periods of time with most subjects. No matter how much I learn about socializing, that happens because it's part of who I am. This has to do with why I really like participating in discussions on vizzed! It's so much easier in a forum setting where there are threads sticking to a certain topic I'm interested in. If I have nothing to say, I can just hit the "Like" button and leave instead of dealing with an awkward pause XD

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06-03-17 12:13 AM
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The moment you stop trying to better yourself is the moment that you stop advancing in life.

I will change myself for the better, for as long as I'm alive. There is no character flaw you shouldn't try to fix, regardless of how impossible it seems.

There is no sense in giving up because something is hard.
The moment you stop trying to better yourself is the moment that you stop advancing in life.

I will change myself for the better, for as long as I'm alive. There is no character flaw you shouldn't try to fix, regardless of how impossible it seems.

There is no sense in giving up because something is hard.

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06-03-17 12:44 AM
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I have made many mistakes in my life, I have tried to improve myself by not doing them again. I try my best to become a better person regardless of how hard it is to do.
I have made many mistakes in my life, I have tried to improve myself by not doing them again. I try my best to become a better person regardless of how hard it is to do.

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06-03-17 11:09 AM
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You have to just try to be yourself. Everyone has flaws. Yes, you can try to strengthen your weaknesses. In my case, I just don't bother because I can try to work on...like procrastinating is probably my biggest weakness. No matter how hard I try to make it better, it will always catch up to me in the end, and I'll be right back to square one.

I have always believed nobody is perfect. And sometimes, you just have to accept it.
You have to just try to be yourself. Everyone has flaws. Yes, you can try to strengthen your weaknesses. In my case, I just don't bother because I can try to work on...like procrastinating is probably my biggest weakness. No matter how hard I try to make it better, it will always catch up to me in the end, and I'll be right back to square one.

I have always believed nobody is perfect. And sometimes, you just have to accept it.

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06-03-17 02:41 PM
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I don't ever bother to change a flaw unless it is a flaw to me, I live by that. Procrastination, though, procrastination and losing focus is probably the biggest flaw I have! I almost screwed myself over big time this school year! Not that I almost like failed or anything, but I almost got myself kicked out of this really important Bacculeratte program! My teachers caught on to the fact that it wasn't hard for me to understand the information, I just was not caring enough about the work I needed the information for, which was even worse. It drives my parents crazy too; I was gifted with a really great blessing, my high intellect, but I was also cursed with a mild case of A.D.D. Now I shouldn't use that as an excuse because it's not a good one, butI just makes it really hard for me to focus already. Procrastination didn't really become a problem for me until after I went through this "middle school depression" I guess you could call it. During that depression, I decided to just stop caring. It helped a lot like it helped me develop my originality because I no longer cared and stress over what others thought of me (for more information, visit my thread https://www.vizzed.com/boards/thread.php?id=99228). Now that was great and everything, but I stopped caring about EVERYTHING, including my grades and that harmed me really bad! As if my A.D.D. wasn't already bad enough, I had decided to stop caring about school. The lesson learned was balancing. You can't care about everything, nor can you care for nothing at all... only care for the things that truly matter to you. Even now I'm still trying to recover and focus on caring about the important things in life I need to care about. Not only that, but I have developed some sort of an addiction to procrastination because of my stupid decision! ;( Anyways, yes I do have to work on my focus and procrastination flaw, but I think that's the only flaw I'm going to worry about since it actually harming me goal-wise. Physical flaws, I don't usually worry about, though, it's just the mental ones! XD

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I don't ever bother to change a flaw unless it is a flaw to me, I live by that. Procrastination, though, procrastination and losing focus is probably the biggest flaw I have! I almost screwed myself over big time this school year! Not that I almost like failed or anything, but I almost got myself kicked out of this really important Bacculeratte program! My teachers caught on to the fact that it wasn't hard for me to understand the information, I just was not caring enough about the work I needed the information for, which was even worse. It drives my parents crazy too; I was gifted with a really great blessing, my high intellect, but I was also cursed with a mild case of A.D.D. Now I shouldn't use that as an excuse because it's not a good one, butI just makes it really hard for me to focus already. Procrastination didn't really become a problem for me until after I went through this "middle school depression" I guess you could call it. During that depression, I decided to just stop caring. It helped a lot like it helped me develop my originality because I no longer cared and stress over what others thought of me (for more information, visit my thread https://www.vizzed.com/boards/thread.php?id=99228). Now that was great and everything, but I stopped caring about EVERYTHING, including my grades and that harmed me really bad! As if my A.D.D. wasn't already bad enough, I had decided to stop caring about school. The lesson learned was balancing. You can't care about everything, nor can you care for nothing at all... only care for the things that truly matter to you. Even now I'm still trying to recover and focus on caring about the important things in life I need to care about. Not only that, but I have developed some sort of an addiction to procrastination because of my stupid decision! ;( Anyways, yes I do have to work on my focus and procrastination flaw, but I think that's the only flaw I'm going to worry about since it actually harming me goal-wise. Physical flaws, I don't usually worry about, though, it's just the mental ones! XD

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06-03-17 04:15 PM
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I do have some flaws, but I've eventually grown to accept them. I've tried to battle against them, but in the end I'm just me and I can't change that fact. 

What I should probably fight is my laziness, though it's something I can easily bypass when I have motivation. When I don't, I simply have to force myself, and while it comes with consequences a little break from everything helps a lot. It's basically what's going to happen this June with finals: I'm not motivated to study, I'll have to force myself to it and once they're over I'll need a couple days off everything to be me again.

Another flaw I'm trying to fix is my shyness. I tend to be on my own, but over time I've learnt to open up. I'm doing this through experience, so there are still many things I have to fix because I haven't experienced them. I know I won't overcome it, but at least I can keep it to a minimum if it's just for new experiences.

Besides that, there's nothing else I can change. My other flaws will be with me forever, and I've accepted it. I only try to not let them interfere with my life, because they almost killed me in the past. As long as my positive things outweigh my flaws, everything will be alright.
I do have some flaws, but I've eventually grown to accept them. I've tried to battle against them, but in the end I'm just me and I can't change that fact. 

What I should probably fight is my laziness, though it's something I can easily bypass when I have motivation. When I don't, I simply have to force myself, and while it comes with consequences a little break from everything helps a lot. It's basically what's going to happen this June with finals: I'm not motivated to study, I'll have to force myself to it and once they're over I'll need a couple days off everything to be me again.

Another flaw I'm trying to fix is my shyness. I tend to be on my own, but over time I've learnt to open up. I'm doing this through experience, so there are still many things I have to fix because I haven't experienced them. I know I won't overcome it, but at least I can keep it to a minimum if it's just for new experiences.

Besides that, there's nothing else I can change. My other flaws will be with me forever, and I've accepted it. I only try to not let them interfere with my life, because they almost killed me in the past. As long as my positive things outweigh my flaws, everything will be alright.

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06-03-17 04:25 PM
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Most of my flaws can be fixed by me working on them. They are certain flaws I will most likely not be able to fix or are not that important.
Most of my flaws can be fixed by me working on them. They are certain flaws I will most likely not be able to fix or are not that important.

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