Hey everyone. So after having a peaceful saturday with my mom and siblings, we were just about ready to hit the sack, but then suddenly we heard a loud knock at the front door. And guess who it was. My abusive and bipolar stepfather. He seeked out my mom after his own mother kicked him out for his aggressive behavior. Fear almost instantly went down my spine. And so he started saying that he has nowhere else left to go, and now is demanding that my mom opens the door and let him crash there until he finds a place to live. I pleased with my mom not to open the door for that man, but she apparently feels guilty about him having no place left to go. She actually let him in. Despair and anguish ran into me when she did. I gave my grandmother a call and asked if she could pick me up, and she said yes. I love my mother deeply, but I just can't take this insanity anymore. Right now I'm so sad right now. I...I can feel tears forming in my eyes. This man has caused me so much pain since I was only a litte child. And what my mom did today has hurt me greatly. I'm sorry for posting this everyone. Its just that the sight of this man brings out a lot of raw emotions within me, and I have no one else left to turn to in my life except the community here on vizzed.

I know how you feel, and I don't really know how to help you in this situation either, since I'm currently going through a similar situation. I hope things get better for you. Let me know of any updates if anything happens to come up.

LunarDarkness2 : Thanks, lunar. I don't know how I can help myself in this situation, either. But I feel a little better knowing that you're here for me, though.

Stay strong. The worse thing is something like that to happen. It was very good of you to ask your grandmother to pick you up. Your mother just made the worse descion...it will affect you and your family as well. The best thing to do now is somehow find a way to get him out of the house. And I know that won't be an easy task....

Final Weapon : I knowz how you feelz in this situation granted I've never had a step father but I know what it is like to fear a parent ... I lovez both of my parents don't getz me wrong but sometimes I'm afraid of them because of the punishments they have given me in the past ... I shall not speak of any of the punishments I've been through because it would just dig up bad memories

as far as that a** h**e of a step-father goes I'd ask your grandma if you can stay with her until the jerk is gone from the house for good ... I don't think she'd say no to letting you stay with her if she knew how terrified you were of him >.>

I do feelz sorryz that your having to go through this since you mom is too blind to see how much pain and fear you feelz each time your step-father comes around and that she always pities the jerk even knowing the reason why his own mother kicked him out was because of his violent behavior

in any case if you need someone to talk to aboutz it or want some comfort feelz free to come and talk to me I'm always here to help you if you need me since that is what good friends are for after all

Eniitan : Yes, you're right, enittan. I have to stay strong and keep my cool even in a seemly hopeless situation like this. Unfortunately though, there is very little I can do. My mom hates my grandma and even her own mother, so she probably would not listen to either of them. I would not say my stepfather is entirely a bad person, but he needs a lot of help before we even consider about being a family. My mom tried to persuade him to seek mental treatments, but he was very stubborn and refused every time. As of now, I'm concerned for my mom's safety. Save for my siblings, she is all along in that place with him now. I fear that he is going to hit her or worse. Being bipolar, he can be unpredictable at times which worries me even more.

Final Weapon : Okay then... I guess i'm not the only person with a very agressive (step)father.
I know that feeling when you're abused when you were a child. To be honest, i am abused by my autistic father when i was 1.5 years old. That man was crazy, and lucky him he is now homeless and can stay a little while at some sort of institute.

Anyway, back to THIS situation...
I am on your side as always: If you want advice, perhaps i can give you some. Just PM me.

Also, i am sure your grandma will be nice to you. Not that i thought she won't, but... Anyway, it's just that you can try to send an E-Mail to your mother (If possible) to keep contact. Maybe that helps if you like your mother a lot. If you don't, never mind what i said then.

(P.S: I haven't been reading your reply to Eniitan yet. I would say, try the following for the safety of your family (And don't blame me on this because it may work or it may fail a lot): I know there are a lot of psychiatrists out there, if you know one or someone who can help in these kind of situations, try to talk about it with him. And if he tries to do something like that again, i don't know if you have the courage and the chance to do this, but say that he needs to stop and/or calm down. I have a feeling this is not my best advice, but i just want to help you.

Don't worry. Your stepfather probably won't stay that long. I can relate, because I had an abusive parent who disciplined me at the sight of anything. Keep an open mind and relax; your troubles will be over soon. As long as you stand up for yourself, nothing can go wrong.

Don't feel guilty about getting out of the house. You need to keep yourself safe (physically and emotionally), and your grandmother acknowledges that, too. The fact he's able to manipulate your mother shows that he may not be leaving as soon as expected. It would probably be best to stay with your grandmother for a bit if you can until you start to heal from this.

This might seem a bit harsh but aren't you 23? Man up and keep the guy out of your house?

I guess if your mom isn't going to agree with you on that though then it might be best to be somewhere else. At least you are safe. Might be time to move out though if you can. I couldn't imagine still being stuck at the whims of my parents.

I'm sorry to hear that dude. I'm having issues with my parents as well, but not nearly to the extent that you are. I hope things will get better for you and I'll keep you in my prayers. 

I wanted to say something. You apologized for making this thread. I see no need to apologize for making this thread. The threads that people have issues with are the ones where you say you're leaving or something like that. This is a legit life problem, and people can give advice and/or encourage you. 

Another thing. I have a question. You said you were staying with your grandmother after your step-father came into your mom's house. Is that grandmother the mother of your step-father. Was she the one who kicked your step-father out?

Final Weapon : I am really sorry for the late reply I was busy today. I got tired to the point I had to sleep and recover. I can understand. Why your step-father is abusive because of his condition. Its sad he didn't seek the help he needed because he is a stubborn man. It best that you and your siblings stay away from him for now. For your own safety I mean I wouldn't want to see you guys take a beating for no reason. Then plan a way to take him out of the house. As for your mother...I already feel sorry for her. Even though she was the one who let him in. I can tell the man is not a bad person. But having that condition makes his behaviour to go wild causing him to be abusive...

MrBeingcool1 : Thanks, cool. To me, the fact that you offered to give me advice at all shows that you truly care. That means a lot to me.

Ultrajeff : This happens to me every year. He usually doesn't stay for very long. My mom eventually gets tried of his attribute and kicks him out eventually and then takes him back at a later time. Whether if its a week, month, or year. You know, a cycle like that.

plasticinanity: I think staying with another relative when it comes to things like this between my parents would be best, too, plastic. Its just that my mom would often put pressure on me when I try to leave by threating to call a mental hospital on me, or use my siblings and my home school work as a means to keep me bound there.

geeogree : Actually, I'm 19. Sorry for lying about my age. I wanted to get a huge amount of Viz when I first registered, and did not think it was too big of a deal. Anyway, my stepfather is around 37, I think. He's really opposing to me, g. I'm not into violence, either. geeogree, do you think I should call the police next him I feel like he seriously going to hurt my mom? Around two years ago he and my mom got into argument that got out of hand. It ended with him hitting my mom. I was in my room with my siblings and my mom screamed at me and told me not to get involved. I felt powerless to do a thing. I didn't have a cell phone, so I couldn't call the police. Memories of that frightening day still continue to haunt me. Every time I think about I feel like a worthless coward. It destroyed me over the following years. I couldn't function right in school and often got bullied by other children. At some point, I find myself getting into fights. My mom ultimately made a decision that home school would be much better for me.

RDay13 : Thanks, rd. I was afraid by creating this thread, I would be starting up some drama again. Glad that's not the case this time. About your question, it was my stepfather's mother that kicked him out of her house. Apparently, he was having some kind of outburst that even she was not willing to put up with this time.

Eniitan : No worries, en. I just called my mom a few minutes ago, she said that he is no longer there and she told him to leave because she didn't want him there with all that arguing and confusion. So I'll be heading back soon today. I'm going to talk with her about this when I arrive home. Enough is enough already.