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What did your parents do that you won't?

 

03-25-16 05:12 PM
0ddie is Offline
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What are things your parents did to you or taught you that you won't do to or teach your own children?
I'm actually quite happy with the way my mother raised me and I don't really wish she would have done anything differently. The one thing I can think of is that I sometimes wish that she had been a little more pushy towards the teachers I had. I was a smart child and I never got the help I needed in school to learn things at a faster pace. Instead I was stuck with a really slow pace and only "learning" things I already knew for many years which caused me to feel meaningless and depressed. I know she did what she could and being a single mother is hard sometimes.  I know she was afraid people would think she was pushing me and think that she was a bad mother. If I ever have kids, no matter if I raise them alone like she did or not, I'll never let them go through the same thing as I did. 
So what will you do different from what your parents did?
What are things your parents did to you or taught you that you won't do to or teach your own children?
I'm actually quite happy with the way my mother raised me and I don't really wish she would have done anything differently. The one thing I can think of is that I sometimes wish that she had been a little more pushy towards the teachers I had. I was a smart child and I never got the help I needed in school to learn things at a faster pace. Instead I was stuck with a really slow pace and only "learning" things I already knew for many years which caused me to feel meaningless and depressed. I know she did what she could and being a single mother is hard sometimes.  I know she was afraid people would think she was pushing me and think that she was a bad mother. If I ever have kids, no matter if I raise them alone like she did or not, I'll never let them go through the same thing as I did. 
So what will you do different from what your parents did?
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03-25-16 06:04 PM
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I was raised by a single mother as well and considering the life she was able to create for me and the moral values she instilled in me despite the challenges she faced I would say she did a very good job and I couldn't have asked for much more from her. Perhaps the stand out things to me would be that I would try to avoid drinking and smoking infront of my children if I have any. Not only because I don't really have an interest in doing so but because in the case of smoking, second hand smoking is a real health risk especially for young children, and also because in both cases I would say it sets a bad example for a child.

Other than that I suppose let me have had more choice in terms of my own schooling. I was essentially able to skip a grade early on which was something I wanted at the time it happened, but she decided against it without ever telling me about it. I didn't find out I had the opportunity to do so until a few years ago. I was very young at the time so I understand why she decided to make the decision for me but I still think I should've at least been asked about it. That's something very specific to me growing up and doesn't really matter that much now though.
I was raised by a single mother as well and considering the life she was able to create for me and the moral values she instilled in me despite the challenges she faced I would say she did a very good job and I couldn't have asked for much more from her. Perhaps the stand out things to me would be that I would try to avoid drinking and smoking infront of my children if I have any. Not only because I don't really have an interest in doing so but because in the case of smoking, second hand smoking is a real health risk especially for young children, and also because in both cases I would say it sets a bad example for a child.

Other than that I suppose let me have had more choice in terms of my own schooling. I was essentially able to skip a grade early on which was something I wanted at the time it happened, but she decided against it without ever telling me about it. I didn't find out I had the opportunity to do so until a few years ago. I was very young at the time so I understand why she decided to make the decision for me but I still think I should've at least been asked about it. That's something very specific to me growing up and doesn't really matter that much now though.
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(edited by Zlinqx on 03-25-16 06:05 PM)     Post Rating: 1   Liked By: ghostrunner,

03-26-16 12:32 AM
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I won't uphold bulls*** meaningless values that just suffocate the creativity or personality of my children like my parents to. They'll be more like themselves and less like me.

I'd also not lie. Lying is bad. If they find out you lied, they'll get the idea lying is justified because you did it. Which is wrong.

I'd also not punish my kids for telling the truth. I would find some way to make them understand that what they did is bad, but telling the truth was good.

I'd also be less invasive, I wouldn't shove my own agenda in their faces, and I wouldn't get pissed over stupid things like my parents do.

That was a lot of angst. I am angsty here have my angst

Plenty of angst to go around

asdfasffadsfgsa
I won't uphold bulls*** meaningless values that just suffocate the creativity or personality of my children like my parents to. They'll be more like themselves and less like me.

I'd also not lie. Lying is bad. If they find out you lied, they'll get the idea lying is justified because you did it. Which is wrong.

I'd also not punish my kids for telling the truth. I would find some way to make them understand that what they did is bad, but telling the truth was good.

I'd also be less invasive, I wouldn't shove my own agenda in their faces, and I wouldn't get pissed over stupid things like my parents do.

That was a lot of angst. I am angsty here have my angst

Plenty of angst to go around

asdfasffadsfgsa
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03-26-16 01:28 AM
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For my kids I'll make sure that they never have to feel like this isn't there house.  I grew up with my mother, step father, and half sister.  It was always made pretty clear to me that I was living in another man's home and he was the one bringing in the money.  Nothing major just situations where I was a growing boy and I would still be hungry and want seconds, but those seconds would be reserved for my step father so that he could have them for lunch the next day.  The other part of it was that it was made very clear to me that as soon as I turned 18 I would be looking for my own place to live and in the meantime I would be paying 80 dollars a week to help support the house.  I learned a lot of hard lessons growing up and the things that I wanted I ended up getting with my own money since I had a paper route from the time I was 12.  These lessons hardened me to a certain degree and I want my children to have it better than I did, but I also want them to have a survivor's mentality and know what it's like to have to earn the things you want in life.  I've decided with my wife that the main thing we will change is the whole eating thing.  If either of my kids are still hungry then I don't care if I have to eat something else or even feed them off my own plate they will have plenty.  After that I'll just have to make sure that they get plenty of exercise so they don't get obese.
For my kids I'll make sure that they never have to feel like this isn't there house.  I grew up with my mother, step father, and half sister.  It was always made pretty clear to me that I was living in another man's home and he was the one bringing in the money.  Nothing major just situations where I was a growing boy and I would still be hungry and want seconds, but those seconds would be reserved for my step father so that he could have them for lunch the next day.  The other part of it was that it was made very clear to me that as soon as I turned 18 I would be looking for my own place to live and in the meantime I would be paying 80 dollars a week to help support the house.  I learned a lot of hard lessons growing up and the things that I wanted I ended up getting with my own money since I had a paper route from the time I was 12.  These lessons hardened me to a certain degree and I want my children to have it better than I did, but I also want them to have a survivor's mentality and know what it's like to have to earn the things you want in life.  I've decided with my wife that the main thing we will change is the whole eating thing.  If either of my kids are still hungry then I don't care if I have to eat something else or even feed them off my own plate they will have plenty.  After that I'll just have to make sure that they get plenty of exercise so they don't get obese.
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03-26-16 04:19 AM
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Zlinqx : I totally agree with you about the smoking and drinking. My mother doesn't drink at all, she used to smoke but she quit when she found out she was pregnant. I especially think that drinking in front of children sets a very bad example. 

yoshirulez! : Awww, *hugs*. That's a lot of angst alright... I'm sorry you've had/have to go through these things during your childhood. Still, I guess you've learned a lot and these things have made you into the wonderful person you are today!

ghostrunner : I can't imagine what that must have felt like... My mother always made sure that I was satisfied when I left the dinner table, even though our economy hasn't always been the best. It's really important to keep your children well fed and happy, but ofc, exercise is important too.
Zlinqx : I totally agree with you about the smoking and drinking. My mother doesn't drink at all, she used to smoke but she quit when she found out she was pregnant. I especially think that drinking in front of children sets a very bad example. 

yoshirulez! : Awww, *hugs*. That's a lot of angst alright... I'm sorry you've had/have to go through these things during your childhood. Still, I guess you've learned a lot and these things have made you into the wonderful person you are today!

ghostrunner : I can't imagine what that must have felt like... My mother always made sure that I was satisfied when I left the dinner table, even though our economy hasn't always been the best. It's really important to keep your children well fed and happy, but ofc, exercise is important too.
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03-26-16 09:16 AM
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I would try to be more understanding of what my kids are saying. Also, I
would make a genuine effort to have things in common with my kids. Like
playing video games with them, or seeing  what else they like. I also
wouldn't lie so much, or get mad incredibly easy. Or baby the heck out
of the younger siblings, even though they were much more harsh, and
expected more out of the older ones when we were the younger siblings
ages... >.> I also won't overreact to literally every problem that
is brought to my attention either.

Don't get that rant wrong. My
parents are great at times. It's just, they put their own problems and
their own stress before mine or my siblings. They are great at times,
but...they are far from perfect. I know they care, but at the same time,
I know how much they really don't. Like constantly telling me that I
was NOT loved when I was around 12, or bragging about the time that I
had the snot beaten out of me for something that wasn't even my fault.
Things like that make me feel alone, and just how much they really care. And that's not what I want for my kids. I want them to know they are loved, and they are safe with me no matter what. Although there are people here that have it MUCH worse than I do.
I would try to be more understanding of what my kids are saying. Also, I
would make a genuine effort to have things in common with my kids. Like
playing video games with them, or seeing  what else they like. I also
wouldn't lie so much, or get mad incredibly easy. Or baby the heck out
of the younger siblings, even though they were much more harsh, and
expected more out of the older ones when we were the younger siblings
ages... >.> I also won't overreact to literally every problem that
is brought to my attention either.

Don't get that rant wrong. My
parents are great at times. It's just, they put their own problems and
their own stress before mine or my siblings. They are great at times,
but...they are far from perfect. I know they care, but at the same time,
I know how much they really don't. Like constantly telling me that I
was NOT loved when I was around 12, or bragging about the time that I
had the snot beaten out of me for something that wasn't even my fault.
Things like that make me feel alone, and just how much they really care. And that's not what I want for my kids. I want them to know they are loved, and they are safe with me no matter what. Although there are people here that have it MUCH worse than I do.
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03-27-16 11:40 PM
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There are a few things I would do differently.

1) My dad worked a lot so he wasn't around when I was a teenager so I don't feel like I had much of a relationship with him at that time. I've since remedied that and I've made efforts to hang out with him and take time to talk to him and build a friendship but when I was a teen it was tough not having him around much. I've tried to be around more for my kids.

2) I'm going to try and be more calm with my teenagers (when they get there). I remember when my older siblings were teenagers and my parents were insane with them. Not as bad with me because I was the youngest and I didn't act out as much as they did. I hope that I can develop a good relationship with my kids so that when they are teenagers we can have open dialogue about what they want to be and the choices they are making. I know I can't run their lives forever (and I don't want to) but I also want to have influence for as long as I can.
There are a few things I would do differently.

1) My dad worked a lot so he wasn't around when I was a teenager so I don't feel like I had much of a relationship with him at that time. I've since remedied that and I've made efforts to hang out with him and take time to talk to him and build a friendship but when I was a teen it was tough not having him around much. I've tried to be around more for my kids.

2) I'm going to try and be more calm with my teenagers (when they get there). I remember when my older siblings were teenagers and my parents were insane with them. Not as bad with me because I was the youngest and I didn't act out as much as they did. I hope that I can develop a good relationship with my kids so that when they are teenagers we can have open dialogue about what they want to be and the choices they are making. I know I can't run their lives forever (and I don't want to) but I also want to have influence for as long as I can.
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03-28-16 12:59 PM
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A lot. I'll start by saying my parents did the best with the tools they had at the time (both came from dysfunctional alcoholic homes) but their parenting was... mediocre at best.

I'm lucky in the sense I kind of get to practice this a bit now (my niece) and one thing I do is uphold my promises. If I say we're going to do something, we do it. There's been a few times where life just happens and something else comes up, but for the most part I stick to what I say. I grew up around a lot of broken promises, and i grew accustomed to just assuming that what was offered wasn't going to happen. 
A lot. I'll start by saying my parents did the best with the tools they had at the time (both came from dysfunctional alcoholic homes) but their parenting was... mediocre at best.

I'm lucky in the sense I kind of get to practice this a bit now (my niece) and one thing I do is uphold my promises. If I say we're going to do something, we do it. There's been a few times where life just happens and something else comes up, but for the most part I stick to what I say. I grew up around a lot of broken promises, and i grew accustomed to just assuming that what was offered wasn't going to happen. 
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03-28-16 01:19 PM
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I love my parents, I really do, and I'm grateful for how hard they worked to keep a roof over me and my sister's heads. They weren't always the best parents, but they loved us both and never stopped supporting us in whatever direction we chose to go.

The only things I would change in what I teach my kids would be, for one, proper communication. An argument should not be the only way you know how to get your point across and raising your voice, even in increments, doesn't work for every situation.

And I would try my damnedest not to jump immediately to criticizing comments when my kid does something wrong. It's difficult to want to do anything right when you feel like they are going to find faults with it regardless. I get it, sometimes people slack off on their chores, but you deal with that when it happens and not treat every little thing they do as if they did it improperly.
I love my parents, I really do, and I'm grateful for how hard they worked to keep a roof over me and my sister's heads. They weren't always the best parents, but they loved us both and never stopped supporting us in whatever direction we chose to go.

The only things I would change in what I teach my kids would be, for one, proper communication. An argument should not be the only way you know how to get your point across and raising your voice, even in increments, doesn't work for every situation.

And I would try my damnedest not to jump immediately to criticizing comments when my kid does something wrong. It's difficult to want to do anything right when you feel like they are going to find faults with it regardless. I get it, sometimes people slack off on their chores, but you deal with that when it happens and not treat every little thing they do as if they did it improperly.
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03-28-16 02:20 PM
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0ddie : I agree with plasticinsanity on the keeping of promises growing up my mom made sure never to tellz me anything as a promise that wasn't going to happen at some point down the road ... I was a bit of a hard child and if you broke your promise to me yes I got very angry with you though I didn't leave you without a way of making it up to me that would make me forgive the broken promise like treating me to my favorite food as a way of saying sorryz to me and promising to do what you said you would do at a later date ... I'm very understanding person even as a child that things happen and sometimes a promise might get broken due to unexpected things coming up
 

I'd teach my kids if I have any to always keep to their promises though also to keep a schedule and make sure not to make too many promises that might interfere with each other and cause them to spread themselves too thin amongst their friends and cause them to get stressed out and upset

I also agree with yoshirulez! there is alot of BS rulez and values in society that I won't teach my kids if I have any because I believe everyone should be allowed to show their creativity and let their imagination soar higher then the skies because lets face it later on more often then not people lose that aboutz themselves and start to become robots that society controls without mercy and then they lose some of their personality that made them the happyz unique person they are
0ddie : I agree with plasticinsanity on the keeping of promises growing up my mom made sure never to tellz me anything as a promise that wasn't going to happen at some point down the road ... I was a bit of a hard child and if you broke your promise to me yes I got very angry with you though I didn't leave you without a way of making it up to me that would make me forgive the broken promise like treating me to my favorite food as a way of saying sorryz to me and promising to do what you said you would do at a later date ... I'm very understanding person even as a child that things happen and sometimes a promise might get broken due to unexpected things coming up
 

I'd teach my kids if I have any to always keep to their promises though also to keep a schedule and make sure not to make too many promises that might interfere with each other and cause them to spread themselves too thin amongst their friends and cause them to get stressed out and upset

I also agree with yoshirulez! there is alot of BS rulez and values in society that I won't teach my kids if I have any because I believe everyone should be allowed to show their creativity and let their imagination soar higher then the skies because lets face it later on more often then not people lose that aboutz themselves and start to become robots that society controls without mercy and then they lose some of their personality that made them the happyz unique person they are
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03-28-16 09:08 PM
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Don't get me wrong, my parents really did their best.
The one thing I would have to do differently is not being a hypocrite. Not holding my kid's to any standard I wouldn't hold myself to as well. For instance, my parents have always been casual pot smokers (smoke every once in a while), and my mom drinks on a nightly basis since I was 13. Despite this, when I smoked pot in high school, my parents sold my car and got me fired from my job to try and keep me away from it. Granted, they helped me get the car and the title was in their name, but I had paid them back fully for it, and I didn't get anything when they sold it. I basically spent $4200 dollars to borrow a car for six months. I was on top of my school work and had no problems paying my bills (including $300 rent at 16), but just because they do it, doesn't mean I should be able to, right?
That was my biggest issue.
Don't get me wrong, my parents really did their best.
The one thing I would have to do differently is not being a hypocrite. Not holding my kid's to any standard I wouldn't hold myself to as well. For instance, my parents have always been casual pot smokers (smoke every once in a while), and my mom drinks on a nightly basis since I was 13. Despite this, when I smoked pot in high school, my parents sold my car and got me fired from my job to try and keep me away from it. Granted, they helped me get the car and the title was in their name, but I had paid them back fully for it, and I didn't get anything when they sold it. I basically spent $4200 dollars to borrow a car for six months. I was on top of my school work and had no problems paying my bills (including $300 rent at 16), but just because they do it, doesn't mean I should be able to, right?
That was my biggest issue.
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03-30-16 03:29 AM
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Smoking until my lungs are dead. Thats a thing i absolutely do not want to do, let go teach my kids if i have them later on.
Smoking until my lungs are dead. Thats a thing i absolutely do not want to do, let go teach my kids if i have them later on.
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04-02-16 10:26 AM
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- I never as much as tried to smoke a cigarette in my entire life. My father smoked most of his; he eventually smoked outside year round. I think cigarette mostly disgusted me because of the terrible smell of family reunions for New Year's day. It felt like going to Beijing or Shanghai.

- I realized in time that my life habits were terrible and that I was going to become obese like my father (I went to pant size 36; now down to 29-30). I think I now have the right balanced diet and exercise so I can maintain the body I have.

- Should I ever have children, I will NOT strike them. That created fear, not respect, towards my father that way. I might scream at them if they do something absolutely awful (I can have a thundering voice), but never hit them. Children are humans, i.e. capable or reason. I will try to make them think about what they did, why they did it and why it's wrong.
- I never as much as tried to smoke a cigarette in my entire life. My father smoked most of his; he eventually smoked outside year round. I think cigarette mostly disgusted me because of the terrible smell of family reunions for New Year's day. It felt like going to Beijing or Shanghai.

- I realized in time that my life habits were terrible and that I was going to become obese like my father (I went to pant size 36; now down to 29-30). I think I now have the right balanced diet and exercise so I can maintain the body I have.

- Should I ever have children, I will NOT strike them. That created fear, not respect, towards my father that way. I might scream at them if they do something absolutely awful (I can have a thundering voice), but never hit them. Children are humans, i.e. capable or reason. I will try to make them think about what they did, why they did it and why it's wrong.
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My parents seem to be very much against immigration. They just don't like "illegal aliens" coming into America. I, on the other hand, believe that no human being is illegal and has just as much right to live in the USA as any American. So something I want to teach my children is to be respectful of other peoples races and religions.
My parents seem to be very much against immigration. They just don't like "illegal aliens" coming into America. I, on the other hand, believe that no human being is illegal and has just as much right to live in the USA as any American. So something I want to teach my children is to be respectful of other peoples races and religions.
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04-02-16 10:56 AM
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I was rasied by a single mother, and my biological father left us at a young age, so there isn't much I can say regarding this topic.

Well, my stepfather tried teaching me to be more respectful towards him. I did not, though. He has caused me, my mother, brother, and sister so much unnecessary problems in our lives. I could never find it in me to ever respect someone like that, and don't envision myself teaching my own children how to be respectful towards him either if I do get married some day.
I was rasied by a single mother, and my biological father left us at a young age, so there isn't much I can say regarding this topic.

Well, my stepfather tried teaching me to be more respectful towards him. I did not, though. He has caused me, my mother, brother, and sister so much unnecessary problems in our lives. I could never find it in me to ever respect someone like that, and don't envision myself teaching my own children how to be respectful towards him either if I do get married some day.
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04-02-16 03:03 PM
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I refuse to be under a particular influence that causes me to make the wrong choices in life which falls under the smoking category but I appreciate my parents falling under the influence because it taught me that there are good and bad choices in life which not only leads you to be under the influence but also due to the bad choice you made in life it causes others to be influenced by you into making the wrong choices in life. The choices you make impact whether you to ruin your life and perhaps another individuals life. Just because I say I'm never gonna smoke doesn't mean it never will happen perhaps I'm already under the influence. Parents are the most influential people to have ever lived in my opinion.
I refuse to be under a particular influence that causes me to make the wrong choices in life which falls under the smoking category but I appreciate my parents falling under the influence because it taught me that there are good and bad choices in life which not only leads you to be under the influence but also due to the bad choice you made in life it causes others to be influenced by you into making the wrong choices in life. The choices you make impact whether you to ruin your life and perhaps another individuals life. Just because I say I'm never gonna smoke doesn't mean it never will happen perhaps I'm already under the influence. Parents are the most influential people to have ever lived in my opinion.
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06-01-16 08:03 AM
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My parents are meh, and haven't been that good lately, so I'd have to say there are a lot of things that my parents did that I won't do. 

First of all, I wouldn't brag about my kids to others, and then proceed to yell at them 75% of the time at home when no one else is around to see it. I hate being bragged about, because I'm not a big fan of getting attention in real life, but the fact that they act fake in front of others is even more annoying. Don't get me wrong, I would prefer being bragged about rather than being yelled at, but don't give me both, pick a side, gosh darn it. 

I also wouldn't treat the oldest child different from the youngest child. I am the oldest child, so I have to say, I'm probably biased. My brother is spoiled as all get out and gets no form of discipline compared to what my parents did to me at his age, and still do to me to this day. I also hate how he can do almost anything he wants to me and get away with it, but if so much as raise my voice at him, I get in deep trouble. I would give my kids equal treatment, good or bad. 

Another thing my parents do, is fail to tell me about something and then yell at me about not doing it. For example, let's say I have to mail a letter tomorrow, but I don't even know about it. They still yell at me and/ or punish me even though it was their fault for not even letting me know about it. 

The last thing I can think of about how I would parent my kids differently is not being a hypocrite, as cox said earlier. Unlike what cox wrote, my parents aren't hypocritical towards me, but in the way they talk about others. They talk about stuff that other people do, and then proceed to do the same things themselves. I mean, it's fine to make mistakes and stuff, but don't talk about others' mistakes when you do the same thing yourselves. 

Sorry for the long rant, but I wanted to get this out of my system. 
My parents are meh, and haven't been that good lately, so I'd have to say there are a lot of things that my parents did that I won't do. 

First of all, I wouldn't brag about my kids to others, and then proceed to yell at them 75% of the time at home when no one else is around to see it. I hate being bragged about, because I'm not a big fan of getting attention in real life, but the fact that they act fake in front of others is even more annoying. Don't get me wrong, I would prefer being bragged about rather than being yelled at, but don't give me both, pick a side, gosh darn it. 

I also wouldn't treat the oldest child different from the youngest child. I am the oldest child, so I have to say, I'm probably biased. My brother is spoiled as all get out and gets no form of discipline compared to what my parents did to me at his age, and still do to me to this day. I also hate how he can do almost anything he wants to me and get away with it, but if so much as raise my voice at him, I get in deep trouble. I would give my kids equal treatment, good or bad. 

Another thing my parents do, is fail to tell me about something and then yell at me about not doing it. For example, let's say I have to mail a letter tomorrow, but I don't even know about it. They still yell at me and/ or punish me even though it was their fault for not even letting me know about it. 

The last thing I can think of about how I would parent my kids differently is not being a hypocrite, as cox said earlier. Unlike what cox wrote, my parents aren't hypocritical towards me, but in the way they talk about others. They talk about stuff that other people do, and then proceed to do the same things themselves. I mean, it's fine to make mistakes and stuff, but don't talk about others' mistakes when you do the same thing yourselves. 

Sorry for the long rant, but I wanted to get this out of my system. 
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06-01-16 09:03 AM
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Well for one. Smoking in front of them. I mean I have no intentions of smoking ever but if I did it would not be around them

Also I would love to be a bit more active in parenting. As a kid I was pretty much allowed to do whatever I wanted. Sure it sounds nice, but sitting around all day playing video games doesn't do much in helping a child. I have very little social skills(in fact talking the idea of being social at all really makes me anxious), nor do I have really any physical strength. So yeah. I'd probably make them be more social/active such as constantly taking them to parks or putting them into certain classes(or sports teams) at a younger age.

But other than that I would follow what my mom did. I'd make sure they were always satisfied.
Well for one. Smoking in front of them. I mean I have no intentions of smoking ever but if I did it would not be around them

Also I would love to be a bit more active in parenting. As a kid I was pretty much allowed to do whatever I wanted. Sure it sounds nice, but sitting around all day playing video games doesn't do much in helping a child. I have very little social skills(in fact talking the idea of being social at all really makes me anxious), nor do I have really any physical strength. So yeah. I'd probably make them be more social/active such as constantly taking them to parks or putting them into certain classes(or sports teams) at a younger age.

But other than that I would follow what my mom did. I'd make sure they were always satisfied.
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06-01-16 04:48 PM
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...well, I'll start off by saying that my grandmother raised me, and she did an excellent job doing it, so I'd definitely follow how she raised me.
...but, if we talk about my mother, who had multiple boyfriends around the time I was born (still no idea who my father is to this day ), couldn't raise me herself since she was a single mom in the navy (understandable), and rarely came to visit (again, understandable when she was in the navy, but now that she's retired, I haven't seen her in over 6 years (not counting skype calls ))...yeah, I'd definitely do things different than her.
I'm not sure if I'll ever have kids of my own someday. I'm not saying that I don't want kids. On the contrary, I'd love to have kids of my own someday. I'm just not sure if I'll ever be ready to have kids, and I don't want to ever be in a situation like my mom and be unable to take care of my kids. So, what I'd do differently than my mom is (if I did decide to have a family of my own) wait until I found the right girl, get married, make sure we were both ready, then plan a family, and raise them like my grandma raised me: with love and kindness, but caution and discipline, and the occasional spoiling.
...well, I'll start off by saying that my grandmother raised me, and she did an excellent job doing it, so I'd definitely follow how she raised me.
...but, if we talk about my mother, who had multiple boyfriends around the time I was born (still no idea who my father is to this day ), couldn't raise me herself since she was a single mom in the navy (understandable), and rarely came to visit (again, understandable when she was in the navy, but now that she's retired, I haven't seen her in over 6 years (not counting skype calls ))...yeah, I'd definitely do things different than her.
I'm not sure if I'll ever have kids of my own someday. I'm not saying that I don't want kids. On the contrary, I'd love to have kids of my own someday. I'm just not sure if I'll ever be ready to have kids, and I don't want to ever be in a situation like my mom and be unable to take care of my kids. So, what I'd do differently than my mom is (if I did decide to have a family of my own) wait until I found the right girl, get married, make sure we were both ready, then plan a family, and raise them like my grandma raised me: with love and kindness, but caution and discipline, and the occasional spoiling.
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