I've recently been trying to be with a girl that I've seen for a little over a year and I'm considering confessing soon, but before I did I wanted to get some perspective and advice from other people so I don't screw anything up too bad. My current plan right now is to wait for a plausible sign that she might like me back, and then wait for the right time to confess and then do it. I've already seen some signs every now and then, but they're too debatable on whether or not it was just me over thinking, so I'm still looking for a sign or something. I feel that doing this will help me read her emotions better so that I will be able to take care of her more. I did like her for the most of last school year, but it was mostly infatuation, and when I started to actually make an effort to know her the beginning of this school year, I began to grow feelings for her. Only about a month ago is when I started to really care about and love her, and now I want to confess and I am mostly ready too, however I am concerned about her feelings and I want to be able to read them slightly first before I try anything. I feel happy and comfortable when I'm around her, and she also has an amazing personality. Oh, and I'm also looking for a long lasting relationship, not a short one just for fun. Don't get me wrong, I'm 15, yes, but I do know what love is. I went through some stuff before that made sure I know what it is, but I can only give my word. Well, what are your guys' opinion on this? When should I confess? Anything else I should know?

My advice would be to just ask her out and tell her how you feel the next time you're alone with her. The fact of the matter is, you'll keep waiting and waiting for that sign or that perfect moment, but it'll never come. It's really hard to know when the right time is, but usually any time (preferably when you're alone with her) is the best time. The sooner the better, I say. Oh, and of course, make sure she's in a good mood first. I hope things work out for you!

She sounds really nice. I assume that you asking her and her refusing you would likely change your relationship forever? Even so, some things are worth the risk; is she?

If you waited to long, and she eventually friendzones you, or like another guy, would you really be happy with that? Wouldn't you rather take the risk now and find out for sure... because I would imagine the risk of loosing a freindship, while bad, would not be like living with the fact that you 'missed your chance'. But that's just me.

My advice is not to wait for the 'perfect opportunity', as they rarely come. It seems like you've thought about it, and it seems like she MIGHT have a similar feelings, what's holding you back from asking her any day now?

Latimew : I know, by right time I mean like when it's appropriate. Thanks for the advice though, I really appreciate it.

Light Knight : It wouldn't really change the relationship too much, and if she's happy with someone else then I would be happy for her since I really care about her. However you're right, I wouldn't like to know that I missed my chance. My friend kept telling me to wait a bit, but I guess you guys are pretty right in the fact that I should take the risk. I really appreciate the help, thanks guys

Here's the deal: Let's not say "confess," let's use the word "profess" when you want to talk about your feelings.  Also, if she talks to you and she smiles at you, she might be interested.

You'll never know exactly how she feels.  Heck, a few months of dating each other you still can't be sure how she feels, so you have a mission.


SITUATION: You like girl and want to go out with her.

OBJECTIVE: Go out with Girl

EXECUTION: Tell her how you feel and see what happens.  In fact, take that part you wrote, " I feel happy and comfortable when I'm around her, and she also has an amazing personality. Oh, and I'm also looking for a long lasting relationship, not a short one just for fun," and just tell her that.  After that, it's in her court.  You can't control her feelings, you can't make her like you, you can only be yourself and see where it goes from there.  You can't read her emotions the same way you can't read Sanskrit.  And if you can read Sanskrit.... well, this is a different discussion.

Your job is to separate yourself from other guys.  Be bold, be assertive, stroll right up to her when it's just the two of you and tell her how you feel.  Practice a few times so you know what you're going to say and you're confident.  A girl isn't impressed with a guy who stumbles over his words often.  Don't do it at school or in front of her friends in case she's embarrassed.  Be snappy, say a few sentences, and let her decide.

"Hi, Pam.  I am happy when I'm around you and I really like you.  You're nice and friendly and you have pretty eyes.  I want you to go out with me.  You don't have to answer now but let me know how you feel.  It's important to me."

Walk away after that.  Immediately.  You're hitting and running because it could go bad real quick and you don't want to force a decision on her.  Make it casual and the last thing you two talk about the rest of the day.  It's that simple.

But simple ain't always easy.

Good luck!

warmaker : You bring up a really good point. I guess you're right, I can't know her emotions fully, even after years of marriage. Not too sure about the hit and run, but you're right in the fact that I don't want to force it on her. I really appreciate the advice, thanks

Be sure to let us know how it worked out!

Light Knight : Yeah, I plan to. Sometime this week maybe, if I end up going to her house or when we end up alone. Once again I really appreciate the help, I feel a lot more confident and less worried

So I confessed to her today and her reaction was really cute. In the end she said yes, and she seems to be really happy but also really confused from all of this. I want to thank all of you again for the advice you all gave me

Good luck reading her emotions. You might think you understand her but you dont. She will throw a curveball at you every once in a while and youll just be standing there thinking... what just happened?

Also, you dont know what love is. Youre 15 and you might think you know, but you dont.


As for advice, just relax and be you. If she likes hanging out with you and talking with you then shes comfortable around you. Are you the one who always initiates conversation, or does she go out of her way to talk to you? Tray and pay attention to that.

bobq : Yeah I know, I'm not gonna try to read her emotions. I also already confessed, but thanks for the advice anyways I guess.

And about the love thing, trust me when I say that I do. I am starting to fall in love with the girl I confessed to, and I also love another girl who is now a close friend of mine. I went through some stuff with that close friend and through it I learned what real love is. I'm not gonna explain that story, and I can only give you my word, but I am certain without any doubt that I know what love is. I can distinguish love from infatuation

shad0wtraverse : what i've always notices is if you wait to long the opertunity will pass if you don't make it now it won't happen and if you do and she refuses its alright you'll feel the clarity of getting your feelings out of the way a clear mind you can focus on other things knowing the answer sure rejection may hurt but dosn't meen you have to stop loving her