I...
I can't do it.
Everything is just way too much.
I have tried to get rid of gym depression, or at least get a little better.
My friends have tried.
My family has tried.
Vizzed is the only place where I have friends.
My friends are against me.
My family is against me.
The few of you here on vizzed really count and help.
If anyone knows how to fight depression, please share.
I need it.

I have never had depression and I cannot empathize or understand where you are coming from.
I can, however, tell you that joy comes from giving your best to others.  Try coaching, teaching, and volunteering your time to better other people's lives.  They will never turn you away and they'll always accept you for who you are and how you're helping them.

I work at a YMCA and the happiest people are the ones who are giving their time and energy to better those around them.  Those folks are never in a bad mood, never seem to have bad things happen to them and are excited about life in general.
Try volunteering.  See who needs help and offer your time.  That may just do it.  At least you'll meet new people who are positive and will support you.

I'm not against you if it counts for anything.

I was really in a slump recently, and it occasionally resurfaces, usually when I'm lazy. Exercise I cannot recommend enough. That, eating well, and making your life about others will all help you get out of your slump. Find a volunteer job, if you can't get a paying one. I have had so much fun working for my local library, and haven't felt the same since the last time I helped them out. I really miss it, and it helped me out a lot. I hope they'll have a job for me soon.

It requires time, and you'll eventually come out of it on your own.

But what you can do right now is set goals, and achieve them. Keep your life in order.

It doesn't help to let the days blend together and let months go by without doing much.

Achievement can give you a confidence boost. Plus, you won't be regretting lost time once your head finally clears.

I have personally dealt with depression for a long time and I have gotten better but at the same time I don't know what the circumstances or causes of Barathemos's depression are so at best I can only give generic advice.

I. Try to improve your body image - Try to get in shape if you are not already and invest in a nice outfit. If you don't feel better about yourself physically then you won't will feel better mentally.

II. If you are having issues getting through your gym workout then try doing a lighter and quicker version of your workout and focus more on eating healthier to make up the difference.
If you don't feel comfortable in a gym then work out at home if you have the luxury of having your own room or a garage with enough space.

III. If you have trouble talking to people then try watching politics and debates of all kinds. Think what you will of politicians and their beliefs but they are masters of speech and communication and you can learn to make your case from their successes and failures.
Learning to speak clearly, confidently and being quick witted will improve your self esteem and thus help you with your depression.

IV. Consider seeing a psychiatrist and maybe he will prescribe medication to help but try to make sure that the medication isn't something so strong that it interferes with your daily life.

These are just a few of the things that I tried to use to help myself and it may work for you but only you know what bothers you and you will have to make slow and subtle changes to your habits and life in order to improve. It will take time and you will fail along the way but keep trying to improve yourself. Good Luck!

I'm sorry to hear that Barathemos.

I haven't been against you if that counts for anything.

All I can say is there are a few different causes for depression.

knowing the cause let's you find the right cure.


People feel depressed because of three things usually

1 they feel unloved

2 they feel worthless (like they can't accomplish anything, ect.)

3 pressing issues, or questions that make them question things. Such as from watching a movie or knowing that your country could come under nuclear strike at any point in time.


My depression for a while came from how useless I felt at working. I sucked, badly. My head was always in the clouds. I never wanted to be a slacker, or below average worker, it just sucked. And it seemed that there was nothing that I could do to change it. Don't get me wrong, I have a great family, and ones that loved me for who I was. I finally gave up, and decided that I was just not made by God as a good worker. I felt like I was a creative thinker, and that I should try to make money that way.

But my grandpa dumped a bucket of cold water on me, and a week later. . .

I suddenly became a good worker.

What made me get there?

I made another effort.

I am now convinced that anyone can become what they want to be if they only choose to do so, and never give up, (of course, I am not saying that you can do the impossible, ie, grow a 10 foot leg using only your thoughts., but I think that you know what I mean.)

. . .


Doing work, and being a good worker makes us feel useful.

But, as warmaker pointed out, helping others for free, makes us feel loved. We have made someone else happy, and we can share in their happiness.


If it's that your family hates you IRL. Then you can only really do two things.

1- try to become a better person- not everyone is going to like you though, of course. But most people have at least decently functional families. I don't know your situation in real life, I don't see anything. And I hope this wasn't offensive, for I really don't know. But the only person that we can change is ourselves, hence, it's a good place to start.

2- If you family isn't going to help you, find others who will. Others who will love and support you. Good friends can go a long ways to filling the gap left by an unloving family. Once again, I don't know your situation, but hey, it's good to have friends. They can really help us quite a bit through the tough times.


So, that's all I really have to say. Oh, and thank God for anime. Those shows are often so true, I think back a lot to anime when it comes to various emotional, or ideological interventions in life.

Barathemos : Look at North Korea and be happy you're not there. No that wasn't a joke or a smart ass comment, when I'm feeling down I just look at people who have it much worse than me and just feel glad I'm not in their shoes. Of course nobody's the same so you may not feel any better from this little exercise, so... Workout intensely, don't go overboard, if you're overweight, simply going on the treadmill for 45 minutes at a comfortable speed after you warm up with some light weights help tremendously, get some good clothing (Shoot for some holster and a smaller jean size). List some goals you want to reach and set a date.

I'm sorry I don't know your situation nor the context of your post so I honestly just did the best I could, I apologize if this was useless to you or off topic.

Best of luck to your situation!

If this were dating advice, people would normally say "be yourself". But this isn't dating advice, this is to make yourself happier... So, be who you want to be. If you want to be known as the person that is really smart and can help anyone with anything, then be that person. If you want to be a different kind of person just match the description. If "you" doesn't make yourself happy then be something that does make you happy.

Barathemos : I have never had depression but that doesn't mean I haven't felt low. I have. 8th grade year, my friends were against me too. They were your classic mean girls. No matter how bad things get or may seem; you CAN'T give up. Eventually things will get better. If your friends don't support you through your hardships then they aren't really your friends. My advicei is to get new friends. I did. Now as a Senior in high school I am no longer friends with those girls. It was the best decision ever. The group split up and the one that initiated the split refuses to even look at me. She also doesn't seem to have lots of friends. I on the other hand have lots of friends because I carried on with band when she didn't. All my friends are or were recently in band or orchestra. It will get better; hold your head up high and if someone is a jerk to you ignore and don't pay them any mind. You'll be better off in life if don't associate with people like that.

I have bipolar disorder and I've been struggling with depression for weeks now. If this is has been going on for long consider getting professional help. My own ways of coping consist of medication and therapy sessions. I also try to avoid being alone at home. What my doctor said and I think it's very good advice is to try and notice what's real and what's not. When I'm depressed I feel like I'm nobody and I can't achieve a single thing in life, but it's important to remember that it's not true. I have trouble coping with my situation as well so I can't say if it's good advice or not. Just remember that every single second in your life counts and every second you're closer to feeling okay again.

I grew up seeing things and hearing things like skitzo sorry if my spelling is wrong but i never knew people couldn't see what i seen i was looked down on for being the one who didn't get the picture but they didn't get the picture i lived with something almost no one understands i don't understand that much either but i had to keep going i then learned about science and quantum mechanics it showed me that i might not be skitzo i might have seen ghosts or created them in the universe who knows but i felt like that's where i was supposed to be but people say its crazy you think to much but they don't understand and never will so i just do what i like to do play games watch anime and learn science cause nobody cared about my feelings so don't expect me to understand you ether i almost lost hope until i realized somebody's out there who's playing  games and watching anime i don't know anyone yet but i can't give up im going to be a scientist with a PHD and then i can help someone else reach there goals i still feel depressed sometimes but i remember that mission i can only complete so look up bro and define this life 

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I have Chronic Depression, but after years of practice, I just hide it. 

The best think I can tell you to do is to get a support group, probably a small one of maybe 4 or 5 people at maximum, including yourself. These have to be people that you can talk to on a moments notice, and that will always be there for you. 

It's what helped me get over an episode that I had a few months back. 

Barathemos :  

Depression is something that everyone goes through at one time or another even if it is for brief periods of time.  I can understand where you’re coming from.  When I was younger I went through a period of time that was very difficult to go through and very hard to cope with.  One thing that I found that helped me get through hard times was my writing.  I became a writer at an early age and I never thought that it would be something that I would want to do as a career.  Now I can’t imagine doing anything else.  I won’t lie to you, writing does have it’s share of challenges and stresses, but it is also very rewarding and it can be therapeutic.

 

Finding a way to be creative like writing, music, film making, or even participating in sports might interest you and can give you an outlet. I do think though that talking to a counselor and/or finding a support group would probably be helpful. 

The problem with depression, is the best way to beat it is to stay active and driven
And it makes you lethargic and unmotivated
II battled depression off and on for years some times back
and people didn't seem to understand
I wasn't sad!
I just didn't want to do anything, I didn't have any drive or desire
And while I wasn't sad...nothing seemed to make me happy either.

The best way to beat it really is to force yourself to get out there
Force yourself to do things, and talk to people

Running, while it's hard to make yourself do it, really helps tremendously if you can make a regular habit of it
due to the release of endorphins, and the mental push to stay active
It's a small thing, but iit's been proven to help, and It certainly helped me far more than I expected it to

I don't know you at all other than a few post I've seen around this site
but still, if you ever wanna talk to someone who has not only studied, but experienced the situation themselves
then feel free to message me
I'm always here for anyone going through rough times
At the very least, please find someone to talk to
It's an insanely rough road to go alone.
 

I'm not social, at all. I'm an introvert, and anti social. I choose to work alone because I work more efficiently, and I don't have much to talk about, because I don't care about when barbie girls have to go to the mall, or about who's dating who. So loneliness is one of my issues, which can be interpreted to be a form of depression.

I usually go for long walks around town or around parks where everyone is having fun. I'm also a musician, so I like to create my favorite playlist, and just listen to that

Depression is something very profound and actually very difficult to challenge. In order to know how to get out of it, one must know why. People think they know why but sometimes they are in denial of the true 'why.' So is it a contradictory statement to say that people who accept that they are depressed yet is in denial at the same time? It is not contradictory because when someone is depressed, they see no light at the end of the tunnel.

To the OP, Barathemos, How often do you tell yourself that you can't? That you can't do this or that or that you shouldn't? That is where the denial lies I think. I have been depressed before and from time to time I will get some depression like right now. Yes I am not feeling all that bad right now because as one of my favorite author, Terry Goodkind, will put it, I am focusing on my problems and not the solutions. If you keep telling yourself that you cannot, then you surely cannot. If you tell yourself that you can hike that mountain over and over again, eventually you will. There will be road bumps a long the way to finding that light at the end of the tunnel and this is how I did it.

I've been depressed many times before for many different reasons but it is all the same, things seem hopeless...Until, of course, I stop thinking about my problems from which my depression stemmed from. In other words if you find yourself depressed from the moment you wake up the you need some lifestyle changes. Before when I was depressed I didn't know how to deal with it. I acted out, not like a kid throwing tantrums but my personality was one that put myself first and that really doesn't work. Yes we are all inherently selfish but adopting a brave persona as a mask and trying to be a leader did not work because I am focused on myself. It doesn't seem to make sense why it wouldn't work right? If you are depressed then shouldn't you be a selfish jerk and just try to make yourself happy? Yes but it is a short term fix. The way I helped myself is let others help me as I helped them. Let others in. Let yourself out. Become apart of others. Your fambam and friends stopped caring? Find others who will. Someone cares. Like me. Like others here. Like that girl/guy on the trolley getting off at your stop who will listen to you. Are you afraid of talking to new people because they may reject you because of who/hat you are? You are already very depressed and people will turn you down many times but someone will listen. Maybe you can start with your pet dog. Maybe you can start with a neighbor and get rejected by both. Man it must be hard if your own dog doesn't like you right? GET A PET HAMSTER THEN. I truly believe the first step is to be more open and becoming more selfless which is the opposite of selfish. And that is why I am typing this right now. Actually, trying to help others is like my therapy to help myself.

Like I said, I am depressed right now but it is fading as I type. Why? Because I learned from my mistake of thinking of problems and not the solutions. If you keep thinking of problems, YOU WILL LINGER ON THEM. I knew from a while back that if I can have solutions readily available then I can make my depression go away. I decided hmm I don't like feeling like this and I will not let my feelings control me because I control my feelings and emotions. There is only one variable most everyone has almost total control of and that is yourself. I know that I love helping people. So I got out of my bed at 10:3X pm, took a shower, smoked, drove 15 minutes to this spot called Tea n' More, ordered a boba
(bubble in some places) tea drink, and then busted out this laptop and started looking for something to post. I enjoy helping people. It makes me happy. So I do it. I am not just typing this out for you because I am not so naive to think that you wouldn't just go all tl;dr eff this and not read this. I am also doing this for myself and if people reads this, that is a bonus. I know I am doing my part and that makes me happy so again, I do it. This shop closes at 12 tonight so what am I going to do in 14 minutes? Go back to my depression? Hell no. I am not working on my problems, I am now on my path of solutions. I will go hike Cowles mtn. Yes at 12:20am, I am gong to go hike a big hill by myself. This is all therapeutic not to mention the health benefits I will get from hiking. At the top of said hike, I will see stars that is usually blanket out by the city lights. It is nothing short of beautiful. Of course a real mountain or the desert is the ideal place for stargazing but that is a bonus at the end of the hike and it is a bonus I don't have to drive to far to get. But wait, TitaniumOxide, that is waay too reckless to go outside like that at night, what are you some kind of creep of the wild? I don't condone too many reckless stupid behaviors and I do not condone "YOLO" or other crap like that. If you lived in San Diego, you may know that this mountain is visited 24 hours a day by a ton of people so I am not afraid nor am I a wierdo. Okay maybe I am a wierdo but this is all stuff that helps me. I start by being selfless and then I become selfish to help myself. Exercising releases endorphin, the feel good hormone. This is a win win situation.

I have 8 minutes left so before I wrap this up, I'd like to offer some solutions besides what I do for myself because not everyone wants to go help people on some forum at night or hike like this.
1. You can start by bringing your dog to the dog park, people there are always happy to conversate with you about each other's dogs. Hell, just being and spending time with your dog is known to be therapeutic.
2. Go jog at the beach if there is one nearby or lake. The shoreline of beaches has a high concentration of O3 aka ozone, it helps ou feel lightheaded and its a good feeling when you are jogging by the beach on a nice day.
3. Read a book you like.
4. Start a new, beneficial hobby. For me, I started to get more active. For others that means to go volunteer at the hospital or homeless shelter. You will find that helping others is a very very rewarding experience and will help take you out of your depression.
5. Antidepressants. I do not put my full support on these drugs because they have some crappy side affects like ruining your sex drive but they do work. They work so well that people stop because they think they got better and get off of them and then go back to being depressed. I recommend antidepressants only when there is no other way.

Well this is all I have time for tonight. Time for my hike. Hope this helps you as much as it helped myself. I'm not even sad anymore just to show you how much of an affect helping others have on myself. There is a light at the end of the tunnel, though dim it may be, you might just need better glasses and you will see it and get there.

As Always,
TitaniumOxide

Edit: I was listening to Journey's Don't Stop Believin' song and if you haven't heard of this song before you need to. Just youtube it. This song really attacks depression not at its core but it does speak loads about hope. Most of the lyrics is metaphors, a lot of it is not literal at least not to me but everything is spoken in a general sense about not giving up hope. The song tackles the fact that people are lonely creatures and will seeks companionship they can relate to. When this doesn't happen, they become lonely. This matter here because a lot of reasons why people are depressed is because they suffer from loneliness, like nobody will ever understand them. I was halfway up the mountain when this song came on and it really made me think that music like this can really benefit people with depression if they so choose to listen to the underlying meanings of the lyrics.

The first way to stop depression is to stop thinking about being depressed. If you have an unsupportive family,  don't interact with them. If you have unsupportive friends, find new ones. Go somewhere new, start over. There is only one way to stop being depressed and that is to decide that you are going to stop. Depression is a state of mind. It is a feeling. You know how you are happy and then get sad. How you are laughing and then get serious. Depression is the same way. Find something to get your mind off of it(like being on Vizzed or something else.) find people who are going through the same thing or similar things that you are. Do something. Why? Because sulking about it doesn't help. At all.