Legend of greenluigi
Zoro’s Mask chapter 9:
Icy Mountains and the
ultimate sheikah tribe returns!
Meanwhile in Vizzed
town… a vizzed member knocks on david’s door. “Enter” said David with a deep
voice. The vizzed member turned out to be Juliet! “David since there’s a smiley
face going to crash like 2 or 3 days are we going to stay or leave vizzed to
escape?” said Juliet. “I don’t know I have to think about it.” Said Davideo7. “Meanwhile
protect the town as usual.” Meanwhile with geeogree and tRIUNE… ?“The stock pot inn what a beautiful place!”
said tRIUNE. “I know we will just have something to drink then we leave ok!? We
are not here to do the laziness we are here FOR BREAK!” geeo takes his gun and
he shoots to the ceiling because he was angry. The one who works in the stock
pot inn is Anju. “I’m sorry sir but guns are not allowed here.” said Anju. “You
heard her geeo so…” tRiune takes his and geeo’s gun and he throws them outside.
“Excuse me mrs. my partner geeogree is stricter than me, he even gets angry
easily.” “Well ok.” said anju. “First of all let us introduce ourselves we are….
THE TWO SUPERIOR DYNAMIC POLICE ADMINS OF DAVIDEO7! GEEOGREE AND tRIUNE!” the
admins said. “Oh so you are the ones who waked us all last night right?” asked
anju. “Yes we are excuse us we said this only to wake up the mayor for an
important mission.” replied tRIUNE. “Anyway I would like to drink hot chocolate
please.” said tRIUNE. “I would take…. Like tRIUNE.” said geeo. “Two hot
chocolates on it!” said anju. 15 minutes later… “There you go the two sweet hot
chocolates!” said anju with a happy voice. “THX!” said tRIUNE. tRIUNE drinks
his hot chocolate and geeogree too. Then geeogree’s Viz watch started to do a
noise “WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! WARNING!” this signal means that geeo
received a call from davideo7. “Where are you right now!? I’ve been waiting for
you guys last night!” said davideo7. “Sorry sir we’re just taking a break at
the stock pot inn problem?” said tRIUNE. David yelled at the admins which he
pushed back tRIUNE to hurt him “GAHH! OF COURSE I HAVE A PROBLEM! YOU DIDN’T
EVEN TAKE MY PERMISSION! I WAS ABLE TO PUSH BECAUSE I’M THE OWNER.” “ow sorry
sir but can we?” asked tRIUNE with a deep voice. “MY ANSWER IS…. Yes you can. But
first TELL ME THE INFORMATIONS THAT YOU GOT OR ELSE I’LL UNLEASH MY SUPER
TEMPER TANTRUM ATTACK!” “Sorry sorry sir here!” geeogree hands over david the
notes that he took last night. “hmm
gna gna gna… Paul the great Ultra Hero gna gna gna… i wish if he could stayed
here gna gna gna…. ONLY THESE!?” said davideo7. “act?vate lock on screen!”
“Lock on screen turned on ACTIVATE!” tRIUNE said. “AHSGAHJ!! YOU FOOL HOW MANY
TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU THAT WE NEVER SAY THIS!?!?” yelled davideo7 and he
throws tRIUNE to the wall. “Sorry sir!” tRIUNE said. A huge screen appears for
david to check about the smiley face how long doesn’t need days to fall. “Zoom
in farther I can’t see anything!” tRIUNE zoomed in and only and eye can be
seen. “AHH TOO MUCH MAGNIFICATION! ZOOM OUT A LITTLE!” tRIUNE zooms out a
little. David sees the smiley face as it slowly descends. David took notes
about it. “Ok we are the third day so we still have tomorrow and after
tomorrow. Deactivate lock on screen.” David said. “Do what he says tRIUNE lock
on screen OFF!” david yells and he throws geeo to the wall which he got hurt. “YOU
FOOL NEVER SAY THIS IT’S ANNOYING!” david said. tRIUNE deactivate lock on
screen. David disappears. “Excuse us mrs but the man that you just saw is the
owner of vizzed town and the leader of every vizzed members including us. We are
2nd in command.” The admins said. “Well its ok anyway finish your
hot chocolates.” said anju. Suddenly a familiar “shadow” steals geeo and tRIUNE’s
hot chocolates and the shadow said while he stole it:”ZOINK!” it’s the ultimate
sheikah tribe! “I know these guys and they are responsible for the smiley face!
There’s only one member of them that I possibly know, the one who is wearing
that blue mask.” said anju. “Hot chocolate my favorite!” said the young man
while he drinks them. Suddenly the blue mask hurts the young man. “WE DON’T
HAVE TIME FOR THIS! THOSE CHUMPS DEFEATED 3 MAVRICKS! THEY CAN’T BEAT MY ELITE
TOP MAVERICK BLIZZARD WOLFANG SO LET’S GO TO THE ICY MOUNTAINS!” said zoro. “DO
WHAT I SAY OR ELSE I’LL BRAIN WASH SOMEONE ELSE?” “Yes sir!” said the young man
even more brainwashed. The ultimate sheikah tribe goes to the icy mountains. “We
have to go now.” said geeo. “Well goodbye then!” said anju. The two admins
rushes to vizzed town and before this, tRIUNE picks up his and geeo’s guns.
Back with the heroes… “The icy mountains we finally made it!” said green. “There’s
no time to lose!” said kimmy. The vizzed heroes climb the icy mountains. Blizzard
wolfang was at the top of the mountain and he said:”those chumps are here
GERUDOS ATTACK!” the gerudos goes to the bottom of the icy mountains to prepare
to fight against green and kimmy. “Now we are crossed against ninja women? If they
want to fight so be it! “Ha ha ha if we burn this ice mask arceus will be dead
forever so step back!” said the gerudos. “Oh no we’re doomed!” said greenluigi.
Suddenly impa steals the ice mask and she said while she stole it:”ZOINK!” “Once
again we are THE ULTIMATE SHEIKAH TRIBE!” “ahh it’s those banzos again!” said
green with an angry voice. “So now we have to deal against those jerks!? THE
ICE MASK IS OUR’S!” said the gerudos. One of the gerudos retrieves the ice mask
from Impa. Impa got angry and the sheikah tribe vs the gerudos vs the heroes
begin… green uses his fire mask. One of the gerudos was about to burn the ice
mask but kimmy grabs it, later the young man with the blue mask punches kimmy
and he grabs it and later one of the gerudos grabs it and she set it to burn…. “NOOOO!”
yelled kimmy. She got furious, she takes the ice mask and she wears it! She turned
into…. ICE KIMMY! Ice kimmy punches the gerudo and the young man and she
launches an ice ball. “woah that’s intense!” said green.”well I’ll help at
least!” super fire green launches a fire ball at the ninja ninjis. Ice kimmy
defeats impa easily and the young man and she was about to finish the gerudos
but blizzard wolfang uses his power slash and hurted kimmy! “M…MASTER!” said
the gerudos. “Thank goodness you’re here!” “I’ll face those chumps alone by
myself so you the gerudos and those stupid ninjas step back!” blizzard wolfang
uses his whirlwind at the gerudos and the ultimate sheikah tribe. “Finally you’re
going to battle us!” said green. “It’s about time instead of running away!”
kimmy:”We will beat you and revive arceus!” “Is that so!? BRING IT ON!” said
wolfang. TO BE CONTINUE…. will green and kimmy will win or fail? don't miss the next chapter of Zoro's Mask! it's about time that the heroes faces blizzard wolfang! btw i had an early idea that the mavericks supposed to be:"Slash Beast, Flame mamooth, Blizzard Wolfang and Jet Peacock but they are replace by:"Slash Beast, Blizzard Wolfang, Bass and Vile. ?it's the first time in this series that i type 1000 and more words ! why? because i have lots of ideas in zoro's mask and i really got inspired by majora's mask's story manga. i really enjoyed. only few chapters so prepare yourself! get ready for chapter 10 soon... how about a small preview about it? the sheikah tribe got flew away by wolfang so zoro says:"don't fail me wolfang! you are my top 1st strongest maverick! because me and you are the only mavericks remaning! if you fail i'll face green! not kimmy because green's legacy is much bigger than kimmy's..."

greenluigi : David beating up Geeo and Triune is always fun to hear about^.^ kidding. alright time to fight Wolffang this will be fun battle aw it seems Zoro thinks Kimmy isn't good enough to fight him that's gotta hurt 

greenluigi : wow nice story i should read the other story parts though can you pm me the other parts anyay story is funny and well done i like it .

Green, this is just the same old thing man, it's one long sentence basically, there is no spacing, no paragraphs, hardly any decent dialog here. You need to work on your spacing a lot, not to mention the whole "capital letter = shout" thing you have going on, it just makes it look bad, I'm not trying to hound you but you've got to improve the quality of it drastically if you want to keep posting in the forum, otherwise I'm going to have to ask (Or if it comes down to it make,) you stop this story, and believe me the last thing I want to do is end someones creative fantasy, but this is getting a little old man.

That being said it's better than your last chapters so don't get too discouraged, just keep at it and you'll get there.