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Sidewinder
09-19-13 02:17 PM
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10-11-13 10:27 AM
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Is it easier to love, or be loved?

 

09-19-13 02:17 PM
Sidewinder is Offline
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Philosophical question for today: Is it easier to love, or to be loved? 

I think that it is easier to love. You have control over your love, and you can choose who to give some to, and even how much (love for a friend vs a love for someone who have a crush on vs love for family, etc.). 
However, to be loved, you earn that love from others. Basically like respect...you don't go out handing people respect without a reason for it, and so that is the same with love. There may be someone who acts like they love you, but in the end, that may as well be false, for they may like you for your money, looks, etc. and not for your true self. Speaking of true self, it is really hard for you to reveal your true self to others sometimes...you may reveal that to someone who you really like, but usually not to a casual friend. So if that's the case, what's giving other people motivation and reason(s) to love you? 

Tell me what you think, I am looking forward to seeing some different viewpoints
Philosophical question for today: Is it easier to love, or to be loved? 

I think that it is easier to love. You have control over your love, and you can choose who to give some to, and even how much (love for a friend vs a love for someone who have a crush on vs love for family, etc.). 
However, to be loved, you earn that love from others. Basically like respect...you don't go out handing people respect without a reason for it, and so that is the same with love. There may be someone who acts like they love you, but in the end, that may as well be false, for they may like you for your money, looks, etc. and not for your true self. Speaking of true self, it is really hard for you to reveal your true self to others sometimes...you may reveal that to someone who you really like, but usually not to a casual friend. So if that's the case, what's giving other people motivation and reason(s) to love you? 

Tell me what you think, I am looking forward to seeing some different viewpoints
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09-19-13 02:25 PM
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I think it is easier to love someone else because you can love them, but for you to be loved requires someone to like you first, and you kind of have to earn that from someone else. You can choose who you love and how much you like them. But you cannot choose who loves you back. That just sort of happens on its own, you can't just command any random person to love you.

I agree with your campirison with respect, you don't just hand it out at will, you earn it and it is the same with love. It is earned, not just given or handed to you. So you really have to earn it first. And to be loved by someone requires them to get to know you and like you, then comes love.

Good question though. By the way did you make the is it better to be liked or respected thread?
I think it is easier to love someone else because you can love them, but for you to be loved requires someone to like you first, and you kind of have to earn that from someone else. You can choose who you love and how much you like them. But you cannot choose who loves you back. That just sort of happens on its own, you can't just command any random person to love you.

I agree with your campirison with respect, you don't just hand it out at will, you earn it and it is the same with love. It is earned, not just given or handed to you. So you really have to earn it first. And to be loved by someone requires them to get to know you and like you, then comes love.

Good question though. By the way did you make the is it better to be liked or respected thread?
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09-19-13 03:59 PM
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I think that in the past, I would have said it was easier to BE loved. I would have thought that being loved requires no action on your own... but to love is to put forth effort. However, life experiences over the past few years have definitely shown me how wrong my perception was. When someone loves you, there's a sense of obligation, debt, or doubt. You wonder what it is that made that person love you, and you wonder if you're still filling those same expectations. Your interactions change with the person because you want to respect that sacred emotion they chose to reserve for -you-, of all people. It's hard to reject someone who gives you something so special because emotions stemming from love are like glass. Therefore, knowing someone loves you causes you to take extreme care in what you say or do.

Of course, all this being said, I'm talking about 'normal' love. Not obsessed psychos or real life stalkers.

It's even harder if you are in a relationship with the person that loves you. You always wonder if you can possibly deserve that love, and what you can do to warrant it. Can you justify their feelings? Can you work hard enough in that relationship to ensure their emotions aren't wasted? In short, to be loved is a tremendous responsibility. Not necessarily a bad one, but it can definitely get stressful.
I think that in the past, I would have said it was easier to BE loved. I would have thought that being loved requires no action on your own... but to love is to put forth effort. However, life experiences over the past few years have definitely shown me how wrong my perception was. When someone loves you, there's a sense of obligation, debt, or doubt. You wonder what it is that made that person love you, and you wonder if you're still filling those same expectations. Your interactions change with the person because you want to respect that sacred emotion they chose to reserve for -you-, of all people. It's hard to reject someone who gives you something so special because emotions stemming from love are like glass. Therefore, knowing someone loves you causes you to take extreme care in what you say or do.

Of course, all this being said, I'm talking about 'normal' love. Not obsessed psychos or real life stalkers.

It's even harder if you are in a relationship with the person that loves you. You always wonder if you can possibly deserve that love, and what you can do to warrant it. Can you justify their feelings? Can you work hard enough in that relationship to ensure their emotions aren't wasted? In short, to be loved is a tremendous responsibility. Not necessarily a bad one, but it can definitely get stressful.
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(edited by Singelli on 09-19-13 04:04 PM)     Post Rating: 1   Liked By: Sidewinder,

10-10-13 02:46 AM
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As strange as it sounds, being loved is much harder than loving someone. At least, I feel that way, since recognizing you are loved requires you to be able to accept that such feelings can be directed at you. Loving someone else is something we strive to give to others, making it more instinctual.
As strange as it sounds, being loved is much harder than loving someone. At least, I feel that way, since recognizing you are loved requires you to be able to accept that such feelings can be directed at you. Loving someone else is something we strive to give to others, making it more instinctual.
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10-10-13 01:24 PM
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I would say it's easier to be loved. Because it requires no real choices on your part. Normally I would say it's easier to love, but I've come to realise that most people's use of love is really just liking, or having a crush on someone.
I would say it's easier to be loved. Because it requires no real choices on your part. Normally I would say it's easier to love, but I've come to realise that most people's use of love is really just liking, or having a crush on someone.
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10-11-13 10:27 AM
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Sidewinder :
I think it is easier 2 be loved.
For the simple reason of not knowing rather the person you love actually loves you back or not. Even if you trust that person you never can tell if that person actually does love you unless you can read minds. So in my opinion it is easier 2 be loved than 2 love.






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Sidewinder :
I think it is easier 2 be loved.
For the simple reason of not knowing rather the person you love actually loves you back or not. Even if you trust that person you never can tell if that person actually does love you unless you can read minds. So in my opinion it is easier 2 be loved than 2 love.






Image upload: 1024x768 totaling 165 KB's.
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