Windshield
I'll figure out what to say to them 

Would you rather be a ruler of a small village or a peasant of a huge city?

I guess I'd be a ruler of a small village. They're usually well respected and well liked in the local community so I'd still be somewhat normal.
I don't want to be a peasant lol

Would you rather fart out loud in a place with a lot of people or belch really loudly in a place with a lot of people. 

Belch. Most people in my part of the city do it and laugh, so might as well. Farting just has a disgusting type of stigma here in general.

Would you rather punch a toddler in a public place and have everyone hate you for it, or be really lonely?

Easiest one ever, I'd much rather be really lonely than to punch a toddler. I would never EVER hit a child, and anyone who would do such a thing should be charged with child abuse.

Would you rather eat 20 slices of bacon or a bunch of shrimp?

gamerforlifeforever2 : I'd rather eat a bunch of shrimp. Nothing I haven't done before. Thanks for making it so positive.

 Sadly, I must bring us back down from the clouds because I have been sitting on this negatively charged turd blurb for a while.

 Would you rather bite your tongue in half [or] break many of your teeth in half biting down hard on a piece of metal* ?

 * Bear in mind, you live with that choice. You don't get to die soon after.

 P3

I would probably go with break my teeth,those can be repaired/replaced a bit easier than a severed tongue.

I guess I can continue the negative train of thought here.

Would you rather die a brave man or woman,or live as a coward?

Oldschool777 : Well, one would have to really define what living as a "coward" is. If you were, for example, being hunted after for being a political enemy, going down in a blaze of glory and hail of gunfire is great and all, but getting out and seeking asylum as a refugee would be the less heroic, but in my opinion, smarter thing to do. However, if your only options are to live in compliance of an oppressor or die for what you believe, I would take death without hesitation, and I'd go down swinging.

Would you rather have lasagna or spaghetti?

Lasagna any day of the week.

Would you rather have a tattoo on your arm or on your leg?

Furret :   To be clear, the only way I'd get a tattoo is if I was captured by slave traders and branded with one in the ancient tradition of marking human property with ink under their skin. Getting a tattoo still carries that connotation by enslaving oneself to the world's influence by accepting the need for one.

 If those slime buckets actually gave me choice, I'd choose arm so that I wouldn't have to bend to scratch it. Tattoos have been found to be very itchy for people with latent skin conditions which it turns out I do.

 I would recommend getting tested at a lab for latent skin conditions, like Dermatographia before making the final decision to get branded due to the influence of the "movement of never-chained-mind-slaves". That is not the only reason people go to parlors to get branded but it is the most common for sheep who think they are thinking freely of the world's influences.

  Would you rather amalgamate all the world's languages into one language to benefit all of the world's ability to communicate in general [or] download all the world's language knowledge into your own brain to give you a leg up on everyone else because you'll know every language and they won't?

 P3

I would rather amalgamate all the world's languages into one. Having all that knowledge seems kind of dangerous. Plus, I rather have wisdom on other matters instead.

Would you rather have chocolate or vanilla flavored ice cream?

Delvarian :

I'd rather have vanilla flavored ice cream, since I prefer vanilla overall.

Would you rather sleep or be awake?

LunarDarkness2 : I would rather be awake, as that is the only way I can do thing

Would you rather vote for Trump or Die tommorow?

I'd rather die tomorrow honestly. Voting for Trump would be a crime against humanity, he's too dangerous not just for this country, but for the world in general.

Would you rather eat jello or drink a smoothie?

gamerforlifeforever2 :

I would choose to drink a smoothie without a doubt. Smoothies are some of the best things in the world. Too bad I barely have them due to money. :/

Would you rather eat peanut butter off of someone's toe or eat peanut butter off of someone's earlobe?

Lexatom : Off of someone's earlobe, toes are very unsanitary.

Would you rather get hit in the leg by a small meteor or get your leg broken by a group of people with baseball bats?

pennylessz : Wow this very uh....extreme....I rather get my leg broken than a meteor cutting off my leg...that way its less painful.

Its been a while since I've posted in this thread.

Would you rather live in a haunted city or live in a haunted house.

Eniitan : I would rather live in a haunted house. I probably wouldn't get much sleep, but if I lived in a haunted city that could be worse and if anyone else lives there, they wouldn't get much sleep either. :/

Would you rather live the same day twice or skip a day of your life?

I'd probably rather skip a day, it would get me where I need to be faster.

Would you rather vote for Trump or Clinton?

zanderlex : Trump, Clinton has fostered such a hatred for her inside me I would probably vote for the entire Mongol Army over her.

Would you rather be chased by a shark underwater or be chased by a shark with legs, while you have no arms?

Well, if we're assuming they're trying to kill me, I'll take legs while not having arms. If it's simply them trying to catch up to me, I'll take the water so I can keep my arms after word.

Would you rather be forced to sit at your computer all day every day, unable to do anything else but spend time on it / the Internet, or never be allowed to use a PC again? This question assumes you could survive, or sustain your basic needs rather, while doing so. (Phones / tablets are excluded from this, but a laptop still counts)