Hey... So recently I've been having some difficulties and tried setting them right, but it would just seem like no matter what I do it always ends in failure. I find myself at a loss. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Thanks for hearing for out.

You know, I think we all get to the point where we dislike ourselves or become dissatisfied with who we are and the choices we make.  The great news is that you're not alone, and that these periods (although frustrating) are very good for you!  They cause self-reflection and the desire to improve.

As I always tell my students: nobody is perfect and knows everything.  If you knew everything, you'd have nothing to learn...nowhere to grow... no reason to set goals!  How sad would life be, if we had nothing to look forward to or work towards?

And guess what?  Most of us end up making awful... I mean, AWFUL... mistakes.  It happens. We're so very, very human and so very, very flawed.  At least you recognize that some things need fixing, even if you're struggling to do so.  I remember when I was a teenager, I often became highly irritated with myself.  I felt like everything I did was wrong, like I could never fix anything or do things right... and it often led to self-loathing.

So be aware.  Don't let your supposed failures bring you down. Don't tear into your being. We're often our own harshest critics, and if we take a moment to step back... we realize that maybe things aren't as big / bad as we are making them out to be.  Emotions are great exaggerators of truth.

I'm not sure what else to say on the matter since you've provided no details, but please feel free to share more privately if you want to discuss things. Sometimes, we need an ear.  I'm cruddy at giving advice, but I'm open and honest.  If you're wrong, I'll tell you you're wrong... but I'll be understanding and non-judgmental.

I hope you only have better days than the ones before.... strive to make that a goal you successfully reach!

Alright mate. I'm not sure what you're going through. And this is coming from my experiences.

You say you always see yourself as a failure. And that happens at times. Self-love is a journey. Maybe your body doesn't look how you want it to. Maybe your talent isn't at it's peak. Or you haven't perfected that one thing you want to. And maybe that's alright. Instead of looking at what you need to fix all the time, look back and see how far you've come instead.

And remember. The master has failed more times than a novice has even tried.

Alright, some basic rules:

-No more zero days. What's a zero day? Easy. A day in which you get nothing done in terms of your goal. 1 push-up. Write 1 line of text. Do anything. because anything is more than zero, and that means progress.

-Be grateful to the three yous. Past you, present you, and future you. If you wanna love someone and have someone love you back, you gotta learn to love yourself, and the 3 you's are the key. Be grateful for past you for the things you've done. And future you is your best friend. Do favors for him. The cycle of doing something for someone else (future you) and thanking someone for the good in your life (past you) is key to building gratitude and productivity. Do not doubt me. Over time you should spread the gratitude to others who help you on your path.

-This one is very easy, FORGIVE YOURSELF MAN. I mean it. Maybe you got all the know-how, money, ability, strength and talent to do whatever is you wanna do. But lets say you still didn't do it. Now you're giving yourself a hard time for not doing what you need to, to be who you want to. Heads up champion, being disappointed in yourself causes you to be less productive. Tried your best to have a nonzero day yesterday and it failed? so what. I forgive you previous self. I forgive you. But today? Today is a nonzero masterpiece to the best of my ability for future self. This one's for you future homes. Forgiveness man, use it. I forgive you. Say it out loud.

And just remember, life happens whether you live it or not. Motivate yourself and strive, or be miserable. It's completely up to you.

Be confident in yourself. I've noticed that it's easier for me to fail if I think I will. But if I think I can do things right, most of the time I'll do even better than I expected. Also, when you're feeling down, think about all the positive attributes you have. Or even better, you can write them down to refer to at any time

What you've said is so open to interpretation, we really can't help you.

What you should consider is what you want to try to do first.  Pick one thing that will have a positive effect on your life.  Decide the first thing you have to do over the next three days to make that thing slightly better.  Go do it.  Decide what the next step is, and so on.

Self-improve is my job and I help people get better emotionally, physically, socially, and so on.  But it depends on the specifics about what you're trying to change and more importantly, why you're trying to change it.  That motivation is going to get you going.  We really can't do or say anything to get you moving.  It has to come from within.

Anyway, send a PM if you want to talk off-line.  Or just talk about what you're trying to do on here and we'll help figure it out with you.

Local mods: Sorry to interrupt you, but could you please stop by later on and close this thread and the other one about me officially being back, too?