my story is about 8 boys named Adam Baker,Adam 2,Enzo Matrix,Party Boy,Perfect,Sensitive,Winston and Zexyzec and they went to Adam Club House to have a party and play videogame and drink can of pop. They was having fun dancing and playing videogame. Winston sure did having fun and so did Party Boy. The next day everyone went swimming in their Swimming pool. They had good times. They went camping in Adam Baker Club House and they had pizza,bread sticks and drinking Drink can of pop. They are playing videogame and they all stay up all night watching movies and reboot and telling Reboot stories and ghost stories. They got up and play some more videogames. everyone were dancing again. Winston was having fun dancing and Party Boy was like this is party up. Everyone was having so much fun in their lifes. They go to the zoo to see all the animals and Winston was making crazy faces at the animals and everyone was like saying Go Winston Go. They went back to Adam Baker Club and they sit around talking and drinking can of pop and eating some food. They really enjoy hanging out with each other. Everyone were happy that they were like brothers to each other.

The End


this story by
Party Boy

Enzo Matrix : Dude you have to stop doing this it's spam and against the rules it can get you banned so if you don't want that then stop. I mean really in chat you keep complaining how you are going to quit vizzed or stop posting forever and it's starting to get on our nerves. This is all i'm saying cause I don't want to start a war.

play4fun :

Too many spelling errerrszzzzz.....


Needs more Mountain Dew and Doritos.


I downvote this on reddit :V

paper luigi : well I crashed the party brought weed        plus enzo not to lie if you don't want to get banned again then please don't make these threads or make it not look like spam

Signed Here    Henry Out

Ok, at this point there's no way you aren't messing with us... right? o_e

Enzo Matrix : I thought you said you were done with Splitting Adam. Anyhow, you didn't need to say "Enzo Matrix,Zexyzec Adam Baker,Adam 2,Party Boy,Perfect,Sensitive & Winston." You could have just said "they" or "everyone" or "the Adams" or something.


Mecha Leo : That's provocative and rude. I know I'm not a mod here, but please edit your post.

He's never going to improve if we keep talking to him the way we are. Perhaps we should give him some tips? Like telling him he should be less repetitive and use "they" instead of mentioning everyone (like Faded said), or maybe reminding him to put spaces after comas? I'm sure he would appreciate all these little things very much. 

I didn't find this complete "spam". He simply tried to write a story, and I liked it. 

Why don't we help him? Do you seriously think he's going to get any better if we label EVERYTHING he types as spam? I found this one of his best threads. I didn't say it was good; I said it was one of HIS best, and I think he should know that.

Enzo, this was a cool story. I liked it. There. I let you know.

If some of you saw improvement, then why didn't you tell him?

I took an Arabic exam today, and I am really bad at the language. If the paragraph I wrote in there were translated, I bet it would sound exactly like this. Is my teacher going to tell me that it sucks? NO. She's going to point out my errors and tell me how I can do better.

I know some of you are thinking "he's been given advice COUNTLESS of times." Well, you know what, everyone? You may say people have given him advice COUNTLESS of times, but guess what? He's listened "countless" of times. Some people need to be told more than once. I'm certainly one of them.

All I'm saying is that there's no point telling him "there's so many mistakes" if you're not going to point out what they are. I'm pretty sure he KNOWS there are mistakes, guys. I'm pretty sure he knows, doesn't let it bother him, and posts it anyway, hoping he did well.

How does he know exactly how good or bad he's done? The feedback! I don't know about you people, but I definitely don't see an improvement in Enzo Matrix if all the people who are supposed to be teaching say is "this is spam." I swear he gets that by now.

Enzo, your story reminded me of lots my younger self wrote. I was an aspiring kid, and my friends and family found the stories cute. I found this cute; I'm glad all the characters had a blast! 

Here's an example of something you could work on, though:

"Winston was making crazy faces at the animals and everyone was like saying Go Winston Go."

Ha, ha, that made me laugh! I'm rooting for Winston, too ! *High fives!* Anyway, seriously, though, that was a nearly perfect sentence, but you have to choose between "like" and "saying". Did you mean "everyone was like" or "everyone was saying?" Make sure to put a coma before the "and". Also, neither of the words "Go" needed to be capitalized . Almost done. When you say that someone or a group of people are saying something, you have to put it between quotation marks. Quotations are these things: ". Finally, you have to put two comas that separate "Winston" from both of the "go"s. Maybe an exclamation point would fit better since they're all cheering ? Here is your new sentence!

Winston was making crazy faces at the animals, and everyone was saying "go, Winston, go!"

OR

Winston was making crazy faces at the animals, and everyone was like "go, Winston, go!"

There!

I hope you continue writing, Enzo; I have a feeling you have the potential to think up really cool plots! 

And that's all there is to it, people. He just needs to be reminded and given some pointers. We need to put him on the right track. He's obviously trying to do it himself, but we need to help him. He's still putting out these threads for us to see how we react and whether he's gotten any better or not.

Why are we giving up on him when he isn't giving up on us?

I know I've been silent about this for a while but, my God. I needed to let that out. Why did I "Like" this post? Because I actually liked it. That's it. That's all. There's nothing more to it. I saw effort, I saw progress, and I liked it. His age is disputed, but why does it matter? Whether he's a kid or grownup (I personally don't believe he's lying about his age, but whatever), isn't it obvious that he's someone who's at least trying and looking for help? He needs it anyway, so why can't we just give it to him consistently without saying he's asking for "too much" every now and then so he breaks down again, and just leave his debated age out of this? Why does anyone care? He needs advice! So either give it to him or stop pointing out the obvious! I'm sure it annoys him very much!

Good luck, Enzo! I really liked this cute, little story, and I really hope you stop encountering more people who do nothing but lead you either nowhere or backwards.

NintendoFanKimmy : that was a good Speech & i like it & thanks for backing me up

Enzo Matrix : No problem! Just keep giving it your best try; it's okay if it doesn't turn out perfect in the end. The important thing is that you're putting an effort and doing your best!

NintendoFanKimmy : I agree Kimmy, how can one improve without advice?

Enzo, nice story bro! I think that what Faded and Kimmy said most of the advice that I wanted to say at first. So all I will say is that I think that if you keep making stories you really can improve and make even longer and more complex stories! Keep up the good work!
P.S. I don't know what is the thing with people being pissed at you but being pissed about a story that is not made to offend somebody is kinda weird in my opinion. Just make stories if you like them

Enzo Matrix : wow I love your Splitting Adam story

zexyzec : Yo can stop replying to him. He's banned so he won't be able to see it. (I think.) If he can, then he won't be able to reply back, so there's really no need to reply.