Remove Ad, Sign Up
Register to Remove Ad
Register to Remove Ad
Remove Ad, Sign Up
Register to Remove Ad
Register to Remove Ad
Signup for Free!
-More Features-
-Far Less Ads-
About   Users   Help
Users & Guests Online
On Page: 1
Directory: 195
Entire Site: 4 & 1159
Page Staff: pokemon x, pennylessz, Barathemos, tgags123, alexanyways, supercool22, RavusRat,
04-25-24 10:57 AM

Thread Information

Views
1,191
Replies
14
Rating
3
Status
CLOSED
Thread
Creator
Mr. Zed
09-08-13 02:22 PM
Last
Post
Dragonlord Step..
10-21-13 12:08 AM
Additional Thread Details
Views: 306
Today: 0
Users: 1 unique

Thread Actions

Thread Closed
New Thread
New Poll
Order
 

Chapter 4 of Zed's story :D

 

09-08-13 02:22 PM
Mr. Zed is Offline
| ID: 881819 | 530 Words

Mr. Zed
Level: 81


POSTS: 550/1811
POST EXP: 124151
LVL EXP: 4844124
CP: 2708.7
VIZ: 182711

Likes: 0  Dislikes: 0
Chapter 4 of Zed's story. Now for all those who have just seen this and have not seen the other chapters then you should visit the thread called " Keeping up with the chapters " .  Right then. In this chapter a new character will be introduced . This character will only appear once throughout the book . Enjoy



Captain Micheal - " How are we doing on the search for the gold ? " Crew member - " Pretty good sir. . But we seem to be entering a fog " .  The sudden sound of thunder and lightening come crashing down upon the ears of the crew . Listen to this while you read the first paragraph :  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uVAy2uOpA0E . The theme of death starts to play . A black spot appears in the middle of the sea in front of the ship . From the Black spot first arises a skull followed by a pole followed by a ship . The Reaper's Bride. And its captain , Mr. Dedmond . A flash of lightening appears and in the blink of and eye Dedmond seems to teleport from his ship to the other. Dedmond - " What are you doing in my waters ? " Captain - " These aren't your waters . The sea belongs to no one . You have no right to ask such  a question ."  Dedmond - " Lets say maybe I don't have a right to ask such a question. Do you have a right to live ? " Captain - " Um... What kind of question is that ?" Dedmond stares into the eyes of the captain causing the captain's eyes to glaze over and his past sins to be revealed to him and Dedmond. Dedmond - " You have commited many sins and crimes but yet you are still alive. You have no right to live . " Dedmond withdraws his blade from its holder . Dedmond - " Look on the sword and tell me what do you see ? " To his surprise the captain saw his reflection , only he was without flesh and was but a skeleton . Captain - " Wh wh what are you ?" Dedmond - " I am  ....... Death . " Dedmond trusts his sword through the chest of the captain , nearest his heart , killing him and imprisoning his soul within the blade of his sword . All of Dedmond's crew swing over from ropes onto the ship . Dedmond - " Kill them. Kill them alll !!! " . The entire crew starts running in terrowras some were being stabbed , sliced , and even beheaded . Those that tried to jump ship were swallowed whole by sharks before they even hit the sea . Within a matter of seconds , all the crew were reduced to lifeless corpses . With a flash of lightening Dedmond teleported back to his ship . Dedmond - "  Sink it. Let no man survive . HAHAHAHAHA !!!!! "




That was the first part of chapter 4 . Tell me what you think
Chapter 4 of Zed's story. Now for all those who have just seen this and have not seen the other chapters then you should visit the thread called " Keeping up with the chapters " .  Right then. In this chapter a new character will be introduced . This character will only appear once throughout the book . Enjoy



Captain Micheal - " How are we doing on the search for the gold ? " Crew member - " Pretty good sir. . But we seem to be entering a fog " .  The sudden sound of thunder and lightening come crashing down upon the ears of the crew . Listen to this while you read the first paragraph :  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uVAy2uOpA0E . The theme of death starts to play . A black spot appears in the middle of the sea in front of the ship . From the Black spot first arises a skull followed by a pole followed by a ship . The Reaper's Bride. And its captain , Mr. Dedmond . A flash of lightening appears and in the blink of and eye Dedmond seems to teleport from his ship to the other. Dedmond - " What are you doing in my waters ? " Captain - " These aren't your waters . The sea belongs to no one . You have no right to ask such  a question ."  Dedmond - " Lets say maybe I don't have a right to ask such a question. Do you have a right to live ? " Captain - " Um... What kind of question is that ?" Dedmond stares into the eyes of the captain causing the captain's eyes to glaze over and his past sins to be revealed to him and Dedmond. Dedmond - " You have commited many sins and crimes but yet you are still alive. You have no right to live . " Dedmond withdraws his blade from its holder . Dedmond - " Look on the sword and tell me what do you see ? " To his surprise the captain saw his reflection , only he was without flesh and was but a skeleton . Captain - " Wh wh what are you ?" Dedmond - " I am  ....... Death . " Dedmond trusts his sword through the chest of the captain , nearest his heart , killing him and imprisoning his soul within the blade of his sword . All of Dedmond's crew swing over from ropes onto the ship . Dedmond - " Kill them. Kill them alll !!! " . The entire crew starts running in terrowras some were being stabbed , sliced , and even beheaded . Those that tried to jump ship were swallowed whole by sharks before they even hit the sea . Within a matter of seconds , all the crew were reduced to lifeless corpses . With a flash of lightening Dedmond teleported back to his ship . Dedmond - "  Sink it. Let no man survive . HAHAHAHAHA !!!!! "




That was the first part of chapter 4 . Tell me what you think
Trusted Member
Not Important


Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'

Registered: 07-01-13
Location: Lost .
Last Post: 2979 days
Last Active: 1314 days

09-08-13 02:43 PM
goodboy is Offline
| ID: 881836 | 36 Words

goodboy
¯_(?)_/¯
Level: 86


POSTS: 963/2102
POST EXP: 124962
LVL EXP: 6084065
CP: 2829.4
VIZ: 123816

Likes: 0  Dislikes: 0
Holy cow, this was long like the others. I just finished reading it, and it's as creative as the others! I like the new character, no matter how brief he was.

Good job! Keep 'em coming!
Holy cow, this was long like the others. I just finished reading it, and it's as creative as the others! I like the new character, no matter how brief he was.

Good job! Keep 'em coming!
Trusted Member

Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'

Registered: 05-27-13
Location: Your backyard.
Last Post: 2615 days
Last Active: 2536 days

09-08-13 02:44 PM
nzip is Offline
| ID: 881837 | 19 Words

nzip
Level: 31


POSTS: 168/200
POST EXP: 5537
LVL EXP: 177799
CP: 265.0
VIZ: 7693

Likes: 0  Dislikes: 0
good but needs to be longer not to mich but bout 10 more lines keep up the writin zed
good but needs to be longer not to mich but bout 10 more lines keep up the writin zed
Member
an eye for art


Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'

Registered: 06-30-13
Location: The thrid rock from the sun
Last Post: 3591 days
Last Active: 3307 days

09-08-13 02:48 PM
Mr. Zed is Offline
| ID: 881844 | 39 Words

Mr. Zed
Level: 81


POSTS: 552/1811
POST EXP: 124151
LVL EXP: 4844124
CP: 2708.7
VIZ: 182711

Likes: 0  Dislikes: 0
nzip : Thank you . I would make it longer but I do not want to bundle it up like the others.


goodboy : Thanks to you too. I will start writing the second part of it now

 
nzip : Thank you . I would make it longer but I do not want to bundle it up like the others.


goodboy : Thanks to you too. I will start writing the second part of it now

 
Trusted Member
Not Important


Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'

Registered: 07-01-13
Location: Lost .
Last Post: 2979 days
Last Active: 1314 days

09-08-13 02:54 PM
angel11222 is Offline
| ID: 881853 | 28 Words

angel11222
Level: 22


POSTS: 57/92
POST EXP: 3034
LVL EXP: 55148
CP: 73.9
VIZ: 13494

Likes: 0  Dislikes: 0
that was long wow but i like it keep going  cant wait for 5 to come out ..i need to read 1 first i think lol XD
that was long wow but i like it keep going  cant wait for 5 to come out ..i need to read 1 first i think lol XD
Member

Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'

Registered: 08-15-13
Last Post: 3859 days
Last Active: 3850 days

09-08-13 02:56 PM
Sidewinder is Offline
| ID: 881854 | 16 Words

Sidewinder
Level: 65


POSTS: 213/1093
POST EXP: 110877
LVL EXP: 2259795
CP: 4575.8
VIZ: 50810

Likes: 0  Dislikes: 0
Fantastic. This story is going to be really great, I can tell. Nice job Mr. Zed!
Fantastic. This story is going to be really great, I can tell. Nice job Mr. Zed!
Trusted Member


Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'

Registered: 08-10-13
Location: United States
Last Post: 3726 days
Last Active: 3648 days

09-08-13 10:05 PM
Mr. Zed is Offline
| ID: 882202 | 837 Words

Mr. Zed
Level: 81


POSTS: 553/1811
POST EXP: 124151
LVL EXP: 4844124
CP: 2708.7
VIZ: 182711

Likes: 0  Dislikes: 0
This is chapter 4 part 2 . I hope you enjoy




Zed - " Captain's Log .  December 10th 1956 . Sunday. I have currently gotten my map and my weaponry . All that is left now is the journey to the Bog of the Beast " Amy - " Zeeeedddy . Get back to bed. I was not done yet " Zed - " Coming Amy . " Zed and Amy are interrupted by a knock at the door . Zed - " Whats so urgent that you had interrupt my   " captain's time " ? " Matthew - " There is a black spot in front of us and we don't know what it is . " Zed - " Black spot you say ? Let me have a look see . * Picks up telescope and looks at the sea searching for black spot  * I see no black spo ........ Oh bakka . Alright listen up !!! Batten down the hatches  , All hands on deck raise the sail. I want this ship to turn around . Now !!!! " Amy - " Zed . Whats wrong ? " Zed - " You know those stories hear of the Grim Reaper ?  Well he is coming. And I do not think its to say hi .(Listen to this unlit I say to stop ) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uVAy2uOpA0E .Now a storm looked like it was rolling in and the entire ship became covered by fog. From the black spot first arose a skull .  Underneath the skull was a pole and underneath the pole was a ship. The ship was kissed with the curse of death and decay .  It looked 50% bones and was named The Reaper's Bride. The captain of the ship was none other than Captain Dedmond. ( You can stop listening to the theme now ) A flash of lightening uccured and Dedmond was teleported to Zed's ship . Zed - " Wel if it isn't my favourite dead pirate walking . " Dedmond - You are tresspassing on my waters . " Zed - Ohh no. We were just passing by . We heard that it had wonderful weather and decided to give it a try . Didn't know that these were your waters Mr. Dedmond . "   Dedmond - " You know why they call it The Dead Sea ? " Zed - " No . And frankly I don't want to know . "   Dedmond - " Legend has it that when the first sailors sailed in that sea they were tresspassing on chartered waters. The sea belonged to a Shark like creature with 10 000 teeth and 10x more hatred for tresspassers. So he did what I would do and killed them. He killed them all . Any other sailor who dare set ship in those waters were never seen or heard from again. The only things that came back were their dead , lifeless bodies !!! .    Zed - " Nice story but what does it have to do with me ?"  Dedmond - This ship . Its The Unlucky Charm . " Zed - " Yes how did you know ? "  Dedmond - " I was here when the last captain's head was decapitated  .  You are tresspassing on my waters. * Pulls out blade showing Zed his skeleton reflection * ." Dedmond's crew swung over from ropes onto Zed's ship . Dedmond - " Kill them . KILL THEM ALL !!!! . Just when they were about to start taking lives and claiming souls Zed interupts. Zed - " WAIT !!! What if .... what if I could give you something... something in return for our not dying ? " Dedmond - " The only thing I want from you is your soul in my sword !!! . "  Zed - " Fascinating . But I have something better, I can get you a map to the Lost city of Atlantis. " Demond - " You're bluffing. " Zed - " Nope . Not bluffing. I am really not bluffing. " Dedmond - " How would you get this map ? " Zed - " Ohh thats easy. I have a map .  " Dedmond - " You have a map to the map of The Lost city Of Atlantis ? " Zed - " Yes. I do have a map to the map of the Lost city Of Atlantis "  Dedmond - " Fine. I'll spear you and your crew and ship. But if you don't get me this map I will have your Soul !!!! . Zed - Wouldn't have it any other way Mr. Dedmond " Amy - " Um.. Zed . Where did you get that map ?"   Zed  - " I am a pirate. I stole it of course " . 



That was the end of chapter 4 . Chapter 5 is coming soon
This is chapter 4 part 2 . I hope you enjoy




Zed - " Captain's Log .  December 10th 1956 . Sunday. I have currently gotten my map and my weaponry . All that is left now is the journey to the Bog of the Beast " Amy - " Zeeeedddy . Get back to bed. I was not done yet " Zed - " Coming Amy . " Zed and Amy are interrupted by a knock at the door . Zed - " Whats so urgent that you had interrupt my   " captain's time " ? " Matthew - " There is a black spot in front of us and we don't know what it is . " Zed - " Black spot you say ? Let me have a look see . * Picks up telescope and looks at the sea searching for black spot  * I see no black spo ........ Oh bakka . Alright listen up !!! Batten down the hatches  , All hands on deck raise the sail. I want this ship to turn around . Now !!!! " Amy - " Zed . Whats wrong ? " Zed - " You know those stories hear of the Grim Reaper ?  Well he is coming. And I do not think its to say hi .(Listen to this unlit I say to stop ) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uVAy2uOpA0E .Now a storm looked like it was rolling in and the entire ship became covered by fog. From the black spot first arose a skull .  Underneath the skull was a pole and underneath the pole was a ship. The ship was kissed with the curse of death and decay .  It looked 50% bones and was named The Reaper's Bride. The captain of the ship was none other than Captain Dedmond. ( You can stop listening to the theme now ) A flash of lightening uccured and Dedmond was teleported to Zed's ship . Zed - " Wel if it isn't my favourite dead pirate walking . " Dedmond - You are tresspassing on my waters . " Zed - Ohh no. We were just passing by . We heard that it had wonderful weather and decided to give it a try . Didn't know that these were your waters Mr. Dedmond . "   Dedmond - " You know why they call it The Dead Sea ? " Zed - " No . And frankly I don't want to know . "   Dedmond - " Legend has it that when the first sailors sailed in that sea they were tresspassing on chartered waters. The sea belonged to a Shark like creature with 10 000 teeth and 10x more hatred for tresspassers. So he did what I would do and killed them. He killed them all . Any other sailor who dare set ship in those waters were never seen or heard from again. The only things that came back were their dead , lifeless bodies !!! .    Zed - " Nice story but what does it have to do with me ?"  Dedmond - This ship . Its The Unlucky Charm . " Zed - " Yes how did you know ? "  Dedmond - " I was here when the last captain's head was decapitated  .  You are tresspassing on my waters. * Pulls out blade showing Zed his skeleton reflection * ." Dedmond's crew swung over from ropes onto Zed's ship . Dedmond - " Kill them . KILL THEM ALL !!!! . Just when they were about to start taking lives and claiming souls Zed interupts. Zed - " WAIT !!! What if .... what if I could give you something... something in return for our not dying ? " Dedmond - " The only thing I want from you is your soul in my sword !!! . "  Zed - " Fascinating . But I have something better, I can get you a map to the Lost city of Atlantis. " Demond - " You're bluffing. " Zed - " Nope . Not bluffing. I am really not bluffing. " Dedmond - " How would you get this map ? " Zed - " Ohh thats easy. I have a map .  " Dedmond - " You have a map to the map of The Lost city Of Atlantis ? " Zed - " Yes. I do have a map to the map of the Lost city Of Atlantis "  Dedmond - " Fine. I'll spear you and your crew and ship. But if you don't get me this map I will have your Soul !!!! . Zed - Wouldn't have it any other way Mr. Dedmond " Amy - " Um.. Zed . Where did you get that map ?"   Zed  - " I am a pirate. I stole it of course " . 



That was the end of chapter 4 . Chapter 5 is coming soon
Trusted Member
Not Important


Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'

Registered: 07-01-13
Location: Lost .
Last Post: 2979 days
Last Active: 1314 days

09-08-13 11:47 PM
Kid Danger is Offline
| ID: 882276 | 5 Words

Kid Danger
Enzo Matrix
Level: 42


POSTS: 35/399
POST EXP: 26416
LVL EXP: 497501
CP: 2688.4
VIZ: 115703

Likes: 0  Dislikes: 0
Mr. Zed It Was Good
Mr. Zed It Was Good
Vizzed Elite
Super Local
https://www.vizzed.com/boards/images/ranks/paragoomba.gif


Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'

Registered: 08-24-13
Location: Swellview
Last Post: 462 days
Last Active: 51 days

09-08-13 11:49 PM
Mr. Zed is Offline
| ID: 882278 | 29 Words

Mr. Zed
Level: 81


POSTS: 555/1811
POST EXP: 124151
LVL EXP: 4844124
CP: 2708.7
VIZ: 182711

Likes: 0  Dislikes: 0
Enzo Matrix : Thank you . I try to make it good. Maybe even gooder. Or better. Or the best . Yeah I am going to with the best
Enzo Matrix : Thank you . I try to make it good. Maybe even gooder. Or better. Or the best . Yeah I am going to with the best
Trusted Member
Not Important


Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'

Registered: 07-01-13
Location: Lost .
Last Post: 2979 days
Last Active: 1314 days

09-09-13 12:09 AM
Eirinn is Offline
| ID: 882294 | 42 Words

Eirinn
Level: 154


POSTS: 2133/7900
POST EXP: 1300417
LVL EXP: 46037657
CP: 69368.0
VIZ: 1836533

Likes: 0  Dislikes: 0
Not bad. I'll have to start following these to see where we end up now. Thanks for tipping me off to a story to follow. As for the forum selection, these should actually be in the Story forum. Just for future reference.
Not bad. I'll have to start following these to see where we end up now. Thanks for tipping me off to a story to follow. As for the forum selection, these should actually be in the Story forum. Just for future reference.
Vizzed Elite
Eirinn


Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'

Registered: 07-18-12
Last Post: 2059 days
Last Active: 2059 days

09-09-13 05:55 AM
Barathemos is Offline
| ID: 882338 | 17 Words

Barathemos
Level: 205


POSTS: 4827/15635
POST EXP: 668938
LVL EXP: 124944822
CP: 46550.1
VIZ: 892425

Likes: 1  Dislikes: 0
Mr. Zed : Wow, that was long.  There seems to be death me laddie'. Nice job with these!
Mr. Zed : Wow, that was long.  There seems to be death me laddie'. Nice job with these!
Site Staff
Minecraft Admin

Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'

Registered: 02-17-13
Location: Atlanta, Georgia
Last Post: 25 days
Last Active: 8 days

Post Rating: 1   Liked By: Mr. Zed,

09-09-13 03:06 PM
B619ook is Offline
| ID: 882459 | 38 Words

B619ook
Level: 89


POSTS: 1068/2231
POST EXP: 80910
LVL EXP: 6651832
CP: 2964.8
VIZ: 59605

Likes: 1  Dislikes: 0
A little short but really interesting. I see you made another great story! I got to say that was a pretty great cliffhanger you made. Anyway I hope to see what's going to happen next in your stories! 
A little short but really interesting. I see you made another great story! I got to say that was a pretty great cliffhanger you made. Anyway I hope to see what's going to happen next in your stories! 
Trusted Member

Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'

Registered: 05-28-13
Location: Earth
Last Post: 283 days
Last Active: 115 days

Post Rating: 1   Liked By: Mr. Zed,

10-20-13 09:39 PM
Dragonlord Stephi is Offline
| ID: 911397 | 77 Words

Level: 51


POSTS: 250/605
POST EXP: 234371
LVL EXP: 995181
CP: 3270.6
VIZ: 216879

Likes: 1  Dislikes: 0
It's good! I would recommend starting new paragraphs when speakers switch, and using traditional tags, simply to make it simpler to follow when reading.

On that note... the banter was fun to 'watch.' "Why do you sail on my seas?"
"They're not your seas, you can't ask that! You have no right!"
"Do you have a right to live?"
"WHAT KINDA QUESTION IS THAT??!!" 

Okay, it didn't go exactly like that, but you know. Loved it.
It's good! I would recommend starting new paragraphs when speakers switch, and using traditional tags, simply to make it simpler to follow when reading.

On that note... the banter was fun to 'watch.' "Why do you sail on my seas?"
"They're not your seas, you can't ask that! You have no right!"
"Do you have a right to live?"
"WHAT KINDA QUESTION IS THAT??!!" 

Okay, it didn't go exactly like that, but you know. Loved it.
Vizzed Elite
Giving Ged and Eragon a Run For Their Money Since 1998


Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'

Registered: 01-27-12
Location: Baltimore, MD
Last Post: 2253 days
Last Active: 461 days

Post Rating: 1   Liked By: Mr. Zed,

10-20-13 11:54 PM
Mr. Zed is Offline
| ID: 911473 | 127 Words

Mr. Zed
Level: 81


POSTS: 806/1811
POST EXP: 124151
LVL EXP: 4844124
CP: 2708.7
VIZ: 182711

Likes: 0  Dislikes: 0
Dragonlord Stephi : Thank ye kindly fair lass . But hwat happened to the layout you had . I loved it so . And Dedmond is one of those guys who has a personality that can be deep , dark , and depressing ...... or comedic in a cruel and demented sort of way . Like when he replaced the skull on the top of his sail with a freshly decapitated head and said " Nice fit " . Or when he killed some guys and said " I love Mondays " .  And as for the paragraphing ...... well lets just say t gets better in book 2 . When I separate the Dialogues from the actual story so it looks neater and easier to read  
Dragonlord Stephi : Thank ye kindly fair lass . But hwat happened to the layout you had . I loved it so . And Dedmond is one of those guys who has a personality that can be deep , dark , and depressing ...... or comedic in a cruel and demented sort of way . Like when he replaced the skull on the top of his sail with a freshly decapitated head and said " Nice fit " . Or when he killed some guys and said " I love Mondays " .  And as for the paragraphing ...... well lets just say t gets better in book 2 . When I separate the Dialogues from the actual story so it looks neater and easier to read  
Trusted Member
Not Important


Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'

Registered: 07-01-13
Location: Lost .
Last Post: 2979 days
Last Active: 1314 days

10-21-13 12:08 AM
Dragonlord Stephi is Offline
| ID: 911483 | 31 Words

Level: 51


POSTS: 251/605
POST EXP: 234371
LVL EXP: 995181
CP: 3270.6
VIZ: 216879

Likes: 0  Dislikes: 0
Mr. Zed All right then, that's good. 

As for my layout... I'm not sure if it was the reason for glitching my posts, but I'm not using it for a while.
Mr. Zed All right then, that's good. 

As for my layout... I'm not sure if it was the reason for glitching my posts, but I'm not using it for a while.
Vizzed Elite
Giving Ged and Eragon a Run For Their Money Since 1998


Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'

Registered: 01-27-12
Location: Baltimore, MD
Last Post: 2253 days
Last Active: 461 days

Links

Page Comments


This page has no comments

Adblocker detected!

Vizzed.com is very expensive to keep alive! The Ads pay for the servers.

Vizzed has 3 TB worth of games and 1 TB worth of music.  This site is free to use but the ads barely pay for the monthly server fees.  If too many more people use ad block, the site cannot survive.

We prioritize the community over the site profits.  This is why we avoid using annoying (but high paying) ads like most other sites which include popups, obnoxious sounds and animations, malware, and other forms of intrusiveness.  We'll do our part to never resort to these types of ads, please do your part by helping support this site by adding Vizzed.com to your ad blocking whitelist.

×