So I decided to be brave and post a few of my old poems.  Feedback?

In the Stranger’s Land
Our troops march courageously to a land they don’t know, 
And they march to fight against a terrible foe. 
They willingly put their lives on the line, 
So that, in freedom, others may be able to shine. 

So I salute to them; I give them my heart, 
‘Cause without them, many would be lost in the dark. 

They go to war, leaving behind family and friend,  
So that this horrid dictatorship might sometime end, 
And so that others may have the chance, 
To sing freely and to happily dance. 

So I salute to them; I give them my heart, 
‘Cause without them, many would be lost in the dark. 

Many lose their lives, causing hearts to ache, 
But we know they did it for a stranger’s sake. 
They push fear aside and willingly go, 
Dealing with grave injuries and with woe. 

So I salute to them; I give them my heart, 
‘Cause without them, many would be lost in the dark. 

They go low on food for many a day, 
With tents as the only place to stay. 
They willingly put their lives on the line, 
And whether they live or not, it is they who shine. 

So I salute to them; I give them my heart, 
‘Cause without them, many would be lost in the dark. 


From the Inside, Out 
Many people get themselves in a cage, 
And then they can’t find their way out, 
However, they try to act too hastily, 
And, instead of thinking, they pout. 

They try to squeeze out a small hole, 
So they can get out and be free, 
Or they try to climb the walls, 
Over which they can’t even see. 

They know there’s no easy way out, 
But yet they try and try; 
They might even try shouting for help, 
Until their throats get all dry. 

They act like a wild green turtle, 
Suddenly finding itself locked up in a cage; 
They don’t realize they’re safe in a shell; 
What they should do is just turn another page. 



Midnight Flames 
There’s something magical about 
Sitting around a campfire at night, 
The way the flames dance and swirl 
With their flickering light. 
They eat up the logs; 
They turn them to ashes. 
The very air looks like 
It’s wearing red sashes. 
They slowly lower until 
They touch the dirt, 
Along with your imagination, 
Awake and alert. 
The flames hide tiny gold mines  
That lie underneath. 
Don’t get too close, 
The fire’s got teeth. 
Eventually the wind blows 
And the fire dies out. 
It leaves you to wonder 
What the night was all about. 

Words are like a River
Words are like a river 
           At times they flow smooth, 
                       Words are like a river 
                                   If used right, they can soothe, 
                                               But I never knew ‘til you 
                                   That words, like a river 
Could be so dangerously cold 
             And make me wanna shiver. 
Your words were like a river 
                How I loved the sound 
                       But I can’t hear them anymore, 
                                   ‘Cause you’re no longer around. 
Your words are like a river, 
                                   Water trickling through the bed 
Though you’re no longer here,  
          Your memories still run through my  head. 
And you are just like a river, 
           If I ever fell in and caught cold, 
My love for the water 
                                   Would stay with me ‘til I’m old, 
                                               And even though you’re gone, 
My love for you is the same, 
                       It will stay with me forever 
In my heart from whence it came.

I think they're really good. Some of them sound more like songs than poems, which I like. I think you should write stuff like this more often.

Very nice poems. So, You made these wonderful poems? If so, Your very good at poems! Great Job!

Black Bot : I did, thank you.

Attempting, for the first time in awhile, a new poem:


Emotional Graveyard
I wish there were words enough to say what I accurately feel,
But instead I'm burying myself in worries and troubles unreal.
My grave is damp... and dirty.... and deep,
And yet it seems to be the place I will eternally sleep.
The dirt of this world gets dumped higher and higher,
My shoulders, to bare it all, could never aspire.
I take deep breaths, go through each long-suffering day
Hoping and wishing to escape the maddening fray.
But it seems that every which way I turn my head
There's little life to see, and memories to find dead.

Why is that I struggle to feel what has ceased to exist?
Why is it that my heart finds happiness easy to resist?
Will I smile again, or is this look stitched tight
By the weight of the world and the strength of my fright?
This hole gets deeper, and of light I've forgotten the touch,
How many shovels does it take to substantiate a crutch?
In this cemetary of life, does no hope abound?
Why are there so many lifeless souls to be found?
And tell me this: why do I feel so alone
When I'm surrounded by dirt and dust and bone?

Hi Singelli. Just a new member here, I was checking out the board and noticed the art section. Really nice poetry. Talk to me on my profile if you want to. I will look forward to reading more.

Honestly, those are some great poems (to me). I grew up reading poetry (Bible verses I forgot from 5 years ago...) from the Bible, Where the Sidewalk Ends, and that's it.

BtotheH :  Thank you very much for the encouragement.  Welcome to vizzed, and I'm flattered you chose to top here as one of your first places of interest!

Kyle, the bible has some beautiful poetry indeed!

Singelli : I like the poems, very cool I don't really have a artistic touch or anything but I can tell when someone puts their emotions and heart into them. My sister used to write them and I even wrote one once and it has gotten a lot of good feed back but that was the first and last one I'll write for along time.

they are neat and creative. wow thanks to you i want to write poetry. i just started myown thread of poetry. https://www.vizzed.com/boards/thread.php?id=50494&ppp=20&page=0#692643 please check it out.