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Totts
01-10-11 08:45 AM
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XxChaosxX
01-20-11 12:58 AM
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Shivering in the cold

 

01-10-11 08:45 AM
Totts is Offline
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| ID: 310452 | 72 Words

Totts
Level: 97


POSTS: 1025/2427
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LVL EXP: 9072963
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I wrote a song today and it is like a poem I once heard as a child.

As I walk alone,
I wonder,
I am wondering,
Will this ever,
This suffering,
End Between me and you

Now as I walk these streets,
I shiver,
I am shivering,
This warmth missing,
The one I felt with you

Together
No suffering
Together
no suffering
toghether no ending
Just the begining of us we two.
I wrote a song today and it is like a poem I once heard as a child.

As I walk alone,
I wonder,
I am wondering,
Will this ever,
This suffering,
End Between me and you

Now as I walk these streets,
I shiver,
I am shivering,
This warmth missing,
The one I felt with you

Together
No suffering
Together
no suffering
toghether no ending
Just the begining of us we two.

--------------------
Don't mistake my kindness for weakness




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01-20-11 12:58 AM
XxChaosxX is Offline
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| ID: 314648 | 34 Words

XxChaosxX
Level: 94


POSTS: 1120/2260
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CP: 129.5
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Likes: 0  Dislikes: 0
I like this poem. It's simple yet meaningful. You didn't add in a bunch of complicated metaphors and ridiculous comparisons like some poets do. It's well written, but it is also understandable. Nicely done.



XxChaosxX

I like this poem. It's simple yet meaningful. You didn't add in a bunch of complicated metaphors and ridiculous comparisons like some poets do. It's well written, but it is also understandable. Nicely done.

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