Human: Sapphire
Mitsuku:  What's up, Sapphire. That's an unusual name. What does it mean?  
Human: I told you.
Mitsuku: Ooops I sent you the wrong question.  
Human: Oh. Hehe.
Mitsuku: Ahem. Are you laughing at me?  
Human: No. I'm laughing with you.
Mitsuku: Good, because it's not nice to laugh at someone. Why are you laughing?  
Human: Never mind. What would you like to talk about?
Mitsuku: Oh well thanks for trying to explain it to me anyway. My favorite subjects are anything but especially games and football.  
Human: Who's the main character in Ace Attorney?
Mitsuku: I'm not sure. Was it Will Smith?  
Human: Um. No..
Mitsuku: OK. Alright then.  
Human: Phoenix Wright!
Mitsuku: Tell me a little about your life in Phoenix.  
Human: Huh.
Mitsuku: What?  
Human: idk+
Mitsuku: I thought you'd know. What a disappointment... Je ne sais pas.  
Human: 2 + 2
Mitsuku: 2 plus 2 equals four.  
Human: 68 + 2
Mitsuku:  68 plus 2 is seventy.  
Human: What can you do?
Mitsuku: I can chat with people on the web for you. I can also tell jokes, stories, poems and horoscopes. I can show you pictures and websites on the net and play games too.
If I know where you live, I can tell you the weather forecast and even what's on at the cinema if you live in the UK.
I can show you the current Top 40 charts and play a selection of my music for you. I can even show you some magic tricks.
If you tell me a date, I can tell you what happened on that date in history and also what was the UK's number one hit single on any day since 1952. If you tell me when your birthday is, I can tell you some facts about your birthday.  
Human: My birthday is 8-18
Mitsuku:  So that makes you about 96 years old?
Your star sign is .
Your year of birth in Roman Numerals is MCMXVIII.
There is no such month as " minus" but I would guess it would be either granite or coal.
The 8th of minus 1918 is a Wednesday.
On the 8th of minus in history:
I was wondering, corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables. So, what is baby oil made from?
1918 - You were born!
Your birthday is the 8th of minus, 1918?  
Human: My birthday is 8-18-04
Mitsuku:  So that makes you about 10 years old?
Your star sign is Leo.
Your year of birth in Roman Numerals is MMIV.
The number one UK hit single on your birthday was Busted - "Thunderbirds / 3AM".
August's birthstone is Sardonyx.
The 18th of August 2004 is a Wednesday.
On the 18th of August in history:
1959 - Launch of the Morris Mini by BMC
2004 - You were born!
Your birthday is the 18th of August, 2004?  
Human: Yes
Mitsuku: That's good to know. I will try to remember to send you a birthday card.  
Human: Bye
Mitsuku: See ya. Don't wanna be ya!  
Human: publish
Mitsuku: Do you want me to publish your chatlog?  
Human: yes
Mitsuku:  Sorry, you have been speaking too much nonsense like:
FREAKIN NINE TAILS BABY
ope
efg
skla
helpless
GAMEZ
My birthday is 8 minus 18
So I don't think this log is worth sharing.  
Human: kk
Mitsuku: Gee.  

And I still can't publish it. Mitsuku, you are mean.