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ukala
03-14-12 09:55 AM
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Cyro Xero
03-14-12 02:23 PM
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What do you think of my poem?

 

03-14-12 09:55 AM
ukala is Offline
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| ID: 550977 | 88 Words

ukala
Level: 10


POSTS: 6/16
POST EXP: 491
LVL EXP: 4256
CP: 10.0
VIZ: 230

Likes: 0  Dislikes: 0
i see you in pain,
i see you cry upon a harsh lullaby,
will you learn to see the world
how i see?.
i guide you though the mist of
the forest
hoping that when we
reach the end you
will learn the truth and be honest.
will you open up to me as i have to you,
the scream's i have
endured to see you once
again, my heart will
race my spirit will fall,
but it'll be worth is to see you fight
ageist them all.
i see you in pain,
i see you cry upon a harsh lullaby,
will you learn to see the world
how i see?.
i guide you though the mist of
the forest
hoping that when we
reach the end you
will learn the truth and be honest.
will you open up to me as i have to you,
the scream's i have
endured to see you once
again, my heart will
race my spirit will fall,
but it'll be worth is to see you fight
ageist them all.
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03-14-12 02:23 PM
Cyro Xero is Offline
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| ID: 551035 | 37 Words

Cyro Xero
Level: 110


POSTS: 2624/3193
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CP: 2389.3
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Likes: 0  Dislikes: 0
Pretty good poem. I wouldn't mind seeing some that are uplifting, though. While yours isn't necessarily depressing, a lot of people tend to make them that way.

This does belong in the story forum, by the way.
Pretty good poem. I wouldn't mind seeing some that are uplifting, though. While yours isn't necessarily depressing, a lot of people tend to make them that way.

This does belong in the story forum, by the way.
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Record holder: Posted from 3 different continents in 24 hours- Sep. 27, 2010


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