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Neyro
05-27-05 07:31 PM
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07-11-05 03:34 AM
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Redneck letter

 

05-27-05 07:31 PM
Neyro is Offline
| ID: 27856 | 343 Words

Neyro
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Dear Redneck Son;

I'm writing this letter slow because I know you can't read fast.

We don't live where we did when you left home. Your dad read in the newspaper that most accidents happen within 20 miles from your home, so we moved.

I won't be able to send you the address because the last Arkansas family that lived here took the house numbers when they moved so that they wouldn't have to change their address.

This place is really nice. It even has a washing machine. I'm not sure it works so well though: last week I put a load in and pulled the chain and haven't seen them since.

The weather isn't bad here. It only rained twice last week; the first time for three days and the second time for four days.

About that coat you wanted me to send you, your Uncle Stanley said it would be to heavy to send in the mail with the buttons on, so we cut them off and put them in the pockets.

John locked his keys in the car yesterday. We were really worried because it took him two hours to get me and your father out.

Your sister had a baby this morning; but I haven't found out what it is yet so I don't know if your an aunt or an uncle. The baby looks just like your brother....

Uncle Ted fell in a whiskey vat last week. Some men tried to pull him out, but he fought them off playfully and drowned. We had him cremated and he burned for three days.

Three of your friends went off a bridge in a pick-up truck. Ralph was driving. He rolled down the window and swam to safety. Your other two friends were in back. They drowned because they
couldn't get the tailgate down.

There isn't much more news at this time. Nothing much has happened.

Love, Mom

P.S. I was going to send you some money but the envelope was already sealed.

I LOVE this one!! Its halarious! XD
Dear Redneck Son;

I'm writing this letter slow because I know you can't read fast.

We don't live where we did when you left home. Your dad read in the newspaper that most accidents happen within 20 miles from your home, so we moved.

I won't be able to send you the address because the last Arkansas family that lived here took the house numbers when they moved so that they wouldn't have to change their address.

This place is really nice. It even has a washing machine. I'm not sure it works so well though: last week I put a load in and pulled the chain and haven't seen them since.

The weather isn't bad here. It only rained twice last week; the first time for three days and the second time for four days.

About that coat you wanted me to send you, your Uncle Stanley said it would be to heavy to send in the mail with the buttons on, so we cut them off and put them in the pockets.

John locked his keys in the car yesterday. We were really worried because it took him two hours to get me and your father out.

Your sister had a baby this morning; but I haven't found out what it is yet so I don't know if your an aunt or an uncle. The baby looks just like your brother....

Uncle Ted fell in a whiskey vat last week. Some men tried to pull him out, but he fought them off playfully and drowned. We had him cremated and he burned for three days.

Three of your friends went off a bridge in a pick-up truck. Ralph was driving. He rolled down the window and swam to safety. Your other two friends were in back. They drowned because they
couldn't get the tailgate down.

There isn't much more news at this time. Nothing much has happened.

Love, Mom

P.S. I was going to send you some money but the envelope was already sealed.

I LOVE this one!! Its halarious! XD
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05-27-05 07:39 PM
geeogree is Offline
| ID: 27859 | 17 Words

geeogree
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heh, that is good...

it makes you wonder if there are people this stupid in the world....
heh, that is good...

it makes you wonder if there are people this stupid in the world....
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05-27-05 07:49 PM
Neyro is Offline
| ID: 27864 | 11 Words

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Lol, yep. I got it from the internet and added soemthings.
Lol, yep. I got it from the internet and added soemthings.
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05-27-05 08:33 PM
shredknives is Offline
| ID: 27871 | 12 Words

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Thats hilarious.
I'm writing slow because I know you don't read fast.
Thats hilarious.
I'm writing slow because I know you don't read fast.
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05-27-05 10:53 PM
John is Offline
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lol, thats pretty good
lol, thats pretty good
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05-27-05 10:55 PM
Neyro is Offline
| ID: 27912 | 9 Words

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Pretty good??!! YOur supposed to bust a gut! XD
Pretty good??!! YOur supposed to bust a gut! XD
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05-29-05 12:09 AM
ff_freak is Offline
| ID: 28343 | 34 Words

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llol...funny funny stuff...I once saw this church Blooper thing..it was funny...I should try to find it and post it here...(for all you christians...it's not dising anything about god..it's just somethings that happen around church...)
llol...funny funny stuff...I once saw this church Blooper thing..it was funny...I should try to find it and post it here...(for all you christians...it's not dising anything about god..it's just somethings that happen around church...)
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05-29-05 12:38 AM
Neyro is Offline
| ID: 28353 | 36 Words

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Meh, i hate those funny things that include Relegion in them. For example, theres this Comic, Alein Loves Predator. And they ahve jesus in there.. Anyways.. The point is its not as funny as they think.
Meh, i hate those funny things that include Relegion in them. For example, theres this Comic, Alein Loves Predator. And they ahve jesus in there.. Anyways.. The point is its not as funny as they think.
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05-29-05 01:33 AM
John is Offline
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Originally posted by Neyro
Pretty good??!! YOur supposed to bust a gut! XD


it wasn't bust a gut, but it was funny
Originally posted by Neyro
Pretty good??!! YOur supposed to bust a gut! XD


it wasn't bust a gut, but it was funny
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06-01-05 02:21 PM
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XD *falls on floor laughing, laughing so hard he can hardly breathe*

XD *falls on floor laughing, laughing so hard he can hardly breathe*
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06-02-05 12:18 AM
BigBob85 is Offline
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LOL!!! *printed it off to give to people, telling them its for them*
LOL!!! *printed it off to give to people, telling them its for them*
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07-11-05 03:34 AM
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Pretty funny...I don't think people can be that stupid (I hope) human instinct you see.
Pretty funny...I don't think people can be that stupid (I hope) human instinct you see.
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