I'm being hit by a massive weave of depression right now after coming back from a trip and im not exactly sure why. I don't have any friends that I talk to or hang out with on a regular basis, but I got along with the people on this trip really well. I guess I should try to continue my friendship with them on the regular now. I try to be a positive influence to everyones emotions as much as possible and to myself as well, because happiness is a choice, but right now I feel so terrible I need advice. Should I try to get with the girl I want to be with, or is there something else I should do first? I know I'm probably making myself sound very mentally ill here, if any of you have anything to reply here I'd really appreciate it. thank you for reading

I am in no way a licensed therapist, but I've been in a situation much like yours before.

First, I encourage you to reach out to these people that you got along with, as you are able to. Making new friends and connecting with old friends can ease the feelings of depression that you are feeling.

Second, it's great that you try to positively influence those around you, but take your own feelings into account as well. If you don't have the energy to share then, you're going to do yourself more harm than good.

Third, you are absolutely correct, happiness is a choice, right up until it's not. By this, I mean that there are you can always find some amount of joy every day, but the truth is that the world is a hard place. There's no shame in reaching out for help when you need it. If you need it please seek help!

Fourth, about this girl, have faith, and take it slow. For now build a friendship with her and get to feeling like skipercapt again. Romantic relationships come with time, and while this will seem counter-intuitive, listen to your heart and it'll let you know when you're ready to move ahead.

If you get to feeling like you aren't getting better given a some time, or you start getting worse, reach out to a Mental Health Specialist.

The Lifeline:
1-800-273-8255

Crisis Text line:
Text "Home" to 741741

Depression is a very heavy burden to carry on your shoulders, to the point it can eventually block you from seeing an exit.

First things first: don't expect a different result if you don't change anything. If one of the reasons behind your depression is not having anyone to talk or hang out, you have the chance to change it thanks to the people of your trip. Give them a try and see where can this eventually get you up to.

About the girl, give her the chance of starting a friendship as well. Get to know her, what you have in common, how do you feel around each other... Only then will you be able to decide if the next step can be taken. Don't feel down if it can't be taken, you can't judge a book by its cover and in the end all that matters is that you feel good and comfortable around who you choose as your partner in life, something you can only know if you spend time together.

Seeking help is by no means a sign of weakness or any other negative adjective. It's actually the opposite: not admitting the situation you're in and that you don't have the necessary tools to get out of it is the easy way to avoid the problem, but the real courage is shown when you actually try to solve the problem instead of evading from it.

It seriously warms my heart to read your responses right now, the fact that you care enough to type out a paragraph for a random stranger who you'll never meet gives me strong sense of comfort. I really appreciate the advice from both of you, I've dealt with depression for the majority of my life without having a way to vent or even knowing I was depressed. Recently I've been in more serious bouts here and there like after the trip I had to pour it out somewhere, even if it was for strangers.

Sometimes I wanna vent and just say s*** that's on my head in hopes of someone listening. In case you were wondering I am still talking with and planning to hang out with my freinds from the trip and definitely planning on future endeavors with them.

I have a job which is very good for what it is, and I'm about to apply for community college to get a degree in computer science. I don't really have a lack of things to do, but I think I have a lack of strong connections with anyone besides my siblings. I honestly don't belive having close friends would "Cure" my state or anything, but it sure as hell helps, a lot.

As for the girl, I have no idea how it will end up as it's just a crush but if we connect that would make me happy, we seem to enjoy eachothers company which made me happy. I try not to worry about rejection, I just need to regain my will to try, cause it's hard to get motivated to try to make relationships. But I admire her, her ideals and character are really good to me, I don't want this oppurtinity to pass me by without doing anything.

If you've read this far then I'm sorry you had to slog through more of my ramblings, you're both really good people, and I'm absorbing what you wrote to my best ability, thank you.

tl;dr I'm gonna try to make some more friends and get close with my crush and build up my mental and social life and see what happens

First, let me say as a Christian I will pray for you. I have had friends that have dealt with depression it is no joke. I also want to add you do not sound mentally ill to me.

Now for your question about the girl that you would like. I would try to be friends with her at first. Just introduce yourself and start talking to her. Find out what her interests are and if you have anything in common.

Friendship is the foundation for a relationship. Show her how nice you are. Let your good qualities shine. If you do not have a solid friendship the relationship will almost always fail.

If she is talking to somebody else do not give up. Keep being friends with her show her again your good qualities. Lots of people go through several relationships before they find the right one.

Take it from me, don't focus so much on this girl. Keep your mind on other girls that you might be interested in.

Prayers and I hope this helps

tornadocam : I appreciate the advice you went out of your way to share with me here, that gesture alone makes me happy that some random person on the internet cares enough to reply to me here. Believe it or not I will be taking your advice and try not to get too obsessed on one person, I do have a strong tendency to do that and it's something I'm working on, that is having the motivation to just talk to new people and open up.

I am also a believer and I appreciate what you're doing for me, as small as it may seem. God bless you

skippercapt : you are welcome I will be praying and rooting for you