Staff may move this to where they feel it most appropriately fits. I didn't know where to post this thread.

This thread grew out of my constant feeling of sadness I get when the thought of losing my husband or me leaving him behind crosses my mind. I tear up, have to listen to sad music to get the feeling to pass. I get these feelings constantly and have so even before I met my first and only husband. Before (and still currently), the feelings would have surrounded how things would pan out if I were to die, the moment of death, how I would feel when other people die, how I would react to someone trying to save me from death, etc.

I would like this to be a serious thought and even preparation for ourselves because we never truly know when the time will come. I hope this brings peace of mind to some and even a deeper meaning to our lives. This thread may reveal how some of us feel about ourselves or even help us rethink how we are living at the moment and where we really want to be by the time time runs out for this life. Think about your relationships with people. Think about every aspect of yourself and those around you. Every aspect of your life is important. Think about those you love and those you hate. Even those you hate or have come to dislike or not appreciate... You may not know anything about them that caused them to do the thing that upset you or changed your views about them.

All ages are welcome. It is never to early or to late to start thinking about subjects like this.


If you had it your way how would you like to end this life?

What is the worst way you fear you would die?

If you were to find out you were going to die in some way... what would you do? Plan things out? Tell people? Keep it a secret? Not do anything and live the rest of this life till it happens? Go on adventures? Suicide? Disappear quietly? Do you want to reach out to those you have lost contact with?

In some cases the extension of life comes at a cost. How do you feel about the money involved in these cases to prolong your and/or another persons life? Do you want this financial burden? Perhaps you want to let the transition run it's course so that the financial burden becomes less?
(The documentary currently on Netflix "How To Die In Oregon" is a good watch that talks about how this place has legalised assisted/planned suicide for the transition. It talks about the reasons people have started doing this planning for the transition whether financially, personal reasons, or even almost forced to by insurance companies).

Sometimes the transition comes in the form of being in a coma ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coma ). Different forms of Dementia ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dementia ). Do you want people to see you or others this way? Would you want to be kept alive for as long as possible? Let the disease run its course without medical treatment or therapy which costs money?

Who do you want by your side when the time comes? What would you say to them? Would you be alone?

(If you don't know what a eulogy is. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eulogy ) What would be in your eulogy to yourself? Would it be about others around you rather than yourself?
What about the eulogy that is written about others? What would you say to them in the eulogy?
What about the eulogy that is written about you? Which people would write one for you and what would they say?

(If you don't know what a will and testament is. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Will_and_testament ) What is in your will and/or testament? What is happening to what belongings? Money? Organ Donor?

Think about your funeral. What would happen at the funeral? Who would be there? How do you think it would be like? How do you want the funeral to be?

Where do you hope to end up in the next life? What is your fear that the next life could turn out to be? Are you ready for it? Would you want to come back as a spirit? Who do you hope to see in the next life?

Elaborate on all your thoughts. Pick and choose what you want to speak about or speak about all of the above and/or more that I have not mentioned. So much to think about, plan about, hope about... So little time. And yet these are still not all the questions. Add more than what I could think to think about.

May this life and the next life be beautiful in all our own visions on what we know or hope it to be.

I don't want to die yet. I have too much I want to accomplish. If I was to die tomorrow, I would be full of regret and in a fertile state, complete with denial, depression, and anger. I wouldn't want an audience when I die. Sure I believe my life isn't so good, but to die before I accomplished anything is heartbreaking. If I lost everything and worked a lifeless, dead end job and the like, maybe I'd end it all. Right now.... not so much. Thanks for your story.  

I'm not really sure what I would do if I found I was going to die real soon. It's just something that kinduh has to happen before you can really comprehend it, I imagine. If I really had to guess, I'd likely spend the rest of my days helping anyone I could. Mowing the elderly's lawns for them if it's hot outside, donate what I could to charity.... That sort of thing. I'd definitely donate my organs. It's not like I'm using them anymore and I know full well that there's a whole lot of people out there that needs them. If anything, I hate the fact that they'd have to fight over them.

I don't really have a "best way to die" idea because I can't help but feel that it would basically be inviting it... I try not to think about it too much. It'll happen, how it happens, when it happens.

Again, I can't really say I have much of an idea what the least preferable way for me to pass would be because I know there's always a worse way. I'm not superstitious and don't believe in jinxes or the like, but still...

Personally, I would just assume stay alive for as long as I can. I don't think I could ever just submit and pass voluntarily.

I also see no point in a eulogy. I don't want a bunch of people gathering around and making a spectacle of my death. A whole lot of people die around the world every single day, and mine's no different. It's natural.

As for my funeral, I don't want one. If I die soon with having only accomplished what I have, then I'm content that I've served my purpose in life and what's left of my earthly body should be disposed of in the absolute cheapest way possible. A ditch and some gasoline will suffice. Even a brick as a makeshift grave marker is optional. If I live a long, fulfilled life and I turn out to be famous for having done many great things, then I still don't want it to be about me. If anything, I'd give away $100,000 to each of my children, if I have any, and donate the entirety of the rest of my fortune and belongings to a multitude of causes I hand pick. Then, I'd have a wooden funeral pyre built and I'd be put on top. They light it, and hold a sort of reverse wake. Instead of celebrating my passing, I'd have them celebrate my life and thank god for his will to put me here in the first place. After all, I can't really take credit for anything I do, can I? He essentially did it through me.

I didn't write about the topic I made in this thread in my first post. I guess it's time to open up about it.

I want to end this life like the end of the movie "The Notebook". Next to the one I love. Pass away at the same time. So that neither of us has to face the grief that we will feel leaving one or the other behind.

I thought that the worst way I could die would be from some kind of dementia. Losing the memories of everything I hold dear to me. I feel that I show some symptoms already that I can't shake the fear that this could be my fate some day. My memory is quite bad. I feel like things get wiped from my mind. Names of people, places, things. I can't talk about a person, place, or thing without forgetting something about it and not being able to describe it sometimes. People I have known for years... at times I can't remember their names. Places I've been.. I can't describe, name, or even events that took place there seems like they are made up at times. At times I go to the bathroom and leave. I come back and see I didn't flush the toilet... I stand there and think about how, when, where, why... I just can't remember. I use to get headaches all the time and many different types of headaches to migraines all the time. I go to see a chiropractor now and the headaches have almost all but disappeared... but am I just hiding the symptom?. I have gotten lost in familiar places before... I haven't been able to remember the layout of any of the places I've been no matter how many times I have been there. I also misplace things never to see them again... I lost all the rings my husband has given me over the course of the 5 years we have been together... I can't remember birthdays, events, or ages. I can barely remember how old I am. When asked about that I give a number but am never sure that the age is correct. I hope that I am not catching on to what I think I am catching on to. I hope that it is over reacting and that I am just... forgetful.

If I found out about how I would die... I would probably not tell anyone... maybe just my husband... I don't know.. I don't want people crying over me about it. I hope to except the fact that my death is imminent. To know that my suffering here on earth is going to be over. I probably won't have the money to travel the world like I want to. I would maybe spend a bit more extravagantly if I had the funds though. I would spend as much time as I could with my husband till the end. I barely last every second I'm not with him... Spending more time with him might help me with the grieving process... He will be heartbroken though..

I don't want to be a financial burden on others. That may be the main reason I wouldn't tell anyone about it. I want to ride out the course of what is to come without prolonging my suffering and the suffering of those around me. I want the financial impact to be as light as possible..

I want people to know that if I go into a coma or start going into dementia that I want to be put to rest as quickly as possible. Do not resuscitate me if I leave, do not keep me alive if I'm asleep, do not keep me going because you don't want to lose me. For I am ready for the end when it is time.

When the time comes... I wish for my husband to be by my side. I want him to know that this life time was not enough to be together longer than forever, but that he made my time on earth so much more bearable. I would hope he felt the same way. I would wait for him in the next life and that I hope to still be with him in this life in some way or other. I would tell him all the lies I told him, all the things I hid from him. I would tell him I'm sorry for hiding these things from him... I want him to know that I love him very much and that I hope my wish of being with him longer than forever is of truth and not of false hope. I'd wish for him to find someone new to finish his journey in life so that he wouldn't have to be alone till the end. I want him to know that I never knew what happiness was till I met him. Life had no meaning till I met him. He is the meaning of life.

The eulogy would be about how everyone I have met in life has impacted me in some way or another. I would thank everyone and forgive all grievances I have against anyone I did have one on and that I probably already made peace within myself about it in one way or another. I would lastly say that my husband was the meaning of life for me.

I want every cell in my body to be donated. I hope that everything will be used in some form or another... even to re-fertilize the ground some where. What ever my husband wants from my belongings can to him first. Then my family. Then friends. Then donate the rest around the world. I want my money to go to those less fortunate that I.

As much as I don't want my funeral to be sad... I unfortunately love sad songs. All the sad songs that I loved will be played at the funeral with a PowerPoint of translations to songs that are not in English. If the technology and science is available by then.. I hope to have a movie made of what went through my mind in my life , the feelings, the dreams, the thoughts, the emotions, everything translated so that people may then understood why I was who I was in my lifetime. Who ever wants to attend my funeral may attend, even strangers.

I used to feel like I would end up a wandering spirit/ghost that would express my grief to others. That is now my fear of how my next life would be. Endlessly wandering and being a sad spirit always in sorrow and tears. A part of me now wishes to be able to stay by my husbands side till he parts or to be reunited if he dies first. Another part of me hopes to be relieved of the sorrows in the next life and just be free to do what I wish, what ever makes me happy. I hope to see those I never got to say goodbye to on earth before they passed on. To get to know them and how it was for them nearing the threshold of the next life.
I'm wondering what heaven is like if that is where I will end up. I fear What hell is like if I end up there. What is in store for us in the next life. I just hope for peace, happiness, and tranquility at the least where anything is possible.. For now dreaming while sleeping is as close to peace as I can get.



Great replies... 
Ultrajeff : It's great that you are not ready to die. I hope you have goals set for yourself. Whether you accomplish all you want before you die or not is okay. As long as you die knowing that you were living. Living in the sense that you were striving for a life worth the struggle. I hope all plays out for you when it does come along.

m0ssb3rg935 : It's nice seeing that you are satisfied and are at terms with what is to come at the end. This must be a great feeling being at ease with your end of life whether you accomplished all or some or none at all. I hope all plays out for you when it does come along. 

If i were to die tomorrow, it would be in a blaze of glory. I'd choose my fate; dying in turbulent warfare. I'd want to die a hero, fighting for those I believed in, saving others before leaving. Love and desire are beautiful things.

You live in Kapolei and you're sad? Take one cah-ride to the beach, sistah! Sand and waves mo' bettah for feelings, ya?

Ultrajeff : I was in the Marines for six years. Death in combat is extremely unclean, in that the guys that die roll around a lot, feel a tremendous amount of discomfort and fear, and are generally pissed they're dying in some unknown region of a country most people can't find on a map, on some hill in the middle of nowhere.

I would end my life shot to death by two jealous husbands when I'm 90 years old. That's awesome.

I don't really fear death so much for myself. I'd feel bad to leave others behind to deal with it, especially my wife with two kids under five right now. I would only afraid of dying in the next ten years. I'm not concerned with the method or what happens next. Whatever.

The only thing I'd want for my funeral is an open bar. Drink, laugh, tell funny and embarrassing stories about me. I hope people enjoy themselves and realize death is a part of life and it happens.


No wonder you're depressed. I was thinking about this and now I'm all depressed. I look at my kids, full of energy and life, I look outside at the sun shining, and I wonder, "Why worry about the bad. Celebrate the fun of life."

I'm going to go do that now the next sixty years. I'm going to celebrate life.

Even if I'd be intimidated if i carried a gun, if i had the opportunity to participate in rescue missions, I'd be a very happy camper. If i were in a worst case scenario, my death would be execution by firing squad. If i were a political figure who had massive influence on Canada's political system, my choice of death would be quick assassination. Simple, quick and painless. I'd die a hero, and maybe have some sort of influence on Canadian media. As of right now, I desire to live. Life is about loving. Love a lot during your life.

My worst fear of dying would be drowning. I'm not afraid of many things, but the ocean or any large body of water for that matter, paralyses me with fear. How would I like to go? Hm... 


Of old age with my girlfriend/wife, if I ever meet someone.
Sorry about my half-assed answer. I'm just some dumb 15 year old kid on the Internet giving his opinion.

I haven't talked with anyone on this site for a while. It'd be nice to catch up some time, Cam.

Platonism isn't true. There is no end of "this life". We are not immortal. That lie should be obvious. We're going to die and be totally dead. We were not eternally conscious before we identified with this body, and after this body dies we wont identify with anything else. The body and soul are one.