This is a topic I could read and talk about all day. We all have had them right? With the introduction of On-Line gaming during 90s gaming oddities have increased exponentially. Who hasn't had strange conversations with fellow guild members while they are intoxicated? What about the creepy glitches that occur late at night while playing a survival horror game? How about that freaky guy playing Counter Strike at a LAN party who started screaming incoherently at another player for knifing him? These are the stories I want to hear about! So in order to get the ball rolling I'll tell a couple of mine.

City Of Heroes Glitches Favor of Me?
So I used to play City of Heroes before it became free to play. There were several toons that I played with. My main one was a assault rifle energy manipulation blaster . I don't know how City of Heroes is now but back in the day there was this giant octopus that spawned in Independence Port called Lusca. Major pain to kill without a large group of people attacking him and not really worth it unless you were going for the monster killer badge ,which at the time I was. The problem was that I could rarely get a group together to help me and the group usually fell apart before we could take the stupid thing on.

One of the cool things about my blaster is that I had spec'd him for distance for use in the pvp zones. .So one day while I was waiting around the independence bay area I noticed that Lusca had once again popped up. This just annoyed me so much for some reason that day. I dunno if it was the boredom of waiting around for a group to start attacking it or what but something hit a nerve. So I took a shot at it knowing full well I was going to die a ink covered death. I activated my super speed and bolted as far away as I could get while globs of black goo followed me. I manage to jump up on top of a nearby building when the globs hit and drained my health. I was surprised I had survived so I again started to move closer to it then fired. More globs started flying towards me but I kept missing. So I continued to fire and the inky globs kept flying at me but missed.

You see I thought I had discovered a little glitch, Was there a perfect spot to fire at Lusca without being hit? I thought my firing range was just a few pixels beyond Lusca's range, so I continued to fire. Slowly and mean very slowly her health bar was whittling down. The damage I was doing was slightly more then the amount she was regenerating! Hours were spent doing this and her health was only down by maybe 1/10 if even that. It didn't matter though, I was desperate to get my badge, A crowd formed behind me,  they were getting such a kick out of my futile attempt at glory, but they would soon be very sorry.

I'm not sure what happened but suddenly Lusca began attacking the group that was behind me while I stood there firing and taking no damage. The 15 or so characters around me were getting wiped but I kept going. Some of the people PM'd me and asked if I was using some type of hack or if I was a mod. By this time enough people had been killed that another large group of peeved guildies began grouping up and attacking the thing. I was invited to join and finally got the badge. To this day I don't know what happened there but I do know it was full of awesome!

A Store Managers Nightmare Changes Hands

I used to work as a game technician for a company that operated, rented, and sold arcade machines. One of their primary groups of clients were convenient stores. Well as you know machines break down and arcade games are no exception and I would regularly be sent to do the repairs on-site at the locations. It was just not cost-efficient to haul every broken machine back to base for a minor repair. This one day in July we received a call from a store manager who was unintelligibly screaming over the phone. After a short time he calmed down and apologized. He requested that some one be sent down to his store immediately to fix a problem with the machine. Since it was such a slow day I was dispatched immediately to the location.

The store was located in one of the lower income areas of town. Lots of dilapidated houses, overgrown weeds in empty lots, and a surprising amount of kids playing on the streets. The store was a franchised Chevron Gas Station that looked almost new.  Looking around the area I understood right away why the store owner wanted arcade machines in this place. 

When I walked up to the door there was a group of kids of various ages waiting outside of it, some of them were high-school age and others middle-schoolers. There was also a sign on the door saying closed until 3pm.

The kids saw me with my tool-kit and asked me what I was doing here. I explained to them that there was a problem with one of the machines and I was there to fix it which caused several of the older kids to erupt with laughter.  Just as I was going to ask them what was so funny the Store Manager opened the door for me and rushed me inside.

The Store Manager was still very upset and said that he had to close the store until problem with the machine was taken care of. This was the first sign that something was not quite right with this work order. I didn't understand how a broken arcade game could cause a entire store to shut its doors but what was clear was that every minute the store was closed his business was losing money which meant so were we. I asked him which machine had the problem and he pointed over to the "Marvel Vs. Capcom" game in the corner. As I walked over to the game the second sign that something was terribly wrong made itself known....

Every footstep I took closer to the machine the stronger that acidic and rancid became. The apprehension I felt as I stepped around the display rack for crappy knockoff cell phone accessories was stifling. Then I saw it!

The first thought in my head was that someone had spilled a large pot of chili on the floor, I now know that was my mind trying to protect me from the truth....It was liquidy with tiny chunks in it, and it was spread all over the floor, some of it on the front of the machine. I was no longer breathing through my nose at this time, I had without knowing switched to mouth breathing. Still, this did not protect my eyes which will never be able to un-see the sight of diarrhea covering the floor and the front of the machine. In the middle of all that was a pair of kids shoes.

Needless to say, the complete and utter horror of the situation affected me greatly. I could feel the bile moving up my throat and it took all the self-control I could muster to stop myself from adding to the misery that was in directly in front of me. Then the realization of the situation and what was to come hit me. 

This was the problem I was here to fix. There were no broken wires, no burned out flybacks, and no jammed coin slots to repair. There was only this mess that was in front of me and it had to be dealt with. This was not part of my job duties but the game cabinet is made of wood. Wood is absorbent and the longer it was in the mess the less likely we would be able to clean the cabinet. It was good customer service. Taking all this in I made my decision. The Store Manager gave me the supplies I needed and I began to clean. A hour and 4 gallons of Clorox later I had completed my task. Even though everything was done I still did not know why. Then there were the shoes....

The Store Manager was not able why this had happened, he had walked out from behind the counter when the kids became noisy to make sure everything was alright. When he saw the mess he ran the kids out, closed the store, then he called us. He thanked me and apologized for calling me out to do this. I just smiled and walked out. Some of the group of kids were still out there so I approached them and asked what happened.

The oldest looking one stepped up and told me the whole story.

Marvel Vs. Capcom was brand new and all the kids around the machine had been taking turns playing it. One of the kids was playing on his last quarter and had managed to get to Onslaught. The entire time he had to go to the bathroom but held it in because he didn't think any of the other guys would give him the game back if he bailed. No longer being able to hold it and right before the fight started he dropped his pants and let loose. Even after this he kept playing. When he did lose, he calmly stepped out of his soiled shoes and left the store. 

Knowing this I finally left the store vowing never to go on a repair call again unless I know for certain it can be fixed with the items I have in my toolbox.