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A 2 page report on Ravens and Steelers Rivalry
I had to do this report for an ISS assignment for gym. Tell me what you think of it...
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10-17-11 11:20 AM
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A 2 page report on Ravens and Steelers Rivalry

 

10-17-11 11:20 AM
thing1 is Offline
| ID: 482292 | 594 Words

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A 2 page report on the Ravens and Steelers Rivalry
  

    Baseball is often referred to as America’s past time. But today, I believe we can call football “America’s favorite sport.” It has hits, thrills. It has hits, it has thrills, it has ups and downs, and it has all of the emotions of America rolled into one game.


            The hits are sometimes rough and unnecessary. For example, a rough hit would be when the wide receiver gets popped by the safety or the linebacker while the receiver is still in the air, catching and trying to gain control of the ball. An unnecessary hit would be a helmet top helmet hit, such as what James Harrison did to that offensive player last year, and caused the offensive player to become injured. 


            The thrills happen all year. You have your rivalry games, where one team’s history is mixed with another teams. You have your divisional rivalries. I think, and many professionals agree with me on this issue, one of the most intense divisional rivalry games, not just in the NFL, but in sports period, is the Baltimore Ravens and the Pittsburgh Steelers. They both are known for their defense first, and then their offense. If the Steelers defense is ranked number one overall, then the Ravens are right there behind them at number two. If the Ravens defense is ranked number one, then the Steelers are right behind them at number two. The all-time record between these two teams is Steelers 21, Ravens 12. Now, give credit to the Ravens: they have credit for 5 out of 8 beatdowns (when a team defeats another team by at least 14 points).


            The Pittsburgh Steelers history is incredible. I mean, with 565 wins, 529 losses, and 21 ties, all time, which is really good in my opinion. They have legends to their credit for goodness sake: Terry Bradshaw, Jerome Bettis, Franco Harris, Jack Lambert, Greg Lloyd, and Rod Woodson. And those are just the players that have played for the Steelers and have already retired. Plus they have been to 8 Super Bowls (tied with most appearances with the Dallas Cowboys, I believe), and with most Super Bowl wins at 6.


            The Ravens first season in the National Football League was in 1996, going a respectable 4-12 for a expansions team’s first season, despite winning their first game against the Oakland Raiders. The next season, they started 3-1, and finished 6-9-1.  


            But there best season is when they won Super Bowl XXXV (35) in 2000, after going 12-4. They defeated the Denver Broncos at Baltimore 21-3 in the wild card round in their first ever playoff game. Then they went on the road to tate w:st="on">Tennesseetate> to play the Tennessee Titans, and beat them 24-10, after being tied 10-10 in the first quarter. So then they went back to Baltimore to play the Oakland Raiders in the AFC Championship game, and dominated them 16-3. 


            And then they finally traveled to Tampa Bay, tate w:st="on">Floridatate> to play the New York Giants in Super Bowl XXXV (35), and easily winning 34-7.
            The point is, Football may not be “America’s pastime,” but it is definitely America’s favorite sport. There are those teams out there in the NFL who have a very rich history, and a not-so-rich history. Then there are those teams who are just dominate, like the Baltimore Ravens and the Pittsburgh Steelers. Too bad they are in the same division; otherwise, they might actually meet each other in the AFC Championship game every season if they were in different divisions.



A 2 page report on the Ravens and Steelers Rivalry
  

    Baseball is often referred to as America’s past time. But today, I believe we can call football “America’s favorite sport.” It has hits, thrills. It has hits, it has thrills, it has ups and downs, and it has all of the emotions of America rolled into one game.


            The hits are sometimes rough and unnecessary. For example, a rough hit would be when the wide receiver gets popped by the safety or the linebacker while the receiver is still in the air, catching and trying to gain control of the ball. An unnecessary hit would be a helmet top helmet hit, such as what James Harrison did to that offensive player last year, and caused the offensive player to become injured. 


            The thrills happen all year. You have your rivalry games, where one team’s history is mixed with another teams. You have your divisional rivalries. I think, and many professionals agree with me on this issue, one of the most intense divisional rivalry games, not just in the NFL, but in sports period, is the Baltimore Ravens and the Pittsburgh Steelers. They both are known for their defense first, and then their offense. If the Steelers defense is ranked number one overall, then the Ravens are right there behind them at number two. If the Ravens defense is ranked number one, then the Steelers are right behind them at number two. The all-time record between these two teams is Steelers 21, Ravens 12. Now, give credit to the Ravens: they have credit for 5 out of 8 beatdowns (when a team defeats another team by at least 14 points).


            The Pittsburgh Steelers history is incredible. I mean, with 565 wins, 529 losses, and 21 ties, all time, which is really good in my opinion. They have legends to their credit for goodness sake: Terry Bradshaw, Jerome Bettis, Franco Harris, Jack Lambert, Greg Lloyd, and Rod Woodson. And those are just the players that have played for the Steelers and have already retired. Plus they have been to 8 Super Bowls (tied with most appearances with the Dallas Cowboys, I believe), and with most Super Bowl wins at 6.


            The Ravens first season in the National Football League was in 1996, going a respectable 4-12 for a expansions team’s first season, despite winning their first game against the Oakland Raiders. The next season, they started 3-1, and finished 6-9-1.  


            But there best season is when they won Super Bowl XXXV (35) in 2000, after going 12-4. They defeated the Denver Broncos at Baltimore 21-3 in the wild card round in their first ever playoff game. Then they went on the road to tate w:st="on">Tennesseetate> to play the Tennessee Titans, and beat them 24-10, after being tied 10-10 in the first quarter. So then they went back to Baltimore to play the Oakland Raiders in the AFC Championship game, and dominated them 16-3. 


            And then they finally traveled to Tampa Bay, tate w:st="on">Floridatate> to play the New York Giants in Super Bowl XXXV (35), and easily winning 34-7.
            The point is, Football may not be “America’s pastime,” but it is definitely America’s favorite sport. There are those teams out there in the NFL who have a very rich history, and a not-so-rich history. Then there are those teams who are just dominate, like the Baltimore Ravens and the Pittsburgh Steelers. Too bad they are in the same division; otherwise, they might actually meet each other in the AFC Championship game every season if they were in different divisions.

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(edited by thing1 on 10-17-11 12:43 PM)    

10-17-11 11:26 AM
legacyme3 is Offline
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I guess pages must be getting smaller.

This would be one page or so with how I type lol

"The thrills happen all year...

EVERYTHING IN BETWEEN

... And then they finally traveled to Tampa Bay, tate w:st="on">Floridatate> to play the New York Giants in Super Bowl XXXV (35), and easily winning 34-7."

I think honestly, this entire segment can go.

You are writing a 2 page report about football, not the Ravens and Steelers and their rivalry. Focus more on the history of the game, and the culture that a fan goes through. Don't make the focus the rivalry. It can be a bullet point, but not the entire body.

One more word of advice is to put a bit more diction into the writing. As it stands, you say hits, thrills, up and downs, etc very awkwardly, and when you say it later on it sounds almost exactly the same with more filler words.

This is not a bad first draft though. Keep working on it and let me know if you choose to update it.
I guess pages must be getting smaller.

This would be one page or so with how I type lol

"The thrills happen all year...

EVERYTHING IN BETWEEN

... And then they finally traveled to Tampa Bay, tate w:st="on">Floridatate> to play the New York Giants in Super Bowl XXXV (35), and easily winning 34-7."

I think honestly, this entire segment can go.

You are writing a 2 page report about football, not the Ravens and Steelers and their rivalry. Focus more on the history of the game, and the culture that a fan goes through. Don't make the focus the rivalry. It can be a bullet point, but not the entire body.

One more word of advice is to put a bit more diction into the writing. As it stands, you say hits, thrills, up and downs, etc very awkwardly, and when you say it later on it sounds almost exactly the same with more filler words.

This is not a bad first draft though. Keep working on it and let me know if you choose to update it.
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10-17-11 12:28 PM
thing1 is Offline
| ID: 482357 | 23 Words

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legacyme3 : I used double space and 6pt in between with 12 pt. Times New Roman font.

It's updated now. How about that?
legacyme3 : I used double space and 6pt in between with 12 pt. Times New Roman font.

It's updated now. How about that?
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(edited by thing1 on 10-17-11 12:44 PM)    

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