Hi guys...

So i might want to start with explaining about what i know of ALS. It's a disease people can get out of nowhere and as a result, their muscles get disabled slowly. Then the death comes by after all your muscles died. Or, that's what i know. Correct me if i'm wrong.

My stepfather's past basically was also being in a quest for the answer of why he's so freaking tired every time he's done with his job for the day. He does tough things for his job (and i forgot the term), like installing a bathtub, making a kitchen... He repairs and builds things in the house. And he does everything. But recently, my mom began to look for an answer of my stepfather's tiredness on the internet and found what the doctors could've said too. For 36 years (or more/less), he was suffering from a shortage of vitamin B12. So he had to take a cure for that every week. Now, a few minutes ago, my stepfather was incredibly sad and my mom and he talking about something i couldn't hear. Then mom said "Koen, i want to tell you something." in our native language. I sat down on the couch... and heard the horrible news. My stepfather probably (it is not confirmed yet but the chances are big) has the ALS disease. And he has less than 3 years left if he has ALS. He can't even prepare potatoes for dinner anymore, because of his weak muscles. Now, i know from myself i have a muscle syndrome too. I too now have weak muscles (and i always had) but my stepfather technically is now weaker than i am... And my stepfather is a very good man. I don't want to be better than him in something he can't change.

Once the conversation was over, i was shocked. Not crying, just shocked. (i barely cry) And once i went up, i said in my native language "Let's enjoy those future moments together now we can". My mom said she was proud to be my mother because he heard that. It hit both my parents hardly and my stepfather was crying too, even though he's a pretty tough person to fight with. But he also was crying because 'he left me aside'. But he wasn't leaving me aside at all. He was there when i needed him, i said.

I'm totally broken. The only one who actually could protect my mom and me is leaving us. The only one who could provide us a good life is leaving us. But at the same time, he was a very, very, very good father to me. Even though he was not my real father, i saw him as my very own father. I'm gonna miss him after those 3 years or less. I really will.

ALS is a progressive neurodegenerative disease, so it literally rots away the brain and the spinal cord. The voluntary actions via muscular control, like talking, moving, walking, eating, and even swallowing and breathing, slowly but surely go away. They erode and it's a nasty way to die. My wife's grandmother died the same way and it's basically like watching a large bus coming to hit you and you can't move but you have either a few years or less before it smacks you.

I'm sorry. I wouldn't wish ALS on anyone or their family. You're in for a bad time.

What is the takeaway? Don't try to force the creation of memories or go out and do really special things all the time. Everyone will know it's just because of an impending end and it'll be more depressing than just living your lives.

Also, take this as a jumpstart to you getting ready to get your family taken care of. If you can, participate and take over responsibilities your stepfather does. Ask to learn from him, ask for his thoughts and whatever wisdom and strength he can pass on. Come to grips that, yes, he's going to die, but be ready to assume the role of leader in the family. It will give you a sense of taking control. I remember that loss of control when my wife's grandmother was diagnosed. We were all like, "Well, there's nothing we can do and we're all doomed."

You said shocked. I know exactly how you feel. She was heavily involved with us all the time. It was tough.

Good luck, ML. Stay tough.

MarioLucarioFan64 : I'm sorry to hear that. It's never a good feeling when someone dear is going through a rough moment. But, there's still hope right? If he hasn't gone to the Dr. yet and is not yet diagnose with it. Muscle weakness is tied to a lot of different "diseases" that have treatment or surgery. Either way it's still hard to see a loved one in a potential health problem. He seems like a great man and I hope all ends up well for him and your family. Stay strong!

MarioLucarioFan64 : I am sorry to hear that. No one deserves that kind of fate,a prisoner in their own body. But he should get 2 opinions at least to see what they say. It could be something as simple as his thyroid not working anymore. If that is the case,they could "kill" the thyroid with radiation and your stepfather would have to take a synthetic hormone replacement for the rest of his life. Please have him get it diagnosed properly. And if the worst comes to pass,you have to put aside any resentment or anger and help him,whether he needs you to open stuff for him,or help him up,or what have you. I hope it is something simple like a thyroid that is not working well,you can live without one,you just need to take a synthetic hormone for the rest of your life.

MarioLucarioFan64 : I am deeply sorry for you. He sounded like a great man, and I pray for your family that he does not have it. In case he does, spend as much time with him as you can.