marescanog : Okay, I'll take a crack at this. I've had several relationships and I've been married for ten years now with two kids. I love women and I make friends easily.

Life isn't against you. In fact, Life has provided so many potential partners, you have good odds at meeting someone romantically. But it takes work, practice, effort, and planning and when you've been single a long time, you're out of practice. Everyone else in their early 20s has started experimenting and learning how to socialize romantically so you're losing ground by not being in the game. Life isn't against you but it's not rooting for you. You have to go out yourself and go find some new friends.

Why is it easy for me to find women? I'm physical fit because I spend time on eating healthy and exercise and being physically attractive. I smile easily and my job is to literally make friends with people who walk into my building. I've practiced listening and talking and having conversations so I find it easy. I also have pride and confidence and people flock to people with confidence. People who believe in themselves are successful, end of story. I also happen to have a wife who compliments me with my lifestyle. She is strong at the things I'm weak at. She likes some things I don't so our relationship is more like a team effort against the world and life. I have my roles and she has hers and we share the hardship of existence together. We root each other on.

Why do I subject myself and freedom and all that: The reason I'm in a long-term relationship is I have someone I can share experiences with and a teammate for life. It's awesome having complete trust in another person you know is taking care of things for you. Sure, I can't do anything I want but I have a lot of freedom and I can do most things with respect to the schedules of the kids and my wife. And the things I 'can't do' are things I'm not really interested in anymore.


There's no curse. There's just you, everyone else, and you being shy or being afraid of rejection. Go out there, go learn to talk to girls, boys, whatever you're into, and get some practice. Once you have some success, you'll feel momentum start to roll and you're going to be more successful. I was rejected 100s of times before I got good at this. After a while, it's no big deal.

Get out there and control your own fate.

marescanog : Do not give up just yet, even if you think you are unlucky you will find someone who loves you alright so just keep your head held high :3

Currently, I'm 0-4 when it comes to trying to start a relationship, so yeah, you could say that I'm unlucky in love.
So far, I've never had a girlfriend, never been on a date, and never even been kissed/given a kiss (and yes, I'm obviously still a virgin ). That doesn't mean I haven't tried (hence the 0-4 losing streak ).
I've fallen for two kinds of girls so far. Two of the girls were definitely wrong for me, and I hardly knew them, but I thought they were cute and went gaga over them. The other two girls I was/still am good friends with and developed feelings for, but they didn't share those feelings.
It is discouraging when I think about it, and a part of me feels like maybe it's a sign that I'm meant to be single (and forever alone ), or that maybe I'm better off on my own anyway. But another part of me still wants to at least know what it's like to be in a relationship, maybe have a family, just have someone to love and care about until the end.
Honestly, I have a fear of being alone, but at the same time, I don't think I'd mind being alone. It's an odd feeling...
Either way, I know I'm still young, and I still have plenty of time to decide what's best for me, or have fate just hand me what is best for me. Who knows.

I thought I found love, once.  It was back a bit when I felt that first tingle in my heart.  It was a special event at school, and I wanted to go.  Sadly, I was blinded by depression and torment, and I didn't even realize that I let it all slip away.  She had invited me to join her, but I ignorantly declined, not even realizing what I had let go.  It was my first chance to find something, and someone, special for my life.  After everything had passed, a void formed in my heart, something that would never be filled.  I had found love, and I had been forced to push it away.  I've never stopped hating myself since.  It was a heartbreaking experience for me.  I know I'll never get the chance to find anyone like her.  I know I'll never feel what true love is like.  I know I'll only feel miserable as I live the rest of my days alone.

I've had both good luck, and bad luck in finding a relationship. Recently I have found good luck, after running into bad luck, but so far everything is going good. You just have to really give it time, and hope for the best.

Hi, personally I've never had any problems finding a partner. Yet, as much as I've met other people, who can not find any (and I also took some psychology courses at university back in the days), they all tend to have very similar annoying behavioral or personality traits, which they themselves usually do not notice. For example repetitive obsession over not finding a partner, bad self-esteem or sort of trash-talking about their own self (putting themselves down in the eyes of others a la "oh I'm so ugly/unlucky/looser/stupid/[add any other]). Some people are just incapable of being with others, sometimes because of personality, sometimes because of their lifestyle (living in some sort of uncompromising comfort zone), and sometimes also, because they lack interactive/socializing skills (meeting new people, getting to know them, keeping a flowing conversation). Sadly though other people notice them, more often subconsciously, and automatically avoid these people.
All I can say, is if you think you are fine, then you might re-think whether you are going to right places to meet new people (Do you have anything in common with the people you will meet there?). In other case, you might need a help of psychologist. He/she can guide you to learn to interact with people in a little better way to rise your chances of getting a partner. And I am not saying that your communication skills are bad, quite often it's more about how you state the sentence, which words you use etc. It does not apply to friends, as we usually pick very similar people as friends, who can understand halfway through the sentence, what we are saying.

I've never had troubles finding a partner, it's just more of I can't judge whether they're good for me or not. Though it seems, hopefully, that my bad streak of relationships may have just come to an end.

Luckily, I've finally found someone I think I could spend the rest of my life with if things go well, which has never been the case before. She constantly has my best interests in mind, and really brings out the best in me, which is something I desperately need. I think she genuinely cares more about my overall well-being than I do, though I guess the same could be said for the other way around. She's everything I could've ever wanted and more, so I'm extremely happy right now in terms of love. I thank my lucky stars every day for finding what I have.

I feel like replying to this thread again since I had some new found experience after the first time I did. I tried a long distance relationship and in the end... I kind of feel the same way I did before. if a bit less pessimistic. I think it was a good experience to have at least for someone like me who doesn't have much experience otherwise in terms of serious relationships. It ended and looking back at it, it's like in the back of my head I knew it wasn't going to work out because of the nature of it being long distance. Sure that can work for some but with how extreme it was in this case (I lived in Sweden and she in the US) and me finding out I'm not one of those people, it wasn't going to. I guess maybe if we lived in the same country at least there could've been hope, but at the same time it also felt like we kind of grew apart and for something like that to have hope it feels like you need to be 100% certain.

I've yet to have much luck otherwise but like the last time I replied, I don't feel cursed because of it. It would be a lie if I said I never think about it or if I said it's not something I want but it's not something I spend my entire days worrying about. I used to be one of those people who felt like I was cursed. Now, I realize it likely comes down to me being the deciding factor. Never making that effort to go out and try to talk to people partly because I'm bad at keeping a conversation but also because I in stead choose to stay within my comfort zone as the socially awkward introvert I am. I have a hard enough time finding new friends outside of the Internet lol. I try to not let that get to me though, if anything I try to use it as a motivator to improve myself. I'm still working on trying to improve my life overall, become more responsible and being more healthy and I think if I can manage that, my chances of finding a partner will at least improve a little bit. So I don't know if a relationship would be the right thing for me now anyway nor if I've been ready for it. I don't really feel like there would be anyone I'm interested in at my school either which would be the main place I'd have any chance of finding someone. Maybe once I get closer to the point I want to be in my life otherwise I'll start trying to work on it.

I may have been unlucky in the past, and other times temporarily very lucky. The man I'm with now it's crazy to think we ended up together seeing as he was someone I had just admired from a distance at work. But then the stars aligned and all that cliche stuff and next thing I knew we we're together.
A big thing to remember is you may be looking for love, but you also need to look for someone who treats you well, you could score the one person you've had the biggest crush on and they end up treating you beneath them. If you think you're unlucky in finding a partner imagine how unlucky you'd feel if you lived every day being with someone who doesn't appreciate you.
Life leads you in all kinds of directions and as long as you're open about meeting new people I'm sure you can find someone who you got on well with and they'll think you're pretty great.

Yeah my first love was : love at first sight at 15 years old....since i did no move, i was left alone.