This post is going to be kind of dark, I'm warning you now so if you don't like sad stories (not incredibly sad like someone dying or anything like that), then I advise you leave now. I don't know how many of you will actually see this as I don't have many friends on here yet, but this is for anyone who wants to know more about a random person .

   Okay, I'm going to start it with life in 2010. Life was great. I was 9/10, I was having a fun time with my twin brother, who I'm going to call Scott. We played Mario together, we played Sonic together, and we were introduced to Pokémon that year by a friend of ours who was a grade ahead of us. Since these are the games we played before complicated stuff started happening in my life, that's why these are the 3 game franchises that when I see a new game, I feel like I have to get it. We both got Pokémon, Scott got Diamond, I got Pearl. I'm going pretty in depth about this Pokémon thing, just know it isn't very important in the story . I was doing good in school, my brother and I were in different classes. Sadly, this is the time where populars in our school started popping up in our grade and who was popular and who wasn't started happening. Not everyone was in it though, and that was a good thing.

   I fought with my brother occasionally like every sibling will. It was a normal life. My mom and dad lived with Scott, my sister (who I'll call Marie) who was 2 at the time, and me. The whole family would play video games and board games with each other. The main game we would play was Mario Party 6, I don't really know why, but I'm sure that's why it's my favorite Mario Party. I had no idea what was going to happen that same year. One day, I was walking around in my house, I don't remember why, I think I was just hanging around the house. Anyway, I saw my dad sitting on his chair, his eyes watering and him rubbing them. My mom was sitting next to him and Scott and I asked what was wrong. Our mom got up and told us there were just a few financial problems to deal with, nothing much. It was the first time I ever, and I mean EVER, saw my dad cry. It took me a little bit of time, but I eventually shrugged it off. Well, if only I knew there was going to be more happening than just that.

   Okay, there's no easy way to put this: my parents got divorced. When I heard the news, I didn't think much of it. A couple of my friends' parents were divorced, so I didn't think it was too big of a deal. I don't know if my friends who's parents are divorced went through what I'll explain later, but if they did it couldn't have been worse than how I went through it. Anyway, my dad got an apartment to stay at which was probably a mile away, which was good, because I didn't want him to live in a different city or anything like that. Scott, Marie, and I stayed at his apartment only on the weekends. There was only one bedroom, so Marie and my dad slept in there while Scott and I slept on the couches in the living room. My mom flipped when she found out there was only one bedroom, but she realized there wasn't much she could do. Scott, Marie, and I all said it was fine so that calmed her.

   My mom got a new boyfriend (who I named Jordan) and I don't mean to be racist but I just want to get the fact that he was black out of the way. I don't mean to say he was different than us, I mean to say he grew up differently and had different beliefs because of his culture. Anyway, we first met him sometime in September-October of 2011. He seemed nice at first impression. He was laughing the whole time, smiling, and I really thought he would be a fun step-dad type thing. Of course he NEVER would have replaced my dad, but I still thought he was kind of fun. That changed kind of fast. Well, he swore a lot, but he didn't start doing it until he thought we got used to him, so like a month. It had an influence on my mom and she started to swear quite a bit too. Nina was now 3, and all this swearing shouldn't have been around her ears.

   I think I should give you a little background information for Jordan. He had already been arrested for drug dealing, and had a prison record. If I remember correctly, he wasn't only arrested once for drug dealing, but twice! When my dad found out about this, he told Scott and me this. He also told my mom, but she already knew. She said it doesn't matter about his past. It's about what he is like now. My dad said he had a bad feeling about Jordan, and he was completely right. In pretty much every way imaginable. 

   While Jordan was starting to hang around more, my dad told Scott, Marie, and me that he was going to move, but he didn't know where. He said he was tired of being too close to my mom and her family. He said something about moving 20-30 miles away, and like usual, I was fine by it. But the thing is, I'm a person who doesn't understand how bad things will be until they happen. He eventually figured out he was going to be moving 7 states away, into New York. Since I don't understand how bad things will be until they actually happen, I was fine by that too. It seems ridiculous to me that I would think that it was fine, but I was a different person back then. He moved on November 4th, 2011. I had to stay at my grandma's house for some reason, and when we were trying to go to sleep, Scott kept crying. I felt really bad for him, but then I was wondering why I wasn't crying. Was I a heartless person? Well, that wasn't the case because a couple days after, I was crying uncontrollably too. I hated everyone and everything. I cried myself to sleep and my eyes were dry.

   After he left, Jordan was getting worse and worse. He started beating Scott and whipping him with a belt because Scott didn't want to listen to him. I would've been whipped too if I wasn't too scared to stand up for myself. I was whipped one time by him in total, and it was for taking a break while I was supposed to be cleaning the living room which I didn't even mess up in the first place. He yelled at me to go to my room and I ran as fast as I could. I had never been whipped before, only spanked on the butt by my dad when I didn't listen.  My mom didn't even do anything. She acted like it had never even happened. She acted like Jordan was the best thing ever to happen to her and that him beating Scott and me wasn't happening. I was mad at both Jordan and my mom. I never said anything about it though, and that's where Scott came in. My mom said if he ever has any feelings about Jordan to go to her. He did that and she would get mad at him. So mad that she would tell Jordan, then Jordan would whip him. He got whipped almost everyday. If Jordan told him to go upstairs and he wouldn't, he would aggressively carry him up the stairs and drop him at the top, and my mom just said, "You knew what was coming."

   My dad visited us in August of 2012, 9 months after he moved. He stayed for about 2 weeks, and if I remember correctly, we were in my mom's house. She didn't really want him to, but he had no other choice. I remember when he stayed we got haircuts, went to a place called the Wisconsin Dells (amusement and water parks galore), and went to a place where there are a lot of inflatables. It was a lot of fun and when he had to leave, I was fine until nighttime. That's when I let it all out. I got to see my dad again and it felt like he never left. We had fun like we used to. And then all that got taken away again. Like I did the time before, I cried myself to sleep.

   In late March of 2013, my mom went to a rehabilitation center 3 states away. I actually have no idea why, she might have told me, but if she did I obviously wasn't paying attention. It might have been for a food disorder because if I remember correctly, she used to be bulimic (throw up your food so you don't gain weight). She stayed there for 3 months and I was really sad without her even though she was spending less and less time with me anyway. During these 3 months, Scott, Marie, and I stayed at our house with our grandma. She was the one who took care of us. 

   My mom was able to come home for my 6th grade graduation, and so was my dad. This was also a time when I got to spend time with my dad so I'll tell you about that in a little bit. Okay, my mom came home from where she was staying for the 3 months so she could watch me graduate from 6th grade. She was only able to stay for 2 days, but I was willing to take it. Being able to see her for a little bit is better than not seeing her at all. Anyway, my dad wanted to see Scott and me graduate so he came to visit. We stayed in a motel I think. We went to a roller skating rink and stayed there for like 2 hours. Honestly, it was more fun than it sounds. It was fun watching my dad try to skate and it was overall one of the most fun things he has done with us. He stayed for about a week and then had to leave again. Of course it was sad, so I cried like I always do when he leaves.

   Next thing I have to talk about is that Jordan ended up going to jail. I think it was in August of 2013. I should mention he had his own apartment and he wasn't living with us. He was staying around a lot during the day though. He went to jail for getting behind in his finances. Now I don't know about you, but 90 days in jail? My mom had to have been keeping this hidden for a long time if he owed that much money. The reason I think that was why and it wasn't because he was doing other stuff is because 90 days is too little for someone who already has a record. 

   When Jordan came back, he didn't change from jail. He still whipped Scott, still bossed us around, and still swore like he was a sailor. I know the last part is a given because he's probably been doing it his whole life, but could he at least calm it down around my now 5 year old sister? Since Scott was still being treated the same, he told me that he wanted to move to New York and live with our dad. I told him a whole bunch of reasons why he shouldn't and I started crying. He contemplated it and decided he'd stay. He wanted to stay for me, but eventually it got to be too much for him. He went up to our mom and told her he wanted to live with our dad. She didn't know what to say at all. She was shocked that he'd want to be away from Jordan this badly. After a couple of weeks of her thinking about it, she finally said yes to make him happy. She realized that if she isn't making her child happy, she needs to make sure he goes somewhere where he can be happy.

   Scott and my birthday is on December 8th for those of you who don't already know. So, yes we did have something fun planned (not just sitting at home playing video games). We went to the Wisconsin Dells (you know, the place with all the parks I talked about earlier?). Anyway, we stayed at a cool hotel for it and it was really fun, not going to lie. We went to this place called Mount Olympus, and they have a lot of roller coasters running during the summer, but since it was winter, we had to go to the indoor water and theme parks. Inside the indoor theme park, there is a Frogger ride (search it up if you don't know what I'm talking about), teacups that you move the middle wheel to spin as fast as you can, bumper cars, go-karts, and a mini roller coaster called OPA! There's also a small bus ride thing that takes you above the ground, but that's for little kids. Anyway, had fun in there, then we went to the indoor water park. Again, had a great time in there, lots of swimming was involved. I brought my laptop with to play games on and of course had a lot of fun playing video games (In case you're wondering, I was mostly playing Need For Speed: Most Wanted from 2005). Sadly, this was the last birthday I celebrated with Scott before he moved to New York.

   My dad visited shortly after Christmas and we got more haircuts. I remember we went to this restaurant afterwards and got some breakfast food even though it was almost noon. We stayed in a hotel and it was fun because they had a pool. We got to go swimming at a time you normally can't because of the snow. What could be better? Anyway, I can't remember exactly what we did, but he stayed for a couple days this time. When he left, he took Scott with him, and my eyes were already watering before he gave me his hug. My mom asked me if I was okay and in a trembling voice I said I was fine. I immediately went upstairs, trying not to look like I was sad, and went into my room, closed and locked my door and cried my heart out. This was so much worse than all the other times. Not only had my dad left, but my twin brother too? My brother that I had known since I was born and the only person I really talked to from Pre-k through 1st grade? When I said at the beginning that my friends' feelings couldn't be worse than mine, this is what I meant. My dad and brother both moved 7 states away and my only ways to reach them is through the internet and the phone.

   On June 21 of this year (2014), I got to see my dad and brother after 6 months of not seeing them. It was awesome, my mom met my dad in Chicago and we stayed the night in a hotel called The Super 8. If you do the math, it was a pretty unequal distance for them to travel. My mom only had to travel barely 2 states while my dad had to drive 4 states. He'd complain but it's completely worth it to see your kids again after 6 months. After we stayed the night at a hotel that has a pool (woop), our dad took Scott, Marie, and me to New York. It was a long drive (5 hours to get to Chicago in the first place, 12 and a half hours to get to New York from Chicago). We went everywhere once we were in New York. We went to Sky Zone (a place with a whole lot of trampolines), I got a haircut, we went to a lot of different  thrift stores looking for electronics (me and my brother like to look for electronic parts), we went to a game store and we traded in our Xbox 360 for a Ps3 and CoD Bo2, CoD MW2, Battlefield 3, and my brother gave me his GTA IV and V discs since he had the digital versions on his Ps3. The best part by far was going to Darien Lake. It's an amusement park that is by where they live. I got to go on a whole bunch of roller coasters, including Ride of Steel and Moto Coaster . There was the Silver Bullet, which is really just the enterprise, and there was also a swing ride that spun you really fast. Some of my favorite parts was going to all the different restaurants because they're almost all different there than here. We went to Ted's Hot Dogs, Mighty Taco, and a lot of other restaurants I can't place my finger on right now. My dad made his homemade mac'n'cheese which is the best mac'n'cheese I have ever tasted, not going to lie. We literally ate it all in like 15 minutes. We made him make it again for another night. I brought my gaming computer with me to New York (I bought it with my own money like a year before) and Scott and I played on our computers together. His computer wasn't much of a gaming PC at the time, but it was still fun. Anyway, I had to come home after 2 weeks.

   Awesome part was though, that Scott got to come back here for 2 weeks! We did pretty much the same things we used to do. We went to the pool, we played video games with each other, things were great. We hung out with friends and talked like he was never gone. We went to the county fair there was going on and there were a whole bunch of thrill rides that Scott didn't want to go on. I saw one of my friends there and went on all of the thrill rides with him. He said he hated me for making him go on them, but I know he had fun. I went with Scott on a few rides there and we had fun. We did other things but again, can't remember. When he left, you can guess, I cried.

   After Scott went back, in early June, Jordan went back to jail. My mom told me she was completely done with him in every way and she said she was getting rid of all his junk, and we were keeping his TV. He was in jail for, I don't know, 5 months? Anyway, the whole time he was in jail, it was because he was framed for doing something that he didn't do. The reason he stayed for so long was because he had already been to jail 3 times. Well, he came out of jail in early November, and of course, because my mom found out he was framed, she took everything she said about letting him go and flushed it down the drain.  My mom told me that he really has changed and that I had to see it for myself to believe it. She told me numerous things but one of those things struck me hard. She told me that Jordan wants to marry her. My eyes immediately started to water up and I told her I didn't like him at all. Well, the police forced him to live with us because they can't trust him anywhere else. I was so mad because of this, but it was better because he wasn't allowed to tell me what to do anymore. So, he came back into our house. I was angry about it, but I wasn't going to say anything.

   He's been living with us for a month now because it's December. I still don't like him. I do have to admit, he is somewhat nicer than he was before. But that might just be because he doesn't want to go back to jail. One time I overheard him on the phone. He said and I quote, "We're gonna be gettin' the money now! Hehehe." I don't know if this is just him talking about his job or selling drugs, but I'm getting extremely paranoid about it. My mom said when he got back he would let go of a lot of his hood friends, but it doesn't look like that's changed. He still swears all over the place and doesn't care about it at all. After all that has happened, he still doesn't look like he's changed. And that means that I still don't like him.

   I will be seeing my brother for Christmas and I think he's staying for 2 weeks . It is something I am excited for, and I really can't wait. It's been another 6 months since I've seen him and I don't how much longer I'm able to wait. I didn't expect this post to be over 3700 words long, but if you read the whole thing, respect. I posted this mostly to get my feelings out, and I have to admit I feel quite a bit better now. If you guys want to chat with me about it, go ahead. This post shows you some of the darker aspects of my life, but I'll post one about the good things in my life at some point. This post took me around 4 hours to make because I had to go on Facebook and find out exactly when some of these events happened, and if you know me, you know that I go into detail when I type. I hope this gave you some information about what my life is like right now, peace .

This may have been 3700+ words, but it was not a hard read at all. You're a very talented writer for someone who's only 14 years old, and you're very brave to tell us so much about yourself.    (One word of advice I'd give though... at your age and in your situation, I'd put some phony names in there.)

I think the first question that's going to be on everybody's mind is about your mother's boyfriend 'beating' on you.  What do you mean by this?  I got 'beatings', but they were in the form of spankings, for the most part.  They weren't abusive.   I understand that a lot of kids don't get spanked today, so spankings might be quite a shock..... but they're (in my opinion) usually not abusive.  (They CAN be.... but I'm not talking about extreme cases.)  Is your mother's boyfriend punching you in the gut, slapping you in the face, kicking you in the legs, etc?  Think about this very carefully, because physical abuse is a very, very serious matter.  If this man is physically beating you, you need to tell your mother.... and if your mother won't listen, you need to tell the police.

(Also, I'm pretty sure the police can't FORCE him to live there.  That would be a burden on your family that takes away your liberties and rights.  Even if my brother was an un-trustable criminal, they couldn't FORCE him to live with me just because he's related to me.)

Now that that's out of the way.... let's assume these 'beatings' and whippings are not abusive.

Your story is very sad indeed.  Divorce is becoming such a common thing nowadays, and people don't understand how it rips families apart.  I have a twin myself, and though she hates me... I think I'd be quite distraught if she were somehow taken from me while we were kids.

How seriously have you discussed the issue with your mom?  The boyfriend doesn't seem like a great guy, and although I think most kids nowadays are raised in 'cursing' homes... it sounds like you haven't been.  What are the gems that your mom sees in this guy?  Have you tried asking her what positive things she's attracted to in him?  I knew a woman like this with a 16 year old daughter and 2 year old twins, and you can read what happened to them (and me) here.

Please, please don't ever let yourself get into a situation like that.

Otherwise, I'm not sure what I can say without being redundant.  Take care of your safety as much as possible, as well as your sister's and mother's.  Keep away from the boyfriend as much as possible.

And of heaven's sake... find the positive side of life!  I saw a lot of great things going on in your post!  Not everything is perfect, nor will it ever be.  But there are moments, things, and people which bring us happiness.  To my knowledge, you're not starving, you have a roof over your head... you're not sick, and you have a capable, healthy body.  How great is that!?  Find a passion and throw yourself into it.  Exercise. Eat well.  Sleep enough.  And by golly, I'm sure things will seem easier!

(And talk!  Write!  Do both!  Like me, it seems writing might be a form of therapy for you. And nothing is better than knowing people have your back.)

God bless!

Singelli :    Thanks for reading the whole thing, it makes me feel better to see that someone cares enough about the situation to read the whole post ). The phony name thing probably would have been a good idea, I just was pretty sure I trusted everyone on here. I'll make an edit . By the way, thanks for the complement about my writing . My friends don't even know I can write like that, and quite frankly, I didn't know either. I've been an amazing speller since around 3rd grade and my spelling has always better than my friends. I got 2nd place in a spelling bee against mostly 6th graders when I was in 4th grade. 

   By beatings, I don't mean punched in the gut or anything like that. The only thing he really did was either whip me with his belt (he only did it once, but it was painful that's for sure). I wasn't so much worried about my safety, I was worried about my brother's. Like I said in the post, he was whipped almost everyday. The reasons for this being either that he wasn't going to listen to what he told him to do, or he would talk to my mom about how much he hated him and then she'd tell her boyfriend. I was scared for him, scared for me, scared for my sister, and I was scared of my mom. I have to admit, my brother had more courage than I've probably ever had. When I say he stood up to him, I don't mean he'd just not listen to him, he would get up and scream at him. My mom was actually hit in the face by him because he was drunk. My brother, sister, and I all saw it. We saw it right in front of us. She said she was done with him but a week later that was gone.

   About the police forcing him to live with us, I'm not even sure if that's what it is. My mom still likes him and I'm pretty sure that was an excuse for him to live with us. Then again, his parole officer did come over here and talked to my mom about the whole situation. I'm not the type of person who wants to snoop so I didn't hear anything important. Also, my mom said he isn't forced to live here for a while, only for 2-6 months probably. If 2 months, hooray because that means only one more month to go, but since, "Marriage has come up," I have no idea what to think. Of course if they ask me my opinion on them getting married I'm going to say no. If they go ahead and do it anyway, I'll tell her I'm going to move to New York. I wouldn't be bluffing either, because I don't even remotely like the idea of my mom getting married to him.

   My mom had a very serious talk with me before he came into the house for the second time. We talked about my thoughts on him moving in and I said I didn't like it at all. When she asked me why, I said, "I don't think he's changed, and he just doesn't seem like a good person." When she told me about the marriage ordeal, I almost started crying. My eyes watered and I told her I didn't want that at all. What my mom said probably about a year ago in a restaurant we visited was that she got help from someone to change and now she feels like it's her turn. I honestly don't know what she was talking about when she said this, but she wasn't talking to me, she was talking to her friends.

   Anyway, the reason I wrote this was because it really is a form of therapy for me . I'm really bad at coming up with ideas to write about but once I get something, you can't stop me . That's why this post was 3700 words . Again thanks. It feels good to know there are people who care as much as you do.

That's gotta be rough. But I've never experienced that in my life, so I wouldn't know. That guy Jordan shouldn't be cursing like that, though. My mom lived in the ghetto when she grew up, but I rarely hear her curse at all. Also, you and your brother reminds me a lot of my sister and I. Anyways, I don't want to talk a whole lot about myself, since this is YOUR thread-- not mine. xD This will only be for a season-- meaning the life you have now will not be forever, so hang on tight!

Kuti_Kat : Did you actually read the whole thing too? Again glad to see do care about more than themselves and it's okay if you talk about yourself, I don't mind. We did just friend each other, so... If we are gonna be friends, might as well know a little about each other (I think I've shared a fair amount on my side of the bargain with this whole thread ). Haha, peace .

MCJungleKitty : Yeah, I read the whole thing. xD I tell more about myself through a PM, since I'm more of the private type of person when on the internet.

MCJungleKitty : I read your whole thread as well and it touched me what you said just made me want to keep on reading i'm glad you shared this with us and I hope that the rest of your time will get better. Hopefully your mom can soon see the light and finally get through to you as your her children and only you should be the top priority should be forming you into great humans who can do wonderful things but we do have those who instead become corrupt, that's all I am going to say though. And that your little sister can grow up to be a nice person not under the influence of a bad boy-friend. Good luck you mate.

I was quite sorry to hear about what had gone on in your life at such a young age. But I am also surprised you actually made it through something like that. I myself have not went through that exactly but I have been through something similar. Me and my family were evicted from our apartment, so I lost all contact with everyone besides my family. We had to move in with our grandma who didn't like us unfortunately xD over the course of about 4 years my parents fought every day and are really unhappy with each other, as my mom has an alcohol problem.

However they cannot get divorced due to the price of $2500 because their are minor children involved. So they are stuck in misery.

But not only did you lose contact with everyone outside of your family, you lost contact with a lot of your family too.

I don't like my brother much, but he has had my back and I can respect that.

Although I hope you aren't too depressed after the events of this. This isn't something a kid should go through, and it would be a shame for you to come this far and lose hope like that.


Also from this post I realize that you are pretty mature! Mature 14 year olds unite! *highfive*

yoshirulez! : Pfff, you only think I'm mature . I'm not very mature when it comes to hanging around my friends and talking about normal everyday things, but when there is something serious I need to say, I forget all about joking around and I say it with all seriousness. I honestly don't know if my real friends have seen my serious side . They're all too busy joking around because their life isn't too bad. I mean sure, a lot of my friends' parents are divorced, but they still live with 30 miles away. It's pretty different for me sadly .

   Man, there are so many people to reply to, haha, I literally am trying to reply to 3 people right now including you . I'm going to add you as a friend because you highfived me . But honestly, it means a lot for you to read an entire novel like this and to feel the need to comment about it to make me feel better. I'm not too depressed, but it comes over me every once in a while which I guess makes sense. I haven't lost hope, I know that when I' m older I'll be able to move where I want, do what I want, and be with the people I want to be with and there's nothing my mom's boyfriend can do to stop that. Peace .

deg2000 : Thanks, and it really does make me feel better when I see that people actually want to read what I post, especially if it's something serious. I knew the Vizzed community was nice when I first joined over a year ago. After I made the account, I didn't go on it again until this year because I forgot about Vizzed. Over this weekend, I felt like playing some old games because I forgot my phone at school, but then I remembered about Vizzed. That was when I posted the thread about saying hi again.

   I'm happy I did come back because I have helped others just like you guys have helped me. I talk to the new people, I say happy birthday to the birthday boys and girls, and I help people who have serious questions who really thank me later. It makes me feel good to know I'm helping someone through the internet. Those people who say video games mess up your head have probably never played a video game. If it weren't for video games, I wouldn't be on Vizzed having the time of my life and feeling good by helping others . It's all thanks to people like you who care for others who are feeling down, and try to cheer them up . Thanks for that, and peace .

By the way, whoever gave me those trust points, thanks a lot. It means a lot to know that you trust me and believe in me . Those are the first trust points I've ever had and I just want to say thanks. It sounds a little stupid to say thanks for something you can't redeem for anything in reality, but you just have to remember that those things you are thankful for on here are more than words, they're symbols. When I say thanks for the trust points, I don't think about it as if it's in game currency or anything along those lines, I think of it as the fact that someone out there trusts me just from what they know me as from the internet. It means that people are really sorry for what I've had to go through, and that's why Vizzed is more to me than just a website with friendly people and a lot of games. Thanks you guys for the comforting thoughts you give me . Peace .