(A/N: This is a fiction/non-fiction piece. I wasn't sure where to place this particular piece so I put it here!)
Dear Stranger,
Gosh, it's been a long time since I last wrote you a letter. I just wanted you to know that I haven't forgotten you and that my last letter to you was written in sorrow and in grief, remembering all of the words that have been said and the things that have been done. I remembered that you told me that I was dead to you and that I didn't love you. The only things that I felt that fateful day (on my thirteenth birthday--a day that I will never forget) was anger, hatred, and sorrow. I was angry because I loved you and you said something that wasn't true. I hated you for saying those words when I needed you the most as I transitioned from child to teen and from one environment to another. I needed my mom but you refused to be that for me...thus, my sorrow was born. The sorrow I felt at being cast aside like nothing more than a useless piece of garbage. There are nights, yet, almost twelve years later, that I long to call you mommy, despite my age. My dreams of you haunt me as they tease me with your motherly presence, only to be ripped away when the dawn of a new days arrives. That empty and hollow feeling that I get when I return to reality, trying to grasp onto the beautiful and good things--as few and far between those might have been--that I experienced growing up.
Today, I write this letter as a form of closure, a form of peace, and a form of forgiveness. I admit that I still resent you from time to time, but that resentment has faded into nothingness. That resentment that has left me has left an empty hole in my chest but, someday, that hole will fill with a beautiful, pure feeling of forgiveness and peace. Time is what I need to find that peace and forgiveness and, slowly but surely, I'm beginning to find what I'm looking for. One day, I'll be whole again. My pattern will be flawed but flaws are what make a person special and unique. I just want to let you know that I'm close to forgiveness and that, someday, I will share that feeling with you.
Yours,
Jen
(A/N: This is a fiction/non-fiction piece. I wasn't sure where to place this particular piece so I put it here!)
Dear Stranger,
Gosh, it's been a long time since I last wrote you a letter. I just wanted you to know that I haven't forgotten you and that my last letter to you was written in sorrow and in grief, remembering all of the words that have been said and the things that have been done. I remembered that you told me that I was dead to you and that I didn't love you. The only things that I felt that fateful day (on my thirteenth birthday--a day that I will never forget) was anger, hatred, and sorrow. I was angry because I loved you and you said something that wasn't true. I hated you for saying those words when I needed you the most as I transitioned from child to teen and from one environment to another. I needed my mom but you refused to be that for me...thus, my sorrow was born. The sorrow I felt at being cast aside like nothing more than a useless piece of garbage. There are nights, yet, almost twelve years later, that I long to call you mommy, despite my age. My dreams of you haunt me as they tease me with your motherly presence, only to be ripped away when the dawn of a new days arrives. That empty and hollow feeling that I get when I return to reality, trying to grasp onto the beautiful and good things--as few and far between those might have been--that I experienced growing up.
Today, I write this letter as a form of closure, a form of peace, and a form of forgiveness. I admit that I still resent you from time to time, but that resentment has faded into nothingness. That resentment that has left me has left an empty hole in my chest but, someday, that hole will fill with a beautiful, pure feeling of forgiveness and peace. Time is what I need to find that peace and forgiveness and, slowly but surely, I'm beginning to find what I'm looking for. One day, I'll be whole again. My pattern will be flawed but flaws are what make a person special and unique. I just want to let you know that I'm close to forgiveness and that, someday, I will share that feeling with you.
Yours,
Jen