Castle Crashers is one of those odd games that comes along every so often that you absolutely love, and yet love to hate. I go back and I play it often, but only for short bursts of time, because while it makes me very happy with what it does right, it makes me very angry with what I believe it does wrong.

We'll try going with the good/bad/good routine. What works for this game is hard to describe, because it is not just one thing that stands out, it is the overall cohesiveness of the game. The combat mechanics, a side-scrolling beat-em-up pulled straight out of the old school quarter arcades, is responsive and most importantly fun. The story is wonderfully silly. Not just funny, it is absolutely insane, gut-wrenchingly funny. There are not many games that actually make me laugh out loud, but this was certainly one of them, whether it is little characters doing crazy stuff in the background, or the insanely funny (and difficult) bosses, or lots and lots of bathroom humor. Also, the idea of a consistent character throughout your game, leveling up your abilities and finding new tools (some more useful than others) is a welcome change to the standard beat-em-up formula, in which your character really doesn't change throughout the game. These gradual changes give a great sense of progression throughout the game; you really feel like you are going somewhere in this game. Revisiting earlier levels with your suped up characters and absolutely destroying the enemies that once gave you difficulties is oh-so-satisfying. The magic system, when I first used it, seemed to be useless and pitifully weak, but when you put skill points into it it quickly becomes the go-to attack most of the time.

But it is these incredible assets that also prove to be some of the game's greatest downfalls. Remember those tools I was talking about? Most of them are wonderful additions to the game. The bombs allow for room clearing explosions, the sandwich is... well... monstrous, and everyone needs health potions every so often. But the other tools? The bow? Easily replaced with magic. While it is useful early on when your long range magic attacks are as powerful as Luke Skywalker when he first fights Darth Vader, once you put just a few points into your magic ability, the bow quickly becomes obsolete, yet you still have to waste time cycling through it searching for what you really need (sandwich). Additionally, the shovel. I'm sorry, Mr. Programmer who designed the shovel, because I am sure that no one really used that shovel, and here he put all that work into programming it to make just the right shovel sound at just the right time. But it serves no real purpose. It can dig up food, only if used in the right place. And in this fast paced game, you really don't have a lot of time or desire to sit there with a shovel and dig through the ground when you could be spending that time cutting through goblins/knights/wizards/fuzzies. Also, there are an absolute ton of characters to unlock in this game, along with a ton of weapons to use. And while the characters are wonderful to see, it takes an exorbitant amount of time (usually a full playthrough) to unlock one new character. So, despite there being a ton of creative characters, most players will not see many of them because it is simply too much to do to unlock them all.

And then there's the ending. Throughout the game, the characters you control are attempting to rescue four princesses. Very classic side-scrolling territory there. At the end of each section, you rescue one princess (and a very fun mini-game ensues in which the surviving players fight for the obligatory kiss). This was great; there were occasional rewards for getting through various parts of the game. It kept me coming back, to get to that next princess, to see that new location, that new boss. But then, once everything is done, you've conquered every boss, surmounted every obstacle, and you are expecting to receive the "ultimate" reward. Not that, you dirty little bugger! Just satisfaction. Closure. Such a long, difficult journey (and it is delightfully long and difficult) deserves a similar reward. But the ending of this game... I cannot spoil anything based on principle, but suffice to say I not only felt let down, I felt insulted. The ending of this game, instead of even being remotely considered to be a reward, made me feel like the time I had just invested was a joke. Basically, this game is the biggest RickRoll in history. It makes me rage so hard whenever I go back to play it, because with every fun level I beat, I know I am inching ever closer to that ending. Just thinking about it makes me as mad as people who maintain the Han Solo shot first.

And yet I keep coming back! Why? Why do I continue to torture myself? Because, truth be told, it's not really torture. Think about the things I counted against this game. The useless tools. The excessive amount of characters. The ending. All of these are actually easily avoidable. I simply just don't pay attention to the shovel. I am content in my next unlockable character, not all the unlockable characters. I simply through the Xbox through the window during the ending sequence. All of these so called problems are easily overshadowed by what works, and what works is a solid game built around a solid concept that not only succeeds at being a fun to play slash-em up but also is hilarious to play, especially if you play with friends. And perhaps there are players out there who are masters with the shovel and bow. If you are, I salute you, because you are most certainly a more understanding player than I.  Or maybe you are just a glutton for punishment. But then again, I review video games. And I continue to play this game. Maybe I am too. Let's start a club.

You really got upset about the ending? There was really no story to the game at all, and the ending was just silly. I think it fit the game perfectly. Even though I didn't really laugh that much during this game, I did smile a decent bit. And the ending was one of the things that made me smile.

The rest of your review I either liked or didn't remember. I haven't played the game in a long time, so I don't remember too much about the little things anymore.

Well, it wasn't so much that it didn't fit the game, because you are right, it did. But as a reward for finishing the game? It wasn't rewarding for me, it didn't give me a feeling of accomplishment, which I feel an ending, by definition, must give.