I'm just curious how many agree with me on this, and why you do or do not agree.


I do not believe in "Soul mates". And by that term, I mean the idea there are people you are "meant to be with". I believe that falling in love (real love, not crushes/infatuation) is a decision, be it conscious or sub conscious. For example: Say you meet someone and befriend them. After awhile you share secrets, fears, dreams. Those are choices to open up your heart to them. Next you decide to hang out often. You decide to talk to them when you're going through tough times. You decide to embrace your attraction to them. etc. After awhile you realize "I'm in love with them!" (it doesn't have to happen this exact way). I believe anyone can love or be loved. I believe I could have fallen for any girl I chose to let myself fall for (thank God I waited and chose the most perfect girl in the universe).

Reasons I do not believe in a destined love or "Soul mate" are, number one: we have freedom of choice. We are not destined to do anything. One of my favorite quotes I often use is "Fate and destiny are words that we use to make ourselves feel better about where our lives are".
Second : it seems unfair. What if the person you were made for (and vice versa) chooses not to be with you? Is it Just too bad for you? I am not intending to attack this belief, and I apologize if I come across that way. I am simply asking questions and stating opinions.

This vid sums it up:

No I do not believe in soul mates! I  just don't see the logic's behind it! How could someone be made perfectly for you and when y'all meet your gonna fall head over heels in love! Noo Noo! You meet someone and then you go on dates and gradually spend time together getting to know each other and see if you are compabtilbe enough to have a relationship and take it from there! Because no one is perfect so hell there could not be a person out there made specifically for you! That is why we have so many divorces and separations today! Becuz plp just jump into relationships and don't spend time to get to know their partners!

Deidrae Richards : I couldn't agree more. People fall in love with this romanticized version of love, that depicts a one special person is out there for everyone, and that marriage will be perfect and we'll all live happily ever after. Love requires alot of comprimise, and selflessness, so no it isn't always gratifying. And to assume there were soul mates, you have to assume that no one gets married to the wrong person, otherwise you have people left alone because their soul mate goofed.

once in while i do believe in soul mates but im not 100 % sure yet .

I do. It was love at first sight and our love has lasted since September 2006. We have our ups and downs, but we are otherwise "made for each other"

I do not believe in soul mates, don't get me wrong, I'm romantic as much as the next girl, but having just one person out there for you doesn't make sense. As mentioned above, we have free choice and our decisions and our actions create and break relationships. 

I believe we control our own destiny and we wind up with someone who works for us (usually).  I do not believe in soul mates.  I love my wife but to be with her in lives from here on out FOREVER.... seems like a bit much.  Instead, I'm just going to enjoy my time with her and when someone else shows up, I'll enjoy my time with them.

If we had soul mates, why is the divorce rate so high in certain industrialized nations?  Why do people die and remarry.  Why do people break up and be with others?

I don't buy it.

I would be telling a lie if I said I didn't used to believe in soul mates. But, after some rather rocky relationships that spawned off of this belief, I no longer think that way. If we meet someone and are meant to be with them, then that's just how it happens. I no longer believe that there is someone out there destined to be with me. I am in a relationship now, yes we have a lot in common, and the connection between us although sometimes shaky, remains strong. I would never class her as my soul mate, more of someone I care about a lot and share a good connection. So yeah, I don't believe in soul mates.

I don't believe in soul mates but I do think there is some one out there for every individual on earth, and when you meet that some one you will fall in love with them and die old together.

Not really. Your soul is yours, change it when you want. Not everyone matches up with someone perfectly. 

i dont think that the term "made for each other" really fits. its more like "works well together" or something. but yeah i think its a yes. the Greeks actually have a myth that when humans were created, we originally had two faces, four arms, and four legs. but Zeus feared our strength so he divided us in half, condemming us to search for the other half

ender44 :  

That's a good explanation of why even believing in the idea of a Sould Mate is not one I like to share. There are a select few who hold tight to that  idea, who use a small star-shaped net to catch their star fish-in-the-sea.. and for that rare few who catch that fish, that's great. But that is a rare few who are successful, and those with the same net may never get off the fishing boat until they decide that fishing just isn't for them. And that's saddening.

I do not believe in "Soul Mates".
I believe in Lost Souls that happen to come across a compass that leads them into the same direction and eventually they cross paths.
When they do cross paths?
Every now and again it feels like they are home.
Wish I had better words to describe the moment and the matter.
For those who have no understanding?
I do not believe in fate.
I think everyone has a list of good dance partners for the song of life.
Some fit.
Others grind.
And some just wreck a good occasion.


The best way I can phrase the subject matter.
Don't care if you don't get it.

Good Luck To All.
Peace.

I don't believe in the concept of soul mates. I do however, feel that some people are highly compatibile with one another.

On that note: Being in a committed relationship isn't a passive event that happens to you- You and your partner must CHOOSE to be devoted and to put effort into maintaining trust, communication, and so on. Your initial attraction to someone might be involuntary, but devoting yourself to someone is a choice you have to make together.

Well, no,to be honest. I think that two peoples' personalities can complement each other, maybe to the point where they're "perfect" for one another. I don't really think that fate has someone out there that you're destined to be with, but there could be someone out there who can make you feel amazing, and loved, but in my personal opinion, there's no perfect relationship.

I kind of used to when I was younger. After getting dumped by yet another one I sort of came cynical on the subject.

There was though one on and off girlfriend that I think I never stopped loving and for her reasons not to stay with me were always obscure in the lines of "oh you are too good for me, it would not just work out, but I will always love you".

Looking back I think she was right. It would have never worked out but I loved her nonetheless. She died some years ago after a surgery and I had not seen her in a year. She called me maybe under a month before that and I did not learn of her death until one month later after she had actually passed away. She told me: "Always remember you are very dear to me."

Sometimes I think maybe she was my actual soul mate. We could not have ever shared our lives together and it was her time to go, but what little we had, I am happy I was there for her. (Sleep well my love.Rakastan sinua aina.)