I'm unaware of the rules for something like this, as I have checked what was available in this forum. If it's too inappropriate, then I understand if it gets trashed.

As a retro gaming collector, I often search several charity shops and car boot sales to find the classics of yesteryear. It might be a tad more expensive than going on E-bay, but I feel it is better searching high and low for these lost treasures in as many places as you can. It adds to the thrill of collecting, you see?



I am a big NES collector, and although my collection is lax in some form, it is slowly growing. So today, I struck some gold, or at least, some fools gold. I was in a charity shop, not expecting to find anything (Nintendo World Championship where is you? ) when I saw a grey plastic box. I instantly though NES cart and pulled it out, and as much to my enjoyment, it was the faithful Pac-man game. However, the label was poorly torn off, with only the letters “Pac-m” showing. Also, the orange ghost known as “Clyde”, seemed to survive on the sticker. The cart also had a few chips and cracks in it. I was appalled by the quality of such a game. I wondered if I could get it cheap…



I took it to the counter and asked for the price, and the retailer just stood there. He didn’t recall ever getting that game as a donation. Another one walked by and the retailer I was talking to asked where it came from. She said it just appeared there this morning, on the counter when she came in to open the shop. I pointed out the poor condition of the cart, and a charity shop being a charity shop, they let me have it for £0.99. If anything, I might be able to refurbish it somewhat…



So I made it home to test out the game. The game came up in its classical title screen, and I decided to wait and see the names of the ghosts, because I needed refreshing on that matter. The first three ghosts, Blinky, Pinky and Inky came up normally, but something strange happened for Clyde. When he came up, he had red eyes, and his text slowly typed up under the names section as “They will all pay”. Normally, as I have researched, there is an animation of Pac-man being chased by the four ghosts, but he eats them up when they turn blue. That wasn’t there at all.



A little baffled, I took out the cart and puffed air into it to get rid of dust. It normally does the trick. I popped it in again and waited to see what it came up as. Blinky and Pinky were normal, however, Inky wasn’t there at all, with it’s “character” and “nickname” filled up with the word “DEAD” in block capitals. When Clyde came up, his eyes were still red, spotted with pixels of blood over him. This time, the letters typed up slowly: “Everyone hates me…”



At this point I took it out, and decided to clean the connection pins. With much cleaning, I found there was a fair bit of dirt in there. I cleaned it again just to be sure and with a careful eye, the pins were shiny and sparkly, just like new. I put in the game in and saw what happened next. Blinky was alright, but Pinky and Inky were not there this time, with both name spaces taken up with “DEAD” like before. Clyde looked the same, but covered in more blood. More letters slowly typed up: “255 is where it all ends…” I just stared at the screen, seeing what would happen next.



After a while, static could be heard faintly, and the graphics glitched-up. The static would get louder and louder, playing in proportion of the scrambled graphics. I was about turn off the NES system and try jiggling around the cart around to see if that helped, but then the “start of the level” music played in a distorted tone. After that had finished, the level snapped into view. The walls were speckled with blood on every wall, and Inky and Pinky were horribly deformed outside the maze, with the normal music of the game being demonically distorted. There were no pellets of any kind. Only Blinky was inside the centre of the maze. I was able to move around freely in the maze.



Blinky moved out and started to roam the maze in a random pattern. Every now and then, there would be some static, and Clyde would appear out of no-where for a second next to Blinky, before disappearing again. After this had happened about four times, actual static started to appear, slowly engulfing the entire screen. A high pitched note would signal when the entire screen was static. The static faded, showing Blinky in a horribly maimed position next to Inky and Pinky, fresh blood seemed to pool around them. Pac-man seemed to be perfectly fine, when the screen glitched-up again, as well as the music. A huge picture of Clyde popped up, covered in blood and red eyes, with the words “The maze is broken. I am free.”. After about a minute, the screen snapped back to the level, showing the infamous split screen level. There were no ghosts, no pellets, and only Pac-man. The music seemed normal now, and the walls seemed blood free.



I could move freely, but after a short while, static popped up for a second and Clyde was there. Static popped up again briefly and he wasn’t anymore. This happened time and again, each time he loomed closer and closer. Every flick of static the walls became bloodier and Clyde was covered in more and more blood. Then he stayed on the screen, and started to follow Pac-man, leaving a trail of blood as he moved. I decided to evade him, but he kept moving faster and faster. I went through the little tunnel to slow him down, but Clyde was not affected by this. It got to a point where Clyde was too fast, and caught Pac-man. The entire screen flashed like you completed a level, there was an even higher pitched tone, and Clyde savagely tore Pac-man into two pieces, with blood splattering everywhere.



The same picture of Clyde popped up, but with different words: “Everyone who hates me will die…” It was at this point I turned off the power, took the game out of the NES system, and threw it against a wall out of spite. A small chip flew off it in a satisfying manner as it collided with the wall. I took the game up, and I threw the game away in the bin.



The next morning was bin day, and I proceeded to take the bins out as I normally would. However, the bin I threw away the NES game in didn’t have the NES game in it. It was missing. I was concerned it was missing, but also delighted that it wasn’t there anymore. After taking the bins out, I decided to try my luck again at another charity shop, taking what I had learned into account. In a different charity shop I found an NES game. So I pulled it out, expecting something nice, only to find the exact same Pac-man game, with every crack, chip and tear in it when he threw it away. I asked who donated this game, and they only replied:



“No-one, it was there this morning on the counter.”