I was going to wait another 5 days to make this post so that the 2 milestones could fall on the same date but I'm itching to post and don't want to wait any longer.

I've never really shared much about myself except in my newbie forum thread. I'm a 37 year old father of 4 awesome kids - Dylan 11, Holly 7, Scott 5, and Lilly 4. I've put my kids through a lot in their young lives because I'm a recovering substance abuser. I say "substance abuser" because that covers a wide range of addictive substances that I won't take the time to list. However, I will say that any person here would be hard pressed to name a drug, either legal or illegal, that I haven't tried or been addicted to at various times in my life. The good news is that I have been sober since August 2012.

I'm separated from my wife who has her own set of issues to deal with and we signed over temporary custody of our kids to my parents in August 2012 while I was in an in-patient drug and alcohol treatment facility. Every day I feel more and more like my old self, which would be similar to a version of me that existed sometime before 1994 or in brief moments of lucidity. In my first year of sobriety there was a lot of what doctors call "Post Acute Withdrawl Syndrome" and it manifested as an extreme form of depression and anti-social behavior. Some evidence of these things can be found in my posts and threads all around the board but for the most part I think I was able to remain civil when it really mattered because I only managed to get trust points removed once and knew when to ignore certain users.

Being a part of this community has meant a great deal to me even if I'm not always as sociable as I'd like to be (I'm working on it). Becoming trusted was a HUGE accomplishment for me because I had lost so much of that trust in my actual day to day life. Making friends was also a pleasantly unique feeling for me.

tgags123 : was one of the first friends that I made here because at the time his profile said he was older than he is and I thought "Here's another guy in his thirties that posts alot, likes to have fun and can take a joke" Later, I discovered he was slightly younger than I thought he was but that doesn't change the fact that he's a great friend to have. He's also a charter member of "the future four"

kramer4077 : was another of my original friends. When I met her she had such a tenacity for contribution to the site that inspired me.

Mistress : was also one of my first friends and is another member of "the future four" and is quite possible the most organized and informed member of this site. We don't talk much anymore but I'm sure that's cause I can be slightly aloof.

goodboy : The last of "the future four". He's probably on a secret mission or is in witness protection but he has and will be missed.

Singelli : I couldn't have a list of friend summons without including her. There were days during the last year that I only got out of bed to talk with you. Wherever this life takes me, whatever happens in the end, you will always be in my heart.

Brigand : Some people branded this guy a troll - I always thought he might have been one of the funnest people here. I hope you're not gone for good, man.

mrfe : I think you must be the happiest person that I know.

There were also people along the way that, based on their posts, I have a deep respect for.

warmaker : I have rule about posting in serious threads (sometimes I break it) but one thing I've noticed is that if someone needs advice or encouragement and you've replied to them, the thread can probably be closed. There seems to be a wisdom to your posts that no one can equal.

legacyme3 : You tell it like it is with a sort of dry and sometimes harsh tone. I respect that.

zanderlex : In the past I have questioned your motives but there is no denying that you have a drive unequaled by most every other user on Vizzed.

tRIUNE : I've read certain cryptic posts where you mention your past. I've always thought of you as a role model. Like someone who made it out of their young life and is now truly alive. (and you're a hard worker)

I hope none of you minds that I summoned you and I would have summoned more but the more people that I call out the more I feel that some might be put off that I didn't summon them. Basically, if you're reading this and I didn't summon you, you should know that I value you because you make my experience in this place so much more rewarding. Thanks for a great year and thanks for helping me feel like I belong somewhere.

I feel as though somehow this post is not complete or thorough enough but I also get a feeling that I've shared too much as it is. This is a pretty common feeling for me so I'm not gonna obsess over it any further and just hit submit.

Ah, the "future four." I remember mistakenly calling us "furniture four" when I was talking to Singelli once.

I can't believe it's already (or well, almost) a year. But you know, even though we don't talk to each other much or anything, I always feel like we had this silent understanding of each other. And I very much like that.

Hey phantom, we all make mistakes and learn from it; sometimes making the same mistakes more than once to finally understand it. That's what I think makes life to beautiful. But what makes it even more beautiful is when you have something worthwhile, like this double accomplishment, to look up on. Congratulations!

I wish I had more to say, but I'm not much of a talker myself. However, I will say this: I'm happy for you.

thephantombrain : Thank you for the mention in your post.  I didn't know a lot of that about you and thank you for being brave enough to share your story with us. When I first signed up for this site over a year ago it was as a distraction from a bad break-up and a week after I signed up I met the most incredible man who is my boyfriend now.  It's almost like this site provides shelter from the elements of real-life that are hard to face.  I am glad it can be so many things for so many people.  I feel closer to some of the people here than people in my own family. I am glad we both found the site about a year ago and I am glad to have met you and inspired you

P.S. I LOLed at the tgags bit, I remember when his profile name was green like he was an older member!  Don't worry, I really am my age 32, so I am one of the older people

Congratulations! 1000 posts in a year is pretty impressive. Keep up the amazing posting, helping, and layout creating!

Yay! First summon AND longest story. *Silently dances*

I'm glad you feel comfortable enough to share with us.  The ones who care and consider your feelings and your experiences will take the time to read.  The rest of the... ahem... children... will probably blast through the post, not see Pokemon references, and keep things moving.

The joy of youth, huh?

1,00 posts?  Whatever.

Congratz on your sobriety.  I have never dealt with addiction but I have tried simple challenges like, "No beer for 30 days" or "Do X for 30 days" and that's challenging enough.  I could never imagine dealing with something on a whole different level how you have.  It's extremely impressive and a wonderful goal.  I understand you have to struggle every day and work at it and there's no such thing as being free and clear.  
Keep working hard, man.  I have a kid so I know how they impact your life.  Keep them in mind when you make your choices.  I'm sure you'll always make good ones from here on out.

This was everything I needed to make my day complete.  *sniffles * I love you too... I don't know what else to say since I have to write 100ish pages before 2pm tomorrow.  *hugs * But I just had, had, had to say I love you.  I'm glad I stopped by today.

Mistress : I got a big kick out of hearing about the "Furniture Four". The term the future four always reminded me of the fantastic four. Now I can't help but think of us as a group of super furniture. If I'm the recliner, and you're the coffee table then that must make goodboy the hide-a-bed and I'm not sure what tgags is...lol.

And yes, it's a silent understanding. Shhh

kramer4077 : I completely agree with that shelter part. There were times when I was so down that the only distraction I could find was stalking Davideo7 or playing Mario hacks. I'm glad you found someone incredible.

PacmanandMariofan : Thanks for the warm words. You've always seemed very thoughtful and you make some really fun layouts.

tgags123 : I had tried sobriety before for brief stints but it has been a completely different monster this time. Imagine touching a hot surface several times and each time only getting a mildly uncomfortable sensation. Then the last time you touch it your skin swells, blackens and begins to fester. That's what it has been like.

I've had fun with you too.

warmaker : The joy of youth indeed. It all started out so harmless and I had no clue about genetic predisposition or coping mechanisms. You're right though, the kids help keep me grounded.

Singelli : I hope your 100ish pages are going well. Once I found out about the timetable for the first nine weeks I figured you wouldn't be around too much. Love you too.

Congrats man, 1000 posts and almost 1 year is impressive. I never knew that you are part of the Future Four or that you have been sober for a long time, it sounds like life on- and outside Vizzed is getting better and better. You always make nice and thoughtful posts and I like your layouts as well, even that you put your name in your current layout with Egyptian hieroglyphs

Wow, I never knew any of that about you man, but I guess we never talk so how could I. But it's inspiring that you've been sober for nearly 2 years, keep up the good work man and congrats on your almost first year and 1000 posts.

juuldude : Thanks man! It's cool that you noticed my Egyptian cartouche for thephantombrain. It was a fun little project for me to do. It was also interesting for me to learn that hieroglyphic names are written without the use of vowels.

zeross121 : That's kind of one of those little personality quirks that I'm trying to work through - I either feel like I haven't said enough or I've said too much. I'm hoping to find a middle ground at some point. Thanks for replying here!

It's always nice to see someone grab the first brass ring of 1000 posts, so I give you a congratulations for that, and almost hitting it on your 1 year anniversary. Good luck on getting the next few milestones.

I'm sure that I've posted non-cryptic stuff as well about my past when I first signed up here. I'm not trying to be cryptic though, I was living a criminal lifestyle up until I was 19, was also doing all sorts of drugs on a daily basis. I'm glad that life is way behind me thanks to Christ.

If you're saying I've had some impact on your sobriety then glad to here it. Also congrats on that!

pacman1755 : Thanks for wishing me luck. It means a lot coming from a heavy poster like yourself.

tRIUNE : You and everyone that frequents this place have been a part of my sobriety. Your posts had indicated to me that you had left an old lifestyle behind in pursuit of change and Christ. It's been inspirational to me and I've tried to do something similar. Thanks again.