So let's say an idiot is in the market for a laptop. This idiot knows what he'd like said laptop to have, but isn't sure what company or what model to get.

Said idiot wants these things:
-HDMI port
-Sd port
-Usb ports (obviously)
-Good battery life
-Decent ram
-Decent graphics card
-Decent such and such

Would any of you fine folks happen to have a suggestion?

(If this doesn't belong here please forgive me)

I don't know what laptop to suggest (perhaps go for Alienware since my cousin always brags having best gaming proformance, which I don't care as long the game works fine on mine).

Hm.. I didn't know Toshiba had bad battery life. I'd get alien ware, but I don't have that kind of money XD

I know you want a laptop desperately, so I suggest getting a lenovo Yoga 2-in-1 laptop. 

If you don't like that one, I'd probably suggest one of those touchscreen laptops that support Windows 8.

kidcop : How much money are you willing to spend? It is rather difficult to make a recommendation if you do not have a price range. There are many laptops out there with varying capabilities and prices. 

Windows 8 seems more trouble some then anything. Yoga, huh? Seems interesting enough.

sop281 : I'd say I'm willing to spend about $400- $500. I'm 14 thus, not employed, so getting that much should be hard enough.

kidcop : Windows 8 is not as bad as you think, right now it's the only thing I use, whetehr it's for comoputer or phone, it's wonderful for me. As for a computer, I don't know much about specifications, but I would personally go for either a Dell or a Lenovo.
I have both, the Dell is an Inspiron WIndows 8 Touchscreen and it's amazing.

I would suggest a ASUS K53E-BBR7 Notebook,
Specs:
General
Color-Matte Brown Suit
Operating System-Windows 7 Home Premium 64-Bit
CPU Type-Intel Core i3-2310M 2.1GHz
Screen-15.6"
Memory Size-4GB DDR3
Hard Disk-640GB
Communication-Gigabyte LAN and WLAN
Dimensions-14.88" x 9.96" x 1.37"
Weight-5.73 lbs.
Other Features-Facial Recognition
Display-
Screen Size
15.6"
Wide Screen Support-
Yes
Resolution-
1366 x 768
Hard Drive-640GB
HDD RPM-5400RPM
Memory-4GB
Memory Speed-DDR3
Max Memory Supported-8GB
Optical Drive Type-SuperMulti DVDRW Drive
Communications-LAN
10/100/1000Mbps
WLAN-802.11n Wireless LAN
WiDi Capable
Ports
USB-3
Video Port-1 x VGA
HDMI-1 x HDMI
Audio Ports-1 x Microphone Jack, 1 x Headphone Jack
Audio
Built-in Wide 16:9 Touchpad
Keyboard-348mm Chiclet style keyboard
Card Reader-SD+MMC+MS+MS PRO SDHC(SD 2.0)
Webcam-0.3MP
Power-Battery-6-cell lithium ion
Battery Life-5 hours and 47 minutes
Physical Specifications
Dimensions
14.88" x 9.96" x 1.37"
Weight
5.73 lbs.
Very great and powerful laptop that can handle a ton of programs at once.

I have an old laptop from like 2004 that runs Windows XP. And I absolutely love it. I don't know if it is possible to get one still, but if you can get a laptop that still has Windows XP I highly recommend getting it. XP is my favorite operating system by far. If you can't, just get anything other than a Mac. Apple products suck and are way overpriced.

I don't know if you still are trying to figure this out, but my big suggestion is to also order your description of specs in your first post from the most important to the least important. Sometimes if you are running on a budget, it's better to get most of what you want in your ideal laptop rather than isolating it to make sure a laptop has all the desires that you need. From what you are suggesting, companies like Toshiba, HP, and ASUS are able to offer most of those needs without breaking your budget. But, it really depends on what you mean by "good battery life" and "decent graphics card", because I have a toshiba at around 600 dollars and it's incredible on both of those descriptions in my point of view, and the big reason for it is because I don't really put disk space to be that high up on my list of requirements, so I was able to get a cheaper model with the rest of the specs to be what I hoped for.

Thanks everyone!

tiber1976 :   I'll check it out The model for me is hard to find so far.

tgags123 : My brother is able to get me nearly any operating system on any computer, So I'll likely have XP With something else. I just don't want windows 8 as the base system.


play4fun : I'll try that next time I need something this specific.

I would have to agree with play. If you are still looking for a laptop, for what you are looking for, a brand new HP would be great. You can also build a custom laptop on Toshiba's website if you like Toshiba's...

Thanks for all of your help everyone.

My older brother ended up giving me a laptop! Someone had cracked the screen and had no use for it, so they gave it to him. He ,too, had little use for it because he already had a laptop.

Its a pretty decent laptop (a single core Acer Aspire).