My parents have never been supportive of my actions or successes. Recently I got a scholarship to the Stanford band and my mom is still telling me to quit playing trumpet.
 
Any one else have a similar dynamic in their family?

By support do you mean your parents encourage you to work hard in school to get a good education so you will get a good job one day if so yes they push me onwards everyday and I will never let them down.

My dad sure doesn't. His last words to me were "f*** you. Bye." He said it over the phone when I was about 13 years old.

My mom pretends to, but I would say not really. She had nothing positive to say when I said I was going to propose to my wife. She was silent most of my wedding. She didn't bother to call me on the day of my college graduation to say congratulations. Everything has to be about her. The list goes on.

lightningotter : First congratulations on getting your scholarship. It is a blessing and you should make the most of it. When I was a teenager my parents were separated. What made it rough was I was more or less put in the middle of what was going on with them. As a result I ended up making a lot of mistakes and as an adult now I really regret many of the mistakes I made. Sometimes it did feel like my parents were more focused on what was going on between them than what was going on with me. Although my parents eventually got back together I had ended up making a lot mistakes and ended up dropping out of school. I don’t blame my parents for that though. Any mistakes I made are my responsibility and fall on my shoulders.

I can relate though to how you’re feeling. I am a writer and have been one since I was a teenager even though I didn’t really embrace it as something I would eventually end up doing for my vocation until I left school. Although I love writing and often say that my ability to write was a gift from God, it can be one of the most difficult and frustrating ways to try and make a living.

It has been a struggle for several years and I still haven’t really achieved what I want to but I look at the ups, downs, and sideways that a writer has to go through as part of the growing process and paying your dues. I know what it’s like to have family members act as though you’re wasting your time and not really seem supportive. Being a writer it is especially frustrating when people who have never been a writer assume that it is easy and assume you’re making a decent living. It can be and often is frustrating to try and explain to them the things that a writer has to go through. Especially when those same people think you can just walk into a magazine or a newspaper and demand money for your work. It simply doesn’t work that way.

It really is an endless practice of hard work and dedication. As far as my parents although they are frustrated with all the time and effort I put into my work and not getting paid, they are supportive and that is something I really appreciate. As for me I’m gradually starting to get noticed by the right people in my field and I hope that it will eventually lead to something.

Although it can be tough sometimes it’s important to not give up. My grandfather was a jazz musician and played the trumpet. I know it’s not an easy thing to do and it takes talent to play the trumpet or any musical instrument for that matter keep working at it. Believe me it will pay off in the long run.

As far as your question my advice is to just explain your position and keep working hard. I had to deal with family thinking that my writing wasn’t serious but once I started getting published in magazines they realized how serious I was about it and even though I’m still looking for my break they support me.

Congratulations on getting the opportunity to go to college. Best of luck to you.

It's too bad you don't have a parent who supports your love.  My folks would cheer me on and tell me to try anything I wanted.  They left me to my own devices when it came to jobs and work but they always helped me and supported me with sports, activities, and things I really enjoyed.  If I said, "oooh, I want to try that," they would say, "okay, go for it."  Of course, I would get to pay for a lot of the things I did and that made me decide whether or not I wanted to try new things.  

But my mom thinks I'm the golden child in the family and I can do no wrong.  She'd be happy to set me up with whatever I needed to be happy.

I'm lucky like that.  I won't ever complain.

My parents do support me here and there, it really depends on whats going on.

But mostly my mother does more than my father.

Both of them have since I couldn't stand pure and applied sciences (especially maths). It was hard for my father, who loves maths, but now he seems to be supportive (although at 30, it's not like he has such a direct influence)

My mom pretends to support me in my sports. But when i comes down to actually doing something for me so i can do a sport its all up to dad. 

Yes, my parents support me and they only try to do what is best for me. The come when I have a sporting event or when I get awards in school, they support me all the time. There are some times we disagree on little things, but for the most part they are my biggest supporters, they support me 100% and I would be a depressed person who wouldn't be motivated to do anything with my life if it weren't for my parent's motivation and always trying to push me to do well. So my parents are a huge part of my life and they will continue to be for the rest of my adult life and through high school and college.


rcarter2 : Wow that is terrible to hear, that really sucks when parents aren't there to be a part of the biggest moments of your life

My parents don't know a lot about my hobbies and things, or decisions I'm trying to muddle through until after the fact. It's probably because I don't have many hobbies or groundbreaking decisions, but I just don't talk about the things I'm into, really. I told my mom something Lazlo and I are working on recently and she laughed and said it sounded like a lot of fun and that it seemed like something we would do. But I don't really ask for support, and they don't really give it, necessarily.They have to warm up to it and usually I have to explain the situation or whatever it is for ages before they seem to get the jist of what I'm doing and why, and support me or acknowledge that it's happening or whatever.

My dad doesn't really seem particularly attached to things I need or do, he just gives me money or advice or whatever I need as I ask for it, which is nice. Even if he doesn't support what I'm doing in particular, he seems to always support me.

My mom gets weird and asks a lot of questions and doesn't always seem entirely keen on my ideas or thoughts. She tries to talk me out of a lot of things by guilt tripping me; I'll just come out and say "You don't really need to like it because it's happening, I just want you to not be a pain in the ass about it later." but she always needs to relentlessly harass me about what I'm doing until I'm distraught over it, then call under the guise of apologizing, only to lay into me again as soon as she's done saying sorry. It's a little better now that I'm a bit older, but there was a span of years in there that she had her fingers in everything I was doing and was just a real dork about it. It really just depends on if she agrees or not. So I guess it's somewhat conditional. But if she does support me or like whatever venture I'm on, she'll go all out to help and support me.

Whoa... I never knew parents wouldn't support their children before. For me, my parents always support me and help me. They encourage me to do good in school, encourage me to work hard, and they also obviously support me in terms of money too but they wouldn't allow me to just buy any game or anything I want unless I deserve it. 

It depends on what stage of my life it was when I had actual support.

When I earned the position of Editor in Chief for the high school paper my senior year, mom told me not to. I had spent the three years beforehand making it so I could become Editor in Chief. She said not to take it because I could be kicked out of the district at any moment because I didn't live in the district I went to school in (long story).

But she was the one that argued that I couldn't switch districts because of my involvement with the paper and the friends I had since middle school. When they moved a town over, I was 16 months from high school graduation.

Then when I got the chance to interview with the local newspaper for a 2k scholarship and an internship, she didn't want me to. Said it would be a waste to do it if I wasn't going to start uni the next fall, even though I did have the funding to do so (as I found out the next winter).

When I started my first job, she threw a fit when I opened my bank account. Said since I was just holiday help, it wasn't something I would stick with after the holidays. But, they kept me on and I'm still working there.

I started off with plenty of hours, since it was retail at Christmas, but my hours weren't steady, but they expected me to pay my "rent" for living in their house. I was happy to comply, but not when my checks were $120 every two weeks. We got into fights over money and how I can't save money if they can't.

It got to the point where I moved out last summer because I couldn't take the fighting. I moved in with a friend, then got myself back into school. We've made up and I'm living with her again this summer. It's nice, but I'm always worried something's going to happen and I can't live at home.

As for my dad, who missed all of this, he's supported me the best he can. Even though he won't say it to me, personally, I've been told he's proud that I've got myself in school, going for my bachelors. He was the one that told me I didn't have to pick up my own phone bill, or move out when I did.

But mom's better now. My first priority is school, even though she doesn't like how much debt it's causing. 

My mother and stepfather have supported me for a long time. They are always willing to help me out when I need it, and encourages me to do well for my future.

Well, not really, to be honest. Unfortunately, my mother passed away years ago and my father hasn't been too supportive of me.

During my teen years my parents supported me when I didn't even think they were ( I know from looking back and getting answers from them later on)...

I used to think my parents weren't at all supportive, but in fact, their 'supposed' lack of support actually was what built me into the person I am today at 29 years old.

Well, for me, Thankfully, my parents was always supportive and awesome! Sure they may yell at me at times or become a little harsh at punishment when I act up, but at the end, I still realize that my parents are always the best to me!

I guess they have been very good at giving me hard time and being supportive at the same time. Dad is basically this guy I sometimes call and ask how he does who also sometimes calls me and asks how I am doing and with who I have lunch with maybe twice a year. Mom still wants to kick my butt for my own good. I think dad gave that up when I turned 18.

My dad is supportive of me to a point. As long as i'm trying my best with all i'm doing and making headway in life he's fine with me. My mom on the other hand...well she's a handful of words I can't really use on here. She's totally against me in every way and always has been. From video games to my friends and so on. She's a very controlling person and very OCD with cleaning. I've had to put up with her screaming about me because MY ROOM isn't up to her standards. I'm glad I have my dad otherwise I don't think i'd be as successful and that he helps me not completely pull every strand of hair from my head in rage.