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07-24-16 09:03 PM
Fyredove is Offline
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Okay, Maybe someone can help me here with understanding.

Lately, I have gotten myself a nice, brand new computer. It's a pretty blue, large 17 in with a touch screen and windows 10. It's been forever since I've been on a computer, and I've been wanting to catch up on all the things I've been missing. Let me make a note that this came out of MY MONEY . Yep, all 400+ dollars came out of my own, personal account and was never in the hands of my parents (Except when they needed stuff and paid me back late on)

Okay so, I will be honest, I am a little addicted to being on my computer. And do end up being on it late into the night, but I normally stay up that long anyways.


My parents seem to be complaining on how long I've spent on my computer (Again, I will be honest, I am on it a lot). However, I feel that they have no grounds to be complaining. Why?

1. Everyday, and I'm not exaggerating, I do almost everything around the house. From the kitchen with making food and cleaning, to the animals when they need to be fed and given water. The only thing I do not do, is the laundry, that is my mothers job. And even then I've been helping her with folding clothes and putting them away. I clean up after myself as well, and I never put up a fuss over doing anything, I do it right away.

2. Both of them are sucked into their own devices nearly all day. While, yes, my father does deserve his own time after working the graveyard shift, but honestly cannot be a hypocrite because he does the same. While my mother, whom doesn't work, watches TV or is on her phone for whatever reason.

3. If I were to be off this computer, all I would be doing is watching TV. Which I know they wouldn't complain about that because before I even had this, I would be watching something. And how is that different if I am on my computer or if I'm watching a TV screen about 45 degrees to the left?

Might I also add that it has been since the summer of 8th grade that I haven't had a summer vacation because I was always working on high school credits. I mean,gosh forbid if I actually enjoy whatever break I have before I'm wisked off to college?

For anyone that may comment - They want you to go out and make friends/get a job, that is wrong. First off, they know that I have the sociability of a rock. And I've been home schooled since 4th grade, so they know I have no friends except for online ones. And since I need a drivers license to get a job (We live in the middle of nowhere, there is nothing within a 1-2 mile radius that is hiring, I've checked) and I only have a permit. So unless my father can magically pull some time out of somewhere to drive me 30 minutes to work and back out of all the doctors appointments and sleeping during the day, I won't be getting a job until I get my license.

Can someone tell me if I'm missing something? If there is something I'm doing wrong?
Okay, Maybe someone can help me here with understanding.

Lately, I have gotten myself a nice, brand new computer. It's a pretty blue, large 17 in with a touch screen and windows 10. It's been forever since I've been on a computer, and I've been wanting to catch up on all the things I've been missing. Let me make a note that this came out of MY MONEY . Yep, all 400+ dollars came out of my own, personal account and was never in the hands of my parents (Except when they needed stuff and paid me back late on)

Okay so, I will be honest, I am a little addicted to being on my computer. And do end up being on it late into the night, but I normally stay up that long anyways.


My parents seem to be complaining on how long I've spent on my computer (Again, I will be honest, I am on it a lot). However, I feel that they have no grounds to be complaining. Why?

1. Everyday, and I'm not exaggerating, I do almost everything around the house. From the kitchen with making food and cleaning, to the animals when they need to be fed and given water. The only thing I do not do, is the laundry, that is my mothers job. And even then I've been helping her with folding clothes and putting them away. I clean up after myself as well, and I never put up a fuss over doing anything, I do it right away.

2. Both of them are sucked into their own devices nearly all day. While, yes, my father does deserve his own time after working the graveyard shift, but honestly cannot be a hypocrite because he does the same. While my mother, whom doesn't work, watches TV or is on her phone for whatever reason.

3. If I were to be off this computer, all I would be doing is watching TV. Which I know they wouldn't complain about that because before I even had this, I would be watching something. And how is that different if I am on my computer or if I'm watching a TV screen about 45 degrees to the left?

Might I also add that it has been since the summer of 8th grade that I haven't had a summer vacation because I was always working on high school credits. I mean,gosh forbid if I actually enjoy whatever break I have before I'm wisked off to college?

For anyone that may comment - They want you to go out and make friends/get a job, that is wrong. First off, they know that I have the sociability of a rock. And I've been home schooled since 4th grade, so they know I have no friends except for online ones. And since I need a drivers license to get a job (We live in the middle of nowhere, there is nothing within a 1-2 mile radius that is hiring, I've checked) and I only have a permit. So unless my father can magically pull some time out of somewhere to drive me 30 minutes to work and back out of all the doctors appointments and sleeping during the day, I won't be getting a job until I get my license.

Can someone tell me if I'm missing something? If there is something I'm doing wrong?
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07-24-16 09:17 PM
Eirinn is Offline
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Well I mean I would never tell someone their parents are wrong, so please don't read my reply that way, but eh, this sort of thing is normal really. People tend to think it's bad to play games or use your phone or computer with all of your free time, but really those same people (as you pointed out) use their free time doing equally unproductive things. It's kind of like Gameranx pointed out: people claim video games "rot your brain" but those same people watch hours upon hours of television, and that the irony is that gaming and computer/phone usage are more stimulating to the brain (and for PC/phone usage, potentially more productive) than watching television as the latter leaves you sitting still doing nothing but staring for however long the program is. It's unhealthy mentally and physically.

So no, I don't personally think you're missing anything nor do I think you're doing anything bad by using your computer so much, especially not if you're not using any more time doing that than you would be if you were watching television or whatever you did before you got it.

I face the same situation with games etc. as so many people I know condemn the use of them, but I see it as a healthier alternative than sitting and staring at the walls or talking on the phone all the time.


I hope that made sense in some world. Lol
Well I mean I would never tell someone their parents are wrong, so please don't read my reply that way, but eh, this sort of thing is normal really. People tend to think it's bad to play games or use your phone or computer with all of your free time, but really those same people (as you pointed out) use their free time doing equally unproductive things. It's kind of like Gameranx pointed out: people claim video games "rot your brain" but those same people watch hours upon hours of television, and that the irony is that gaming and computer/phone usage are more stimulating to the brain (and for PC/phone usage, potentially more productive) than watching television as the latter leaves you sitting still doing nothing but staring for however long the program is. It's unhealthy mentally and physically.

So no, I don't personally think you're missing anything nor do I think you're doing anything bad by using your computer so much, especially not if you're not using any more time doing that than you would be if you were watching television or whatever you did before you got it.

I face the same situation with games etc. as so many people I know condemn the use of them, but I see it as a healthier alternative than sitting and staring at the walls or talking on the phone all the time.


I hope that made sense in some world. Lol
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(edited by Eirinn on 07-24-16 09:19 PM)     Post Rating: 2   Liked By: gamerforlifeforever, no 8120,

07-24-16 09:31 PM
Fyredove is Offline
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Eirinn : It did make sense. A lot of science-y stuff, but it made sense xD

And no no, I never go back on my parents. I never talk back. I don't aregue because 99.99% of the time, I'm proven wrong, so why bother?

It just annoys me how hypocritical it is. Just like a different conversation where my father yelled at

sonicthehedgehog57 :

For not being in/failed college, when he has stated to me previously that "College isnt for everyone". May I also add, that he had never attended himself. This may be to give me a better life, however, his morals in life might be different than mine. Happiness to me isnt money. While it's great to know that ill have the money for my next meal, but it isnt money. It isn't really knowledge either. While it may better me off... I just dont find it morally pleaseing to go off and learn something for 8 years just to get enough money to start my life, when whomever could've given me a happier life could've gone away. And i'll be there with money, but, I could be in some horrible abusive relationship (Which obviously, im not now, nor have I been in one, I'm just saying )


EDIT - Always an edit xP I forget things.

May I also add that they're pushing college onto me? That I havnt had a break in 3 years, and they want to me to do classes even though I cannot afford it nor can I drive anywhere? even with online classes, I've said numerous times I want to be in a physical college. They're also trying to push Buisness school on me when they know my passion is Zoology or to be hired as a DoP (Director of Photography)
Eirinn : It did make sense. A lot of science-y stuff, but it made sense xD

And no no, I never go back on my parents. I never talk back. I don't aregue because 99.99% of the time, I'm proven wrong, so why bother?

It just annoys me how hypocritical it is. Just like a different conversation where my father yelled at

sonicthehedgehog57 :

For not being in/failed college, when he has stated to me previously that "College isnt for everyone". May I also add, that he had never attended himself. This may be to give me a better life, however, his morals in life might be different than mine. Happiness to me isnt money. While it's great to know that ill have the money for my next meal, but it isnt money. It isn't really knowledge either. While it may better me off... I just dont find it morally pleaseing to go off and learn something for 8 years just to get enough money to start my life, when whomever could've given me a happier life could've gone away. And i'll be there with money, but, I could be in some horrible abusive relationship (Which obviously, im not now, nor have I been in one, I'm just saying )


EDIT - Always an edit xP I forget things.

May I also add that they're pushing college onto me? That I havnt had a break in 3 years, and they want to me to do classes even though I cannot afford it nor can I drive anywhere? even with online classes, I've said numerous times I want to be in a physical college. They're also trying to push Buisness school on me when they know my passion is Zoology or to be hired as a DoP (Director of Photography)
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(edited by Fyredove on 07-24-16 09:34 PM)     Post Rating: 3   Liked By: Eirinn, no 8120, sonicthehedgehog57,

07-24-16 11:11 PM
sonicthehedgehog57 is Offline
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Well I mean...it's true after all, some people just aren't fit for college or can't really handle it like others could/would. So they end up leaving after a year or possibly don't even try going. While I do think it's good to go off to college and do your best to manage/pass your way through...it's not "required" like so many people force you to believe. There are MANNNYYY people in this world that don't have a college degree yet are verrrryy successful and/or have created brilliant things/alternatives in comparison to people whom have worked 10+ years getting credentials and what not.

Money isn't everything you're correct, I'm just afraid if "I, myself" don't go or get at least some form of learning like that then I won't be able to find any work or source of income in my life. It's not everything but you do need it to sustain life and when families come into play...one income may not be enough it all depends. I don't wanna be a failure or have to push my issues on others because I can't support myself.

I know first hand that you don't really go against your parents...think let them go a little to hard upon you clouding your thoughts but that's not main point here. I know you don't as you may say: "well it doesn't make sense when am gonna do this? does it" and if they don't agree or say something you just let it go and do what say or something else they'd ask.

Like have said before too, online interactions and games have been proven to be helpful/good for you in comparison to many things that are considered "fine" by society.
Well I mean...it's true after all, some people just aren't fit for college or can't really handle it like others could/would. So they end up leaving after a year or possibly don't even try going. While I do think it's good to go off to college and do your best to manage/pass your way through...it's not "required" like so many people force you to believe. There are MANNNYYY people in this world that don't have a college degree yet are verrrryy successful and/or have created brilliant things/alternatives in comparison to people whom have worked 10+ years getting credentials and what not.

Money isn't everything you're correct, I'm just afraid if "I, myself" don't go or get at least some form of learning like that then I won't be able to find any work or source of income in my life. It's not everything but you do need it to sustain life and when families come into play...one income may not be enough it all depends. I don't wanna be a failure or have to push my issues on others because I can't support myself.

I know first hand that you don't really go against your parents...think let them go a little to hard upon you clouding your thoughts but that's not main point here. I know you don't as you may say: "well it doesn't make sense when am gonna do this? does it" and if they don't agree or say something you just let it go and do what say or something else they'd ask.

Like have said before too, online interactions and games have been proven to be helpful/good for you in comparison to many things that are considered "fine" by society.
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07-24-16 11:17 PM
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Fyredove : Hey, you just described my life.Are you phsycic? Or am I really not the only one of my kind: bound to my home/computer for all eternity?
Fyredove : Hey, you just described my life.Are you phsycic? Or am I really not the only one of my kind: bound to my home/computer for all eternity?
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07-24-16 11:47 PM
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Spidey243 : Why not both? xP
Spidey243 : Why not both? xP
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07-25-16 07:04 AM
Ghostbear1111 is Offline
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You're asking if you're missing something, and it seems like you are not missing anything from your point of view.

I'm a social butterfly, I like going out and doing things with other people and I get bored after 20 minutes of staring into a computer screen. I can't tell you what to do and I don't have any advice because it seems like you're not really open to suggestion anyway.

Do you want us to just agree with you? Let's be honest about what you're really posting for.

Anyway, if my parents complained about how I only did one thing all the time, I don't know what I would say. I've never been in that position. It seems like you're thinking about why you aren't doing anything else but have you thought about trying any other entertainment, such as reading a book or walking outside? I'm not telling you to do it but walking outside is free, reading is technically no extra cost with libraries and such. Maybe if you bug them enough to drive you around to libraries and other places so they can't do their own thing, they'll leave you alone?
You're asking if you're missing something, and it seems like you are not missing anything from your point of view.

I'm a social butterfly, I like going out and doing things with other people and I get bored after 20 minutes of staring into a computer screen. I can't tell you what to do and I don't have any advice because it seems like you're not really open to suggestion anyway.

Do you want us to just agree with you? Let's be honest about what you're really posting for.

Anyway, if my parents complained about how I only did one thing all the time, I don't know what I would say. I've never been in that position. It seems like you're thinking about why you aren't doing anything else but have you thought about trying any other entertainment, such as reading a book or walking outside? I'm not telling you to do it but walking outside is free, reading is technically no extra cost with libraries and such. Maybe if you bug them enough to drive you around to libraries and other places so they can't do their own thing, they'll leave you alone?
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07-25-16 10:50 AM
Fyredove is Offline
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Ghostbear1111 : Excuse me? I never asked anyone to agree with me. Heck, im looking for someone of disagree just so I can understand. I want people to disagree,

And why exactly would I not be open to suggestions?
Ghostbear1111 : Excuse me? I never asked anyone to agree with me. Heck, im looking for someone of disagree just so I can understand. I want people to disagree,

And why exactly would I not be open to suggestions?
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07-25-16 06:13 PM
Ghostbear1111 is Offline
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Fyredove : Look at the verbiage and word selection you have:

"I feel (my parents) have no grounds to be complaining."

Then you tell us how you can't make friends, you can't get a job, etc, etc.

That sure doesn't seem like, "Can someone give me some positive reinforcement here?"

It sounds like you're venting, complaining, and you're not actually looking for solutions. You shoot down everything before anyone can comment on it.

So, I'll leave it at that. I don't believe you want to understand.

In my post, I suggested going outside, reading books, and doing something other than looking at a screen.

Why not do those things? They won't have a negative impact on you and your parents might be pleased.
Fyredove : Look at the verbiage and word selection you have:

"I feel (my parents) have no grounds to be complaining."

Then you tell us how you can't make friends, you can't get a job, etc, etc.

That sure doesn't seem like, "Can someone give me some positive reinforcement here?"

It sounds like you're venting, complaining, and you're not actually looking for solutions. You shoot down everything before anyone can comment on it.

So, I'll leave it at that. I don't believe you want to understand.

In my post, I suggested going outside, reading books, and doing something other than looking at a screen.

Why not do those things? They won't have a negative impact on you and your parents might be pleased.
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07-25-16 06:45 PM
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Ghostbear1111 : You're right. I'm sorry sir.
Ghostbear1111 : You're right. I'm sorry sir.
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07-25-16 06:56 PM
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Fyredove : This is where you and I are missing it.

It is not about right and wrong. It's not "Look, I proved you wrong and I'm right."

I don't care about being right and I'm not trying to make you feel bad or show that you are somehow wrong.

It is your life. I respect that. You like your computer and you have a nice one provided to you by yourself. That's good. I'm impressed you have hundreds of dollars and you're not working. That's a good life skill.

What I am saying is there are things you can try outside of a work, friends, or a computer. You can even do both the computer and something at the same time. YouTube whittling and pick up a knife and a stick and see if you can create something. Your parents will see you doing something different and they might leave you alone.

The question is: Are you happy with what you're doing? If you are, keep doing it no matter what your parents say. They are trying to help from their standpoint but they are teaching you that electronics are fine, especially if your mother really is the way you're painting her to be.

Does that make sense? It's not me versus you. It's not me being right and you have to be wrong or anything like that.

It's your life. Do what makes you happy. It's that simple.

Go be happy.
Fyredove : This is where you and I are missing it.

It is not about right and wrong. It's not "Look, I proved you wrong and I'm right."

I don't care about being right and I'm not trying to make you feel bad or show that you are somehow wrong.

It is your life. I respect that. You like your computer and you have a nice one provided to you by yourself. That's good. I'm impressed you have hundreds of dollars and you're not working. That's a good life skill.

What I am saying is there are things you can try outside of a work, friends, or a computer. You can even do both the computer and something at the same time. YouTube whittling and pick up a knife and a stick and see if you can create something. Your parents will see you doing something different and they might leave you alone.

The question is: Are you happy with what you're doing? If you are, keep doing it no matter what your parents say. They are trying to help from their standpoint but they are teaching you that electronics are fine, especially if your mother really is the way you're painting her to be.

Does that make sense? It's not me versus you. It's not me being right and you have to be wrong or anything like that.

It's your life. Do what makes you happy. It's that simple.

Go be happy.
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07-25-16 08:58 PM
Oldschool777 is Offline
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It's called they think they are right and you are wrong. A story as old as time itself. Parents are like feminists sometimes,they do not know what they want.

Now they have points here which I will go into:

1. In exchange for chores,they feed you,shelter you,clothe you,and allow you to use the electricity to power the device. You do seem to do a lot of the housework and I commend you for it,but at the same time,it is somewhat expected.

2. They want you to be better than they are. They think if you stare at a screen all day,your mind will rot,you will be nearsighted,and forget to socialize.

3. Now I assume the TV watching is with the family,so it technically counts for bonding. I think that is their point.

4. It is good you are working on credits to make it seem like you want to better yourself in the eyes of a college admissions board.

5. Your parents screwed you up on the home schooling thing. I do not know the circumstances behind that,but if you are home schooled,that does cripple your social skills tremendously.

6. Can you not get your mother to teach you to drive,or do you guys only have 1 car? Also walking a mile or two is not that much for work. Hell,I used to have walk that for school. But they need to teach you how to drive,otherwise they will cripple you further.

In closing,you have not done anything wrong. But it is their job to nag at you and to irritate you. But they do it because they care in a demented sort of way,lol.
It's called they think they are right and you are wrong. A story as old as time itself. Parents are like feminists sometimes,they do not know what they want.

Now they have points here which I will go into:

1. In exchange for chores,they feed you,shelter you,clothe you,and allow you to use the electricity to power the device. You do seem to do a lot of the housework and I commend you for it,but at the same time,it is somewhat expected.

2. They want you to be better than they are. They think if you stare at a screen all day,your mind will rot,you will be nearsighted,and forget to socialize.

3. Now I assume the TV watching is with the family,so it technically counts for bonding. I think that is their point.

4. It is good you are working on credits to make it seem like you want to better yourself in the eyes of a college admissions board.

5. Your parents screwed you up on the home schooling thing. I do not know the circumstances behind that,but if you are home schooled,that does cripple your social skills tremendously.

6. Can you not get your mother to teach you to drive,or do you guys only have 1 car? Also walking a mile or two is not that much for work. Hell,I used to have walk that for school. But they need to teach you how to drive,otherwise they will cripple you further.

In closing,you have not done anything wrong. But it is their job to nag at you and to irritate you. But they do it because they care in a demented sort of way,lol.
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07-25-16 10:27 PM
Fyredove is Offline
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Oldschool777 : I just want to reply about #6

My mother lost her drivers license years ago due to Syncope. She has lost it a few years back, however, she still feels unconferable driving and since she has no license, by law, she wont be able to be in the car with me while I drive since I need someone 21+ with a license. We do have two cars, One being mine (Paid 3.5k for that sucker, but I love it xP)
Oldschool777 : I just want to reply about #6

My mother lost her drivers license years ago due to Syncope. She has lost it a few years back, however, she still feels unconferable driving and since she has no license, by law, she wont be able to be in the car with me while I drive since I need someone 21+ with a license. We do have two cars, One being mine (Paid 3.5k for that sucker, but I love it xP)
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07-25-16 10:34 PM
Oldschool777 is Offline
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That is why I brought it up. Do you have any other relatives or older friends that would let you practice driving with them?
That is why I brought it up. Do you have any other relatives or older friends that would let you practice driving with them?
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07-26-16 02:07 AM
Eniitan is Offline
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Ok....I've finally come to read this thread properly. First off all I can say is parents are parents they would do something of their own then complain about to their children about them being on the computer for a certain amount of time. Second as ghostbear suggests its good to do both in a way like try and find something to do and tackle outside of life. And see if you can get a family member to help you with your driving so it can get better. When parents see their children glued to the computer that's when they will worry, and doing what they are doing as of now. I mean I try my best not to be on the laptop for many hours. But, it depends on what I do in a day and how I do them as well. My mother doesn't complain as much now about what I do. Except for the fact I don't go to parties.....I don't mind parties its when it is held on Saturdays is what I don't like about them considering Sunday is the next day. So I rather go to one that is on a Friday see? So then I can have my nap in on sat, and wouldn't have to worry about anything. Since I go to church, and all on Sunday so I hope you understand a bit of where I am trying to say. I to am not so much sociable because I don't have nothing much new to tell or to about, and if I go out DO go out then I would have something new to talk about on what I did for that day, and all. Just balance things out, and you'll be good. Its always nice to go, and do other things from time to time than being on your computer too much.
Ok....I've finally come to read this thread properly. First off all I can say is parents are parents they would do something of their own then complain about to their children about them being on the computer for a certain amount of time. Second as ghostbear suggests its good to do both in a way like try and find something to do and tackle outside of life. And see if you can get a family member to help you with your driving so it can get better. When parents see their children glued to the computer that's when they will worry, and doing what they are doing as of now. I mean I try my best not to be on the laptop for many hours. But, it depends on what I do in a day and how I do them as well. My mother doesn't complain as much now about what I do. Except for the fact I don't go to parties.....I don't mind parties its when it is held on Saturdays is what I don't like about them considering Sunday is the next day. So I rather go to one that is on a Friday see? So then I can have my nap in on sat, and wouldn't have to worry about anything. Since I go to church, and all on Sunday so I hope you understand a bit of where I am trying to say. I to am not so much sociable because I don't have nothing much new to tell or to about, and if I go out DO go out then I would have something new to talk about on what I did for that day, and all. Just balance things out, and you'll be good. Its always nice to go, and do other things from time to time than being on your computer too much.
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07-26-16 06:30 PM
Ultrajeff is Offline
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My advice: move at your own pace, friend. Sure, your parents probably mean well, but you should get to accomplishing things when you're ready. Use your time wisely. Everything will work out in time. 
My advice: move at your own pace, friend. Sure, your parents probably mean well, but you should get to accomplishing things when you're ready. Use your time wisely. Everything will work out in time. 
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