This is a question I've thought about a lot, since I'm reaching 30 and there's not much to think about when you aren't playing video games, or writing scripts for youtube videos about playing video games. I remember I started critically thinking about this when I was like 14, and I still haven't reached a decision yet. My biggest fear isn't that they'll be disfigured or stupid or something, though that is obviously a concern. Mainly it's that you can do literally everything right. You can do everything that a parent can do for their child, and still end up with a kid that's a terrible person. That is a frightening prospect. Then there's the fact that signing on to raise a kid is signing off 18 years of your life just to get them out of the house, not to mention the financial drain. So many factors go into this, I'm surprised anyone has ever made the decision. 

The point is, how do you guys feel? Do those without kids want them? And what do those that have them have to say about it?

EDIT:

Geeogree: Sorry, didn't see this was in the geezer corner, my apologies.

I'm always faced with this question because I'm a guy who likes to think ahead and it still boggles me to a great extent. I feel that your career choices and your significant other will really affect having children and how many. I go between wanting to do NCAA wrestling and enlisting out of high school and one is a better option for having kids as the other is not. I grew up to a Air Force father and it was a lot of moving and while it taught me more social skills I don't think a parent would want that for their child. Whereas I could wait till I'm like mid thirties so I'll be close to retirement so I'll be in their life more. Regardless if you have a busy job like military, lawyer, doctor, ect. (even a teacher maybe) you will spend more time working than with your kids and family for that matter.

I always wanted to have kids growing up. I knew I was going to have them as long as I found someone I wanted to marry.

I now have 3 kids (all girls) and I think I'm done having kids.

I'm really glad I had kids even though they can be a challenge. I find that they have made me into a better person than I otherwise would have been.

I would love to have children, but there aint no woman  who has stuck around long enough for me to have any. Heck, that is how I was born for sure but I would love to have a family instead of just sticking to it and run instead of which is what my  own father did.

But sometímes I guess it is for the best. I am not a good person and the people who have had the wish to make babies with me would have made the worst mothers. I think I would rather not have a family than have a kid with some psycho junkie and see the kid maybe once in a month, if at all.

Totally neutral on it myself. If I have them I'll make sure to be the best father I'm able to be, if not I really don't care.

But then I'm a bit of an outlier in this respect. There's so much more to the world than having kids and raising a family, and while I don't judge or envy those that desperately want to have them I just have other priorities.

If I actually had a significant other that would likely skew my opinion a bit, but hey, don't know what's around the corner.

Symphonic : Stop ignoring my blatant hits on you then!

Seriously though. I love the thought of having a family I really do, Especially considering I pretty much yearn to be part of one. Due to mine being very mediocre... |(Couldn't find a word in my brain to explain, long story short no one in my family talks to each other)

As for kids.. Maybe if I find a lover that actively wants kids and I know that as a father I would be able to provide for them.. Like Symphonic though. It's more a case of if it happens, rather than wanting it to happen.. I mean I've got to find someone crazy enough to find me attractive first..

That being said.. I'd love to have kids.. It's just the thought of watching somebody grow up and to see what they become.. I'm weird like that.. 

As of now, it looks like I will not have children, at least not with my present husband - he just feels he does not have the energy to care for them. I am only 32 so at the moment it is a matter of fact I find a little sad. I would be rather strict on discipline (but "God" forbid I would hit them) but I believe I would be able to raise decent human beings who could think for themselves.

ender44: No! No! NO! I have never had any kids...I don't ever want any kids. I've had the wonderful privilege of being an uncle to two of my nieces. My sister has had me babysit them on way too many occasions, but I think that didn't make it any better for me to actually want any kids. Because of my two nieces, the thought has never even crossed my mind since the last time I babysat them, which I believe was about 5 or 6 years ago. They are now 13 and 11 years old and no longer need a babysitter. But watching them act the way they do, and climb all over furniture when you've told them multiple times not to...it just makes me think that I never, ever, EVER want any kids. Plus, they'll be WAY too expensive to have around. I love my life just the way it is right now. I don't want a child that'll possibly tear our wonderful relationship apart, like it has with a couple of my best friends and their high school sweethearts.

I've been married for a little more than 4 years now, and my wife and I have already had a looooooong talk about this on more than one (or two, or three) occasions. And the fact is, we're both absolutely fine with never having any kids. Well...we'll never plan on it anyways. If something were to happen...I mean, we'll be prepared if by some situation my wife gets pregnant. We've also talked to a couple close friends that have kids about this and they always say "You're playing with fire..."

Sorry if that seemed a little inappropriate, but I'm willing to take that chance. But maybe if we do have a kid, I may feel like Dragoon did in the previous post. I might take one look at my first ever child, and my heart will just melt. Well...I'm NOT willing to take that chance. No way...

MattyIce : It is all about discipline. If your nieces do not listen, it is because their parents (usually) give in to their pleas or have no consequences after putting menaces forward. Of course I do not imply you have to spank, but cutting something they like might make them think twice. I saw it with my cousins; those with lax parents were growing up out of control (the parents fortunately caught up) while the others with more disciplined parents were growing wiser.

Hmm Well I always wanted kids, but about two years ago I made a decision that kind of locked me out of that option: I decided that I wanted to remain single for good. No wife, no girlfriend, nothing. Ever.

I don't regret that decision. I made it partly for spiritual reasons and partly for business reasons (I would have had to limit my career because I would never be a husband or dad that left his wife and kids alone all of them time for work as it wouldn't be fair in my opinion). So yeah, two years later and I'm still happy about that decision. It took a lot of worry off of me, and finally solidified my path in life.


plus as
MattyIce : said, I'm an uncle who did a lot of kid watching. I seriously spent more time parenting my first nephew for the first four years of his life than his own parents, and as a result I feel like I've already been down that road for a bit (though obviously not eighteen or more years) and I just don't think I want to go there again, even if I could. I can say however that he's turned out to be a great kid so far, and I do feel a strong love and connection with him and he with me.

Long post short: I wanted them. I decided not to have them. Now I don't want them, though I know I would love them to pieces if I did and it'd be worth it.

I'm confident that some day I'll find the way to split in two

Talking seriously, for some odd reason, I can't take out of my head my cousin's daughter, born like a year ago, that came to visit us today. It has made me rethink my situation, and I'm starting to think it wouldn't be that bad having kids. It's weird for me to say this, as I've never liked kids, but I can't negate that I've changed a lot in the last months, so maybe I also changed in this field. I would first have to find a girlfriend, though, until now the search has been unsuccessful.

On the other hand, though, I'm in a similar situation to Eirinn. Next year, I'll seriously apply for my dream job, a job that won't enable me to spend more than 15 weeks a year at home. For this reason, I've been considering locking me out and consolidate my life for a while, and I think it would be the best decision, but I don't have a final answer yet.

I would be fine if I had just one!

I don't want it to be like kids in da shoe!

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