A couple of years ago, I had begun to work on my first novel, no, three novels. I had this great idea for what this trilogy was going to be like and I had everything laid out. I wrote the first chapter and I published in on Authors Den in order to get some feedback. Not a lot of people honestly liked it, though I can’t blame them since real action scenes don’t really come in until later in the book.

But still, I decided to stop writing. I still had the layout for all three books, but I have only published the first couple of chapters.

I have only been here for a week, but I really feel like I can trust you guys, I already talked about foster care, something that only three or four of my friends know.

So I decided to go ahead and type the next chapter and see what you think. The layout of chapter four is pretty lame, but it’s the next chapter that I have not worked on yet. The first few chapters of the book take place in Elmhurst, which is where I lived before I went into foster care.

Well… Here goes…


“Boys! Get down here,” Mom screamed from the living room. “ We will be late for the show, it starts in half an hour!”
“Boys!!” She screamed again a few seconds later.
“Mom!” I screamed back. “ Relax, all three of us are in the car, we’re waiting for you.
“Oh” was all mom said after that.
Mom climbed into the car and off we went. It was six at night when we left and we made it twenty three minutes later with just seven minutes to spare.
Mom was freaked out by the fact that the school burned down, she wanted to take us to the hospital but we argued that we wanted to see the show and we won.

“Hello” said the man standing in the ticket booth. “Welcome to Madison Square Garden. The Clarkston Magic Show will be on in five minutes, this is their first performance in New York in their ten year career.”
Dad gave the man our tickets and we walked through the tunnels and down the stairs until we found a group of seats in the sixth row.
After a couple of minutes a voice rang through the loudspeaker. “Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the fifth performance of the Clarkston Magic Show this year.”
“I have never been able to see my show, I’m stuck in my office all day but I can assure you that you will be amazed.”
“Before we get on to our signature acts, I would like to display a few of our local talents. First give it up for the boy from Flushing, New York. Martin Bolds!”
Everybody screamed as a young man walked up to the stage. I recognized him, he was a teenage magician who had his own television show.
“Hello” he said. “ Before I begin, I would like to tell you a bit about my childhood. My favorite thing to do was to play with bubbles.”
As he was talking he pulled out one of those small containers of bubble liquid.
“Would you know what my favorite thing to do with bubbles was?” He said as he blew a golf ball sized bubble that floated through the air.
He held out the palm of his hand and the bubble landed gently on it. The bubble did not pop, then he closed his fingers around it for a second or two before releasing it.
The bubble fell to the floor and shattered into a million tiny shards of glass. Everyone was shocked to be seeing it with their own eyes, I have only seen that trick on his show.
The next performer was not as good as Martin but he was still pretty good. He would juggle four metal bars while the ends of them were on fire.
It was not even close to magic, we knew the trick. There was a special kind of light that emits from the tips, its not fire.
I knew the next performer. He lives in Elmhurst. He came to perform one day at our school. His trick is that he can swallow swords, which is not a trick either. we knew it well.
As he puts the blade of the plastic sword in his mouth he presses a button, which makes the tip retract into the rest of the sword and that piece then retracts again, and so on until the sword is only a few inches in length.
The guy on the loudspeaker began to talk again. “Give it up for our hometown stars, and now we will take a quick break before turning to Clarkston’s famous acts.
First up was Marlon Brooks, a short man. He walked up to the front of the court and unfolded a huge picture of the stadium from a bird’s eye view.
Then, without warning of what he was going to do, He walked right into the picture and suddenly he was above the scoreboard, hanging on by one hand to the beam holding it up.
That was the best thing I have ever seen. It must have been a light. one that created an image of him on the ground.
Again, without warning, he let go of the beam and fell to the scoreboard. The only thing was, he never hit it. He was standing on the ground again.
“The next act will be done by Kevin Wood and Raun Jacobs!” Those names.
When they were set up, Kevin raised his right hand and the basketball a few feet from him was lifted in to the air. Next, without doing anything the ball was launched towards Raun.
All that Raun had to do was kick the air and about five feet from him, the ball curved and went back towards Kevin.
For the next five or so minutes the two of them would pass the ball back and fourth without ever touching it. This was even better than the last trick, how could they do it?
After that act, people went around selling souvenirs. I bought a bottle of the bubbles and I learned that when this type of bubble is exposed to the air, it dries up quickly which is how it was able to break.
His name was Liam Dawson, and when Raun tossed a bucket of water at him something happened. Something awesome.
The water just stopped midair and hung there suspended a few inches from Liam. Then, he lifted his hand and the water began to rise twenty feet into the air.
He made it look as if it were raining but the water was not moving at all. The water fell, hit the ground and splashed everyone in the crowd after that.
For his next trick, he pointed at the scoreboard and a thin bolt of lightning shot out of his fingernails before disappearing into the air.
Wow, this show is amazing. The next act would have been better than the last if only we had not known how it was done.
A guy walked onto the court, jumped into the air and when he landed there was a lion standing there.
It amazed almost the entire crowd except for me and my brother, it was just a simple trick of the light, there was nothing special about it.
“All right, how was it guys and girls? That is it, the Clarkston Magic Show is now over.” The guy in the loudspeaker said again.
“ We only have one more show this year and that will be tomorrow Saturday, April third, 2012 in Boston, Massachusetts. Have a great day.”
Wonderful show I thought to myself which it is safe to say that Victor was thinking the exact same thing.
Viktor was not even done with the show yet, he kept walking up and down the aisle going up to the vendors and buying things.
“ How was it?” Dad asked. “ No, I don’t even have to ask you guys that, I know that you loved it. Well its nine thirty, we have to get some sleep, we have a big day ahead of us. We have to spend the whole day looking for a new school for the two of you.

We went to burger King afterwards and I had no idea that mom invited the entire baseball team over for the party. We had such a great time that day, when we arrived home, I found a skateboard for me and there was a bike for Victor.
I said my good-nights to my family and I ran up to my room, I was exhausted. I did not bother to take a shower or even take of my shoes, I just jumped in the bed and was sleeping in seconds.

The next day, I did not want to get up. It was now Saturday and we had to go school hunting. Why? I do not know. It is April, only 3 more months of school left so why would we have to look for a school so late in the year?
Well anyway, we were in the car at about 8 am and we were heading down queens Boulevard a few minutes later. It took us only 5 minutes to get to the school but the boredom of what was in store for us today made it seem like an hour has gone by.


You can’t really follow along without reading the other chapters, but what did you think of this one? Was it just regular bad, or really bad? I want some honest opinions here please.