Hello fellow Vizzed users, how are you all doing in these harsh times?

As you probably noticed, my name on pretty much everywhere I go, is Seishiro Leonhart, I was a former Site Staff of Vizzed Board on the day 06-17-12 (good thing I registered it on my profile) onwards.

People who were still active since 2012, MAY still remember me somewhat, or not, I don't know, I was probably gone for like forever, came back to Vizzed at some random point, then vanished again.

Today, when washing dishes at home, I found myself thinking about Vizzed, and I remembered the "Vizzed Camp 2012" competition I participated, I remembered about the group Slam Dunk(?), I found a post made by legacyme3 (sorry for random mention, you were one of the most memorable people for me), mentioning the Mafia games are being hosted on Discord, and I saw mlb789 post, which reminded me of "The Fighting Mongooses", and looking through my Layouts, I found my own team, "The Ultimate Vizzards", and I remembered, that at the end of the Camp, I was classified by legacyme3 A.K.A. Jake (I didn't forget your name), I was a player feared on the High Score competitions.

This was pretty much the reason I decided to come back, back then, I started facing what depression was about, but I suppose I can say I had plenty of fun back then, obviously I was immature at the time (I was 15 years old back then) but still, somehow, even if at the bottom of my chest, I believe I never truly forgot about Vizzed, and I admit that the last time I came back (and even this current time I am), when I saw the Vizzed Board layout, it seemed... polluted to me, I'm not sure if it's because I was away for so long, the colors didn't attract me back then, I don't know really. But this time I decided to make this post to whoever sees it, or even take time to read, I want to stick around a bit to see if anyone posts in here, specially people I knew back then.

About myself, after I have become inactive on Vizzed, I started living the worst years of my life, remember the possible depression I mentioned, during my time on Vizzed? Let's just say after I left Vizzed I felt things get worse, the thought of incapability, uselesness and the desire for... you know what, something that starts with "D" got stronger and stronger, and I was literally just living each day because I was just alive, then at July 2017, my personal best friend invited me to visit his apartment, which was on another State that I lived in. He paid all my travelling expenses, and I can say I lived my best 13 days of my life, it could have been more, but I had to return because I needed to do an interview at a possible course, and at the end of this course, there was a chance I would be directed to a possible job, and that's how on 04-01-2018 to 03-01-2019, I managed to get my first job, after I managed to get this job, I felt like all the darkness in my life to vanish. I felt independent, for once in my life, but sadly, that didn't last long, since it was a temporary contract... I thought it would be easy for me to get another job, but I kept "Leaving it for tomorrow" and after 1 year, I am staggered here once again, with a low self-esteem again, and living with the doubts "I am not good enough", "Why am I living in this mental prison?", "Will I ever feel free again?", and the list goes on.
At least one thing I carry on my mind: Even if my body is starting to feel the consequences of heavy stress, I managed to go through what seemed to be a sea of endless suffering, and even if the thought of "giving up for good", pretty much shows on my mind almost every single day, I kept going on, I am still going on, I feel I want to give up, but thanks for our lord and saviour God and Jesus Christ, my own intuition, and most importantly, believe on God/Jesus promises for my life and my family's life, I was able to survive to this day, and hopefully, until the day God decides it's my time to leave this world.

Sorry if this feels like a "Heavy" thread of some sorts, move this thread if needed, I kinda felt like sharing a little part of my current, and past "seemingly hopeless life", and hopefully, I can get to see a few familiar names, and have the pleasure of saying "Hello" once more.

Edit: Yes I used this layout for the sake of the memories.
And I forgot how to mention other users.

Another member that returns after a long time to the Land of V! Welcome back!

Your name does ring a bell to me. I joined the staff team months before you stepped down, but that's everything we "shared", if it can even be called that way. Still, glad to see you back and with full intention of staying.

We all go through hardships in real life. Months, years, even decades of enduring all sorts of pain, both physical and psychological. But we do have the strength to fight back and get our lives back on track. You already did that once when you landed your first job, so you now know you can make it out, and as long as you don't really give up, you'll succeed.

I hope to see you around! You can go check for threads made by other returning users while you wait for people to notice yours, maybe that can also be a reason for them to stay around if they start seeing more familiar faces again.

Welcome back to Vizzed.

The site is no longer as active as it was back in 2012 (and I take some of the blame in that, since I have made little to no effort to re-energize things with games.

I'm sorry if it disappoints you, since most of your best memories seem to have been playing the games I hosted (Mafia, Vizzed Camp, etc), but I actually don't host games anymore. I'm too busy with my real life (I'm 27 now!) to be able to host games with any sort of reliability.

I have two open right now (NDND 4.0 and The Generic Adventurer) but one I haven't had time to actually update yet, and the other I haven't had any interest in.

Things have been weird here since those halcyon days.

Welcome back man

I remember talking a bit back in the day and your name is definitely unique enough to remember haha.


Too much has changed since you were last active to sum up all at once but right now we're aiming to be as community focused as possible. The old chat is long gone but we have a discord server you're always welcome to join. I think there's a stickied thread somewhere with an invite link but if you can't find it feel free to ask

Glad to hear you were able to temporarily feel good working your job. Just keep hopeful that will happen again in the future

ohi

OMG Seishiro my pet dragon has come back! how have you been? I really missed you around here. I'm glad you have come in just to check on vizzed and stuff.

EX Palen : Your name also rings me a bell, even though we probably haven't talked a lot.

legacyme3 : It's kinda sad to know that Vizzed went on a downside after I left, do you believe it's still possible for Vizzed to become active again?

Furret : I remember seeing your name plenty of times back then, it's quite impressive you made it to Admin!

yoshirulez! : Henlo

Eniitan : It's great to see you're still around Vizzed, and now as a Local Mod!

legacyme3 : Wait, you're only 4 years older than me? It felt like such a huge gap back when I was a teenager.

As for the OP. Can't say I recall you, but I'm sure we crossed paths. I was active until 2013. It's great to see people return from the 2009 - 2011 era.

Seishiro Leonhart :

My bet is on "no".

Forums are a dying breed. People don't want to interact on forums anymore, regrettably. That's not to say Vizzed can't be more active than it is now... but gone forever are the days of 2011-2014. If you want those back, your only real option are the large forums where nobody knows who you are.

Minuano is doing a great job trying to keep things stable. But this site is probably never going to grow again.

pennylessz :

People got it in their heads that I'm a lot older than I actually am, because I'm close friends with geeogree and David, who are in their 30s.

It's not big anymore, because we've had a few younger globals/etc now, but for a while, there were a lot of people who were mad at me, because I was one of the youngest globals in site history when I was a global during the prime years of Vizzed.

I've never hidden my age. It's right there on my profile. You just assumed I was older than I was.

Welcome back to Vizzed! I'm doing well, but yeah these times have been harsh. I've barely seen my real life friends, so I needed something more to fill up my time and I returned to Vizzed this April.

That's awesome that you had much better days when you got to hang out with your friend at his apartment! I've had some really nice days when my friends invited me to do stuff with them, and sometimes it wasn't planned before that day

I've had my fair share of mental health issues too. I've experienced anxiety attacks and depression, and I had both in my senior year of high school when I really should've been more happy.

Thankfully, I also have gotten through it because of Jesus. I've been blessed with other friends who have struggled with anxiety and depression too. They helped me with my perspective. And spending time with Jesus and sometimes crying out for help... that changed my situation and made me feel that I could make it through the pain. Now I've been able to help many others with their mental health struggles. I still struggle with mental health today (especially with literally my whole world being changed this year), but the way I handle it is better than it used to be.

Enjoy your time back on the site!

legacyme3 : I think it had more to do with the difference between 14 and 17 seeming huge in adolescence.

Welcome back, good to hear from you

Of course I remember you. I've seen so many active users come and go but they all each have a special place in my memories and you're no exception. I sometimes forget how long users have been away for because my reality of time doesn't seem to be the same with online events compared to real life events. Things that took place 4 years ago online might only seem like they were 2 years ago. It's weird.

I think one of the best things this community has done since it's inception is offering support and comfort to its users. The community itself would be nothing without the users, the staff and I are really only just tools to help keep the flow going. The features, the Retro Game Room, and all other content, are just addons to one of the internet's oldest communities. The users are the heart and soul of this site, they've been there for each other (and for me) and I find that to be incredible.

Anyways, the site's posting activity had seen an all time low a few years ago but is in the progress of a slow recovery so hoping you'll be able to stick around and help us make that possible.

Nice to hear my name rings a bell to you as well, because indeed we haven't talked all that much. Maybe that can change from this summer on as I plan to become a bit more active both here and in Discord (the latter will cost a bit more because I've never been a chat person, but I'll still try).

Seishiro Leonhart : I actually do not remember you, then again I didn't start my forum activity till 2013-2014 so I probably missed you. You seem like a cool lad though, even more so that we share similar tastes, give it a thought and you could figure it out.

Also if you use Discord we have a server, it's pretty chill my dude.

While I can't say I remember you as I was not active back then I will gladly say it's always good to see a returning member of the site. It sounds like you've been through a lot during your time away so I hope things are going better for you now at least somewhat.