I'm really getting tired of this! It feels like things get better, then they get worse. I'm still having money issues. I have a job, but work has been ridiculously slow. Now, all of a sudden things pick up, and we're working mad overtime! 10 hour days, 5 days a week, and even Saturdays to try to get caught up. As a result, I can't get time to take care of: taxes, upcoming maintenance on my truck, groceries, getting money from the bank to pay for all of this, I still don't have the money, I can't get my former employer to fix my W-2s from last year that are screwed up because he didn't think it was much of a priority, etc. And by the way, my relationship with my family is continuing to be terrible.

I have people I can talk to now, but it isn't helping. I'm starting to fall into depression again. I don't even have time to make this thread because I have to work today too. I'm losing interest in this site because I'm not getting time to come here. I don't want to leave, but it is hard to get time to come here anymore. Things still feel dead here, and there is very little activity. I really can't talk to anyone at work about this, but I do have other places to go. Most people don't understand how overwhelmed I feel. Is any of this going to work out?

How am I going to get to a from work without transportation? Am I going to be able to get this maintenance done, how much is going to have to be done, and how much is it going to cost? Am I going to be able to get my taxes done before April 15 with my work schedule being such a mess right now? I can't just take time off!! What if my bank card decides to stop working? Am I ever going to have some financial stability? What if my parents (mainly my dad) want me out of their house? That means, I'm homeless, I'll have to give away: my truck (which will lead to me having to quit work because of no transportation! WTF! and Why?), my computer (which means no more: reviews, Vizzed, communication with friends who have been helping me with my depression).

My dad is controlling everything, and his button is on the trigger. He's had to come out of retirement to work the same job I quit back in October to get a better job where I can work. Before any of you start judging me: I WANT TO WORK!! I'M TRYING TO WORK!! AND I'M TRYING TO GET OUT ON MY OWN!! I'M TRYING TO KEEP WHAT I HAVE BECAUSE OTHERWISE, THIS IS HOPELESS!! Maybe, I just need to quit Vizzed again like I did last year until this gets straightened out. I'm not feeling it right now, and I have to go to work.  

You have power over your mind – not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength. Sounds like things are really tough for you. I remember reading some of your other posts about how terrible things are going with your family; I'm sad to see they haven't improved. 

An important thing is to keep talking about it. You don't want to obsess over your problems, but almost every consiler or psychologist would say that it's good for our mental health to both say and write how we feel. If you need to leave vizzed, fine, but perhaps start a journal. Better yet, you can find a counselor to speak to (though I know time isn't really something you have!)

One thing that I found helpful is thinking about what the great philosopher Epictetus said: 

"For every challenge, remember the resources you have within you to copy with it. Provoked by the sight of a handsome man or a beautiful woman, you will discover within you the contrary power of self-restraint. Faced with pain, you will discover the power of endurance. If you are insulted, you will discover patience. In time, you will grow to be confident that there is not a single impression that you will not have the moral means to tolerate."

I also like this one by philosopher and roman emperor, Marcus Aurelius: 
"You have power over your mind – not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength."

Hand in there, and never feel like asking someone for help is a failure. 

Light Knight : Thanks for the support. I've been getting help from other people right now and am starting to realize there is only so much I can do. I feel like that's my problem. I've burned myself out and need to back off from tasks I know are impossible. My environment is constantly one that keeps pushing me to do things I don't feel like I can do, but I'm also with someone now that provides comfort and solace for me too.

I need more people like this in my life, and I also need Vizzed for support and have found this community to be pretty supportive also. I'm working all the time right now and trying to get on full time with this company, but I'm running into issues with that too. I'm not going to kill myself trying to do it. If I'm just a temp associate, then so be it! I've already got my direct deposit set up with them and know I'm going to continue to make good money with them.

Money is the key to my happiness because it will get me to where I can take care of myself and get away from my family. I'm just going to leave. I just need money right now, and as long as we're getting this overtime, I can fix my life. That's how I deal with my depression. I work! When I'm working, I'm fixing things. I work, go home, live my life! I have relationships but nothing serious because most women I get serious about have too many unresolved issues they don't want to work through.

I want to work through my problems and end up with someone who's the same way. All of this is what helps me with my depression. I've already hit rock bottom, and that was last year. I'm continuing to learn from that and what not to do. It's still a learning process, but now, I'm not alone.