Two Chuck Norris jokes:

1. When Chuck Norris jumps in a pool, he doesn't get wet. The water gets Chuck Norris

2.Ghost sit around campfires telling stories about Chuck Norris on camping trips.

That funny enough for you or what?

What did the shark say after he ate the fish? Fin!

I'm gonna take a crack at it anyway with some Chuck Norris jokes.
-----
Before the Bogey Man goes to bed each night, he checks the closet for Chuck Norris.
-----
Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil in exchange for eternal life. He then roundhouse kicked the devil and took his soul back. The devil admitted he should've seen it coming. They now play poker every Tuesday.
If both of these make you laugh, do I get 6000 Viz?

Well, it shows the image in the preview, but the image isn't there in the post. Not sure what is going on there.

Here a funny picture!! LOL

A young man named
John received a parrot as a gift.
The parrot had a
bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary.
Every word out of
the bird's mouth was rude, obnoxious and
laced with
profanity. John tried very hard to change the
bird's attitude by
consistently saying only polite words,
playing soft music,
and doing anything else he could think of
to "clean up" the
bird's vocabulary. Finally, John was fed
up and he screamed
at the parrot.


The parrot yelled
back. John hollered even louder and the
parrot got angrier
and even ruder. John, in desperation,
threw up his hands,
grabbed the bird and put him in the
freezer.



For a few minutes
the parrot squawked and kicked and
screamed. Then
suddenly there was total quiet. Not a peep
was heard for over
a minute. Fearing that he'd hurt the
parrot, John
quickly opened the door to the freezer.


The parrot calmly
stepped out onto John's outstretched
arms and said, "I
believe I may have offended you with my
rude language and
actions. I'm sincerely remorseful for my
inappropriate
transgressions and I fully intend to do
everything I can to
correct my rude and unforgivable
behavior."



John was stunned at
the change in the bird's attitude.


As he was about to
ask the parrot what had made such a
dramatic change in
his behavior, the bird continued,
"May I ask what the
turkey did?"

At first, I thought, "Why is that Frisbee getting bigger?" but then it hit me.

I know a super funny one. Why did the student eat his homework Because it was a piece of cake.

What do you get when you mix an elephant with a rhino el-if-rhino.

...Joke's a bit dirty, but whatever. =P
Man 1: Hey, man, I got my first blowjob today!
Man 2: Oh, really? How was it?
Man 1:...It tasted funny...

(badum-tsss!)

Jcs1 : Not sure if you're still doing this, but here's (de)motivational posters.

Do you like Sonic The Hedgehog? If you do,does it count if I send you a link to a very funny sonic video? And if you've already seen it,you don't have to send me any Viz.

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen."

The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me." The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."

sonamyfan600 : So are you just looking for all the open joke contest threads and copy/pasting your post in them? I saw that you just recently said this on a-sassy-black-lady's joke thread.

Clearly people didn't bother to read that he already picked a winner. (if you want to continue this, let me know and I'll reopen it for you)

--closed--

Ah you can close it if you want,it just seemed kinda easier by copy/pasting posts.lol

Did they close this thread or already pick the winner, Because I was going to consider a joke that was suppose to be funny that would make a laugh. 

Do you wanna know how I got these scars........  From batman?........ From Batman!!!!!!!!! 






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