I think that in general revenge is not always the best thing. Hurting someone the same way they hurt you or even worse does not sound like "sweet revenge" it is best to forgive and forget in my opinion.

I think that there are more ways than one to get revenge. You don't always have to use physical force, but I do believe that all in all that revenge is really best only when you can be sure of two things:

1. You know they aren't going to retaliate (ie they die)
2. You gain something out of it.

Just my point of view on it, I suppose some won't agree. lol

Revenge:

The bad thing about revenge is that once you take your revenge, do you really accomplish anything?  And what's to stop the person you took revenge on from taking revenge for the revenge, etc...  That's how blood feuds start. 

No, I think the Bible has it right when it says "Vengeance is mine: I shall repay, saith the Lord" (for the religious Rom. 12:19).  Truly, who's to say what is appropriate revenge?  Is it something greater than what was done to you?  Even justice is a rough one.  Who decides what is the right amount of punishment for a wrong done?

All one has to do is examine America's justice system to see that even "justice" is not just.

No, I believe in the saying -- "what goes around comes around."  People who do something wrong to another person eventually pay for that wrong. 

Besides, forgiveness is a much bigger and greater "revenge" on a wrongdoer.  When a person truly forgives someone, the emotional bonds that tie them together through the wrong done are severed and the person doing the forgiving can get on with their life and not have to worry about what was done any more...

Well, I've spoken my peace.  I hope that I have not offended anyone.  If anyone does not agree with my using religion in my argument, I am sorry.  Please forgive me.  I was brought up that way and what I learned as a child has greatly influenced me.  I am 56 and have seen a lot of people hurt by revenge, both giving and receiving.  I do not like revenge!

I would look for revenge, then I would get over it after a few days it happen.

The Planned Accident : It is sort of similar to the old saying that as I have gotten older the more it seems to make sense to me. “What goes around, comes around.” As far as revenge well… I will admit whole heartedly that there have been times over the years in various situations that I have been so full of anger about a situation that sometimes rational thinking and reason can take a back seat to the feelings that you may be feeling at the time.

In my case there have been break ups in relationships both on a friendship and romantic level but also, things on a professional level that have not been the easiest things to deal with. There certainly has been plenty of anger, especially with regard to what I have dealt with professionally over the last couple of years that has sent my stress level up and has caused so much grief. Although it is tempting sometimes while being in a state of anger to think or perhaps even say things you don’t mean in regard to a situation it’s best to sit and wait things out. Sometimes it is easier said than done especially when there are several stressful situations occurring at once which can make things seem hopeless.

Often after having significant time to reflect and let things settle rational thinking and reason will win out over feelings of anger if you let it. There are several people on a personal level that I went several years without any contact whatsoever due to either situations and or, fallouts and I firmly believed that I would never get to a place in my life where I would feel willing to open the door of communication to most of these people even to say so much as a “Hi, how are you?” to these people again.

Almost two years ago, I was forced to get into social networking for business reasons. I will not lie I did not want to do this and quite frankly the only reason I did was because I was more or less forced to. One of my concerns other than being admittedly a fish out of water and out of my element was running into certain people that I had no interest in talking to again due to strained feelings. Even when in my case it has been not just a couple of years but many years since I had any contact with many of these people, things like that can run through your mind; especially when your life is in many ways totally different than it was when you saw these people on a regular basis.

I was pretty much caught between a rock and a hard case to a degree because I really didn’t have the choice of wanting to do social media and because of my being a writer and being involved in media I really didn’t have much of an option to pick and choose who I allowed access to. It was a real dilemma for me because I had plenty of anger toward some of these people but at the same time, because of my responsibilities I couldn’t really shut anyone out.

So for a little while I allowed myself to be accessible but always cautious of people. For the most part the people I reconnected with were more respectful and polite that I expected them to be. It was also refreshing to a degree to have people go “How have you been?” instead of automatically rehashing events and nonsense of the past. After a couple of conversations that weren’t very comfortable at first the anger I had toward certain people sort of slowly dissipated and in some cases friendships kind of got a new foundation and some of these people have been very nice toward me since. I realize as I say that, that it won’t be that way with every person I may come across but I think it proves a point that wanting revenge on someone or maybe more than one person for what ever reason just isn’t really productive and there are far better things you can do with your time.

Although for the most part I am still very cautious and keep to myself I really don’t have much anger for anyone now. Of course there are certain people and situations where anger will come up but as I’ve gotten older I have learned to give people more of a chance rather than probably coming off as bitter to some people. I have learned to show that I am a bigger person to at least give most people a chance to at least see what they have to say before deciding how I should approach things. I know that I am by far not a perfect person and have made more than my fair share of mistakes and errors in judgment and such. I would hope and do that after so many years that people wouldn’t have any resentment toward me and that the past can stay where it belongs, in the past…

It isn’t always easy to do that but hopefully it’s possible for most people because the reality is although anger can be beneficial in some ways if used to as motivation in a good way, if not dealt with it will slowly eat away at you and will make bitter and miserable. It isn’t worth it.

Phil Sims : Very wisely stated.  I was trying to figure out a way to say pretty much what you did.
If you set out to seek revenge, in all honesty, it's your victim that has 'won'.  By seeking revenge, they will see that they did indeed bother you as they had wished to.  If they were seeking a fight, you've given it to them by seeking revenge.  Worse, if you get into trouble in some form and fashion, they've gotten you again. Because you let your emotions get the best of you, they get the satisfaction of seeing you in trouble.  Even if they also get in trouble, it's still a thing of pride on their part: You got in trouble too.

Forgiveness is indeed, the biggest revenge you can get.  Then, absolutely nothing takes place other than the fact that you've shown someone YOU can control your emotions, and that you are above being affected by their actions.

The most pathetic thing a person can do is strive for revenge.  While you are scheming the person you are trying to destroy is sleeping well.  They care nothing about you.  Leave the past in the past.

Sometimes I go for revenge...  Mostly with friends or family, so it's not too serious, but I feel bad most of the time when I do it.  I don't really seek revenge anymore, even though sometimes I say I will.  Well, I don't...   Sometimes, people go a bit too far though when it comes to seeking revenge.  I used to do little things, now I really don't seek revenge often.  Maybe with friends to mess around, but that's it!  

I don't understand why certain people want to take revenge on others, who may have harmed them in whatever which way they did so. It doesn't make the situation any better. And it can often make someone bitter. It's really sad when you think about it.

I only do revenge for very trivial things.


For example: You insult me in Left 4 Dead 2? Watch out; I'm a boomer and me vomiting on you is going to be my top priority~ I'll make sure if it ain't gonna be ANYONE making to the safe room, it's going to be you!



For anything bigger than something like that, I will more than likely shrug it off and or ignore it. I do however keep grudges to myself. Unless it's as serious of a situation as Oldschool41 says.

I personally think that going for revenge is a good thing, because they shouldn't at first did anything to harm you exspecially if you was just minding your own business. today we read a book about revenge and it was interesting it was called the "cask of Amontillado" something like that.

I still say that going for revenge doesn't do any good.  From a secular standpoint, it's even a bad idea.  If you go for revenge and succeed, the person you sought revenge against is bound to do the same. Then, you've encouraged the continuation of a vicious cycle of immaturity and ridiculousness.

If you FAIL at getting revenge, then you've just made yourself look stupid and you've only damaged your image even further.

I think this personally is a silly and trivial argument against revenge, but I understand that many people won't understand the spiritual side of why revenge is bad.

Why bother with revenge? It doesn't make you a better person... in fact, much the opposite. You become as bad as the person who wronged you if not worse. They'll more than likely get their punishment without you doing anything. It's very rare for someone to go through life wronging others and not encountering any trouble for it.

mr.keys: : Please tell me you're joking....? How is it a good thing? All it does is make matters worse and even if the other person did something to you first, how does getting revenge on them make you better than them? It doesn't, it makes you just as bad if not worse.

Singelli : Exactly. It becomes an unending cycle of people hurting one another and no one ever actually "wins". It's a lose/lose situation and a waste of everyone's time. It's just unnecessary drama.

Crazy Li : I agree completely. In my opinion it makes you worse and also a hypocrite. You rant and rave about how much they hurt you and then you go and do the same because "they did it to you first".

SunflowerGaming : Right. The only thing I'd ever do to someone who wronged me is simply ignore them... treat them as if they no longer exist (because in my world, they don't). If they're actually bothered by that, they can try to make amends. I'm a fairly forgiving person.

I do not believe in revenge. my father believes in karma, The cosmic principle that basically states 'Do something bad and something bad will happen upon you'. I don't believe in karma either. I honestly don't think revenge is a healthy state of mind even though lots of people have those thoughts.

klemish : It's not healthy at all. I don't really believe in karma either... at least not that there's some force actively trying to balance the world... but I do think bad people end up getting theirs anyway. It's just the nature of things. One can only do so much bad before people get fed up with it and do something about it. Or sometimes not even people... maybe someone goes and tries to torture animals and the animals end up attack him.

Crazy Li : Exactly! Why waste your time and energy on someone who isn't worth it? Ignoring them most often than not, makes them want to make amends because they can't stand to be ignored.

klemish : So true, and most often you end up getting it back ten fold.

Crazy Li : Mhm *Nods head* And as for the people getting fed up. It saddens to think that maybe someone picks the wrong day and somebody ends up beating the hell out of them. Maybe the person will think next time lol.