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Whats the worst excuse you could say when you get pulled over by a cop?

 

12-11-11 04:16 AM
legacyme3 is Offline
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Cop : sir, have you been drinking?
Guy : I had to. If I didn't the President would have been shot by Sarah Palin and I'd be forcefed a diaper taco.
Cop : ...
Cop : sir, have you been drinking?
Guy : I had to. If I didn't the President would have been shot by Sarah Palin and I'd be forcefed a diaper taco.
Cop : ...
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12-11-11 04:31 AM
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Cop: May I see your registration and ID
Someone on Vizzed: Sure, 1 sec...
*PRINTER NOISE GOING OFF IN BACKGROUND
Someone on Vizzed: Here is my registration email and my id is 553.
Cop: What are you smoking?
Someone on Vizzed: TIRE RUBBER, CATCH YA LATER BACON BOY!!!!!!!
Cop: May I see your registration and ID
Someone on Vizzed: Sure, 1 sec...
*PRINTER NOISE GOING OFF IN BACKGROUND
Someone on Vizzed: Here is my registration email and my id is 553.
Cop: What are you smoking?
Someone on Vizzed: TIRE RUBBER, CATCH YA LATER BACON BOY!!!!!!!
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12-13-11 04:31 AM
legacyme3 is Offline
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JigSaw :

What... the... hell?

I'm still trying to digest what happened. haha
JigSaw :

What... the... hell?

I'm still trying to digest what happened. haha
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12-13-11 05:21 AM
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legacyme3 : Basically someone was showing the cop their vizzed email and id since the cop asked for registration and id.
legacyme3 : Basically someone was showing the cop their vizzed email and id since the cop asked for registration and id.
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12-13-11 05:24 AM
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JigSaw :

I get it now, but it's such an odd context hahah
JigSaw :

I get it now, but it's such an odd context hahah
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12-13-11 05:10 PM
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“Yea, I was going fast so I could beat you to your house and f*ck your wife.”
“Yea, I was going fast so I could beat you to your house and f*ck your wife.”
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12-16-11 03:07 AM
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So...this is a rather true story. But...I thought it would be great to put it here.

I have diabetes. So when my sugar gets low I get a little dilusional...and kinda pissed. So a friend of mine was driving me down the highway in a Shelby gt at 150 miles an hour. He proceeds to drive to my house at that same speed. When he pulls into my driveway a cop pulls up and starts to question my friend Sam. Well I had already ran into the house so I figured I was going to run out of the house doing something...rather stupid. I took all the sugar I had and rubbed it on my face, got naked, and ran outside screaming about how Sam had sex with my girlfriend. The cop slowly backed up, got into his vehicle, and drove away. Lucky for Sam I wasn't actually an angry coke addict who was pissed off about his unloyal woman.
So...this is a rather true story. But...I thought it would be great to put it here.

I have diabetes. So when my sugar gets low I get a little dilusional...and kinda pissed. So a friend of mine was driving me down the highway in a Shelby gt at 150 miles an hour. He proceeds to drive to my house at that same speed. When he pulls into my driveway a cop pulls up and starts to question my friend Sam. Well I had already ran into the house so I figured I was going to run out of the house doing something...rather stupid. I took all the sugar I had and rubbed it on my face, got naked, and ran outside screaming about how Sam had sex with my girlfriend. The cop slowly backed up, got into his vehicle, and drove away. Lucky for Sam I wasn't actually an angry coke addict who was pissed off about his unloyal woman.
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12-19-11 11:30 AM
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"Sir why are you going so fast?"
"because im going to NARNIA!"
"Sir why are you going so fast?"
"because im going to NARNIA!"
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12-19-11 05:15 PM
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"Oh no officer it's ok...I'm from Canada."
"Oh no officer it's ok...I'm from Canada."
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12-19-11 06:44 PM
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I was testing your speed radar to make sure it was working. I think  a "thank you" is in order here?
I was testing your speed radar to make sure it was working. I think  a "thank you" is in order here?
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12-24-11 11:33 PM
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"What's the problem, Occiffer? There's blood in my alcohol."

Cop: And what was you're reason for speeding?
Me: To get pulled over and help you bastards pay for doughnuts.
"What's the problem, Occiffer? There's blood in my alcohol."

Cop: And what was you're reason for speeding?
Me: To get pulled over and help you bastards pay for doughnuts.
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12-29-11 11:58 AM
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Officer: Sir, step out of the car, please.

Guy: Oh...sure officer...just let me unbuckle my---Woooaah...I'm not wearing a seat belt... o.o That's some illegal stuff man.

Officer: . . . . . Did you know that you were speeding, sir?

Guy: What?! That stuffs still working? I took that stuff 3 days ago, man!
Officer: Sir, step out of the car, please.

Guy: Oh...sure officer...just let me unbuckle my---Woooaah...I'm not wearing a seat belt... o.o That's some illegal stuff man.

Officer: . . . . . Did you know that you were speeding, sir?

Guy: What?! That stuffs still working? I took that stuff 3 days ago, man!
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05-20-12 02:30 PM
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HelloOOOoo Mr Hand Handsom...

Oops tee hee I mean Hanson



or



HelloOOOoo Mr Pretty...
Oops tee hee I mean Petty
I got this off 'Friends' so dont quote me for these lol, tbh they're kind of taken out of context anyway lol
HelloOOOoo Mr Hand Handsom...

Oops tee hee I mean Hanson



or



HelloOOOoo Mr Pretty...
Oops tee hee I mean Petty
I got this off 'Friends' so dont quote me for these lol, tbh they're kind of taken out of context anyway lol
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05-20-12 04:55 PM
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Cop: Why did you run over the president of the United States purposely?
Me: Oh, was that Mr. President? I thought it was just a poster board of him.
Cop: So you still hit it even though you thought it was just a poster board?
Me: Um... what I meant to say was I thought it was Justin Bieber.
Cop: Okay, that clears things up.
Cop: Why did you run over the president of the United States purposely?
Me: Oh, was that Mr. President? I thought it was just a poster board of him.
Cop: So you still hit it even though you thought it was just a poster board?
Me: Um... what I meant to say was I thought it was Justin Bieber.
Cop: Okay, that clears things up.
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06-02-12 09:42 PM
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Cop: Do you know why I pulled you over?
Me: Is it for driving without a licence, driving drunk, drinking underage, driving underage, smoking underage, or the drug paraphernalia and dead body in the back seat?
Cop: Step out of the car, please.
Cop: Do you know why I pulled you over?
Me: Is it for driving without a licence, driving drunk, drinking underage, driving underage, smoking underage, or the drug paraphernalia and dead body in the back seat?
Cop: Step out of the car, please.
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07-18-12 10:36 PM
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Well when it comes to anything that you stole or you have like drugs ,
guns and stuff on you and they see it or ask " It is yours ? "
The worst thing to say right away is " Its not mine !!! "
When a person that's busted or caught says this it is
obviously a flat out lie .  
Well when it comes to anything that you stole or you have like drugs ,
guns and stuff on you and they see it or ask " It is yours ? "
The worst thing to say right away is " Its not mine !!! "
When a person that's busted or caught says this it is
obviously a flat out lie .  
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07-20-12 08:31 PM
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The worst thing to say period I believe is " I didn't know" if you say that 9 times out of 10 you getting put in some cuffs.
The worst thing to say period I believe is " I didn't know" if you say that 9 times out of 10 you getting put in some cuffs.
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07-21-12 10:21 PM
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I think the worst thing to say is that you were in a hurry and didn't notice the speed limit. That I an almost instant ticket and a huge fine. I usually try to play the I'm dyslexic card, what it works some times, even though I am not. 
I think the worst thing to say is that you were in a hurry and didn't notice the speed limit. That I an almost instant ticket and a huge fine. I usually try to play the I'm dyslexic card, what it works some times, even though I am not. 
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07-23-12 04:24 PM
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Cop: Sir, did you knew that you were going over the Speed limit?

Random guy: Oh, yea?

Cop: Yes.

Random Guy: Well, That's because... uh, I have a bomb in my car! It will explode if I stop!

Cop: But... His car is not moving... and it didn't exploded yet.

Random Guy: Uhhh... SEE YA LATER, SUCKAH!

*drives away at top speed*
Cop: Sir, did you knew that you were going over the Speed limit?

Random guy: Oh, yea?

Cop: Yes.

Random Guy: Well, That's because... uh, I have a bomb in my car! It will explode if I stop!

Cop: But... His car is not moving... and it didn't exploded yet.

Random Guy: Uhhh... SEE YA LATER, SUCKAH!

*drives away at top speed*
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01-23-13 08:31 PM
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Hello officer the reason I was speeding was because my friend over there is just a plain old prick *while no one is next to you
Hello officer I have to puke/pee/crap now.
Hello officer the reason I was speeding was because my friend over there is just a plain old prick *while no one is next to you
Hello officer I have to puke/pee/crap now.
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