When you're done building, you realize your finger was stuck and implanted into the screen, cutting it off and you bleeding to death.

I enter a dance competition that's secured by guards! (to make the scenario harder)

goodboy : But when an assassin is hired they will find a way to kill you no matter what. The assassin pays off some guards and gets into the competition as well,
when he's dancing beside you he whips out his bowie knife and slashes your neck open.

I'm petting my cat.

but as you are stroking it, you notice its fur is slightly wet and you hear a sizzling noise and you realize it is acid and your hand burns off, dissolves and disintegrates and it spreads burning the rest of your body and leaving you to as a pile of ashes that gets blown away, never to return.

I am eating a mint ice cream cone

You accidentally eat it all as well as the cone itself. After that, you choke on it and die. YOU ARE DEAD!

I get the ability to shapeshift into any Pokemon and back at any time.

Ok well I shot the Pokemon in the face with a desert eagle so now your dead in both Pokemon and human form.


I am out in the middle of the Atlantic ocean in a nice big boat. 

Divine Aurora : You forgot to bring means of procuring food whilst on board the vessel and therefore, as you left your aquatic vehicle to retrieve said foodstuff, you stumbled and rotated your rectal sphincter to an unnatural angle, which then caused your body to go into a state of septic shock and you die after several agonizing days in a hospital. 

I am posting on Vizzed forums in Joseph Ducreux-type language, hereby making it slightly more difficult to understand.

LolWutPear : Because your posting in that language people get frustrated and ban you. You die of heart ach.





I learnt to read Deadric script.

Chindogu : You are learning to read Deadric script.  You're looking at it on your mobile device while walking crossing a street.  You step back suddenly when a bus comes flying down the road.  Shaking your head, you look both ways and jump off the curb.  You cross the street, cut through a yard on a shortcut when a man steps out and points a shotgun at you.  

"You're the one looking through our windows at my wife!" he shouts.

You're not.  You're in the wrong spot at the wrong time.  You drop your stuff and sprint to the fence.  He chases you down, stopping to fire blasts with his shotgun.  Pellets whine over your shoulder.  You jump the fence, fall down an embankment, end up in a river between two alligators.

They smile.

You are dead.


I laughed on my couch as I wrote this.

warmaker : You get sucked in between the couch cushions and suffocate.
You are dead.

I went to my best friends house.

He set a trap with knives so when you opened the door, they all fell on you.
I went on Vizzed.

You struck by lighting and your sucked into the game your playing
Good news : your good at the game Bad news : its contra III alien wars and your immediately bit by a dog and die
You go see a final destination movie

retropokemon : The deaths portrayed there, depending on which FD movie actually happen to you, you live it once the movie is over. You are dead.

I turn on the TV...

1sam234 : You turn on the TV expecting to relax only to find out that there is an emergency broadcast on every channel which informs you that an asteroid the size of Canada is about to strike the Earth in 3...
2...
1...
You are dead.

I go to the grocery store...

thephantombrain : ... and nothing remarkable happens. You pick up your groceries and return to a home that you never really liked. You walk into the door, feeling the oppression of the house itself. As you live in this house longer and longer, you feel you humanity begin to slip away, you wake up often when you thought you weren't asleep. You body is mysteriously sore and you mind feels unrested. As you slip slowly into insanity, the house becomes ever-brighter, stealing from your very life force until you are naught but a withered husk where there was once a man. 
Twenty years after the trip to the grocery store, after agonizing years of waiting and praying. ... you are dead.

I replace the batteries in my mouse.

The mouse explodes, sending you flying through the window and into the jungle in front of a snake. As the snake slowly starts to squeeze the life out of you, an eagle grabs you and takes you far away. Then, an airplane hits you both and you plummet into a volcano. You are dead.

I finally completed Mr. Perfect in Mega Man 9.

Seishiro Leonhart : dude, you play monster hunter?

noahd101 : Sorry man but your comment is spam here, if you wanted to ask me anything, either send me a PM or a profile comment.

Goky490: You are really happy that you completed the mode, you are so happy, but so happy, that you literally explode in happiness, you are dead.

At least you died happy, and that's a good thing.

I still didn't receive my new PC.

(Mr. Perfect isn't actually a mode, it's a challenge that's completed in normal gameplay)
You get it eventually, but that isn't until the year 2500 and you were long dead since then.

I get the Triforce, a real one that works exactly the same as in Legend of Zelda.

Goku490 : Your skin color gets golden, and you become a Hylian. You are now the mightiest creature of the world. But as mighty you are, as boring becomes life. Everything you do, is the easiest thing. Your boredom kills you.

I'll write a review on vizzed.

Ryroe : You're writing a review and you're pausing to think about how you're scoring the music of the game.  You glance up out the window and you frown.  The entire landscape behind your house is now dense foliage.  The woods stretches as far as you can see.  

"What the...." 

You get up and walk out the back door.  The sounds of the city are gone.  Nothing but the buzz of insects and the wind rustling through the trees meets your ears.  Birds fly overhead.

Everything goes silent.  The world waits in hushed anticipation.  A snout the size of a motorcycle sticks out of the treeline 15 feet in the air.  Nostrils flair as the beast inhales your scent.  It forces itself through the trees and stands 20 feet tall, lizardlike, teeth the size of baseball bats.  It bellows a challenge at you.

You look down and see a spear on the ground.  You pick it up and shout back.  The beast is unimpressed and advances.  You crouch, spear tip on an 8 foot shaft pointed at the monster.  You circle each other, gauging, judging.  You lunge forward just as the beast opens its mouth.  The spear slides down it's throat, piercing it's brain from inside its head.  It dies instantly.  You shout victory as momentum carries the beast toward you.  Its 20 tons of muscle and teeth come crashing down on you.

You're crushed to death.