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totaldramaman2
09-02-11 12:27 PM
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09-02-11 04:08 PM
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The claw-less Wolverine...

 
Game's Ratings
Overall
Graphics
Sound
Addictiveness
Depth
Story
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Average User Score
5
3
2
1
2
2
9.5
0.4
3
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10

09-02-11 12:27 PM
totaldramaman2 is Offline
| ID: 453230 | 529 Words

totaldramaman2
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Oh, crud, THIS game. This is X-Men on NES. This game isn't the worst ever, but still, it's note worthy of being bad. It's as bad as Farfetch'd from Pokemon. Seriously. About Batman Returns... that's a long story... I can't promise I'll ever be able to do it, sorry for the lie in the Shaq Fu review. Whether it's the emulators not working, going full screen, or getting cheated out of getting an ACTUAL COPY, it might take a LONG time.

                                                          --- LJN... you have hurt me. ---
So, this is X-Men. Let's start the game. ...Okay, these sprites look decent! But, like in E.T., title screens are DECIVING. Now, we press Start and LOOK AT THAT. Yes, this is the works of LJN, a subdivision of Universal Studios made to make the crappiest games of the late 80s and early 90s. Unfortanetly, this is some of thier best works, but in my opinion, thier best game was Beetlejuice. Back to X-Men, you get all these weird options. I'll be using Practice first. Two of the X-Men (Iceman and Cyclops) have a shooting weapond. Those two are my favorites, so I usally pick them. But don't ever let the CPU use the shooting item. He'll just shoot anything in his sights to oblivian

                                                            --- Wait... that's a second life? ---
So, there's all this crap flying across the screen, and eventually, it kills my Iceman. Crap. I didn't even kill the Cyclops. ...Well, isn't the level going to start over? And why isn't Cyclops doing anything? *Raphidly preeses A and B* Well, Cyclops is still shooting. *Presses D-pad* Wait... I'M IN CONTROL OF CYCLOPS?!?! Why didn't they tell me? I keep running into invisible walls. I don't know if it's just me, or are the obstacles to hard to tell the diffrence from the ground? I think it's true with that ..weird ... garbage disoposal stage. Well, that's what it looks like to me! It's so hared to distungish this, one of the many possiblites of horridness with this "game". And why do I put 'game' between two double apostrophes? Because it's not a game. It's "Garbage Anger-making Mad Evilness".  A.k.a. "G.A.M.E." But it's not a G.A.M.E. either. It's a piece of crap. They didnt even try with anything. Including music. I just muted it to play something better. Maybe like Frank Sinatra or Nyan Cat Smooth Jazz edition or something. Anything but these horrid sound effects and "music. Well, not anything. Definitly not Beaver... Ugh.

                                                             --- Wolverine... WHERE'S YOUR CLAWS?!?! ---
So, I haven't explained what the other 4 X-Men have as weaponds... they all have thier fists. Even Wolverine. YEAH. Wolverine can't even use his trademark claws. Gosh, even in the next LJN X-Men game, you actually have to take out his claws. LJN... you should of thought before making this crap. This is supposed to be a GAME, you know. I can't beleive that some HUMAN could of made this. The horrible graphics, unbearable music, and crappy controls all make this horrible piece of... feces nowhere NEAR worth you time. You know, I've had it with this game. See you next week in my next review!
Oh, crud, THIS game. This is X-Men on NES. This game isn't the worst ever, but still, it's note worthy of being bad. It's as bad as Farfetch'd from Pokemon. Seriously. About Batman Returns... that's a long story... I can't promise I'll ever be able to do it, sorry for the lie in the Shaq Fu review. Whether it's the emulators not working, going full screen, or getting cheated out of getting an ACTUAL COPY, it might take a LONG time.

                                                          --- LJN... you have hurt me. ---
So, this is X-Men. Let's start the game. ...Okay, these sprites look decent! But, like in E.T., title screens are DECIVING. Now, we press Start and LOOK AT THAT. Yes, this is the works of LJN, a subdivision of Universal Studios made to make the crappiest games of the late 80s and early 90s. Unfortanetly, this is some of thier best works, but in my opinion, thier best game was Beetlejuice. Back to X-Men, you get all these weird options. I'll be using Practice first. Two of the X-Men (Iceman and Cyclops) have a shooting weapond. Those two are my favorites, so I usally pick them. But don't ever let the CPU use the shooting item. He'll just shoot anything in his sights to oblivian

                                                            --- Wait... that's a second life? ---
So, there's all this crap flying across the screen, and eventually, it kills my Iceman. Crap. I didn't even kill the Cyclops. ...Well, isn't the level going to start over? And why isn't Cyclops doing anything? *Raphidly preeses A and B* Well, Cyclops is still shooting. *Presses D-pad* Wait... I'M IN CONTROL OF CYCLOPS?!?! Why didn't they tell me? I keep running into invisible walls. I don't know if it's just me, or are the obstacles to hard to tell the diffrence from the ground? I think it's true with that ..weird ... garbage disoposal stage. Well, that's what it looks like to me! It's so hared to distungish this, one of the many possiblites of horridness with this "game". And why do I put 'game' between two double apostrophes? Because it's not a game. It's "Garbage Anger-making Mad Evilness".  A.k.a. "G.A.M.E." But it's not a G.A.M.E. either. It's a piece of crap. They didnt even try with anything. Including music. I just muted it to play something better. Maybe like Frank Sinatra or Nyan Cat Smooth Jazz edition or something. Anything but these horrid sound effects and "music. Well, not anything. Definitly not Beaver... Ugh.

                                                             --- Wolverine... WHERE'S YOUR CLAWS?!?! ---
So, I haven't explained what the other 4 X-Men have as weaponds... they all have thier fists. Even Wolverine. YEAH. Wolverine can't even use his trademark claws. Gosh, even in the next LJN X-Men game, you actually have to take out his claws. LJN... you should of thought before making this crap. This is supposed to be a GAME, you know. I can't beleive that some HUMAN could of made this. The horrible graphics, unbearable music, and crappy controls all make this horrible piece of... feces nowhere NEAR worth you time. You know, I've had it with this game. See you next week in my next review!
Vizzed Elite
You gotta slam if you wanna jam.


Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'

Registered: 08-07-10
Last Post: 3400 days
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(edited by totaldramaman2 on 09-02-11 05:20 PM)    

09-02-11 02:36 PM
rcarter2 is Offline
| ID: 453304 | 106 Words

rcarter2
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This pretty much sums up all the frustrations you can have while playing this game. When you try to control this game, the character you are controlling looks like a chicken with it's head cut off. Zigzag, turn around, shoot in a random direction, then get owned by the enemies. As I tend to advertise, I love a game that is a good challenge. But this is only hard because it looked like a 5 year old programmed the actions you perform. It just sucks. If you played this game without the character select screen, you would have no idea you were playing X-Men. Complete fail.
This pretty much sums up all the frustrations you can have while playing this game. When you try to control this game, the character you are controlling looks like a chicken with it's head cut off. Zigzag, turn around, shoot in a random direction, then get owned by the enemies. As I tend to advertise, I love a game that is a good challenge. But this is only hard because it looked like a 5 year old programmed the actions you perform. It just sucks. If you played this game without the character select screen, you would have no idea you were playing X-Men. Complete fail.
Vizzed Elite
Dominating RGR Competition Hall of Fame Table!


Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'

Registered: 05-01-11
Location: Kansas
Last Post: 2439 days
Last Active: 748 days

09-02-11 02:56 PM
totaldramaman2 is Offline
| ID: 453324 | 17 Words

totaldramaman2
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rcarter2 : They actually hired multiple 12-year olds to work for LJN. It's crazy, man, it's crazy.
rcarter2 : They actually hired multiple 12-year olds to work for LJN. It's crazy, man, it's crazy.
Vizzed Elite
You gotta slam if you wanna jam.


Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'

Registered: 08-07-10
Last Post: 3400 days
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09-02-11 03:00 PM
rcarter2 is Offline
| ID: 453334 | 17 Words

rcarter2
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Normally, I would laugh at something like that. But for this one, it just explains a lot. 
Normally, I would laugh at something like that. But for this one, it just explains a lot. 
Vizzed Elite
Dominating RGR Competition Hall of Fame Table!


Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'

Registered: 05-01-11
Location: Kansas
Last Post: 2439 days
Last Active: 748 days

09-02-11 04:08 PM
totaldramaman2 is Offline
| ID: 453388 | 32 Words

totaldramaman2
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rcarter2 : They had 12-year olds so they could be "inspired" by thier "creative minds". If it weren't for them, I'm sure you wouldn't even be able to walk in this game.
rcarter2 : They had 12-year olds so they could be "inspired" by thier "creative minds". If it weren't for them, I'm sure you wouldn't even be able to walk in this game.
Vizzed Elite
You gotta slam if you wanna jam.


Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'

Registered: 08-07-10
Last Post: 3400 days
Last Active: 2203 days

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