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Whats it like to be a guy in a relationship?

 

10-17-11 04:37 PM
Redrunelord is Offline
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I read through this thread, and I personally think that the vast majority of the problems are cropping up because of misunderstanding. The males here, by large, are also basically saying they are never able to please their "gals" and often goes t extremes trying to please them. The way I see it, you should be able to be 100% natural and not worry about that...though the occasional surprise is nice.

Are there bad gals? Sure, but the way some of the things were worded, it described almost all females as soul-sucking monsters. Some are, doubtlessly as I've seen it, but I just feel that both sides of the party needs to be open minded.

Yeah it can be hard, and yeah there is pressure (who said it would always be easy)...and I do disagree with the statement that whenever a relationship fails, its almost certainly the male's fault. Sometimes it is, but sometimes it is simply a man not willing to appease to someone he doesn't feel proper with...in which case, it shouldn't be a relationship.

Some of you probably seen posts from me commenting that I was not in a proper relationship, and it is in part because I have no intents to just dive in randomly when I know it won't work. I'd rather be alone and be my own self than live under pressure. I guess what it all boils down to is...respect. The male should respect the female, and the female should respect the male. it isn't always easy, but hey...that's how things rolls.

I read through this thread, and I personally think that the vast majority of the problems are cropping up because of misunderstanding. The males here, by large, are also basically saying they are never able to please their "gals" and often goes t extremes trying to please them. The way I see it, you should be able to be 100% natural and not worry about that...though the occasional surprise is nice.

Are there bad gals? Sure, but the way some of the things were worded, it described almost all females as soul-sucking monsters. Some are, doubtlessly as I've seen it, but I just feel that both sides of the party needs to be open minded.

Yeah it can be hard, and yeah there is pressure (who said it would always be easy)...and I do disagree with the statement that whenever a relationship fails, its almost certainly the male's fault. Sometimes it is, but sometimes it is simply a man not willing to appease to someone he doesn't feel proper with...in which case, it shouldn't be a relationship.

Some of you probably seen posts from me commenting that I was not in a proper relationship, and it is in part because I have no intents to just dive in randomly when I know it won't work. I'd rather be alone and be my own self than live under pressure. I guess what it all boils down to is...respect. The male should respect the female, and the female should respect the male. it isn't always easy, but hey...that's how things rolls.

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11-01-11 04:45 PM
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That's a good question. It usually varies. Sometimes it's really horrible to be a guy in a relationship, and sometimes it's easy as hell. That's a difficult question.
That's a good question. It usually varies. Sometimes it's really horrible to be a guy in a relationship, and sometimes it's easy as hell. That's a difficult question.
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11-02-11 05:35 PM
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Well it's tough because we are always the ones making the initial move. We are always the ones expected to ask the other one out and risk getting rejected.
Well it's tough because we are always the ones making the initial move. We are always the ones expected to ask the other one out and risk getting rejected.
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11-03-11 09:54 PM
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Honestly, You could say it varies between each person. A lot of it is give and take. If someone feels the relationship is worth fighting for then you are going to give it your all/change yourself/etc.  I've been with some woman who are just self centered control freaks who want to control every aspect of your life. If you are not with them or spending time with them then they want know WHY and what are you doing. At times even get jealous with hanging out with your friends and tries to change you to the point where you are no longer friends with them.  Guys can be the same way if not worse in the jealously department especially if you are a friends with another man. 

I give 100% into my relationship with my wife and I believe she does the same for me... We generally share the same friends while still having our closest friends to us. We both are very opinionated and driven which  we love that about each other.

Now when it comes to asking someone out it usually gets tough for males because we are expected to make the first move and if we don't then we pretty much lose our chance with her and if we do ask them out then we risk the chances of being rejected/laughed at/ or have that awkward stare where she's thinking to herself "why is this idiot asking me out"...

 
Honestly, You could say it varies between each person. A lot of it is give and take. If someone feels the relationship is worth fighting for then you are going to give it your all/change yourself/etc.  I've been with some woman who are just self centered control freaks who want to control every aspect of your life. If you are not with them or spending time with them then they want know WHY and what are you doing. At times even get jealous with hanging out with your friends and tries to change you to the point where you are no longer friends with them.  Guys can be the same way if not worse in the jealously department especially if you are a friends with another man. 

I give 100% into my relationship with my wife and I believe she does the same for me... We generally share the same friends while still having our closest friends to us. We both are very opinionated and driven which  we love that about each other.

Now when it comes to asking someone out it usually gets tough for males because we are expected to make the first move and if we don't then we pretty much lose our chance with her and if we do ask them out then we risk the chances of being rejected/laughed at/ or have that awkward stare where she's thinking to herself "why is this idiot asking me out"...

 
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11-17-11 02:07 AM
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...It has varied wildly for me. I have had stereotypical girls who talk my ear off and obsess over clothing and celebrities... and girls who have acted very little like a girl at all (beauty pageant queen who got in brawls in their spare time, played video games, rough housed with the brother, liked to build things and liked construction a lot)... girls who would NEVER ask me out unless I asked them and girls who practically lept at me from out of nowhere. When I was a kid, there was this girl I was completely uninterested in who had the biggest crush on me and practically kissed the ground I walked on (kissed my knees once randomly in a cramped car o.0) and I'd have to say the most consistent thing about being the guy in a romantic or potentially romantic relationship has been... I do not have periods. I also have a penis. THAT aside... honestly girls and guys could really be anything, I think, if society didn't force expectations on them so much. People behave the way they do more because of predefined gender roles than anything....

I should say this though. I am a weird guy. I had grown up for a large portion of my life in a household chock full of women with no man in sight. I tend to get along with women better and don't have a lot of the problems most guys do (I can generally avoid being called insensitive unless I break up with her, even being a weird guy can't save me from that). So, I have a hard time emphasizing with some of the complaints I've seen in here. ^^;

Edit: Apologies: Just realized this thread hasn't been active in a week.
...It has varied wildly for me. I have had stereotypical girls who talk my ear off and obsess over clothing and celebrities... and girls who have acted very little like a girl at all (beauty pageant queen who got in brawls in their spare time, played video games, rough housed with the brother, liked to build things and liked construction a lot)... girls who would NEVER ask me out unless I asked them and girls who practically lept at me from out of nowhere. When I was a kid, there was this girl I was completely uninterested in who had the biggest crush on me and practically kissed the ground I walked on (kissed my knees once randomly in a cramped car o.0) and I'd have to say the most consistent thing about being the guy in a romantic or potentially romantic relationship has been... I do not have periods. I also have a penis. THAT aside... honestly girls and guys could really be anything, I think, if society didn't force expectations on them so much. People behave the way they do more because of predefined gender roles than anything....

I should say this though. I am a weird guy. I had grown up for a large portion of my life in a household chock full of women with no man in sight. I tend to get along with women better and don't have a lot of the problems most guys do (I can generally avoid being called insensitive unless I break up with her, even being a weird guy can't save me from that). So, I have a hard time emphasizing with some of the complaints I've seen in here. ^^;

Edit: Apologies: Just realized this thread hasn't been active in a week.
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(edited by Lumian on 11-17-11 02:11 AM)    

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